SOS Pretty Cure is a fanseries by Ryanasaurus0077.Haruhi Suzumiya is not your average girl. She prefers the company of aliens, time travelers, and ESPers to humans. She also proves her eccentricity within her very first month of high school. Many, including Haruhi herself, think she has Asperger's Syndrome; however, several episodes in it's revealed that she may be more than just a high-functioning autistic...Anyway, right before Golden Week begins, Haruhi's life changes forever when she receives a surprise visit from a fairy called EVO, who is actually an alien from another world called Paranormaland. She instructs Haruhi to fight the forces of Fujiwara, and she rounds up four more North High students (Kyon, Yuki Nagato, Mikuru Asahina, and Itsuki Koizumi) for her new club, the SOS Brigade, while the five of them fight as Pretty Cure.
Pretty Cure:
Haruhi Suzumiya (Cure Dio): The main character and a slightly tomboyish girl who's very athletic and is a Fangirl for Ronnie James Dio. Very bossy and arrogant, and very much a Type III Anti-Hero bordering on Type V until an incident involving tequila and a movie shoot. Unwittingly invents time travel later in the story.
Mikuru Asahina (Cure Tempo): A timid girl and The Heart of the team. Easily frightened by terrorbytes but has been able to hold her own in combat at times. Actually a time traveler from the future, although she refuses to admit where she comes from due to restrictions on what she can reveal about her time plane and its technologies.
EVO / Yasumi Watahashi: A fairy from Paranormaland who is revealed by Yuki early on to be an alien. She's able to take on a human form and later attends North High while passing herself off as Haruhi's younger distant cousin, Yasumi Watahashi.
Anti-SOS Brigade:
Fujiwara: Also known as "that sneering bastard", he is the Big Bad and seeks to kill the God of the universe and harness said God's powers himself to Take Over the World. He is also a time traveler like Mikuru.
Kuyo Suo: Fujiwara's Dragon, and an alien like Yuki. She comes from a world at war with Paranormaland, and she tries to interfere with attempts at diplomacy by bugging Yuki later on. She doesn't appear until the second half.
Kyoko Tachibana: Fujiwara's only other humanoid hench(wo)man, an ESPer like Itsuki who first appears in the second half as an accomplice to Mikuru's kidnapping.
Sasaki: Kyon's childhood friend and the one Fujiwara's cult is pushing to be the God of the universe instead of Haruhi. This may put her in more danger than she ever bargained for, though to say any more would spoil the plot.
All There in the Manual: How does the SOS Brigade know as much Italian as they do despite being Japanese high school students? Well, Haruhi learned the language via Rosetta Stone CDs during her junior high years, Yuki had the language programmed into her, Mikuru learned it as part of her time travel training, and Itsuki studied it under the Tamaru brothers. Kyon? He learned what he knows from an Italian dictionary in the clubroom.
Aloof Ally: Cure Extraterrestre, at least until the inevitable reveal that she's actually Yuki Nagato's Cure form. Even before The Reveal, though, she does serve as medic to the other Cures as needed.
Anti-Hero: Haruhi starts out as Type III bordering on Type V. She's expected to become Type II somewhere down the line.
Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: The video store proprietor in episode 3 complains about the terrorbyte at his store scaring away his customers, knocking over his stock, and messing up his hair.
Buffy Speak: Some characters are guilty of this, including Cure Dio in episode 9.
Bullying a Dragon: Done to a dangerous Ujasukus by a Reality Warper: not only does Cure Dio shoot Frickin' Laser Beams out of her own hands (yes, she can summon Frickin' Laser Beams without a single incantation; they're just not as strong, and they can only be fired out of her right hand), she even rubs it in the killer insect's face ("Terrorbyte hit!"). Needless to say, she found herself buried under a pile of books within seconds.
Call Back: In episode 1, Haruhi mentions that on some dates, she and her suitor at the time would go see a ballet. In episode 8, she sees a poster for Sleeping Beauty and remarks that Taniguchi tried to take her to see that ballet on the infamous 5-minute date.
