History Funny / EarthwormJim

* Even the cow gets an EvilTwin with Jim having an evil cow that has the voice of Creator/JimCummings.

-->''Uh, link in food chains (and some), BlahBlahBlah, this is going--! so fast.''

-->'''Brain #1:''' Huh?
-->'''Brain #2:''' Huh?
-->'''Brain #3:''' Huh?
-->'''Brain #4:''' [[OverlyLongGag Gi]][[AllMenArePerverts rls?]]

-->'''Narrator:''' ...But how can our heroes ever hope to get past the sinister guards?\\

-->'''Professor: Monkey-For-A-Head:''' Well, I could, but the suit's power comes from the Battery of the Gods, and I only had one. I tried to get another, and the gods turned me into a breadmaker.
-->'''Psy-Crow:''' Pfft! You're not a breadmaker!
-->'''Professor Monkey-For-A-Head:''' Oh yeah? Check it out! ''(strains, a bell goes off and he pulls a loaf of bread from his coat)'' Actually, it's kinda handy. If I twist the monkey's tail, I can make pumpernickel.
-->''(Cut to a shot of Psy-Crow's REALLY weirded out face)''

-->'''Peter:''' Jim... why don't you just jiggle the handle?
-->'''Jim:''' Peter, you old kettle drum, you're a genius!
-->'''Peter:''' (''Confused'') Kettle drum?

-->'''Peter:''' What did you mean by "kettle drum"??
-->'''Jim:''' Don't question me.

-->'''Jim:''' [[BriefAccentImitation Vaya con Juevos, ya ornery varmint!]] Thus, Bob's evil plan is...
-->'''Peter:''' (interrupts) You think I'm getting FAT, don't you?! Fat like a kettle drum!
-->'''Jim:''' (angrily) Get off my back, DOG BOY!

-->'''Bob:''' (Notices none of the other heroes are accompanying them) [[EvenEvilHasStandards Aren't you guys gonna go, you know, help them?]]
-->'''Hamsternator''' Are you kidding? I'm down five bucks! Deal the cards fish boy!

--> '''Narrator''': We join our heroes... ugh... you can see for yourselves. "Awful danger", blah blah blah.
--> '''Jim''': (snarky) Ah, narrator's too good for our predictable story structure, eh?
--> '''Peter''': Getting his self a 'tude!
--> '''Slug-For-A-Butt''': HELLO?? I'm going to destroy you here, REMEMBER?!

--> '''Narrator''': We rejoin our heroes exactly where they were just a minute ago, thank you ''so much'' for paying attention.

--> '''Narrator''': Later, on ''another'' sound stage...

--> '''Narrator''': [[NarratingTheObvious Later, our heroes skip through the woods, which you may have noticed]] [[ViewersAreMorons since you can ACTUALLY SEE THEM!]]

--> '''Narrator''': Ah, just make up your own line here! It's gotta be better than what's on the script. I mean, really.

--> '''Narrator''': Ugh... anyone mind if I skip the transition speech??
--> '''Wicked Witch''': Sure, I don't blame you. Blah, blah, blah, always the same.
--> '''Narrator''': You said it, sister.

--> '''Narrator''': Of course, the most horrific thing about being the narrator is the degrading hula girl outfit they make me wear.

--> '''Narrator''': All right, Mart- Marty, listen, you have to get me off this show NOW!

--> '''Jim''': Narrator! We have a line here!
--> '''Narrator''': (grumpy) I'm not in the ''mood''...
--> '''Jim''': Then perhaps you like me to unleash these VOCAL CORD-EATING INSECTS ON YA!!
--> '''Narrator''': (frightened) Ah, I'LL SAY THE LINE! I'LL SAY THE LINE! (speedily) ''And so, Jim turns the queen's weapon against her, thwarting evil and saving the day.''
--> '''Jim''': THANK YOU.

-->'''Brain #3:'''

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder: The Video Games]]

[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/41e4e92f_feab_4477_9698_2a53d5469263.jpeg]]
[[caption-width-right:350: "The show's budget ran out! That's the fifth time this week!"]]

* The reason for Jim’s epic quest: [[SeriousBusiness getting sugar for his friends coffee.]]
* Jim tricking Number 7 by impersonating his parents. The cat falls for it so easily, Jim gives an AsideGlance with a wry expression that screams “Well, he was an idiot wasn’t he?”.

* The ending, when Psy-crow goes back to the coffee shop to try and regain his CaffeineBulletTime powers.

--> '''Evil Cow''':You fools! I shall destory you all! Starting with the lactose intolerant! Moo moo! Moo.

* To win each segment of the Puppy Love levels, you need to bring a bomb that Psycrow throws from the control tower. When you do so, Peter Puppy [[OhCrap barks in horror]], pulls the bomb out of the chute and throws it back at the control tower whereupon it explodes.

-->'''Brain #4:''' [[BreadEggsMilkSquick Where the]] [[AllMenArePerverts girls?]]

-->'''TV ad:''' Are you broke? Out of work? Stuck in a rock? Well, that explains why you're watching mid-morning TV you lazy worthless goons! YOU MAKE ME SICK!

In one of the boosts to your intelligence you gain early on, a message reads, "You are now smarter than [[TakeThat most accountants]]."

[[AC:Lounge Day's Journey Into Night]]

** Earlier, The Professor explains why he can't make a second suit:

* The ending of the first game; Jim makes it to Princess What's-Her-Name, and she puckers up to grant a SmoochOfVictory [[spoiler: and the cow you sent flying up at the beginning of the game lands on her, knocking them both into a river/pit of lava. Jim mopes for a moment... then grabs her crown and happily wanders off.]]

