Heinz Doofenshmirtz: PERRY THE BANJO-PLAYING PLATYPUS?!
...Or him acting out a job which he's bad at ("The Lemonade Stand") ...
Doofenshmirtz: What kind of a plumber are you?
(Perry takes off hat)
Doofenshmirtz: A platypus plumber?
(Perry puts on fedora)
Doofenshmirtz: Perry the Platypus Plumber?
(Perry takes off his plumber belt)
Doofenshmirtz: PERRY THE PLATYPUS??!!
...Or him being in another person's body ("Does This Duckbill Make Me Look Fat?") ...
(Perry, in Candace's body, busts into Doofenshmirtz's building)
Doofenshmirtz: A teenage girl?
(Perry puts on his fedora)
Doofenshmirtz: PERRY THE TEENAGE GIRL?!
(He presses a remote, a cage falls on Perry)
Doofenshmirtz: Sorry about the tight fit, but you know, if I had known you were going to disguise yourself as a teenage girl, I would have set a bigger trap.
...Or him disguising as a thing Doofenshmirtz is supposed to be stealing (Lawn Gnome Beach Party Of Terror) ...
Doofenshmirtz:(collecting his stolen lawn gnomes, gets Perry disguised as a lawn gnome next) Oh, here's a funny looking one. (Perry punches Doofenshmirtz)
Doofenschmirtz: What the—?
(Perry takes off his disguise)
Doofenshmirtz: A platypus?
(Perry puts on his fedora)
Doofenshmirtz: PERRY THE PLATYPUS?!
...Or him disguising as someone Doofenshmirtz hired ("Flop Starz") ...
Dr. Doofenshmirtz:(when Perry comes in wearing Groucho Marx glasses) Oh, are you my new temp? Well, let me just get you up to speed; I know it's a bit of a piece of dirty mess. I'm just putting the finishing touches on my latest maniacal plan. You see, in a few minutes, I will unleash an unprecedented reign of terror upon the entire... (holds up magnifying glass to a map of the world behind him) Tri-State Area, and Perry the Platypus will never be the wiser! (Perry removes glasses) PERRY THE PLATYPUS?! You're a temp? Are times that hard?
...Or Doofenshmirtz accidentally buying him and planning to use him on his schemes (Got Game?) ...
(After Perry knocks Doofenshmirtz down and takes his Misbehavinator)
Doofenshmirtz: Hey! What was that all about?
(Perry takes off his dog disguise and puts on his fedora)
Doofenshmirtz: Perry the Platypus?!? Uh, ha ha, I...I'm very embarrassed about all that 'coochie-coochie-coo' stuff...
...Or Doofenshmirtz not being able to immediately recognize Perry ("Tree To Get Ready") ...
Dr. Doofenshmirtz: Pretty good don't you think, Perry the Platypus? (spits out drink) PERRY THE PLATYPUS?! (screaming to pigeons) Get him!!! Stop him!!! He's headed for that clearly-marked exit!!!
...Or Doofenshmirtz realizing that he brought Perry along when he tried to escape from him ("One Good Scare Ought To Do It") ...
Dr. Doofenshmirtz: Okay, let's make sure I didn't forget anything in my haste. Let's see, I've got my old basketball, the lamp, the Christmas lights, Perry the Platypus, the Disintivaporator, my golf clubs... PERRY THE PLATYPUS!? [Beat] THE DISINTIVAPORATOR!? [Beat] MY GOLF CLUBS!? I don't even play golf!
...Or him trying to impersonate someone Doofenshmirtz idolized ("A Hard Day's Knight").
Perry:(mouthing a CD recording) Upon an evil winter's heart, the heavy hand of regret infrequently alights. The malevolent part is one charm without the cumbersome shackles are sentimental intro (the CD begins skipping) spect spect spect spect spect spect spect spect spect spect (Perry whacks the CD player with the book)
Dr. Doofenshmirtz: Hmm, that's funny. I don't remember you saying "spect" so many times. (Perry explodes out of his disguise) Dr. Wexler, you're a platypus. (Perry puts on his hat) PERRY THE PLATYPUS!?
...Or Doofenshmirtz happening to bump into him and recognizing a resemblance from his disguise ("Vanessessary Roughness").
Actually a subversion; he didn't managed to fully recognize Perry since he didn't take off his disguise and put on his fedora.
Dr. Doofenshmirtz:(crashes into Perry) Hey watch where you're... Say, you look fabulous! But haven't I seen you somewhere before?
...Or Doofenshmirtz happening to recognize an item which looks just like him ("Hip Hip Parade") ...
(Doofenshmirtz falls on the Perry balloon of the parade)
Doofenshmirtz: A platypus balloon?
(balloon hits a sign and the fedora from the sign falls on the balloon's head)
Doofenshmirtz: A PERRY THE PLATYPUS BALLOON?!
Go to the movie page for perhaps the best examples ever of Doof not recognizing Perry.
("Mommy, Can You Hear Me?")
(Perry is trapped. He shakes off his hat and enters pet mode)
Doofenshmirtz: Aw, poor little regular platypus. Did mean old Perry the Platypus put you in this trap?
(He frees Perry who immediately attacks him and puts his hat back on)
Doofenshmirtz: PERRY THE PLATYPUS? I don't know how you got free, or what you did with that other platypus, but it doesn't matter.
Or for that matter on All Hallow's Eve...
Doofenshmirtz: And what are you supposed to be? A kid in a sheet?
(The "kid in the sheet" takes off the sheet to reveal...)
Doofenshmirtz: A platypus in a sheet?
(He puts on the fedora)
Doofenshmirtz:PERRY THE PLATYPUS IN A SHEET?!?!
...Doofenshmirtz will never be the wiser!!
Pretty much any of the Doofenshmirtz jingles, especially the fact that the jingle happens everywhere he happens to be. (Some of the more memorable examples being "Doofenshmirtz holding a bucket" from "Perry Lays an Egg", "Doofenshmirtz Evil is carpeted" from "the Chronicles of Meap", "Doofenshmirtz house in the suburbs" from "Put that Putter Away" and "Doofenshmirtz walks to the diner" from "Ain't no Kiddie Ride"). It even extends to "Doofenshmirtz's ex-wife's sport sedan."
Candace always seeing the talking zebra, especially when hallucinating.
All the weird presents Ferb got on Bastille Day.
Lawn Gnome Beach Party of Terror
Linda is weirded out by the fact that Candace hasn't called her, and starts going home as Candace is crowned queen of the beach. As she gets two minutes away, Candace runs out and, after a short conversation, she starts explaining what happened that day, with her mom's face getting more and more weirded out every time it cuts to her.
The entire narration of the surfing contest.
"First up in the surf contest is Bobby Nelson. Oh! And Nelson eats it on five-footer! And there's Django Brown shooting the curl, and here comes Buford Van Stomm! OHH! He pummels Brown with a Philadelphia traffic stomp! And now he's got him in a Half-Nelson, now a Full-Nelson, OH! And now he's actually beating him with Bobby Nelson! Here's the scores from our judges, and Buford doesn't like it one bit. [Buford smashes the table with Bobby]
Next up is Phineas Flynn, and it's great to see a young surfer show such confidence. [Phineas is leaning back on his surfboard, reading a book.] Uh-oh, what's this? [Buford splashes through Phineas. The real Phineas is on a surfboard nearby with a projector.] Oh, those kids today and their holographic projections. He's in the pipeline, now he's hangin' ten! He's hanging twenty! He's hangin' thirty-two! Now he's just hangin'! The crowd loves it! I don't think there's a name for that! The crowd is doing the wave, and Phineas is surfing it! Let's go to the judges. 10 to the 5th power, infinity, and oh! It seems Phineas Flynn's radical surfing has made judge #3 re-think Einstein's theory of relativity! Cowabunga, laws of nature!"
"Run for your lives! It's GNOME-AGEDDON!"
The episode title itself is hilarious. It feels as if it immigrated from Invader ZIM.
(Doof presses a remote button)
Doofenshmirtz: You are mine now!
(The garage door opens)
Doofenshmirtz: No, that was the garage door opener.
(Doof gets another remote)
Doofenshmirtz: You are mine now!
(The TV turns on)
Doofenshmirtz: And that was the TV remote.
(Doof finds the right remote and pushes the button)
Doofenshmirtz: YOU ARE MINE NOW!
(Perry is trapped)
Doofenshmirtz: Now I shall finally rid myself of you! But first, pay your attention to the giant screen and-
(He actually pressed the garage door opener which closes the garage door)
Doofenshmirtz: Maybe I need to turn the cable on first?
Marty the Rabbit Boy and his musical blender: perhaps the best sight gag in the whole series.
Candace: I knew I should have taken blender lessons!
Lights, Candace, Action!
When Phineas and Ferb film the big scene of their movie, which involves the monster/princess Candace having to fight the villagers (cue bullets being thrown at her) the air force (cue toy planes) and the Space Armada from the planet Plumbing Supplies (cue plumbing supplies). Then Phineas discovers he forgot to take the lens cap off, and says that was a good rehearsal, and that they need to film it again, much to her obvious displeasure.
Phineas has Candace wear a banana hat so she can get chased by a monkey for a realistic chase scene. That doesn't turn out too well... so Phineas does a retake, this time having Candace wear a sandwich hat and Ferb chase her.
