"Give him a chance, he's funneh."
— Nyx Sparkle, referring to Trollvorlord
"Oh, hooray! In a lifetime of evil, at least he didn't add 'Animal Cruelty' to the list!"
"We must know when to be strong... and when to show compassion."
Anon #1: Fate Tertium Averruncus promotes destruction of entire civilizations, squishing innocent passerby with giant monoliths, and completing primary education. What a nice chap.
Anon #2: Well it's only fair that they have a future before he destroys it.
Fate: No, they did it out of their own free will. I picked up 57 more of them and sent them to school. Well, it looks like it's a hobby for me.
Rakan: Hey, hey, you serious? Doing such a nice thing and all...it's surprising.
I've murdered tens of thousands in cold blood. If I can't ice the sad-eyed puppy too, I don't deserve the job.
But yeah, I've racked up such a rep for killing things that it actually makes you suspicious when I take a moment to help out a mom and her little girl. Maybe you think there's a bit of a weird vibe there and that's all you need to go to town, right? Shrinks and mommy issues.
—Alcatraz, Crysis: Legion
Problem is, the viewers in this scene are supposed to be rooting for the Romans, led by Russell Crowe. The Roman emperor watching the battle is also meant to be a good guy. What's a movie to do?
Quick, give them a dog!
It doesn't matter in Gladiator that Romans didn't use dogs on the battlefield, or that the dog disappears from the movie immediately afterward. It's a very simple equation: The good guys are whichever team the dog shows allegiance to, because the dog would never make that kind of mistake, especially if it's an adorable dog.
"ALIENS FROM A DISTANT WORLD! OH, I'M SO HAPPY! THIS IS WONDERFUL! I NEVER GET TO BE HAPPY!!!"
Dr. Brainstorm, Calvin and Hobbes: The Series