* The quiz show portion of [="Villi People"/"Jim is a Blind Cave Salamander"=] in ''Earthworm Jim 2'', with its hilarious MoonLogicPuzzle questions.

-->A) The day he was born
-->B) June 9, 1994
-->C) Today if you have a present[[note]]The answer is B, the release date of the first game[[/note]]

-->A) Jmi
-->B) Mij
-->C) Ijm[[note]]The answer is B; Jim is dyslexic[[/note]]

-->A) Yes
-->B) No
-->C) Yes, but Simon didn't say[[note]]The answer is B; Jim doesn't have any arms, he's an earthworm, remember?[[/note]]

* The ending of the second game; [[spoiler: And so, having defeated the nefarious '''COW''', our hero, '''COW''', wins back the heart of the lovely '''COW'''. In other words, Jim, the Princess and Psycrow -- aka the hero, the love interest and the big bad -- all turn out to be cows in disguise.]]

-->'''Evil:''': [[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain Did I mention I'm NOT A CAT?]]

* As Jim and Peter are being careered into a black hole. Jim tries to think with his four hyper-intelligent brains of a way to escape.

-->'''Jim''': Whaddya mean, you won't take my reservation? [[BlatantLies Of course I'm the King of Spain!]] Listen: "Soy el rey de esponja."\\

* Professor Winged-Monkey-For-A-Butt is not the best flier.

--->(Sound of something hitting the ground hard)

---> '''Narrator''': (frightened) Ah, I'LL SAY THE LINE! I'LL SAY THE LINE! (speedily) ''And so, Jim turns the queen's weapon against her, thwarting evil and saving the day.''

* The universe gets destroyed with Jim and Psycrow stuck floating in a great fortunately. Fortunately, [[{{God}} the Great Worm Spirit]] comes in to help... [[KingOfAllCosmos Taking the form of a sunglasses wearing rabbit bashing some drums.]]

** This bit:

** When asked who kidnapped Santa, [[LawyerFriendlyCameo a reindeer who is totally not Rudolph]] describes the culprit as being a disgusting insect with a butt the size of a Macy's parade float. It turns out to be Queen Slug-for-a-butt, but Jim's first guess is [[TakeThat Rush Limbaugh]].
** In the beginning, Princess questions who Santa Claus is and what gives him the right to judge who had been naughty or nice. At the climax we get this.

-->'''Santa/Woden:''' NORSE GOD OF JUDGEMENT! MAY THE NAUGHTY TREMBLE, BEGORE MY AWESOME MIGHT! YO HO ''HO!''

--->'''Santa:''' You know me by the name of Santa Claus, but in my younger and wilder years I was know by another name. (his voice suddenly echoes and he takes off his red coat revealing he is absolutely ripped) WODEN!

* Peter’s interpretive dance o bow he feels after being fired by Jim. It starts out as a fairly normal ballerina dance (with Peter even putting on a tutu), then It devolves into Peter shouting “I want to be Jim’s sidekick again!” repeatedly.

* ???

* ???

-->'''Monkey-Professor-For-A-Head:''' (Makes very frightened ooking sounds, clearly traumatized by the story)

--->'''Bob:''' Hello, I've come to conquer your planet.
--->'''Aliens:''' Ah!! We Surrender!

--->'''Bob:''' Earthworm Jim! I shall destroy you!
--->'''Jim:''' (Completely deadpan) Now Bob, you promised if we let you play Poker with us you wouldn’t destroy anyone.
--->'''Bob:''' Alright… But if you don’t stop winning soon, I ain’t responsible!

---> '''Narrator''': We join our heroes... ugh... you can see for yourselves. "Awful danger", blah blah blah.
---> '''Jim''': (snarky) Ah, narrator's too good for our predictable story structure, eh?
---> '''Peter''': Getting his self a 'tude!
---> '''Slug-For-A-Butt''': HELLO?? I'm going to destroy you here, REMEMBER?!

---> '''Narrator''': We rejoin our heroes exactly where they were just a minute ago, thank you ''so much'' for paying attention.

---> '''Narrator''': Later, on ''another'' sound stage...

---> '''Narrator''': [[NarratingTheObvious Later, our heroes skip through the woods, which you may have noticed]] [[ViewersAreMorons since you can ACTUALLY SEE THEM!]]

---> '''Narrator''': Ah, just make up your own line here! It's gotta be better than what's on the script. I mean, really.

---> '''Narrator''': Ugh... anyone mind if I skip the transition speech??
---> '''Wicked Witch''': Sure, I don't blame you. Blah, blah, blah, always the same.
---> '''Narrator''': You said it, sister.

---> '''Narrator''': Of course, the most horrific thing about being the narrator is the degrading hula girl outfit they make me wear.

---> '''Narrator''': All right, Mart- Marty, listen, you have to get me off this show NOW!

---> '''Jim''': Narrator! We have a line here!
---> '''Narrator''': (grumpy) I'm not in the ''mood''...
---> '''Jim''': Then perhaps you like me to unleash these VOCAL CORD-EATING INSECTS ON YA!!

---> '''Jim''': THANK YOU.

--->'''Santa:''' In my wilder years I was know by another name. (voice suddenly echoes) WODEN! NORSE GOD OF JUDGEMENT! MAY THE NAUGHTY TREMBLE! \\
''He proceeds to lay a massive beatdown on Queen Slug-for-a-butt'' \\
'''Jim:''' Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. And [[PunctuatedForEmphasis he. Kicks. Butt!]]

-->'''Bob the Killer Goldfish:''' [[PunctuatedPounding Wake up ya stupid hunk of]] [[{{Mondegreen}} beef fat]]!

* ???

* This scene where Evil tries to get the titular book from Jim with his PaperThinDisguise.

* ???