After Dr. Doof hits a button that shrinks any instrument beginning with "B" down to a microscopic speck, Candace is going into her room to get her bass. Then a banjo. Then a whole bunch of other instruments, and five minutes later we see her pick up two more, one being a balalaika and the final group being bagpipes.
Candace distracting her mother during the "Fabulous" musical number. "Hot towel!"
When the boys are trying to get Bobbi to come with them and he refuses, it cuts to Ferb wearing a knight's helmet and holding a spiked mace. Phineas tells him, "Not yet, Ferb," meaning they were actually willing to beat him senseless if he wouldn't go with them.
The Ballad of Badbeard
Candace is exposed to hallucinogenic moss, goes crazy, and foils Doofenshmirtz, while at the same time spouting non sequiturs and being uncharacteristically cheery.
Candace (in Doofenshmirtz's new lair): Hey Perry, I'm going to get something from the vending machine, (approaches Big Red Button labeled "lair self destruct") you want anything?
Agent P: (gestures frantically to try and stop her)
Candace: If you say so! I'm gonna get me some beef jerky! (presses button; ground starts shaking and small rocks start falling.)
The fact that they managed to get Candace completely tripping outpast the radar is hilarious in itself.
Grandpa Flynn: I was just about your age when I first heard about Badbeard's treasure. I'd come up here every summer to search for it. I felt drawn by the excitement and adventure. Of course, then I discovered girls, and the rest is a blur.
Baljeet and Buford's exchange when Phineas goes to open Badbeard's treasure:
Buford: Bad beard forever, dude.
Baljeet: And you don't even have a chin!
Zebra: Oh, it gets much stranger, Kevin.
Norm's introduction, where he ends up chasing Perry through town, whilst yelling things like "The enemy of the Platypus is man!", "Are those slacks new? They make you look slimmer!", and "Let's invite our wives next time!"
Phineas: It's half man, half bull! It's a minotaur!
Norm: My name is Norm!
Phineas: It's Norm the minotaur!
The filmstrip is hilarious, from the uncertainty over the plural of "platypus" to one of the threats being "duplicating imitatable (sic) stunts seen on television."
Candace: Phineas! Just what do you think you're doing?
Phineas: Candace, great! You're just in time. Check out this cool looking helmet we made for you (produces a helmet with snakes on the top like Medusa's hair). And we built you your own chariot that looks just like you.
(cut to chariot, which has a hideous expression)
Candace: Oh that's ridiculous (making same expression as chariot) I do not have wheels!
Ferb keeping his hands over his eyes after Candace is mistaken for a gorgon. Also Candace trying to deny her "power" only to be met by stone statues no matter which way she turns.
The Best Lazy Day Ever
This little gem, where Doofenshmirtz gets hit by his Uglyinator:
Doofenshmirtz: Oh no! Now I'm ugly! I'm- (His face is the same) Oh. I get it. Hardy har har.
The scene where Candace realizes her entire sense of self-identity is rooted in busting her brothers.
Candace: Face it, you can't do anything unless you're trying to bust them for doing something! And if they're doing nothing, then...WHO IS CANDACE?!?
Evil Phineas and Ferb from Candace's imagination. When Candace is trying to rationalize why Phineas and Ferb would be doing nothing, she comes up with the idea that they made statues of themselves to trick her that they weren't doing anything, complete with evil expressions and laughing.
Boyfriend from 27,000 B.C.
Right after Phineas and Ferb have seen a documentary about cavemen followed by a fast food commercial:
Phineas: I know what we're gonna do today!
(Jump Cut to Phineas and Ferb eating food from the place in the commercial)
Phineas: I know what else we're gonna do today!
Phineas: "Think about all the practical applications a caveman can have in the modern world!"
Phineas: "Actually, you know besides politics, I can't think of anything."
A Hard Day's Knight
Doofenshmirtz borrows a fire breathing dragon robot. With a cockpit in the mouth. You can guess what happens next.
Doofenshmirtz: Yours may have laser eyes, but mine breathes (activates the cockpit, the robot breathes fire through the mouth, burning Doofenshmirtz) fi—-IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRE. (Beat) That was a stupid design.
Not to mention the fact that the dragon's opponent is a giant robot of Queen Elizabeth I. With LASEREYES.
Phineas actually building a horse.
The Oh Crap look on Doof's face when he realizes he just pressed the emergency eject button.
Charles' laugh after his butler says, "Oh, dear, I have punned."
The running joke about the new version of Jane Eyre to anyone who's at all familiar with that particular work's adaptation history.
The part where Candace daydreams that busting Phineas and Ferb leads to Jeremy proposing to her. The POV cuts back to reality as she says "I do."
As Perry is on his way to his secret hideout...
Singer: ''(As Perry shoots through a pipe) Perry the Platypus! (Record Needle Scratch as Perry falls through a broken section of the pipe that Carl is repairing)
Carl: Sorry about that, Agent P. (Picks up Perry and throws him through the other pipe before continuing to work on the pipe)
Singer: Herman the Hedgehog! (A secret agent hedgehog falls through the broken section of the pipe)
"Well, according to the World's Most Pointless Book of World Records..." *trumpets* This gets repeated several times, until it turns out Buford is the one playing the trumpet...
Baljeet: Is that absolutely necessary?
Buford: Why? Does it bug ya?
Baljeet: Well, yeah, a little.
Buford: Then yeah, it's necessary.
Baljeet: Alright, fair enough. Hey, where is Perry? *trumpets*
"So Perry the Platypus as they say in Mexico Dosvidanya. Down there that's two vidanyas."
Phineas: We're gonna put on a laser light show! And, as a grand finale we're going to laser our faces into the comet! That way, when it comes back in 73½ years, we can all show our grandchildren! Oh yeah, my parents are cooking steaks for everyone.
Isabella(in a dreamy voice): You had me at "our grandchildren."
Candace/Perry: *sighs with pleasure* Oops, I mean... *lousy imitation of Perry's chortle*
One Good Scare Ought to Do It!
Pretty much the whole shebang, but specifically Buford's bit while he's dressed as Jeremy's little sister for the haunted house Phineas and Ferb built to get rid of Isabella's hiccoughs.
Baljeet dressing up as the scariest thing he can imagine: a failed math test.
"You can run, but it won't be to the college of your choice I tell you!"
Doofenshmirtz telling Perry about his mentor:
"Sadly, he was captured in the middle of his latest scheme, TO SET FIRE TO THE SUN! But before he was locked away, Kevin asked a favor of me: To prevent them from discovering his hidden lair and all it's secrets, would I please SET FIRE TO THE SUN! I was like, dude, you really got to let that one go, it's a ball of fire! It makes no sense."
Candace shows the haunted house to her mother:
Candace: See? Absolute terror! These little creeps have destroyed our backyard, leaving this ugly mess in its place.
(the house has vanished and there's nothing to see but Baljeet)
Linda: Hi, Baljeet! That wasn't very nice, Candace.
Candace: It's back! I told you! It's returned!
Baljeet: Oh, excuse me. I forgot my satchel.
Monogram's first theory about why they lost Doofenshmirtz' signal:
Monogram: First, that magical elves have caused Doofenshmirtz to vanish into the land of angry corn people.
Toward the beginning, after Candace's rehearsal call to Jeremy:
Candace: That's it, you little psycho! I'm calling Mom! And I am not using the banana this time!
Phineas: You guys heard that, right? It wasn't just me?
Prof. Gevaarlijk: Oh, Heinz...How can he be your nemesis? He doesn't even have a hat!
Dr. Doofenshmirtz: No, no! I...I made that mistake a couple of times, too, but that's him! I swear!
Prof. Gevaarlijk: In your letters, you said your nemesis was 'a suave, semi-aquatic personification of unstoppable, dynamic fury.'
Dr. Doofenshmirtz: He iiis! No, you've just got to see him in action. Here, here, I'll let him go. *removes restraints* Go ahead, Perry the Platypus, thwart my plans. *awkward silence* C'mon. Let me have it. *further awkward silence* Thwart away, big guy.
Dr. Doofenshmirtz: No, no! Wait, wait, wait, wait! He's just about to do something. Wait...for...it...
Out of Toon
Doofenshmirtz builds a device that makes people dance uncontrollably. Both he and Perry are hit by the ray, and as they dance together, Doof looks at the audience and says, "To add insult to injury, the platypus is leading."
The look of Candace's face when she sees the animation studio dance away along with everyone else.
The epic-level role-reversal, from "Norm, I know what we're going to do today!" to "Bless you, Perry the Platypus!"
Norm: Aren't you a little old to be building a fort?
Doofenshmirtz: No, no I'm not. Shut up.
"Behold- The Rainbow-inator! Soon there will be a GIANT rainbow that will spread across THE ENTIRE TRI-STATE AREA!... or at least, that's the plan anyway". Complete with the appropriate hand movements.
Not to mention the whole subplot with Vanessa & Candace switching clothes ("I look like a candy cane!").
Norm: Whatcha doooin'?
Doof: Whatcha doin'- What does it look like I'm doing?
Candace tries to explain to Jeremy that the clothes she's wearing don't belong to her. She starts off saying "I'm not wearing these clothes," then has to clarify that sentence, then has to clarify the clarification, and so forth. The whole monologue spirals out of control, sounding increasingly insane as she gets increasingly agitated. All the while, Jeremy just stares.
Then Candace gives up, poses, and asks seductively "Do you like it?"
Major Monogram singing "Gitchee Gitchee Goo".
Monogram: I work alone, Carl.
Carl: Sorry, sir.