Exact Words: Mikuru's "classified information syndrome" at least has some use to it; she can justify Anachronism Stew for works (including characters) already created by 2003 by telling other characters that she remembers something from somewhere about an incarnation of said work (or character). What she doesn't specify (e.g. where it comes from, and that it doesn't exist yet) is actually "classified information" about the entertainment from her own time plane.
Gratuitous Italian: All over the place. Even entire lines of dialogue are spoken in Italian on occasion. For example, in episode 12, the baseball episode:
Kyon: Italiano, per favore. Itsuki: È semplice: tu sei il quarto battitore perche Suzumiya si vuole. Non è una coincidenza. Suzumiya volle che tu salveresti il giuoco, e tu hai deluduto la.
Itsuki's line can be roughly translated into English as "It's simple: you're the cleanup hitter because Suzumiya wills it. It's not a coincidence. Suzumiya wishes that you'd save the game, and you have disappointed her."
Have a Gay Old Time: The author is obviously using the word "boner" exclusively to describe the errors committed during a baseball game in episode 12; however, it reaches Silver AgeBatman levels of unintentional innuendo when a Kamigahara Pirate scores a single on a boner committed by Kunikida.
I Work Alone: Cure Extraterrestre says this in episode 3.
James Bondage: How Cure Dio describes Kyon's situation.
Kick the Dog: Haruhi does this a few times in episode 5, including when she literally kicked Mikuru off her leg while extorting the Computer Research Society.
Laser-Guided Karma: Haruhi claims in episode 5 that retaining her Modesty Shorts under her Playboy Bunny costume would be effective in shunting blame from herself to Mikuru. It doesn't work: while Mikuru gets off scot-free (except for a brief psychiatric evaluation in the nurse's office after the teachers saw what she had just gone through), Haruhi gets a detention, but not for the stunt in and of itself; rather, she gets punished for traumatizing someone even a year above her in the process. While she does admit that was stupid of her, she doesn't regret what she did (though she does make a note of doing everything possible to make sure Mikuru doesn't go through such hell in public again when she decides to do something crazy on school grounds). To date, it's the only time Haruhi ever gets punished for her antics; in episode 6, she even says that she's surprised she didn't get grounded afterward.
Leitmotif: Cure Extraterrestre has her own, which is basically a sawtooth line accompanied by a few short bursts of distorted guitar noises that sound like a machine gun and action-style percussion in the background. When it plays as Yuki realizes that Kyon's life may be in danger in episode 9, it serves as foreshadowing.
Modesty Shorts: Haruhi is confirmed to wear these with her uniform in this incarnation; she even lampshades this in episode 4.
Haruhi: Sorry to disappoint.
Mother F-Bomb: Almost; Cure Dio manages to vocalize two-thirds of the line, but before she can sound the "cker" part, Taniguchi drowns her out by yelling, "TAKE YOUR TIME!"
Cure Dio: Piss off, motherfu— Taniguchi: TAKE YOUR TIME!
Surprisingly Good Japanese: Haruhi's seiyuu here. Conversely, she doesn't dub her own voice despite English being her first language.
Take That: The author takes a brief jab at Ted Turner's crayons in episode 1.
Temporary Blindness: Haruhi goes nearly blind in her left eye in episode 1 after scraping it against concrete during a tumble down the slope outside of North High. She's cured when she first becomes Cure Dio. Also, she's briefly paralyzed from the waist down during a fight at the end of episode 3. This is quickly reversed by the enigmatic Cure Extraterrestre.
Who Wears Short Shorts?: Flanderized as a regular feature in Haruhi's casualwear. Always paired with red tights except in the summer. It's also part of her Cure costume.
You Are Grounded: Averted twice: Akari (Kyon's sister) nearly gets grounded for waking up her parents in the middle of the night to tell them something weird and unbelievable, and Haruhi states in episode 6 that even she was surprised she wasn't grounded when her single mom found out about her detention. EVO does let her know, though, that she was lucky her mom didn't let her eat dessert for dinner that night and left it at that.
Zettai Ryouiki: Haruhi once again does this with her school uniform during the winter (the stockings get progressively shorter there as the weather gets warmer), and her Cure outfit pairs jean shorts with Grade A.