"That's me, jerkass Homer!"
— Homer Simpson, The Simpsons
"Me, nice?! I've never been nice in my life! I'm allergic to nice!"
— Bowser Koopa, The Adventures of Super Mario Bros. 3
Namine: So why were you saying Zex wouldn't help us?
Axel: Cause he's a jerk.
Zexion: It's true, I am a jerk.
Axel: Cause he's a jerk.
Zexion: It's true, I am a jerk.
"Why do you put so much energy into pissing people off?"
— Kagura, Azumanga Daioh
"Oh you call that love? Trying to push yourself on me with that stupid haircut and that tacky suit? No you're an asshole! Not to mention a creep, you don't know a damn thing on how to treat women. You're sub-human scum. Burn in Hell!"
"There are men in this world who go about demanding to be killed. They argue in gambling games; they jump out of their cars in a rage if someone so much as scratches their fender. These people wander through the streets calling out "Kill me, kill me." Luca Brasi was such a man. And since he wasn't scared of death, and in fact, looked for it... I made him my weapon. Because I was the only person in the world that he truly hoped would not kill him."
— Vito Corleone, The Godfather
"You know, there's a word for people like you. I'll give you a hint: It starts with 'bi' and it ends with 'otch'."
— Eikichi Onizuka, Great Teacher Onizuka
"What'll happen to your children when I've killed you? When Mummy's gone the same way as Freddie?"
— Bellatrix Lestrange (to Molly Weasley), Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, in what proves to be her final mistake
Angel Dust: Just don't get your taco in a twist, baby.
Vaggie: Was that you trying to be sexist or racist?
Angel Dust: Whatever pisses you off more.
Vaggie: Was that you trying to be sexist or racist?
Angel Dust: Whatever pisses you off more.
"It can't be sustainable for him to be so casually insulting to everyone."
— Hisao Nakai, Katawa Shoujo
"You know, Cooper...I've only been around you a minute or two, but that's enough time for me to know that I don't like you very much."
"Let them stay upstairs. Let them. Too many ways those monsters can get in here. We'll see who's right. We'll see, when they come begging me to let them in down here."
—Harry Cooper, Night of the Living Dead (1968)
"Let's be clear here. We're talking about a person that a couple of total assholes find rude."
— Jerry "Tycho" Holkins, (talking about Harlan Ellison), Penny Arcade
"You seem unhappy. I like that."
— Janitor, Scrubs
"The selfish man is like a mangy dog chasing a cautionary tail."
— Sergeant Calhoun, (describing Turbo), Wreck-It Ralph
"I aspire to more creativity than the common asshole. I'm more of a ... class-hole, if you will."
— Black Hat Guy, xkcd
"You're so unpleasant even I'm impressed. Do you visit orphanages to explain there's no Santa?"
— Emma Frost to Agent Brand, Astonishing X-Men
Noah: I'm going to enjoy taking control of your body, Kaiba. The first thing I'm going to do is make a big donation to the local children's hospital, and then I'm going to give all the Kaiba Corporation employees a big raise.
Kaiba: You will do no such thing!
Hello, my name is Zak Gramarye. And I'm a jerk!
Welcome to the troupe! I'm Magnifi, and I am also a jerk.
"Were you born a loser, or did it just take practice?"
— The hidden announcer, Wave Race Blue Storm
"OH MY GOD! YOU LEFT A SEARCH FOR A LOST CHILD TO FUCK THE MAIL-LADY?! First the sandwiches, then the evil laughter, now abandoning a child to get laid! Dude, you're not gonna find the kid in her vagina! [...] I can't take this guy, I really can't. He isn't just an asshole, he's like, a compilation of assholes to make the world's biggest asshole! The Six-Million Dollar Asshole!"
— The Nostalgia Critic, The Tommyknockers review, about Becka's cheating husband Joe.
Dorothy: So, Mike, you hungry?
Mike: No, I am sustained by the sadness of others.
Mike: No, I am sustained by the sadness of others.
Awfully unsporting of me, I know, but what the hey, I've gotta have some fun! (Beat) And besides, it's really duck season!
