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Fan Fic: Destiny Is A Hazy Thing
Destiny is a Hazy Thing by Calanor is a lengthy Naruto fanfiction premised on the notion of Naruto coming into conscious contact with the Nine Tailed Fox after the Fox makes a deal with another powerful supernatural entity when Naruto is about 3 years old.
  • A Form You Are Comfortable With: Naruto's adoptive parents Kyuubi and Yog-sothoth.
  • Alien Geometries: Daiki shows Naruto a few including "cubes with more than six sides", which give Naruto headaches to look at.
  • All Issues Are Political Issues: For starters, most promotions beyond chuunin and which genin teams pass and fail. On the rare occasion this trope isn't played straight, someone assumes it is.
  • All Your Base Are Belong to Us: Subverted during the invasion. Konoha might have repelled the invaders but the damage has some doubt Konoha will still be around in a few years.
  • Amulet of Concentrated Awesome: Hinata uses a gem that gives her complete dominance over water... for roughly 15 minutes.
    • Naruto attempts to use a similar gem to slay Shukaku but merely injures it.
  • Anyone Can Die
  • Arranged Marriage: Sasori (pretending to be his own son) marries Pakura to get the support he needs to become Kazekage.
  • Ascended Extra: Yakumo and Anko. Mizuki, Idate, Homura, and Kin to a lesser extent.
  • Ascended to a Higher Plane of Existence: Played straight for Kyuubi and later Shukaku. Inverted for Daiki. He descended to godhood.
  • Awesome, but Impractical: Naruto and Hinata can call on Youko and Daiki's divine power to basically perform miracles. Doing so also sends up a big red flag for any divine being to come devour them.
    • Naruto describes using Kyuubi's chakra as this. Not only does it eventually start doing more damage than it heals, but due to Kyuubi's ascent to godhood, if he draws on too much he'll be knocked out for several hours (and of course the more he draws on the more he wants to draw on). During the invasion he takes out the Soragakure airship by drawing on four tails and (barely) pointing himself at it before going berserk and firing a Tailed Beast Bomb.
    • During her fight with Neji, Hinata knocks him out with a seal-less Violent Water Wave but has to heal her torn throat afterwards as she's not skilled enough to do it without injuring herself.
  • Awful Truth: Kushina learns from Naruto that Minato put in a brainwashing function in Naruto's seal that would've turned him into the optimistic All-Loving Hero in canon had the seal not been messed with.
    • When Hinata is told of the result of the years of Incest Is Relative (see below) in the Hyuuga, she sums the situation rather succinctly.
    "The Hyuuga are doomed."
  • Batman Gambit: Naruto explains his using the Kyuubi's chakra in a particular way so as to make sure that the higher-ups in Konoha don't see the Naruto as a Fantastic Nuke/asset they can use when they please.
  • Beehive Barrier: Almost literally with Shino. He can create strong but short lived barriers using his kikaichou and chakra.
  • Bi the Way: Anko and Kurenai are offhandedly mentioned as being friends with benefits provided neither is currently in a relationship.
  • Boring, but Practical: The Fire Arrow jutsu is very slow moving and not very powerful. However, because it's color can be changed and it has a great deal of hang time, it's perfect for signalling team members.
  • Brilliant, but Lazy: Shikamaru even moreso than canon. Justified because the ceremony that allows the Nara to control their shadows but makes them so lazy was accidentally overpowered, making him a prodigy at the clan techniques but too lazy to do anything about it.
  • Broken Bird: Hinata
  • Broken Pedestal: Most of the village's reaction to Tsunade.
  • Can't Kill You, Still Need You: The reason the Daimyo and his wives spare Naruto.
  • Captain Ersatz: The Fire Daimyo and his family are clearly Wrath, Sloth, Lust, and Pride
    • Likewise a group attacking them is made up entirely of expys of various Fullmetal Alchemist characters.
  • Child Prodigy: The Circle of Six pretend to be this to hide their secret training.
