Funny / Diamond Is Unbreakable Retold

• The sheer number of coincidental "Killer/Deadly Queen has already touched the X" jokes made by many participants, which quickly becomes a Running Gag.
  • The best usage of this joke is this moment, where a male Kame-Yu department store worker advises some female workers from that same store not to ask the reclusive Yoshikage Kira out for lunch, while that man is walking away.
    Male worker: Don't waste your time on him. He sucks dick.
    Kira: (Turns around) Hmm?
    Male worker: The guys and I hate him. He's a single tool. He's just kind of gay. He sucks the cock out of the party.
    Kira: Oh, is that right?
    [Kira throws a sandwich onto the male worker's face.]
    Kira: Deadly Queen has already left its mark on the sandwich!
    [The sandwich blows up on the male worker's face, all while the dramatic violin segments from Kira's theme, "Killer", plays.]
• The "Crazy Noisy Bizarre Town" intro has Koichi do his famous pose...which gets Old Joseph's attention very quickly.
  Joseph: I've seen this raw strength only once before.
  [Koichi poses.]
  Joseph: It didn't scare me enough then.
  • It's followed by a retake of that clip that naturally holds on Koichi for a good few seconds.
• Josuke Higashikata attempts in vain to use his Stand, Crazy Diamond, to heal his deceased grandfather, Ryohei Higashikata. Mood Whiplash ensues during this sad moment.
  Jotaro Kujo: No amount of compassion or love could ever bring him back.
  [Sad violin music begins to play.]
  Jotaro: Not even Stands have that power. And I base that on absolutely nothing.
• Twofold during Okuyasu Nijimura's introduction.
  • He warns Josuke to prepare himself for a fight, but when he manifests his Stand, The Hand, it accidentally, bloodily impales Okuyasu through the chest. Cue an offscreen Joseph Joestar shouting Kakyoin's name.
  • Then this gag occurs not long afterwards:
    Okuyasu: Behold The Hand!
    [A severed hand is thrown onto the ground, in front of Josuke.]
    Josuke: That's so freaky!
  • Keicho decides to keep his brother, Okuyasu, in check...
    Keicho: Let me remind you that this isn't a game, Okuyasu!
    [Cut to Okuyasu's Eyes of Heaven render.]
    Game!Okuyasu: That's not fair at all!
• Instead of Yukako Yamigishi, Koichi Hirose sees good old Ralof at his window instead, happy to see that he's finally awake.
• "Cock and ball torture, from Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia..."
  • For bonus points, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is often credited for introducing people to music they wouldn't have heard otherwise. The CBT meme does the same thing with Chicago's "Old Days". In other words, it's the textbook definition of a JoJo reference.
• Right as Josuke sits down on the chair thoughtfully readied for him by Tonio, Kira hits the switch, sending a randomly nearby Caesar flying into a hill, along with a Koopa castle that quickly lands on him.

  Joseph: CAEEEEEESAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR
  Josuke: You're acting weird, man.