Monogram: It's a solo.
Just the way Norm announces "I'm drilling!"
And also "Don't forget, Friday is cake day!"
Definitely can't forget this:
Vanessa: He has evil schemes! Most people don't even have regular schemes!
What about when Perry kept trying all day to get into his lair but couldn't because of the cone on his head?
That Doofenshmirtz keeps getting upped by baking soda volcanoes all through the episode. At the end he accidentally ends up through the portal to mars, is about to be crowned King... until the Martians place the crown on a baking soda volcano.
Not to mention a flashback to Doofenshmirtz's college days where he briefly took up poetry after repeatedly failing at science fairs:
The ending, where Candace has spent the day thinking her friends are ignoring her:
Candace: It's funny, I kinda thought you guys were avoiding me.
Some guy who wasn't there a second ago: Actually, I was trying to avoid you.
Candace: Do I know you?
Guy: No, that's how great it's been working. Unknown Guy is out. Peace!
Candace's misinterpretation of Stacy's text message (written in chatspeak).
The scientist's Sanity Slippage from looking at rocks on Mars for years, all while ignoring Candace.
The Lake Nose Monster
The Lair Entrance/The Ride scene. All of it. Perry's complete deadpan reaction to it all combined with the fact that they were going to give him a raise but their focus group (children) liked the ride more than a piece of paper with numbers on it makes it infinite-billion times better.
Perry escapes Doofenshmirtz by flushing himself down the toilet. At the end of the episode, Doofenshmirtz tries the same thing but fails.
Doofenshmirtz: I know, I can get out the same way Perry the Platypus did. Oh, oh, oh! That didn't work at all! Now I really gotta do the laundry.
Interview with a Platypus
Candace insulting all the animals, then realizing they were able to understand her thanks to Phineas and Ferb's animal translator. They proceed to chase her throughout Danville while upbeat 60's pop music plays.
Phineas being able to tell apart all the seemingly identical platypuses in Danville from Perry, and one of his reasons for dismissing one being "too cartoony". Also, the last platypus turning out to be a duck with a beaver tail taped on.
Even the thoroughly heartwarming song of the episode has one when Candace sings about changing her name to Larry because she ran out of rhymes.
Candace: A while?! You mean we're stranded!? That means we won't get to Jeremy's party before the sun sets! We'll be stuck here forever, eating rocks and bugs, then I'll have to marry a monkey and have monkey-kids and name them Xavier and Amanda! (Sobs)
The look of absolute hatred that Perry gives to the fake platypus Buford and Baljeet made at the end of the episode. The fake platypus is CMOF material in and of itself (its tail is a frozen waffle with a bite taken out of it), but Perry's reaction takes it Up to Eleven.
Perry holding his wrist communicator and later his hat in his mouth to prevent Buford and Baljeet from noticing.
Hide and Seek
A rather subtle one - you need to pay attention for it. At the start of the episode when Isabella suggests they talk about their feelings, she catches Ferb's attention. When Phineas and Isabella share gazes, he then however awkwardly looks away.
Baljeet ends up performing a totally rocking heavy metal anthem to conformity and the public school system.
Candace: If you don't stop that racket, I am SO GONNA BUST YOU... empty backyard?
Stacy: Candace, stop trying to bust your backyard.
Phineas enjoying the massage chair:
Phineas: Ferb you've gotta try this chair. I can't feel my brain.
Phineas: You know Ferb, I think I know what I want to do every day.
Phineas: (While vibrating) Ferb check it out, my fingers look just like snakes!
No More Bunny Business
(Perry is on the roof surveying the neighborhood with binoculars)
Phineas: Look, Ferb. There's Perry.
Perry: *reverts to pet mode*
Phineas: Maybe that's where he disappears to all the time. Well, if he got himself up there, he can get himself down.
Candace: Do you know what this is?
Phineas: Uh...Is it not a rabbit?
The lyrics to "With My X-Ray Eyes," especially "Sometimes photons behave like a wave, but they're particles when you reflect 'em."
Doofenshmirtz is beaten by a potted plant. Never before has there been a "villain" so hilariously harmless.
"I swear, of all the aquatic mammals I hang with, you are truly the most uncooperative!" This is beautiful. I wonder if that whale in "Perry Lays an Egg" is secretly with the OWCA.
Isabella and the Temple of Sap
Shop assistant: Can I help you, ma'am?
Professor Poofenplotz: Yes, can you tell me where you've moved the Stiff Beauty hairspray?
Shop assistant: Oh, sorry, ma'am. That product has been discontinued. As it turns out, only amusement park clowns used it, and ever since the old amusement park closed down, Stiff Beauty just hasn't been selling.
Shop assistant: Discontinued.
Poofenplotz: So, what you're saying is that Stiff Beauty will no longer be sold?
Shop assistant: Yeah, that's what discontinued means.
Poofenplotz: How about I discontinue you, from this dimension! (Zaps the shop assistant with a ray gun, sending her to some other dimension)
Shop assistant: This so isn't worth minimum wage.
The Fireside Girls' banter from the same episode is priceless.
Isabella: So, did you guys decide what patch to get today? 'Cause I have a suggestion.
Isabella's crazy fantasies, one of which ends with Phineas turning into a centaur and them riding off together.
Isabella: For Phineas!
Other Fireside Girls: For Phineas!
Isabella: And Ferb, too!
Other Fireside Girls: And Ferb, too!
Ginger: And Baljeet!(gets one of her badges removed)
Cheer Up Candace
Doofenshmirtz: Ah, Perry the Platypus! You know, it occurred to me that I should've been fighting fire with fire, and by fire, I mean Perry the Platypus, and by fire, I also mean Perry the Platypus. It occurred to me while I was on fire.
The ending where it seems like Vanessa and Candace are just going to let the little girl keep the doll, but then Vanessa just swipes it away from her and leaves her crying. Dr. Doofenshmirtz was impressed.
When Perry uses Phineas and Ferb's teleporting device to make Doofenshmirtz's Mimeinator disappear:
Doofenshmirtz: (After the Mimeinator disappears) ... Sure, why not?
Personally, I got a kick out of the fact that this time it was Jeremy who was worried about disappointing Candace, when it's pretty much always the other way around for them.
Jeremy reveals the mechanical exoskeleton that's really been making him dance. Candace screams, the audience gasps in shock... and then it cuts to Stacy, who just says "That's kind of disturbing."
The first appearance of L.O.V.E.M.U.F.F.I.N., that is all.
What Do It Do?
The ending, when the two anti-romance rockets fall in love with each other and fly away.
Ferb: Well, if you reverse engineer the human heart, you're bound to find love at its core.
Buford: And gross, smushy, red stuff!
Ferb: Yes, love and gross, smushy, red stuff.
Irving: And ventricles!
Ferb: Actually, I think ventricles is already included in gross, smushy, red stuff.
When Perry and Doofenshmirtz are flying over France:
Doof: *leaning over* "PIERRE!" *ducks back in, snickering* "Did anyone look? I bet, like, half the people down there were looking around, like, 'Who called my name?'"
A little one, but wait for Linda's cry of "Don't touch it!" - if you pause at the right moment (or are watching for it) you can see that all three of the kids were about to press the button. Yes, even Candace.
Phineas: (referring to Candace) I should have her plan my wedding. Ferb, make a note of it.
Isabella: (off-screen) I got it!
Candace: This is a disaster! Look at this cake! It has a chicken in it!
Aunt Tiana: Oh my.
Candace: And look at my hair! I think it may also have a chicken in it!
The part where Doofenshmirtz is stuck in the elevator. That annoyed look on his face is priceless!
I Was a Middle-Aged Robot
Carl: As I was saying, sir, I may have a solution. Anticipating this exact situation, I built robot replicas of the Flynn-Fletcher family. We can get Agent P to operate the Mr. Fletcher robot until we can replace him with the real Mr. Fletcher!
Major Monogram: Wow. ...That's a bit creepy, Carl.
Carl: Yes. ...Yes it is.
Anything involving Perry operating robot!Lawrence.
After Candace has practically puppy-proofed the house, Jeremy brings over his sister, Suzy. As Suzy is an evil little sister, she closes in on Candace with a Slasher Smile. The conversation goes like this.
Suzy: So, Candace, are you ready to have some fun?
Candace: No no no, I'm good. I hate fun!
Suzy: I've got a little game we can play!
Suzy: It's called making...
Candace: (biting her nails) Paper?
Suzy: (in a suddenly happy voice) Dolls!
Candace: PAPER DOLLS?!?!? (registering what Suzy just said) Huh?
Buford has Baljeet in a baby carrier. That's funny enough but then this happens...
Phineas:We have to blur the line between skateboard and skateboarder. We can combine dirt biking, ATV racing, in-line skating, street luge, motorized scooters, and Bulgarian folk dancing. Of course, all this extreme fun requires extreme safety: shoulder pads, goggles, gloves, Bulgarian folk athletic supporters, and rocket boosters, razor wire, grappling hooks, and laser blaster. Then we lock it all together with an indestructible titanium exoskeleton that increases strength, jumping ability, and other physical attributes 100 times, including the senses and folk dancing ability. *Record Scratch* What, you think we should have more Bulgarian-folk-related elements? Oh, less. Less Bulgar— Whoa, I thought we were on the same page, but no, it's cool. Whatever.
Stacy: Then what does the Dangerbil do?
Candace: I told you, you're my henchman. Hench or something.
