"If you did not cry, you have no soul."

I see this phrase pretty often, especially on this site's Tear Jerker examples, and oh, does it annoy the hell out of me. I will usually have seen the work in question, and I know exactly what they mean. It's not that I didn't feel it, I really did. In fact, I consider myself a big sap, a firm believer in Manly Tears and Tender Tears. But I usually don't cry.

Pixar movies are really bad at getting this sort of reaction, and with good reason. Toy Story 3 was probably the closest I've come to crying in a long time. From the song line "Our friendship will never die..."*Cut to Black*, there was literally no moment that I didn't expect to turn into a blubbering mess. It never happened

The truth is, I don't cry that often in Real Life, but I know that wasn't always the case. I was a bit of a crybaby as a kid, and even up to middle school would occasionally break down in math class (not a coincidence). Off the top of my head, works that made me cry included the finale of Dinosaurs, Dr Suess's The Lorax (two Green Aesops; God, I'm such a hippie), and the endings of both Titanic and Armageddon (don't judge me).

But more recent events in life, breakups and funerals included, haven't quite managed to bring on the Water Works, even when I think it would be for the best. Even when I really want to. Even when I try. The last big cry I can remember was over a dead cat. In 2006.

So, does crying really indicate the presence of a soul, or has mine just shriveled up?

edited 2nd Feb '11 1:45:22 PM by Carbonek13

I've seen things that have jerked at me emotionally, but I haven't cried in years, so it's more of an expression. "If this didn't emotionally effect you, you're either a living piece of shit or you weren't paying enough attention." is what it tries to communicate I suppose.

I guess the problem is that some people view it as sappy, unrealistic, or otherwise so in that sense they have no soul.

I have to say parts of Restrepo were extremely saddening to say the least since its actually real.

It means you are not the type of person to show much emotion. The "you don't cry, you are a soulless monster" line is mostly comical, and simply means that you will very likely be emotionally touched by the scene in question. Some MIGHT actually cry, but I highly doubt everyone will.

And yes, I'm also that sort of person. I also almost cried for Toy Story 3, but never quite made it all the way. In fact, I pretty much assume that I don't cry ever. That's pretty normal, especially amongst the holders of the mighty Y, who always learned that men don't cry.

No point getting upset about.

I retract my statement, I forgot that I cried during Restrepo. I bawled like a child at the part of the video showing the reaction of Alpha to scout leader Rougle dead and covered by a tarp.

edited 2nd Feb '11 1:51:32 PM by Barkey

This is another stupid phrase that signifies nothing except that the troper who wrote it wants their entry to be NOTICED and considered IMPORTANT very badly.

Move this thread to Special Efforts, maybe we can organize a mass deletion of this phrase and those like it.

That said, I do cry easily but usually for odd things. Dumb phrases like this don't help me get in the moment, however. Now when I do watch/read the real thing I'll think of some troper whining "YOU HEARTLESS MONSTER", which detracts from the moment.

edited 2nd Feb '11 1:54:09 PM by melloncollie

I haven't cried in over a year, and that instance was due to a death in the family. And I don't remember the last time I cried before that. But I'm guessing it's like "brutally subverted" or "How did we go this far without mentioning X?". In other words: "LOOK AT ME MY EXAMPLE IS MORE IMPORTANT!"

edited 2nd Feb '11 2:02:45 PM by Anomalocaris20

Flowers For Algernon. Of course I was 16, but still...

I read that when I was about 13. I thought it was kinda sad at the end, what with the Foregone Conclusion that Charlie is going to die just like Algernon, but I didn't cry. Maybe I don't invest much emotion into characters.

That's not what happens, the rat died, but he just regresses to his original state.

The implication is that just like Algernon regressed to the point of death, Charlie is going to regress until his brain is smooth and unfunctional. It doesn't actually happen in the text, but it's implied. We do see Charlie regressing to even lower intelligence than he started with.

Jeeze, now I'll never reread the book.

I rarely cry about fictional things—my eyes may water somewhat, but that doesn't mean I'm going to start sobbing. I don't care if that makes me cold-hearted.

I don't cry. I do however reach a Heroic BSoD.