• Okuyasu gushes about Tonio's spaghetti being as good as a Simon & Garfunkel act. Cue a photoshop of The Rock and I Am A Rock with a brief snippet of the latter's namesake.
• The scene with Tomoko interrupting Josuke as he plays his video game gets interpreted in several different ways. CommanderN's version is Josuke fighting Sans, Total Schism's shows Josuke watching Revenge Ofthe Sith and is at the "Hello there!" scene (with a Shout-Out to the r/PrequelMemes subreddit thrown in), another portrays Josuke as a stereotypical gamer trying for a Fortnite montage and yet one more by CrowMan ManCrow features the decidedly not worksafe Wolf Girl With You (a h-game starring Liru). Each time, Tomoko screws him up.
• Jotaro talks to Josuke, Okuyasu and Koichi about a new visitor coming to Morioh.
  Jotaro: Our guest of honour is arriving at the port of Morioh at noon today.
  Koichi: Huh?
  Tim Allen: Wheh?
  Okuyasu: Just who is this someone?
  [Dio Brando comes into frame, with him being in the iconic pose as he exclaimed "KONO DIO DA!", before his face changes to a young Joseph.]
  Joseph: KONO JOJO DA!^Translation "It was I, JoJo!" in Japanese.
• Jotaro pays a visit to the imprisoned Akira Otoishi.
  Jotaro: You can try using your Stand if you want.
  Akira: Y-you can't lay a finger on me while I'm in here!
  [Cue Jotaro using his Stand, Star Platinum, to bend the iron bars open.]
  Jotaro: ALL RIGHT, BASTARD! DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU!
  [Cut to the outside of the prison, as a No-Holds-Barred Beatdown occurs while Akira Screams Like a Little Girl.]
  • Beforehand, it's revealed what Akira used a Stand Bow and Arrow for, which got him arrested. He stole many things, like V-coins, a Mulan Szechuan sauce packet, and an N-word pass.
• What does Joseph do when he sees an invisible Shizuka losing control of her Stand "Achtung Baby" and at the mercy of a hungry dog?
  Joseph: HERMIT PURPLE AND HAMON!
  Josuke: Drop the baby!
  Joseph: OH NO!
  [Poor Shizuka ends up quickly disintegrating into nothing because of the Hamon.]
  • Immediately afterwards, Joseph realises that the kid is naked, because he is holding her. Cue the FBI bursting down a door, Joseph loudly screaming and running away, all while a police van and Josuke pursuits him. While this happens, Josuke is wielding Joseph's cane and wearing a FBI hat, and batta's "Chase" plays in the background.
  • Joseph decides to apply makeup on Shizuka, so that she can be fully seen. The design he used for the baby's face is the hilarious thing, as it turns out to be Joaquin Phoenix's Joker face paint. The cherry on top is Josuke's reaction, claiming that Joseph is "doing society a big favour".
• When a bookcase falls onto Rohan Kishibe, it immediately cuts to young Joseph tearfully screaming Caesar Zeppeli's name.
• The ghost of Reimi Sugimoto advises Rohan and Koichi to leave her alley by walking away without looking back. Even though she believes it will be easy, Joseph Joestar doesn't think it is. And when the two begin their walk, Koichi feels a dark presence behind him... which turns out to be Boo and Bruno Bucciarati. Bucciarati proceeds to lick Koichi's hair .
• Shigekiyo "Shigechi" Yangu's introduction, with him initially being seen as towering over both Josuke and Okuyasu, has "Feuerroter Pfeil und Bogen" playing over it. And the volume is suddenly raised to maximum when it cuts to the man himself.
• Yukako is excited when Koichi notices her recently altered face, with her squeals in joy looped. This resembles the sound of a Morioh ambulance siren, at which point the vehicle ends up reversing towards her.
  • It appears that Koichi and Yukako will finally have their first kiss... but then Rohan steals this moment from her. Literally, with his lips.
• As if mandated by law, two of English Dub Kira's mentions of Morioh have been sentence mixed with, what else, "Duwang". chew.
• Kira has a hard time trying to reclaim his severed hand from Shigechi at the Budôgaoka middle school's storage room, as seen by his precision f-strikes.
  Kira: Fortune has smiled down on you, Shigechi. Had you peed inside, my only recourse would have been to SHIT.
  [Just as Kira is about to reach for the St. Gentleman's bag containing the hand...]
  Kira: Whoa!
  [Kira witnesses Josuke and Okuyasu entering the storage room by climbing through its windows.]
  Kira (Thoughts): What the- Why are they here?! I thought these two were blowing up!
  [Cut to Kira hiding in one of the vaulting boxes.]
  Kira (Thoughts): Now what do I do? *Beep* one of them would be a walk in the park. I can't SHIT!
• Kira attempts to detail his biography to Shigechi as per the meme, but it doesn't quite work out. Then it leads to Kira turning into Mikitaka who details his biography to Shigechi. And then that gets thrown back by a happy Shigechi gleefully regaling Kira with his biography. Biography Fu!
• After being hit by one explosion, Shigechi is bleeding to death, so Kira decides to explain why he did that.
  Kira: I can't allow a single living soul to know the rock-hard c*** of Yoshikage Kira. You're too ugly. You have to die. I'm sorry. Those are the Minecraft rules. Don't look at me, I don't make it up. You ugly, you die.
• An attempt to reassure Okuyasu doesn't work out.
  Okuyasu: Damn it! It's All My Fault!
  Jotaro: No, Okuyasu. [Yoshihiro Kira] simply outsmarted us.
  Okuyasu: Yes. That's what... "It's All My Fault" means...
• Yoshihiro Kira shoots a Stand Arrow towards Mikitaka Hazekura, but it bounces off. Yoshihiro is shocked, because "no one can just deflect the Emerald Splash".
• Rohan isn't keen on using Josuke's...dice.
  Rohan: We're not using your dick dice.
  Josuke: My dick dice?
  Rohan: You're jacking off right now, Josuke.
  [Cut to Josuke... reaching down below, panting.]
  Rohan: DISGUSTANG!
• As Rohan attempts to figure out Josuke's luck at dice rolling, a spectator, Tamami Kobayashi, notices that Rohan's house is on fire.
  Rohan: No, (turns into '93 OVA Jotaro) IT'S AN ENEMY STAND!
  [As Tanami sings "Burning Down the House", Emporio Alniño briefly appears, alluding to his Stand. Josuke quietly gets up to leave.]
  Josuke: Well, Rohan, you are an odd fellow, but I must say... YOU'RE SUCH A COLOSSAL DUMBASS!
• Koichi has a unique way in dealing with a rude hospital office lady.
  Koichi: Do it, Act 3.
  English Dub Reverb Act 3: Okay, master. Let's kill da THOT!
  Koichi: ♫ Hey ho, let's- ♫
  Japanese Voice Echoes Act 3: Kill da ho! BEEEEEEEEEEEETCH!
  [Act 3 whips out a pistol.]
  Act 3: (While shooting the hospital office lady in the chest and forehead) BEEEEEEEEEEEETCH!
• When Hayato Kawajiri is in the bathtub, Kira (Disguised as the former's father, Kosaku Kawajiri) decides to join him... while naked.
  Kira: Now it is time for father-son bonding.Bond with me, Hayato.
  [Cut to the Kawajiri residence's exterior, with Hayato screaming in horror.]
• While Hayato is crying and Forced to Watch a fatally wounded Rohan, Kira gives some scathing commentary:
  Kira: The fool has absolutely no idea why he's about to breathe his last. But I'm sure he's realised that he'll never draw Trish hentai in part 5.
  Rohan: You can't just kill people without permission!
  [A click is heard, blowing up Rohan while Hayato screams.]
• Kira lies bloodied, barely able to move after Jotaro had delivered a No-Holds-Barred Beatdown on him.
  Kira: You haven't beaten me.
  Jotaro: No, I know. But he can.
  [A Morioh ambulance bursts out of the Asgardian Palace and runs over Kira's head, twisting his neck by 180 degrees. He ends up screaming like Lego!Yoda.]