Vanessa: Hey Dad, I just got some great lemonade form the new stand on the street. It's really sour on the- (Suddenly slips) Oh!
Doofenshmirtz: Ah! Aw! That smarts, Perry the platypus!
Vanessa: Uh Dad, you know he's not here right?
Doofenshmirtz: Yeah I know, but I'm sure it's his fault.
While Candace is trying to see who might accompany her to the mall by checking the contacts on her phone:
Candace: (Jeremy's picture appears) Jeremy? No, I can't talk about Jeremy to Jeremy. (Stacy's picture appears) Mad at Stacy. (Jenny's picture appears) Jenny? Pigeons. (Linda's picture appears) Mom? No way. (Buford's picture appears) Yuck! How did he even get in here?! Delete! (deletes Buford's contact) Okay, who else? Jeremy, Stacy, Jenny, Mom. Jeremy, Stacy, Jenny, Mom. Jeremy, Stacy, Jenny, Mom. Jeremy, Stacy, Jenny, Mom....(a logo that says 'No other contacts' appears on the screen) GASP! How can I only have four friends?! And one of them's my MOM!!!!
Candace sees her mother in one direction and Stacy in another, and the need to choose between busting her brothers or making up with her friend breaks her brain:
Candace getting stuck bouncing on the spot on an escalator, and pausing her exclamations of pain to say, "Oh, there you are, Perry".
Nerds of a Feather
Doof N Puss. Just....Doof N Puss.
Just one of the scenes:
R.I.C.K. (Major Monogram): I'm detecting some strange out-of-character behavior from our mayor recently which has me concerned. Here he is from a news report a year ago. Notice how he waves. It goes side to side, see? Again, side to side. Now here's footage from just two days ago. Watch. See, his hand goes up... and then he transforms into a wolf with fiery red eyes and runs howling into the misty night.
Doofenshmirtz: Now that you've mentioned it, that is unusual for him.
The random shots of things exploding during the fight against the ninja vampires.
"The problem with you is you're completely delusional."
In the credits, its hidden due to how funny Rusted is, but when it gets to Doof's character, it says Doofenwitch, the witch part which has been scribbled out and replaced with a hand writter "WARLOCK!"
We Call it Maze
Doofenshmirtz: Welcome to my evil SPACE STATION! STATION, STATION, STATION...COOKIE! STATION... Wait, did you hear that? The "cookie" part? I think my echo must be broken.
Doofenshmirtz: ...and with this Tiltinator and I'm gonna do it all in space! SPACE... SPACE... COOKIE... SPACE... There, there it was again? Did you hear that? My second to last echo is broken, I'm going to have that checked.
Buford: Hey, I never got my metaphor cheese! cheese, cheese, cheese...wombat! cheese... Hmm. My echo must be broken.
Buford: I am to metaphor cheese as metaphor cheese is to transitive-verb crackers.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Meet Max Modem!
Candace: But you were Lindana and you wanted to have fun!
Linda: Well, now I'm Linda and I wanna stir broth.
Am I the only one who thinks that would make a hilarious follow-up single/ Brick Joke?
After Lawrence as "Max Modem" makes his big entrance, everyone backstage starts out reluctant, but they all end up convincing themselves that they've heard of him.
Perry vs. the automated -inator. "You cannot defeat me, Perry the Platypus. Doctor Doofenshmirtz has programmed me with all of his knowledge of you." (Perryremoves hat) "Perry the Platypus, where did you go?"
Candace: "Woohoo I just sang backup for Lindana!"
Linda: "Oh you can call me 'Mom,' sweetie."
Candace: "I just sang backup for Mom... nah, just doesn't have the same ring to it."
The sight gag in the elevator room: a line in the middle of the room with a sign reading "No O2 above this line".
There's another in that same room - in almost every shot in the 'No O2' room, you can spot a mouse hole. The building was built less than an hour previously, which means that the hole was either included in the plans or somebody just thought it would look good there. The inherent silliness of this is always worth a smile.
"Would an idiot build... this?! Wait, wait, not that, that's just a cork with a jellybean taped to it. But don't judge it, it's a layered idea!"
Linda: I'll be in the dairy section if you want to yell at some cheese. Would you like that, honey? Would you like to yell at some cheese?
Candace: A little.
Linda: Well, come on then.
Then comes the scene when she actually yells at some cheese.
During the credits, Monogram is annoyed that his song was cut off twice during the episode. After Carl convinces him to try again (citing the last song, Carpe Diem), Monogram begins to sing only for the credits to end.
Doofenshmirtz: [glares] "I'm your daughter. I will stop being sarcastic and untie you."
How can you not mention Lawrence's shower-hat, and the epic henpecked husband joke it sets up?
Lawrence:: Would you like to yank my chain?
The entire sequence after "I wonder where the party went?"/"Somewhere nice, hopefully". First we get the cut-away gag to reveal that the party had been zapped into Doof's pants, and then his decidedly calm "Well obviously something's amiss". The best part was, undoubtedly:
Doofenshmirtz: Oh great, you broke it! Now the non-inator is pointing in the ''wrong direction! The wrong direction!
(Cut to a man working on pipes while watching an instructional video)
Man on video: When fixing pipes, make sure the arrow is pointing in—
(The non-inator's ray zaps the TV)
Doofenshmirtz on TV: —the wrong direction! The wrong direction! The wrong direction I tell you!
(Pipe builds up and explodes)
Isabella using "the magic of digital editing" to make Phineas' voice say various things, like "We'll be together forever, Isabella" or propose marriage to her. Even funnier since Candace walks in on her doing this.
Phineas having flashbacks to various clips and the other characters asking if they were supposed to see something.
Baljeet gets into an argument with the singer of "Lunar Taste Sensation" over whether or not it's his fault that they didn't have any marshmallows for rocky road ice cream.
"Baljeet, could you please stop arguing with the soundtrack?"
On top of all of that, when the song repeats for the credits, we're treated to this exchange:
Disembodied Reggae Space Voice: We left the marshmallows at home. I blame Baljeet.
Baljeet: Hey, I thought we discussed this earlier!
Disembodied Reggae Space Voice: It's in the lyrics, man!
Buford trying to get a cow to say "Moon".
When Doof tries to get help with growing his plants, he tells us how the store owner yelled at him because he doesn't have a green thumb, he should stop asking him questions, and "My mere presence in the store was killing his plants".
Doof's face when he realizes that "green thumb" is a metaphor.
Also when he realizes that his neighbor's garden is really a plastic display.
Followed shorty by a jetpack-induced wedgie when he insists that he doesn't need help looking like a fool.
Candace and Stacy's increasingly screwed-up attempts at making lamb cobbler. And when Stacy tries applying some Oven Logic... it actually works, producing a perfect lamb cobbler.
And then Stacy lampshades this, pointing out they didn't even add any lamb into it.
Ask a Foolish Question
Our song is synchronic, not the least bit ironic. What you hear is exactly what you see
"Why does everything explode so easily?"
Candace's reaction to Mom's frizzed out (and blonde) hairdo after she comes home is just priceless.
The scene when Irving gets hit by Doofenshmirtz's Least-Likely-inator. Just... all of it.
The Disney Acid Sequence that is the fun house. And when Candace is hit by the Least-Likely-inator and starts cleaning it up, she is accompanied by the music sped up and in reverse.
Doof's fight with the mindless platypus who was mistaken for Perry.
Monogram: Oh... the Marsh Maneuver! I haven't seen one of those since 1974!
Carl: '74? You had a perm back then!
Monogram: STAY OFF THE INTERNET, CARL!!!
Dance, Baby! will completely crack you up, especially if you don't see it coming at all the first time it happens (and you likely won't).
Even if you don't bust up laughing, there, you will once you see/hear the actual lyrics. Case in point: "Never eat a cactus if you're out of practice".
Doofenshmirtz getting interrupted at the end of the episode:
Doofenshmirtz: CURSE YOU, PERRY THE— (phone rings and he answers it) Hello? Oh, hi, Vanessa. Yes that was my -inator. Listen honey, I'm in the middle of something, hold on one second. (yells) —PLATYPUS! (to Vanessa) So, how was class?
Norm's sarcastic prototype head has some pretty amusing lines.
Monogram trying to figure out text messaging.
Magic Carpet Ride
Perry's complete deadpan in response to seeing Lawrence and the boys fly past, riding on the living room floor was fantastic. You'll believe a platypus can be the Only Sane Man.
Bad Hair Day
Shot in the Butt with a Dartwill elicit a few giggles, if for no other reason than the abrupt ending— but if you watch the video of it, you can see exactly how accurate Doof was with the "17 seconds" crack.
Carl's traumatized reaction to spending time in Doof's basement.
Monogram messing with Carl's head by touching Carl's ear, leading him to a believe that there was a brown recluse on him was worth a chuckle.
The weird bird. It was amusing anyway, but Perry's reaction sealed the deal.
There's quite a bit about the Meatloaf song. It becomes absurdly hilarious to ponder what lyrics are being used in such a music style and the surrealist pictures help.
Phineas's inspirational speech, with newspaper (one of which sticks onto Phineas's body for a moment), a bird, and a sink blowing past in the background. And him ending the speech with, "Where's Perry?"
Not to mention we see that the windy effect is being generated artificially by Ferb with an electric fan.
Phineas and Ferb Interrupted
The Blueprints song, all of it, really, from Candace and Buford being so oddly cheerful, to the ending with Doof as Uncle Sam and Perry as Lady Liberty...