— Daffy Duck, Rabbit Seasoning
I mean, he's wholly and unapologetically Evil, but more to the point, he's kind of a dick.
— Rich Burlew describing Xykon, The Order of the Stick
Everybody knows
That you're just an asshole
Everywhere you go
People wanna go
"Oh, everybody knows"
Everybody knows
So don't pretend to be nice
There's no place you can hide
You are just an asshole
That you're just an asshole
Everywhere you go
People wanna go
"Oh, everybody knows"
Everybody knows
So don't pretend to be nice
There's no place you can hide
You are just an asshole
— Skylar Grey on the Eminem song "Asshole"
Gao: Nobu isn't very happy with you.
Fisk: That man is never happy with anyone.
Gao: True.
Fisk: That man is never happy with anyone.
Gao: True.
Yondu: You like a professional asshole, or what?
Rocket Raccoon: Pretty much a pro.
Rocket Raccoon: Pretty much a pro.
"What is your goal here? To get everyone to hate you? Because it's working!"
—Peter Quill to Rocket Raccoon, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2
"He’s a thief. He’s a killer. And worst of all, he’s... he’s rude."
"You know, we basically just met you, so it's kinda telling that we all know your personality is flaming crap mixed with garbage."
— Denki Kaminari to Katsuki Bakugou, My Hero Academia
Carl: F*ck off!
Conker: Why is it everybody's so offensive 'round here?
Carl: Either bring me back me missing cogs, or F*CK OFF!
Conker: You don't have to shout.
Carl: I'm deaf! Speak up or f*ck off!
Conker: Why is it everybody's so offensive 'round here?
Carl: Either bring me back me missing cogs, or F*CK OFF!
Conker: You don't have to shout.
Carl: I'm deaf! Speak up or f*ck off!
"Even if I had helped him seize this ship, he would probably just fire me out of the first airlock... Oh, and he's rude."
— Knock Out, Transformers: Prime
Nobody could ever accuse me of empathy, of genuinely caring for people. In fact, they'd probably say that Sam Krieg is a cold son-of-a-bitch. And they'd be right. People don't interest me.
—Sam Krieg, The Secret World
"I am an asshole, I am an asshole! I am SUCH an asshole! Look at me!"
Scout Finch: Hey Miss Dubose.
Mrs. Dubose: Don't you say "hey" to me, you ugly girl!
Mrs. Dubose: Don't you say "hey" to me, you ugly girl!
"I talked to the manager of the drive in, his name is Austin Johnson, and you're really gonna like him. He's what you'd call your perfect asshole."
—Detective Larry, Drive-In Massacre
Detective Larry: You're gonna run your business from the slammer before long, if you don't shut up!
Austin Johnson: Yeah? Well you either charge me, lock me up and get off of my back- or let me go, because I don't care if half the goddamn valley gets chopped up! Now what are you gonna do?
Austin Johnson: Yeah? Well you either charge me, lock me up and get off of my back- or let me go, because I don't care if half the goddamn valley gets chopped up! Now what are you gonna do?
Alice: Oh, let's change the subject. I'm sick of hearing about sculptors. Nobody knows how to do that anymore, much less the busboy from The Yellow Door.
Walter Paisley: Who do you think you're talkin' about?
Alice: Don't shout at me!
Walter: I don't like you...
Alice: Nobody asked your opinion, Walter! You're just a simple farm boy, and the rest of us are sophisticated beatniks.
Walter Paisley: Who do you think you're talkin' about?
Alice: Don't shout at me!
Walter: I don't like you...
Alice: Nobody asked your opinion, Walter! You're just a simple farm boy, and the rest of us are sophisticated beatniks.
Cady Heron: Hi, I don't know if anyone told you about me, I'm a new student here, my name is Cady Heron.
Kristen Hadley: Talk to me again and I'll kick your ass!
Kristen Hadley: Talk to me again and I'll kick your ass!
Charlie Geller: Yeah. Casey, I've always hated you because you were a prick in college and you are a prick today!
Casey: Thanks Charlie! Still living with your mom?
Casey: Thanks Charlie! Still living with your mom?