Sometimes I cry over relatively minor things, like getting lost in the middle of a storm or getting bad marks on an exam or just plain feeling lonely. But then, seriously sad things don't make me cry at all. It's wierd like that.

Honestly, while there are fictional things that can affect me emotionally, I've never cried about them.

I agree with the sentiment that it's people trying to make their example notable in a place where none exists.

Case in point: I am an emotional guy. Being bipolar might have something to do with that. Any emotion I feel, I feel in true Large Ham fashion. When I get excited, I'm typically like GOOOD MORNING, MOTHER FUCKER! LOOK AT HOW FUCKING AWESOME THIS IS! WHAT, YOU DON'T THINK THIS IS THE COOLEST/SADDEST/MOST FUCKING HILARIOUS THING EVER? YOU BASTARD!

In short, when something is sad, i think it's pretty sad. On the same token, I haven't cried since 2008. Before that, it was since 2002. You can't really judge your capacity to emote by whether or not you stream tears.

Its one of those cases where people try to use hyperbole where it just comes off as annoying and patronizing. "Oh look how sad this was HOW CAN YOU NOT BAWL LIKE A CHILD?!"

I remember after 9/11, there was that remix of Heaven by DJ Sammy with a little girl crying about her dad who supposedly died in the attacks. I never cried listening to that song, and I always thought it was exploitative, not to mention uncreative. Everyone thought I was a heartless bastard. Turns out it was scripted anyway and the little girl speaking in the song was fed lines.. BY HER DAD.

As I've gotten older, I cry much more easily now. I have no idea why. I seriously cry over the dumbest things when I'm watching t.v./movies/books/movies etc. It's really embarrassing.

edited 2nd Feb '11 7:30:14 PM by SelphieFairy

I cry during a lot of films, even ones I've seen before that didn't make me cry earlier. Like Cars. That was the only Pixar movie to make me cry, though. >_> I was never big on Toy Story, so the third one was just sad at best.

But dammit, I do, indeed have a soul. D: I've just.. done more than my fair share of crying over the years. Though really, the only film-related things that make me cry are when people are brutally bullied, like in A Clockwork Orange. When I'm in an already-emotional mood, happy endings also get me. <.< But.. but yeah. It's a silly phrase.

It annoys me when people use such patronizing phrases. I've noticed this thing is very big in the music sections.

Like others in this thread have said it's probably for the most part just a lame attempt at hyperbole. I think overall there is more contempt toward those who cry too easily than toward those who don't cry easily enough.

I kinda wanna go through and change a lot of these, it's really annoying to read.

I find one movie that people oft criticize me for not feeling sad during is Click.

Though to my credit I didn't feel sad as I was filled with utter contempt for the main character who was married to KATE friggin' BECKINSALE and ignored her for a "career". Pfft, what an idiotic main character.

I find this to be classic example of people coming from one end of something not understanding people on the other. In this case, people who tend to be emotional can't seem to understand the more stoic types (not that its any better in reverse). Personally, I tend to get slightly annoyed when I hear this phrase, since I lean more to the "stoic" side–there are only a few things that can really make me cry, and even then I usually get just teary-eyed than full-out bawling.

So basically its an inversion of the Manly Tears trope: You can cry and still be a Bad Ass; if you don't, you're worse than forty Hitlers.

Some more close calls:

• Rewatching The Fox And The Hound, and totally being blindsided by the old lady's inner monologue while abandoning Todd. Sure didn't remember that part.
• Where The Wild Things Are. I wrote a review on this. Not a good date movie.
• Farscape series finale, although that was more of a righteous "You Do Not End A Show Like That!" anger. Peacekeeper Wars made everything better.
• The Real Life page, especially the 9/11 stuff.
• The last book of The Dark Tower.
• The Fall
• My last girlfriend being surprised that I agreed with her that it would be better if we broke up, as well as a few other minor moments.
• The girlfriend before that... the less said, the better; but the whole period afterwards might be a source for my annoyance at this phrase (among other things).

Actually, I remember that I have cried several times more recently... from laughter. Can't remember what set it off, though.

edited 2nd Feb '11 9:49:29 PM by Carbonek13