Perry's scowl during his and Doof's portion of the song (which is only made funnier by the latter's goofy expression during the same number).
The surveillance footage from the beginning is a great Continuity Nod, after the "We've got hours of that" gag from back in "Misperceived Monotreme" - the whole, 'we've got surveillance cameras planted in every square inch of Doof's building' thing (including the bathroom) - but it gets even better when you realize that this time Heinz is singing "He's a semi-aquatic egg-laying mammal of ACTION!"
The fact that Dull-and-Boring!Phineas is utterly fascinated by completely random stuff.
"Hey Ferb, did you ever notice that the sidewalk is filled with little sparkly bits?"
The song that plays as Norm is starting his day. It's so wacky and off-kilter, yet cheerful as can be... much like the show itself. Norm's perpetual grin and love of making "crunchy eggs" makes the whole thing even more hysterical.
Candace and Stacy's exchange about her hypnotism plan.
Stacy: Why do you want to do this, Candace?
Candace: I have to meet Jeremy in the park today, but I can't go unless I get this busting out of my head!
Stacy: But hypnotism? It's just so 1843 of you.
Stacy: You know, 1843 when James Brade published the "Rationale of Somnambulism" in which he invented the term "hypnotism", named after the Greek god, Hypnos.
Candace (in a stunned tone): How do you even know that?
Stacy: It's written on your poster. Apparently he also invented the comb-over. Freaky.
Candace: (still stunned): Why would I have bought that poster?
When Candace discovers the truck stop, she starts her usual rant on busting them...while acting as a waitress. And then going through an entire musical montage being the waitress before slow realization hits her.
Somehow the very slowness of that realization just gets funnier and funnier every second it draws out...
Tour de Ferb
Phineas: Come on, Baljeet! Don't let a little thing like all your male ancestors getting mauled by tigers during a bicycle race get you down.
All of the ridiculous (moreso than usual) scenarios Perry was shoved into (being forced into a shirt with Carl in a heart on it and a bear suit, among others).
Buford "correcting" Ferb's British cousins on identifying a football.
Made even more hilarious when he shows up to the match wearing a helmet and shoulder pads, then tackles Ferb's cousins throughout it.
"I once saw Ferb play an entire game of soccer using a pumpkin, and he didn't even break it! To this day, his motivation for doing so remains shrouded in mystery."
"'Anglophile'? I thought your family was from Wisconsin!"
"Philosophers... get a job, thinky-boy!"
"British curses are very specific!"
Eliza's song on proper manners suddenly transforming into a heavy metal number with Eliza playing an electric guitar.
Candace's thought on practicing posture by balancing books on your head: "I don't get it. Do people not have bookshelves in your country?"
How about Jeremy finally catching on and messing with Candace's head? He gets some grade-A snarking in before she decides 'To heck with it' and abandons her latest ploy to impress him. It's actually rather heartwarming in its own right.
This episode shows just how special the Doof - OWCA relationship is. Doof has to call OWCA sick in case he has a flu.
He might not have to call in. He takes the nemesis relationship very seriously, and probably calls in sick to be polite. So Perry doesn't waste his time while Doof isn't being evil.
"No, the curse is broken. Sometimes you just miss."
During the 'You're totally messing with me!' sequence, you can occasionally see the football game being played in the background. It's just a little thing, but it's hilarious to see Phineas, Ferb, one of the Peles and one of the Beckhams darting past over and over while Candace is learning a 'valuable' lesson.
Evil Lawrence. That's exactly as funny as it sounds.
The boys' reactions to seeing him acting evil in an evil event are amusingly nonchalant.
Phineas: I think that's dad.
Ferb: (Beat) What was the topic of his lecture, again?
Phineas: Hi, Dad!
(After he's been returned to normal)
Phineas: So, how did it go, Dad?
Lawrence: I'm not absolutely sure boys, but I think I just became the king of the pharmacists.
Lawrence's general ineptitude for evil falls squarely between CMOF and Crowning Moment of Heartwarming. Even he realizes that he's doing things horribly wrong. Rodney and Doof comment on this phenomenon:
Rodney: I didn't think anyone could be more incompetent at being evil than you.
Doof: Me neither.
Dr. Doofenshmirtz (unintentionally?) replicating his humiliating video.
Doof: I thought this was the talent competition!
"I'm Dr. Diminutive, and I don't have a Napoleon complex...Napoleon had a me complex!"
You had to see it coming a mile away, but this exchange from the musical number was worth a laugh, too:
Dr. Diminutive: (He's been disqualified for being too short) You can't do that!
Candace being afraid (for good reason) of villagers.
Gimmelschtump!Jeremy, oh goodness, his accent.
Jeremy: (holding Candace's mp3 player) Vat about your music box mit ze Tiny Cowboy?
The hilarious lampshading:
Phineas: I know what you mean, Ferb. It does seem like more than 104 days.
Candace inexplicably disintegrating after exposure to the sun right after Phineas insists that she won't.
Phineas: (beat) Okay Ferb, we're gonna need a dustpan and some glue.
Doofenshmirtz going to use the bathroom, only to remember he used his Gimmelschtump-inator on it. Then, when Perry destroys the inator, Doofenshmirtz starts to yell his Catch Phrase, only to stop and say "Oh, never mind!" after his bathroom turns back to normal.
Escape from Phineas Tower
Baljeet: Legally speaking, what is our liability here?
Isabella, Buford and and Baljeet talking about how worried they are in a totally uncaring tone of voice, all while covering the sleeping Candace in whipped cream and cards.
Isabella: Why did you install a hot tub in this [the potato maker]?
Phineas: I think the real question is 'Why wouldn't we install a hot tub?'
The ending of the episode itself, after Ferb's obligatory line. Earlier in the episode, there was a throwaway gag about a list of "S words seldom used by children" (I know, I know, it's not what you're thinking.) At the end of the episode, Phineas uses another word on the list and it's just something about Ferb's absolute deadpan as he crosses it off that makes it hilarious.
The normally inexpressive Norm doing an Eye Take and his mouth falling off when Dr. Doofenshmirtz informs him that he does, in fact, have a self-destruct button.
The kids practicing saying "goodbye" in Ferb Latin, which involves blowing raspberries. For several seconds straight. Made funnier when Irving shows up randomly to join in.
"I don't think we have anything to say to each other! Not after the..." *sniffle* "...JAZZ HANDS!"
A Phineas and Ferb Family Christmas
During Isabella's Song "Let It Snow", Isabella kisses a Phineas shaped snowman which causes it to melt.
The caveman speak is amusing.
"(Gasp) Canduk mak a foomfa!"
Caveman!Doof watching the drops fall on rocks and going into hysterics. It's so utterly retarded, but it's impossible not to laugh at.
All of Dan and Swampy's photo animation scenes. Especially the end, when they realize they need their Once an Episode song and make one up on the spot, which eventually turns into a caveman version of "Gitchee Gitchee Goo".
Dan: How about Zu-bu-da-yia, zu-bu-da-yia.'
Swampy: Do it again.
Gurb: I guess we should wait until tomorrow until we tell them about our new language.
Phineagrunk: Yes, yes we should.
Buford: You know what I hate about the Unclimbable Mountain of Unclimbableness, just to get there you have to cross the Uncrossable River of Uncrossableness.
The constant Lampshading in the "Epic Monster Battle" song.
Carl trying to insert himself into the end of the story as the ultimate hero.
Malifishmirtz explains why he wants to take over the Tri-Kingdom area, while walking down an enclosed stone spiral staircase. The first time he enters his voice is muffled, then he exits speaks clearly, goes back into the staircase and is muffled again. He comes out with his hand covering his mouth mumbling into it. The he says the mumbling is what "I said because I had a gag over my mouth."
Bufavalous: Mother always said if all the other kids were jumping off a cliff I should do it too.
Baljeetalous: Your mother said that?
Bufavalous: She was not a nurturer.
"Behold evil wizard Malifishmirtz, I hold the sword Excaliferb. This mystical vorpal blade was given to me by The Lady of the Puddle. Get a good look at it, for it is the instrument of your demise! (The blade of the sword falls off the hilt) Well, uh, okay. So big deal, the end comes off."
Baljeet as Legolas.
Poofenplotz as the troll that guards the bridge.
Phineas and Ferb and the Temple of Juatchadoon
This episode has some hilarious running jokes: the fezzes, Isabella's business cards, and the slow clapping.
"You mean we're not in Egypt? I thought the pyramids looked awfully stair-steppy."
An expansion on Isabella's business cards gag, later she's revealed to be working with Doof to keep her mother safe (somewhat). After Phineas's 'dirty double-crosser' remark, she hands him a card saying she forgot to give him that one. It reads 'Dirty Double-Crosser'. Phineas then gives the fourth wall a completely deadpan -_- look.
The reveal that Candace is afraid of the number 7.
Phineas and Ferb revealing the "Antius Maximus" ant farm they built, only for the scene to cut to a regular-sized ant farm. Phineas then explains it's just a scale model and reveals the real Antius Maximus just beside them, which causes the others to wonder why they didn't notice it earlier.
As a variation of the running gag where a bird flies into Phineas and Ferb's invention, a fly crashes into the regular-sized ant farm.
“You know what I like about our friends? We say things like, ‘We’re going to douse you in ant pheromones’, and they’re just like, ‘Okay, whatever.’ They’re so cool.”
"Oh, like you've never tampered with the delicately-balanced yet awesome forces of nature."
