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Quotes: Consummate Liar
"Every word she writes in a lie, including 'and' and 'the.'"
Mary McCarthy on, er... 'colleague' Lillian Hellman, The Dick Cavett Show

"I caught Truman out in a dozen or so lies that everyone else preferred to believe. I can't think what labor of Hercules I thought I had undertaken, and certainly to no useful end, because the instant lie was Truman's art form, small but, paradoxically, authentic. One could watch the process. A famous name would be registered. The round pale fetus face would suddenly register a sort of tic, as if a switch had been thrown. 'Eleanor Roosevelt. Oh, I know her intimately!"
Gore Vidal on Truman Capote, Palimpsest

''I lied. That's what I do.
Benjamin Linus, LOST

"Sicilians are great liars; the best in the world. I'm Sicilian. My father was the world heavy-weight champion of Sicilian liars. From growing up with him, I learned the pantomime. There are seventeen different things a guy can do when he lies to give himself away. A guy's got seventeen pantomimes. (A woman's got twenty, a guy's got seventeen, but...) If you know them, like you know your own face, they beat lie detectors all to hell."
Vincenzo Cocotti, True Romance

"Lying is a skill like any other, and if you want to maintain a level of excellence, you have to practice constantly."
Elim Garak, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine ("In Purgatory's Shadow")

"Inexperienced operatives give up their cover ID under pressure. Experienced ones play it harder."
Michael Westen, Burn Notice

Zack: Is your name Walter Burke?
Walter Burke: [serious] No.
Polygraph Interrogator: [troubled] True.

I'm the most terrific liar you ever saw in your life. It's awful. If I'm on my way to the store to buy a magazine, even, and somebody asks me where I'm going, I'm liable to say I'm going to the opera. It's terrible.
Holden Caufield, The Catcher in the Rye

Toph: And stick to the truth. I'll be able to tell if you're lying.
Azula: Are you sure? I'm a pretty good liar. I am a four-hundred-foot tall purple platypus bear with pink horns and silver wings.
(Beat)
Toph: ...Okay, you're good. I admit it.
Avatar: The Last Airbender The Day of Black Sun Part 2: "The Eclipse"

One lie after another. You make it look easy.
Ryuk (to Light), Death Note

Chip Cheezum: [If Revolver Ocelot were president], every time there's, like, a State of the Union address, it'd just be him going "I tricked all of you, America! I tricked you into thinking that I tricked you! And then I tricked you again! Bet you didn't see that one coming!"
GeneralIronicus: "Even I don't know how many times you've been tricked!"
Chip Cheezum: "I got a trick-diary!"
GeneralIronicus: "I tricked myself into tricking me to trick you, to trick me to trick the Patriots!"
Chip Cheezum: "I can't do anything without tricking! I can't even ask for pepper without tricking them into giving me the pepper!"


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