"This is Pavlo, our general handyman. He's really ugly, isn't he? Don't be afraid to say so. Can't understand you anyway, he speaks only Romanian. You see that gorgeous smile? He's felt very handsome ever since he got those false teeth."
—Miss Tanner, Suspiria (1977)
"Santa's not coming for you. He was shot down by the Russians."
—Constance Lenz to her own son, Black Christmas (2006)
"Fuckin' devil-worshiper. I can't wait until my dad kicks you out on the streets and you've got to blow truck drivers for food like your psycho mum."
—David, Deathgasm
Elijah C. Skuggs: Do I seem like a weirdo?
Ricky Coogan: Nope. You seem like a regular dumbshit old redneck to me.
Ricky Coogan: Nope. You seem like a regular dumbshit old redneck to me.
"Oh, look. Losers. And they're standing much too close to me."
—Caleb Robertson to Catie and Anonymous, BoxxyQuest: The Shifted Spires
"Fuck me, I'm out of breath. Now what i was trying to say was how sorry I am that Mullet decided to top himself. A bit selfish of him really, leaving Mr. Jizzy no mates here, not one fat spaz to call a friend."
—Bradley, Tormented (2009)
"Good riddance. Always giving to others instead of to yourself. Why did you live like that? What was the point? What a load of crap."
—Jong-gil, Train to Busan
Heather Duke: Hi, everybody. Door was open. Veronica, did you hear? We were doing Chinese at the food fair, when it comes over the radio that Martha Dumptruck tried to buy the farm. She belly-flopped in front of a car wearing a suicide note.
Veronica Sawyer: Is she dead?
Heather: No... that's the punchline. She's alive, and in stable condition. Just another case of a geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing miserably.
Veronica Sawyer: Is she dead?
Heather: No... that's the punchline. She's alive, and in stable condition. Just another case of a geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing miserably.
"Hey, doll, could you scare up another round for our table over here? And tell the cook this is low grade dog food. I've had better food at the ballgame, you know? This steak still has marks from where the jockey was hitting it."
—Al Czervik, Caddyshack
"Lost? Frightened? Confused? Good! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
—I. M. Meen, IMMeen
Ash: Hey, don't you know how to say anything nice?!
Paul: Nice to who? I wouldn't know what else to say to a loser.
Paul: Nice to who? I wouldn't know what else to say to a loser.
—Pokémon the Series: Diamond and Pearl, "Different Strokes for Different Blokes!"
Marvin Milk: Butcher, what the fuck is wrong with you, man?
Billy Butcher: I'm sure you're gonna tell me.
Marvin Milk: That shit you pulled with Ryan, and now this cold-hearted shit you said to Kimiko? How can anybody be such a complete asshole??
Billy Butcher: Practice.
Billy Butcher: I'm sure you're gonna tell me.
Marvin Milk: That shit you pulled with Ryan, and now this cold-hearted shit you said to Kimiko? How can anybody be such a complete asshole??
Billy Butcher: Practice.
"Is your idiot brain getting fucked by stupid?"
—Homelander, to Ashley, The Boys (2019), "Glorious Five-Year Plan"
"I don't know how good your hearing is, but you got about 15,000 people calling you an asshole!"
Stone Cold: I don't know how good your hearing is, AJ, but you got about 18,000 people calling you an asshole!
(later...)
AJ: You know what, Steve? At your old age, you've turned into a real asshole!
(later...)
AJ: You know what, Steve? At your old age, you've turned into a real asshole!
—Ditto to AJ Styles on the August 9, 2019 episode of Raw, to which the latter fires back with the same trope
"Does your rudeness know no bounds, sir?"
— Dudley to Balrog, Street Fighter IV
Ru Hui was horrible. It’s almost like his goal in life was to be as obnoxious and hurtful as he could possibly be.
Caller: That reminds me, Janet running around trying to catch a butterfly with a net was insensitive and inappropriate field study.
Producer: Yes, but that's Janet's character: insensitive and inappropriate.
Producer: Yes, but that's Janet's character: insensitive and inappropriate.
— The Magic School Bus, "Butterfly and the Bog Beast"