The Remains of the Platypus
The entire In Medias Res begining. How does it start? We've got a Doofensmirtz in his underwear (with an evil jingle to go with it), Perry the Butler spinning a giant hamster wheel, Karl locked up in a cage and dressed as a squirrel, a bunch of Buckingham guards and a midget dressed up as an alien dancing to techno music, a strangely bloated Monogram, and Linda delivering Perry's hat to Doof's apartment, reflecting that things couldn't get any weirder.
When Carl dressed as a squirrel is caged by Doofensmirtz, he uses the metaphor of it being like a delivery man dropping a bunch of assorted cheeses on his lawn. When an actual delivery man does just that, Phineas remarks that it's like "a caged guy in a squirrel costume". Both note that they are strange metaphors, but they're standing by them.
The Fire Side Girls are getting their Flying Delivery Patches again, prompting some delicious snark among them.
All of Buford's cheese puns were so gouda.
Two words: Bloated. Monogram.
Mom's in the House
One highlight of this episode is near the end, when one of Doofenshmirtz' extra heads falls off the building and on to the street below. As it questions why it couldn't have disappeared in a puff of smoke before it landed, this happens:
Extra Doof head: Curse you Pe—
(The head poofs out of existence)
Doof looking from above: Well now we'll never get to know what it had to say!!!
Candace trying to explain herself to Stacy and completely messing up the phrase.
The fact that the lyrics to the "Perrytronic" song are largely about how it can't literally turn into anything.
Perry The Actorpus
Major Monogram giving Perry Puppy-Dog Eyes as he asks him to help Agent S, followed by him lampshading that he can't hold his eyes that way any longer.
Doofenshmirtz making derogatory remarks about big bushy mustaches while speaking to Monogram.
Candace giving a calm, inspirational speech after noticing Phineas and Ferb's project about being mature and overcoming her desire to bust her brothers, only to end it on the note that she's going to bust them anyway without changing tact. The others at the "Stop the Busting" workshop don't realize what she actually said until she leaves and gives her their full support.
The "Half a Day" montage showing how Phineas and Ferb spend their time with Perry, including Ferb holding up Perry so Perry can throw a frisbee back to Phineas with his mouth, followed by Phineas catching the frisbee with his mouth.
Doofenshmirtz's regular traps not working on Sergei the Snail, due to Agent S being either small enough to slip through them or sticking to trapdoors with its slime.
Bully Bromance Breakup
Phineas slowly going into a Heroic BSOD as Baljeet denies him the opportunity to invent something. Especially the part where they were mountain climbing.
Ferb dropping his blueprints in horror when Baljeet first announces that no inventions would be used.
The relief it gives Phineas and Ferb when they finally conquer the mountain and have permission to make something.
Isabella: Phineas, go!
Phineas: ICE CHALET!!! (runs off at the speed of light)
Ferb: If we hadn't been able to invent something soon, I was going to scream.
And just a little bit later:
Isabella: You need to pace yourself... you're gonna get the bends or something.
When they're in the ice chalet:
Isabella: How are you feeling, Phineas?
Phineas:(relaxing in a hot tub made of ice) Comin' down now, comin' down.
The Doonkelberry Imperative
The 'Druselstein Driving Test Waltz' portion. Doofenshmirtz's driving and Perry's reaction made the whole episode.
Adding to it is Perry being so scared for his life that he secures himself with several extra seatbelts and later writes out his will.
Monogram's talking letter. Especially seeing Perry's reaction to it.
When Vanessa takes Candace to the Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc.! building, she does the jingle.
While the tune may be cute and friendly, the lyrics are anything but:
Doo-doo-doo-doo-destroy your enemies/La-la-la-la-let's bring them to their knees/We're going to war!
Candace: Mom, look! I'm in mortal danger! Say hi, Ferb!
The Star Wars-esq beginning, lampshading that the trailer seen in Chronicles of Meap was meant as a joke but everyone took it seriously. At the end of the episode they show another trailer for another episode they have no intention of making.
Since the writers were more or less forced to incorporate the seemingly unrelated scenes from the first trailer, some pretty priceless scenes were made. Those scenes savored how contrivedly incorporated they are. Special mention goes to Perry's mission briefing.
Major Monogram: I want your hat on my desk!...Cuz it rains a lot in Seattle, and we want to spray it with this cool new waterproofing treatment.
All of the jokes about how much it rains in the northwest. Anybody who lives there can shamelessly tell you that they're absolutely true.
"How will we know when we get to Seattle?" ~cue driving rain and grunge music~
Linda's French lesson telling her basically all the things Candace would be telling her at that moment, complete with her lampshading it, asking when those sentences would ever turn up in a conversation.
Cute Doof. That is all.
But a specific part would be that ingesting the cuteonium is supposed to make someone so cute they are impossible to resist. For Doof... Well, he's cute at least.
Baljeet reacting positively about Autumn coming soon while everyone else doesn't care.
Rodrigo: Wait, you can understand him?
Doofenshmirtz: Oh, heck no. I usually just pretend he's talking about recent movies I've seen.
Perry's reaction to Vanessa showing attraction towards Monty Monogram.
Doofenshmirtz referring to Vanessa's goth/punk fashion style as "vampire pilgrim scuba-diver".
The O.W.C.A. can't refuse to recruit Doofenshmirtz based on his species because he was adopted by ocelots and thus is technically an ocelot. What really sells it is that the agency only employing animals and Doof having been raised by ocelots were both already well established facts before the episode.
Doof's Babe-inator turned Phineas and Ferb into babies. Candace gets them to their mom right as Norm's cleaning of the -inator manages to zap everyone in the room except for Candace as well.
During the song where they're chasing after the titular croc, the kids are all paired up on motorboats (including Phineas and Isabella). In the middle of the song though, they repeatedly go through tunnels... and come out in completely different pairs than they had when they entered. In addition, the motorboats they're riding on are different colors each time this happens. No one says anything about it, but the confused 'How did THAT happen?' looks are what sell it.
The Horse in a Bookcase.
Doofenshmirtz and his inner self and his inner self's flashbacks and dreams...
Not to mention the most contrived scheme he has ever made, and that is definitely saying something.
Candace arguing with her own brain. "Stop telling me what to do!"
Sci-Fi Pie Fly
Danville thinks Phineas and Ferb are aliens because they are in a flying saucer. Funnily, the aliens they meet at the end just happen to look like them!
The entire sequence with Lawrence and the boys looking for the shoe scraper ending with the antagonist turning into a giant monster, the Flynn-Fletchers getting into fying saucers with minor characters seen in previous episodes and attacking the monster - only with it all turning out to be a film made by Phineas and Ferb.
Teenage Doofenshmirtz was pretty funny, as well as his video for the film contest.
*film starts* Doof: Make me your leader. *film ends*
The end credits where Major Monogram is trying to think of his own theme song, after Perry and Carl have theirs.
The fight between Platypus!Doof and Perry had some funny moments, like when they have a break and have tea together.
Linda stating matter-of-factly that Buford has moulds of everyone.
The scene where Isabella offered the romantic dinner smoothie to Phineas has him responding that he doesn't want it. Naturally, Isabella acts annoyed, but then Phineas reveals that he just doesn't like zucchini.
Perry's expression when he first sees Platypus!Doof.
The argument that ensues in the courtroom while Doof is on jury duty.
Oh, and the case Doof is juror in? The state vs Dr. Diminutive.
Judge: Do you two know each other?
Doof: I have never seen him before in my life.
Diminutive:He LIES! I have proof! (Takes out wallet with pictures of Doof and Diminutive in a drag act) The 2007 LOVEMUFFIN Pudding Revue!
We finally learn what Ducky Momo is like - basically, Dora the Explorer, but the protagonist is so annoying, stupid and preparative that the kids helping him get fed up and start to wonder how he's even survived so long.
A show about the inability to get a character to turn around and notice something? No wonder Candace identified with it so much.
Meap Carbonated Goulash. With alien shaped marshmallows tasting like meat products that makes you foam at the mouth!
The return of the Horse in a Bookcase.
During the credits:
Narrator: Meap Carbonated Goulash pieces are closer than they appear. Meap Carbonated Goulash may be subject to tax investigation. Please wash hands thoroughly after contact with Meap Carbonated Goulash. If hunger persists after contact with Meap Carbonated Goulash consult your...
The debating club that Ferb went to, where everyone was easily persuaded by anything said.
It only gets funnier when Perry in pet mode persuades the kid
Baljeet's Ferb impression.
Phineas (Narrating): I told her (Isabella) it was no problem.
Phineas: No problem.
Phineas (Narrating): It was then when I decided to stop narrating.
Linda actually praising Phineas and Ferb after hearing their story.
During their Squirrel Training, Isabella is trying to teach the squirrels how to do Puppy-Dog Eyes. She does it herself to demonstrate, and because her cuteness goes to her core, they give her their nuts mere seconds afterward. And her reaction is a combination of surprise and 'Oh, for me?'.
When Worlds Collide
Buford's thought process is fascinating:
Baljeet: Our planets are going to collide! You know what that means, don't you? Buford: Yeah. It's like when you've got two sets of keys, and you leave one in the car. Baljeet: No, it's like... *beat as he processes what Buford said*NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Isabella accidentally reaching for Ferb's hand rather than Phineas's.
Perry getting stuck in Doofenschmirtz' Double Dutch machine. Notable because it wasn't even a trap.