  • Chivalrous Pervert: Kiba towards Karin. He says she's cute and kinda enjoys the attention (not out loud anyway) but is uncomfortable with taking advantage of her (since she's addicted to his charka and not him as a person and it would, y'know, be rape in a sense).
  • Contrived Coincidence: Itachi and Kisame are only found due to a patrol route changing to reflect lower manpower, thus closing a hole in the patrols Itachi knew about.
  • Crazy-Prepared: Naruto's team (and indeed the entire Circle of Six) always carry at least a week's worth of sealed supplies on them.
  • Crippling Overspecialization: Justified for the Hyuuga clan. They've become so inbred that they can't use anything but Jyuuken. Hinata is an exemption only because her grandmother had an affair.
  • Cuddle Bug: The Kyuubi is rather physically affectionate to Naruto, which contrasts with The Stoic that is "Daiki".
  • Curb-Stomp Battle: Discussed. If a god or demon really wants to kill a mortal, there's very little said mortal can do about it.
  • Curse: The entire Hyuuga clan is cursed by Jashin for interfering with his cult.
  • Dark and Troubled Past: Kin spent most of her childhood as a sex slave.
  • Darker and Edgier: A Fix Fic this ain't.
  • Deconstruction Fic: Of Naruto canon. Almost every chapter points out some sort of logical inconsistency with the canonverse and attempts to explain it in a logical manner.
  • Despair Event Horizon: Whatever Orochimaru did to her drove Amaru to this. Given that the Reibi feeds on despair, it ends up far more powerful than in canon.
  • Did We Just Have Tea with Cthulhu?: Naruto naturally.
  • Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu?: Chouji takes on Shukakku while Naruto and Yakumo take potshots at it.
  • Dying Moment of Awesome: Gai's ultimate attack is descibed as "an explosion of lights and sounds" that leaves Shinno a bloody smear on the ground. Sadly, it doesn't take.
  • Eldritch Abomination: Naruto's adoptive father is Yog-sothoth.
    • The bijuu were apparently this before the Rikkudo Sennin forced them into animal forms. Shukaku's true form most resembles a giant sand storm.
    • Also Jashin.
  • Elemental Powers: the Circle of Six has a full set.
  • Entertainingly Wrong: Given that someone with incredible mastery with water jutsu fought Gaara and Itachi and Kisame arrived in Konoha a few days after the invasion, the higher ups naturally come to the conclusion that they fought Gaara then left to recuperate from the battle.
  • Escort Mission: Idate is given one to get Sasuke and Sakura through the first two exams in exchange for guaranteed promotion to Chuunin.
  • Faking the Dead: Sasori's method of leaving Akatsuki.
  • Fiery Coverup: Naruto and Hinata use an explosion to cover up their discovery of a "dangerous knowledge" stash and and the deaths of the two ROOT agents who saw them.
  • Fighting a Shadow: This trope is why ordinary humans can't truly hurt most supernatural beings. Even if they destroy it's physical body, at most they've inconvenienced whatever they fought.
  • For Want of a Nail: The whole premise.
  • Frickin' Laser Beams: One of Mizuki's original techniques fires one from his palm.
  • From a Single Cell: Shinno regenerates from a bloody smear on the ground.
  • From Bad to Worse: The Invasion Arc. In addition to canon problems, Orochimaru uses Edo Tensai on the 4th Kazekage, Soragakure attacks, and Shukaku breaks free.
  • Genre Savvy: Discussed when Team 11 explores the ruins of Uzushiogakure. Naruto is quick to point out that his being an Uzumaki doesn't mean anything. At least a few expeditions that searched the place would have thought to bring along an Uzumaki or at least Uzumaki blood in case of blood seals.
  • God Needs Prayers Badly: All gods are made stronger by prayer. As such Yoko and Daiki are setting the groundwork to gain worshipers.
  • Half-Human Hybrid: According to Shino, the reason his clan has trouble finding mates outside the clan is because they're far enough removed from humans that few people are genetically compatible with them.
  • Head Desk: Idate when Sasuke fights Lee.
  • Heel-Face Turn: Mizuki develops from a frustrated man contemplating treason to being genuinely happy with his lot in life and a more sincerely friendly person.
  • Highly-Visible Ninja: When Naruto wants to be noticed.
  • Honor Before Reason: During the Chunin Exams, many candidates that refuse to forfeit when obviously out of their league are mentioned as having this problem.
  • I Know Your True Name: Defied by the cat god. It erased it's true name so others wouldn't have power over it, though doing so cost it quite a bit of power.
  • I Owe You My Life: Part of why the Daimyo gives Naruto a noble title and lands. The rest it allows him to keep a closer eye on the only person who knows his family's true nature.
  • Incest Is Relative: All clans with bloodlines practice inbreeding to an extent to keep their blood from diluting too much.
    • Taken to the extreme with the Hyuuga clan. Except for Hinata's grandmother (and no one is sure how she did it) no Hyuuga has had a child with anyone not of the clan in at least three hundred years. The entire clan is so inbred that the only way to possibly save them would be if every member married someone from outside the clan and continued to do so for several generations.
  • Jerkass Gods
  • Jerkass Has a Point: While she's just being a troll, the Kyuubi's description to Kushina about what Minato could have done have some ground.
  • Karma Houdini: Anko thinks Kakashi is this after not being punished for nearly getting himself and his team killed for his "criminal neglect" and "dangerous overconfidence."
    • Averted for Sasuke. Charging in to fight Itachi ruined an ambush and got several shinobi killed. Needless to say, the higher ups are not happy with him.
      • The villagers actually start thinking he's mentally unstable too.
  • Loophole Abuse: Genin can only be transferred to another team in extreme circumstances, many of which require permission from the Hokage and/or their sensei. However, any genin can be sent back to the academy with the approval of the jonin commander. Guess who Shikamaru's father is?
  • Magic A Is Magic A: Different arbitrary rules for different universes.
  • The Magic Comes Back: Appears to be heading in this direction, with Yog and Kyuubi's actions awakening various spirits, gods, and demons.
  • Magic Powered Pseudo Science: A few of the magical devices are disguised as mundane "seal" technology devices.
  • Mercy Kill: Hayate killing Amaru
  • The Mind Is a Plaything of the Body: Has serious consequences for "Daiki"'s worldview (having been trapped as a human for ten million years)
  • Mind Rape:
    • Ino is given an entire lifetime of memories in this manner.
    • Apparently, this is the Rokubi's specialty. It's stated as having driven entire countries insane.
  • Mistaken for Badass: While badass, Kakuzu considers Naruto far stronger than he actually is for taking down as many as twenty jounin while protecting civilians, not realizing that said civilians killed more of that group than Naruto did.
  • Mundane Solution: Shikamaru's solution for having a sensei that doesn't teach them anything and nearly gets the team killed? Fill out some paperwork so he can get sent back to the academy.
  • Mundane Utility: While he does use them during the invasion, Naruto's most common use of his swallow summons is transportation.
  • No Endor Holocaust: Heavily averted. After the invasion, hundreds are dead and many more are crippled for life from what would normally be easily healed injuries because the medics are stretched too thin to do more than insure their patients will survive.
  • No-Holds-Barred Beatdown: Hinata vs Neji. After knocking him out with a sealless Violent Water Wave, Hinata cracks his ribs and breaks both arms repeatedly.
  • Non-Indicative First Episode
  • Non-Malicious Monster: Unlike most of the Bijuu, the Nanabi isn't actively malevolent. It simply destroys because that's its nature.
  • Not So Stoic: Ritsuko Aburame breaks down laughing at the idea of Tsunade as Hokage.
  • Obfuscating Stupidity: Naruto and his friends.
  • Only a Flesh Wound: Hana mentions that many of the newly crippled shinobi would have been in perfect shape after only a day but the medics can't afford to spend that much time and energy. Instead they're largely given enough treatment to live so the medics can work on more critical patients.