This is Fridge Brilliance at its finest. At first, you're enjoying the song, and then you realize their minds were wiped. Phineas proceeds to say the quote above, and you laugh. And then, several hours later, you realize Isabella, Baljeet, and Buford were not present for that song.?
Doofenshmirtz lamenting on his lackluster scheme, and then lampshading the length of the summer.
This was actually the last day of the second summer of the series. In production order, this comes before the Hockey Z-9 episode from winter vacation. The Christmas Vacation episode came many episodes earlier after the first summer.
The ending, when Candace realised she wasn't going to a rodeo but just a fancy restaurant.
Waiter: May I take your order, partner?
When Candace, embarrassed, asks if it might possibly be "Dress as a Cowboy, Get Dinner Free" Day, the waiter comments that, no, that's Tuesday.
Candace's encounter with a fly that had been zapped with a "human-head-inator".
Buford hitting the Fly button on the tire swing, causing it to go up and eventually fall down and crush Perry and Heinz's inator.
The base of the swing ends up making it all the way to space, passing by two astronauts in a shuttle. One of them gives us this gem:
Astronaut: Whoa, that's weird— we're in a space shuttle and the shuttle program ended years ago!
Doofenshmirtz's reaction to his self-proclaimed best -inator ever being crushed: "Well, like my Uncle Boris used to say: When life's going well, a giant tire comes along and smashes your -inator. We all thought he was crazy at the time, but now he seems rather prophetic."
When Buford is playing with the control panel to turn Candace back, she ends up shifted into various incorrect shapes, including the Inexplicable Giant Floating Baby Head, and they end up passing by her proper form and having to "go back two."
Doofenshmirtz on coffee.
Which included, him designing an overly complicated trap based off of the Mouse-trap board game.
His latest bizarly named inator that has nothing to do with it's purpose. (which makes things float up into the atmosphere)
And his Anvil On Head moment: he bounces up into the anvil face-first and falls to the ground; gravity then pulls the anvil down, with predictable results.
Buford blocking the green beams of light with other objects, including himself.
Bufords attempts to sing a new musical number about his families dailiy habits, including setting alarm clocks, being prepared for every eventuality, keeping things in place long enough for other peoples moms, and what to do if you don't succed on the first try.
My Sweet Ride
Carl shows a dark side after he finds out that Vanessa Doofenshmirtz is Monty's date.
Monogram: Carl, What do you see?
Carl: Someone who owes me big time! (His face of satisfaction is priceless).
Perry bringing in a bazooka to destroy Doofenshmirtz's front door.
It's just as funny when Doofenshmirtz refuses to let Perry in, while Vanessa points out that he'd just destroy the door anyway.
Some of the "hip" dialogue, with one example being Monogram's "See you later, crocodile!"
When Doofenshirmtz drives his restored custom car out of the building, instead of going through the garage he drives right through the door next to it.
The Running of the Chinchilas... for ounce this isn't one of Phineas and Ferb's projects, it is in fact a real event between Danville and some other town.
There is also a blink and you miss it shot of Ferb screaming when the chinchillas become large. It's just funny to see him make such a facial expression in the first place.
The reveal that Der Kinderlumper was told in different ways to Roger and Doof.
Roger: Funny, I never thought of the Kinderlumper as such a crybaby.
Agent Lyla's antics. Especially when she and Perry defeat Doofenshmirtz's "social convention" trap by eating his fries.
All the Canadian stereotypes, especially those listed by Bannister when he reveals he's from Greenland.
Bannister: You think that just because I'm polite, smell like pine needles, and overemphasize my T's, I'm Canadian?
And his laments about Greenland's national pride... and national anthem:
Bannister: Greenland's national anthem. Seriously, does that inspire you to do anything other than ice fish? But Canada! Oh, they've got it all: the maple syrup, the national parks, the medal-winning curling team... and the moose.
The end credits where Major Monogram apologizes for the wisecracks made at Greenland at the end.
When they end up on the top of the train:
Doofenshmirtz: You knew we'd end up here eventually, right?
Perry's lair entrance of the week, a tree that accidentally wrecks someone's car.
Doofenshmirtz throwing a guy out of the train... that's not the funny part, the funny part is that the guy safely rolled all the way home, and through a fence, and a playground.
Phineas noting halfway through the episode that Perry is gone.
The whole deal made out of the American and Canadian sides of the train.
The entirety of the helicopter fight, but especially the part where the singer/narrator gets sidetracked by the idea of two helicopters fighting. And then the song cuts away to two rubberhose animation helicopters boxing.
Singer:...No, that looked better in my head!
Doofenshmirtz just happening to avoid several obstacles while bending down to tie his shoelaces on top of the train.
During the opening sequence, Perry is contacted by Monogram and Carl, whose video images show up on two small mirrors that come out of the rearview mirrors on Perry's motorbike. When Monogram berates Carl, his mirror phyiscally shoves Carl's away.
Doof is unable to realise Perry without a hat again, and spends a good chunk of the episode thinking that hatless Perry is "Steven the Platypus".
The sub-plot involving Baljeet making as many choices as he wishes without being affected by the consequences as a whole was pretty funny.
Also the joke involving the first Baljeet clone getting hit by a truck because he got strawberry ice-cream.
Monogram and Carl spending the whole episode inside of the house's vents, Carl even leaves at one point only to bring back his cousin.
The Platypus hunter having named all of his boomerangs, even Doofenshmirtz finds this weird.
Lawrence being entirely unperturbed at the swarm of Baljeets.
Candace's failed attempts to show Linda the Baljeet clones.
Doofenshmirtz wondering during the cliffhanger why it's considered a cliffhanger despite him and Perry not hanging off anything.
The picture that Major Monogram showed Perry at the begining of the episode, it's of alien's meeting a dragon. The kicker is that Monogram was more focused on the really tiny spelling of 'Doof' in clouds.
The entire Shawshank parody. Especially Red's over-the-top narrating and "that's the length of"... examples.
Red: Well, it was still 500 yards. That's the length of two volleyball courts, a Nimitz-class aircraft carrier, a large three-drawer filing cabinet, three French-
The alien criminals weakness to Square Dance music.
The conversation between Phineas and Candace.
Phineas: It's me, Candace. Phineas! Outer-space alien super-crooks from a planet of frogs and reptiles have taken over our bodies.
Candace (completely straight-faced): Okay. What'd you want me to do?
Phineas: Really? You believe that weird story just like that?
Candace (still completely straight-faced): Yeah. It's been a long summer, kid. What'd you need?
Doofenshmirtz misinterpreting Perry's signals.
Doofenshmirtz: Oh, well let's see. (Perry rubs his stomach.) We can rub our stomachs and, (Perry points to his mouth) point to our mouths, and later we can roll our eyes, and put our heads in our hand.
Backyard Hodge Podge
The subplot involving Lawrence having to give a speech about an ancient tribe called the Ornithorhynchans. It gets to the point where he even dresses up◊ as one!
The running gag involving people talking about Perry but it instead get's Parry Gripp's attention.
Doof and Perry trying to fight each other while blind.
Linda hallucinating about singing pies.
While the invention is being constructed, Phineas decides to shrink a parachute to use as a sweatshirt, and enlarge a sweatshirt to use as a parachute.
Isabella getting lost in Phineasland again.
It turns out that Charlene broke up with Doofenshmirtz because of a tomato hand puppet.
Tomato hand puppet (to Doof): You know it wasn't me she didn't like right?
Doofenshmirtz setting off the self-destruct button in his underwear.
Pretty much the fact that Doofenshmirtz puts self-destruct buttons on everything including his underwear.
Isabella gives Bluto's speech from Animal House. And it is amazing.
Holly makes a call back to the time when Candace got 50 patches, though she points out that she technically got 49 - she only got 50 because of a world record patch.
Adyson suggesting that the Fireside Girls should get stung by radioactive bees to get their bee keeping patches.
At the start of the episode, Stacy immediately realises that Candace would be focused on busting, so she just immediately leaves her to watch a horror movie on her own.
Doof lampshading how he always gets called a pharmacist just because of his lab coat.
Doofenshmirtz: Really? Really? W-why does everyone just stampede to that conclusion? Other people wear lab coats you know. Why, why don't you say, "Oh look a rocket scientist." Or a veterinarian? Stacy: Are you a veterinarian? Doofenshmirtz: No... but that's not the point.
Milly calling the Big Idea a "grand and glorious and potentially bustable gift".
Buford putting Isabella back in the sack to carry her about two feet.
After Isabella blows out the candles on the giant cake and confetti shoots out:
When Holly asks Candace what she is doing with her phone out:
Holly: What are you doing? Candace: Waiting for things to get dangerous so I can call my mom to come bust the boys. Holly: (referring to the giant birthday cake shooting confetti) That's not dangerous? Candace: Dude, this is nothing. It'll get worse.
Love at First Byte
The ending, where Linda finally busts Phineas and Ferb... for not cleaning up towels. Even funnier, Candace isn't satisfied with this and thinks Linda is making fun of her.
When Candace learns that Linda asked Phineas and Ferb to make the lightshow for the party, she becomes catatonic and depressed for the majority of the episode.
Perry being disguised as a balloon animal... the balloon animal in question being himself.
One Good Turn
The fact that the dance of contrition was updated from the 40s into something that wasn't embarrassing, making Doof's plan pointless.