  • The Only Way They Will Learn: Anko, Asuma, and Kurenai let their teams drink at a celebration party so they learn not to overindulge again after the resulting hangovers.
  • Only the Worthy May Pass: Subverted in Uzushiogakure. Naruto fully realizes that even if there was a seal or barrier that only an Uzumaki could bypass, at least a few expeditions would have thought to bring Uzumaki blood with them.
  • The Power of Love: Even Eldritch Abominations aren't immune to it.
  • The Power of the Sun: Yoko/Kyuubi's domain includes the Sun, which is used to fight the Reibi.
  • Power Perversion Potential: The Kyuubi offhandedly says that a few of her and "Daiki's" clones are taking "advantage" of their human forms.
  • Pragmatic Villainy: During the Shinobi Wars, shinobi mostly leave the normal population alone. Someone has to hire them after all.
  • Prehensile Hair: Kin explains this is why she has hair that nearly reaches her ankles.
  • Prophecy Twist: Apparently, Daiki can't give a prophecy of any sort without speaking in riddles.
  • Reality Ensues: A minor example but Itachi and Kisame are delayed from reaching Konoha because their habit of traveling in all weather made Itachi sick.
    • Likewise, weeks after the invasion the village is still wrecked, hundreds are missing and presumed dead, and the medics are so overworked that anyone with medical training (including vets) are being called in to deal with the massive casualties.
    • Long before either example, Anko uses this to explain why she doesn't want her students to "come at her with the intent to kill." All it'd take is a minor mistake on anyone's part for someone to be crippled or killed.
  • Reasonable Authority Figure: Homura comes off this way.
  • Red Shirt Army: Orochimaru's forces are noted as being a few elites and a lot of subpar shinobi with one or two tricks that make them dangerous.
  • Reset Button: Unlike canon, weeks after the invasion, Konoha is struggling to rebuild. Due to the sheer number of deaths and crippling injuries, rosters have to be severely reworked. Clans are working to establish new clan heads. And due to both the infrastructural damage and people being out on missions, Konoha still doesn't know exactly how many people died.
  • Revenge: One of the Fox's more prominent motives.
  • Right for the Wrong Reasons: Anko insists that Naruto's rise to nobility wouldn't have any effect on his loyalty to Konoha since he has no interest in wealth or political power. In reality, it's because he isn't loyal to the village to begin with.
  • Sabo Tutor: For once, not Mizuki.
  • Schizo Tech: High tech goods just appear from nowhere in certain places.
    • Near the start of the story this process stops for unclear reasons, and the infrastructure built on these devices fails, either for lack of spare parts or for more esoteric reasons (it isn't clear which).
  • Screw the Rules, I Have Connections!: Tsunade tries to use the fact she's the Shodaime's granddaughter to get her way. Shikaku informs her that he doesn't give a damn who she is, if she abandons the village in its hour of need, she'll be labeled a missing-nin and blacklisted throughout the country.
    • Kakashi isn't punished for nearly getting his team killed due to being "Sarutobi's man".
  • Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: The entire Suna contingent leaves the moment they realize how bad the invasion is going for them.
    • Kakuzu decides he should leave Akatsuki soon as he considers Jinchuuriki too high profile of targets, especially since Naruto has recently been elevated to what he calls "avoid engaging when possible, otherwise proceed with utmost caution".
  • Senseless Sacrifice: Gai opening the Eight Celestial Gates to defeat Shinno does little more than inconvenience the latter.
  • Shout-Out: To Evangelion, Bleach, several other anime and Lexx.
  • Small Name, Big Ego: The Hoshigakure contingent finds it insulting that their leader isn't allowed to sit with "the other kage", ignoring that as a minor village, they're not allowed to have a kage.
  • Spanner in the Works: Kyuubi and Daiki formed a perfect plan that allow them to become far more powerful, escape the seal without harming Naruto, and leave him with a loving family while they plotted world domination. Then an orphanage matron had a psychotic breakdown and mentally and physically tortured Naruto in an attempt to free the Kyuubi.