The premise of the episode involves Phineas and Ferb recreating the Trojan war in their style, yet the characters' ultimately take their artistic licence way too far, resulting in bagpipes, rock music, Trojan platypuses, Trojan dinosaurs and flying chariots with lasers.
When Phineas states he will play Paris, Isabella immediately gets overexcited and declares that she will play Helen. The best part is that she wraps her arm around Phineas, only for the both of them to feel awkward immediately afterwards.
The end credits for this episode are some of the funniest in a while, where Candace goes to a book club with her friends, and explains the Iliad through how Phineas and Ferb did it because she found the book too boring. Jeremy immediately realises the truth, though he points out nobody else likely read it either.
Stacy: I just come to book club for the tea.
MM and Carl both dressing up like Carmen Miranda.
At one point Doof asks Perry to take off his secret agent hat and put on his adventure hat. Perry then takes his hat off and puts it back on again.
Candace arriving at the party and having a short conversation with Vanessa about how they both dressed as a vampire queen, Candace lampshading how unlikely it was, with Stacy choosing that moment to walk up, wearing the exact same outfit, then deciding to change. I guess Danville costume shops only carry Vampire Princess costumes.
Stacy then wears a Scarlet Pimpernel costume, only to realise most of the teenage boys are wearing it. They really need to restock the costume shops.
Luckily Vanessa gets her to take advantage of this when Monogram spots Vanessa dancing with Monty.
Isabella, dressed as Cinderella, attempted to throw more hints at Phineas by "losing" a slipper by throwing it away.
Of course, it doesn't work, and Isabella has to fish her shoe out of the punch bowl.
The logical conclusion of Monty's swashbuckling window exit.
Terrifying Tri-State Trilogy of Terror
Doof: "I don't know how I forgot cheese was edible."
Isabella's immediate reaction to the evil platypus clone is everyone's favorite quote from Aliens.
When Buford says his grandma smells like flowers, Phineas refers back to the time he said that his grandma('s house, but whatever because she probably smells like the house) smelt like ant pheromones. Buford then proceeds to say that it was his other grandma who smells like ant pheromones.
The peek into Ferb's mind.
Candace and Buford speaking "Sullen".
The fortune cookie jokes.
Candace taking pictures of objects based on the vaguest connections to Jeremy, and Phineas and Ferb being able to interpret her intentions perfectly.
Doofenshmirtz destroys his own invention entirely willingly.
Baljeet notices the ray from Doofenshmirtz's inator hitting the yard.
Phineas and Ferb's invention literally flying away.
The Running Gag of 1903 Doofenshmirtz's proclamations being obscured by the noise of his machine.
In particular the silent movie sequence featuring this gag was hilarious.
The nod to Horse in a Bookcase.
Steampunk Doof reccognising how Swerry the Swan sounds like "swearing" after he calls him foul-mouthed.
Candace actually calling Phineas and Ferb steampunks when trying to bust them.
Linda muttering a quick "Forgive me, boys," before asking Candace how Phineas and Ferb are doing, putting her into "bust 'em" mode and distracting her from her worries about finding the perfect gift for Jeremy.
The sightings of Santa Claus that echo the famous Patterson Footage of Bigfoot, the Surgeon's Photograph of Nessie, and the stock picture of the Shroud of Turin.
Major Monogram: Carl! Stop filming your butt!
(Carl points camera at Monogram's rear)
Major Monogram: Film mine! It's a party! Wah-hey!
Isabella can clairvoyantly sense when someone elsewhere is using her catchphrase.
Buford saying "It's not a clubhouse?" somehow gets funnier every time, as does Candace laughing when people mention letters to Santa.
That little rap thing Candace sings after "That Christmas Feeling".
Candace constantly translating her metaphors into literal terms... including "metaphors" she didn't even use.
Ferb hands Phineas a blueprint, causing Phineas to turn away and yell in protest. Ferb flips the blueprint right side up, upon which Phineas calms down and says, "Oh, yeah. That's it!"
(moments later we see a flyer for a missing scooter)
Isabella's reaction to Phineas in Paris. After her (somewhat depressing) song "The City of Love", in which Phineas obliviously rebukes her advances, the whole gang meets back up at the boat except for Vanessa, and...well...
Phineas: Hey, Ferb. Where's Vanessa?
Ferb: She went off with someone else.
Phineas: That's too bad. I thought the two of you, you know, a boy, a girl, alone in the City of Love. I thought romance was a forgone conclusion.
Isabella: *growls and tightens her fist until the pencil she's holding breaks*
Phineas: Isabella, did you say something.
Isabella: I need a new pencil.
This CMOF is immediately topped when the very next scene repeats the exchange almost word-for-word with Candace instead of Ferb, and Isabella's head explodes!
"I jump, therefore I am." "I dangle, therefore I am."
Phineas and friends interrupting the 27th Annual Substitute Teacher Day... by flying a giant paper airplane over the proceedings.
Speaker: OK, who's the wise guy?!
"I hate being a sailor."
Buford: Love is a canvas furnished by nature and embroidered by the imagination.
Baljeet: Voltaire, Buford? Really?
Buford: Oh, I can't help it. Paris does it to me every time.
During the high-energy race at the end when Buford gives everyone back their bikes:
Buford: Here's Ferb's, here's Isabella's, and here's — a recumbent? Really?
Baljeet: Studies say it is better for your back.
Buford: How come I don't have to stand in line to bully you?
MODOK being identified as a "giant chicken egg with a face".
When the "relevant news broadcast" announces some bad news, it turns out to be the cancellation of Horse in a Bookcase before cutting to the villains wreaking havoc.
When the heroes' powers get swapped, Iron Man gets Thor's godhood and thinks he can wield Mjolnir, but Thor disabuses that notion by saying that wielding Mjolnir is about worthiness, not power. And to Iron Man's frustration, this means Tony can't use any of Thor's techniques like flying or shooting lightning, as you can only do that...
Thor & Iron Man: ...With the hammer.
Linda's walking tour on tape mentioning a daycare center that was built on top of an ancient burial ground.
Doofenshmirtz thinking that the Red Skull's head should be on fire, before considering that he may be thinking of someone else.
When the heroes are shown inside the SHED, they're astonished that it's bigger on the inside. Ferb states that it's simple British technology.
Take Two with Phineas and Ferb
From the Regis Philbin episode:
Regis: Do you have a special girl in your life?
Phineas: Actually I do. (Isabella looks shocked) She's pretty, she's smart, she's the best (Isabella looks like she's gonna cry) She's our mom! (Isabella looks mad)
From "Doof Raps On Rap": Doofenshmirtz reading a YouTube comment that says "Dan Povenmire should do standup", and commenting that he has no idea who Dan Povenmire is, But He Sounds Handsome. (For those of you who don't get the joke, Dan Povemire plays Doofenshmirtz.)
There's this ad which is basically the cast singing about the Dodger Stadium's Code of Conduct. It's pretty standard...until Doof comes in and sings about the rules HE learned the HARD WAY.
Doofenshmirtz: If you can help it, don't set Third Base on fire with your mind. Releasing monkeys in the dugout, is not considered kind. Don't build devices that will suddenly make it 1889!
The Phineas and Ferb Holiday Favorites CD is full of CMOFs:
The Twelve Days of Christmas song, where Dr. Doof starts out wishing for "THE ENTIRE TRI-STATE AREA" and finally settles on almond brittle. There's also one point in the song where he decides to sing the original lyrics in a particularly hammy manner ("FIVE GOLDEN RINGS!") just to "be traditional". Also, Candace getting more and more frustrated as her wish ("two busted brothers") repeatedly fails to come true and giving up on the twelfth day.
Major Monogram singing his rendition of "Frosty the Snowman" while getting tons of Snark from Carl, or Buford 's rendition of "Good King Wencelas."
The extended version of Perry's theme song, a cross between CMOF and CMOA.
Well, he's lookin' real sharp in his 1940's fedora,
He's got an iron will
And nerves of steel
And several other metal-themed attributes!
His fur is water-tight
And he's always up to the fight
So when evil hears this sound, it quakes in its boots!
If you don't mind spoilers, it can be rather hilarious to read the summaries for future episodes on the show's wiki. For instance, the description for "That's the Spirit!" (as of 9/21/11) ends with: "Unfortunately, his plan backfires and he transforms into a scary "were-cow" that wreaks havoc any time there is a full moon. It's now up to Agent P to stop him and save Danville." Is it even possible for plain old text to come across as a Deadpan Snarker?
Jon Colton Barry noticed Buford, Baljeet, Irving and dad were not in Rollercoaster. this is the result. The best part is the ending where Baljeet swears. Badly
This cast interview has many CMOFs, mainly down to the cast just joking around with each other.
Vincent Martella's story about meeting Slash definitely qualifies. Who described himself as "starstruck" first? Slash.
Vince and Alyson Stoner talking about doing their characters' voices in public areas so that they can get a reaction from kids.
The girl that mentions the Fridge Logic - Candace's favorite food is grilled cheese sandwich, but she is also allergic to dairy. The cast just burst in laughter. Then Dan saves it by saying it is Soy Cheese though admitting that it is a quick improvisation done at the moment.
Even if you completely botch the online game "Bot Thwack" and get a score of 0, the ending screen will still show Doofenshmirtz saying, "Curse you, Perry the Platypus! You thwacked 0 of my bots!"
During the premiere of "Mission Marvel" on Disney XD, Doofenshmirtz did commentary on the special in the style of his "Doof's Daily Dirt" videos, criticizing Red Skull's monologue technique among other things.