    • Sasuke ruins an otherwise perfect ambush against Itachi and Kisame.
    • The battle with the Reibi has awakened every supernatural being that was inactive.
    • A minor version occurs when Idate ruins Kakashi's plan to tell Sasuke and Sakura about the Chuunin Exams at the last minute simply by asking if the two are ready for them.
  • Spared by the Adaptation: Hayate isn't killed by Baki due to spending the night with Yuugao.
  • The Stations of the Canon: Double subverted. Naruto's team still ends up in Wave, but they're chasing a group of rapists that happened to flee that way. Likewise, Anko initially refuses to enter her team in the chunin exams until they have at least a year of experience but Sarutobi essentially orders all the rookie sensei to enter their teams.
  • Stupid Sacrifice: Daiki notes that Hinata seems almost eager to sacrifice herself needlessly.
  • Suicide Mission: Naruto is very annoyed to be given one that no loyal Konoha shinobi would refuse and he's not strong enough to let anyone know he's not truly loyal to Konoha
  • Take That: Hana and Ritsuko both agree that Tsunade would make a terrible hokage even if her alcoholism and laziness were cured since she's all emotion and no logic when she has to make a decision.
    • Naruto gets a look at what his life would have been like if the seal hadn't been messed with. In addition to realizing how many chances he had to get himself killed, Naruto, with the seal removed, is dismayed at the person he would have turned out as (i.e. canon Naruto), and how improbable some canon events were.
    Naruto: That...That dumb, childish, orange idiot would have been me?
  • These Are Things Man Was Not Meant to Know
  • Thirty Gambit Pileup: Danzo thinks Homura arranged Naruto's training as a result of this.
  • This Is Gonna Suck: Naruto's reaction to getting a suicide mission he can't refuse without revealing that he's not actually loyal to Konoha.
  • Took a Level in Badass: Several characters, most notably the Circle of Six. Shown particularly well when Yakumo and Ino are noted to be the heavy hitters in their Chuunin squad.
  • Touched by Vorlons: A few characters have their abilities enhanced after (often unintentional) contact with magic or demons.
  • The Unreveal: The Third Hokage's true motives with Naruto.
  • Unskilled, but Strong: While far more skilled than canon Naruto and his friends still play this trope straight if judged by their chakra levels compared to their abilities. All but Hinata and Naruto have roughly average chakra for a Jonin upon their graduation. Hinata (who had been doing their secret exercise longer) is on level with most Kage. Naruto (who had the most to begin with and spent even longer doing the exercise) is noted as having somewhere between Kage and Bijuu chakra levels.
  • Utopia Justifies the Means: Minato, the Summons, and possibly the Rikkudo Senin all believe this.
  • We Have Become Complacent: Naruto's group and Homura all realize years before the invasion that Konoha has this problem. Mainly, most people buy into their own propaganda of being the strongest that they believe no one would ever dare challenge Konoha.
  • Well-Intentioned Extremist: Minato, some of the summons and the Sage of the Six Paths.
  • Wham Episode: The invasion.
  • What the Hell, Hero?: Shikamaru and later his parents all rip Kakashi a new one for nearly getting his team killed during the wave mission.
  • Worf Barrage: Naruto uses a magical gem to attack Shukaku. Unfortunately, for all it's supposed power, it merely wounds Shukaku.
  • Year Inside, Hour Outside: Naruto's dream world.
  • You Cannot Grasp the True Form: Pretty much every supernatural being of sufficient power.
  • Your Soul Is Mine: The Gobi devours the soul of anyone it's sealed into. A stronger seal just means it takes longer.
  • You're Not My Father: Naruto disowns his birth parents.
  • Zerg Rush: According to Kakuzu, this is why a group like Akatsuki would never take over the world. It doesn't matter if an S-rank shinobi could take down a hundred enemies if the hidden villages can send five hundred.
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