Character sheet depicting the main tracts from the characters of A Christmas Story.
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Parker Family
Ralphie
Ralph "Ralphie" Parker
Played by: Peter Billingsley
- Anti-Hero: He can be a bully or annoying to others and his friends but we see his has good intentions in them.
- Big Brother Instinct: While he and Randy occasionally bicker and tease each other like most siblings do, Ralphie looks out for his younger brother and doesn't hesitate to help him when he needs it.
- Big "NO!": He shouts a big one of these as he gets kicked down the slide by the twisted mall Santa.
- Butt-Monkey: He always gets told “You’ll shoot your eye out!” When he discusses his BB Gun Christmas wish.
- Cloudcuckoolander: He daydreams often and imagines himself in ideal scenarios where he’s a big, grand hero with fantasy elements. First a cowboy saving his family Western-style, being declared by his teacher who acts like an English judge, imagining his mother and teacher as witches and jesters, to the mall Santa and the elves being angry New Jersey men.
- The Determinator: The entire film is about his mission to get his Red Ryder BB Gun as a Christmas gift.
- Deadpan Snarker: He has a sarcastic attitude at times, even as an adult when he narrates his own life.
- Imagine Spot: He has a rather active imagination, something he retains into his adulthood.
- Informed Obscenity: He says "Fudge" as a result of dropping the tire bolts when changing the tire, but according to him when narrating his own story, he really said the F-word.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: He has his moments where he’s self-centered but he generally means good to his friends and family.
- Nostalgic Narrator: The entire movie from beginning to end is being told by him as an adult.
- Precision F-Strike: Besides his utterance of “Fudge” being treated this way, he later says “Son of a bitch!” as a result of the secret code for Little Orphan Annie being “BESURETODRINKYOUROVALTINE” (Be sure you drink your Ovaltine) and it was a disappointment to him.
- The Dog Bites Back: He finally snaps and beats the living shit out of Scutt Farkus after having a snowball thrown at him and his glasses falling off, which every kid in the neighborhood cheers him on for.
- What the Hell, Hero?: Mrs. Parker calls Ralphie out for swearing after dropping the bolts for the tire.
Randy
Randy Parker
Played by: Ian Petrella
- Annoying Younger Sibling: He is this way to Ralphie, his older brother. He often annoys him in the way of when he needs something, though most of them are normal and justified.
- Butt-Monkey: He faces a lot of misfortune. From being mercilessly pushed over by kids while walking, not being able to move in his snowsuit, to being pushed down by Farkus and not being able to keep up with his brother and his friends when they run away from him every day.
- Bratty Half-Pint: He can be whiny and complain a lot at times, but this is understandable for his age.
- Does Not Like Spam: He does not like meatloaf and mashed potatoes and has to be convinced by Mrs. Parker by acting like a pig and smearing his face onto the plate, much to everyone else's disgust.
- Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: He is afraid of the big slide. His actor Ian Petrella was actually afraid of the slide set and his scream of terror was not scripted nor was it exaggerated.
The Old Man
Mr. Parker, a.k.a. The Old Man
Played by: Darren McGavin
- Accidental Pervert: His leg lamp paints him as this among the neighborhood.
- Age-Gap Romance: He appears to be visibly at least ten or even twenty years older than his Wife (given that his actor was in his 60s at the time of the film's making), Mrs. Parker (when her actor was in her 40s at the time of filming), and you would be forgiven for maybe briefly mistaking him for Ralphie's Grandfather. Tellingly, this comes back to haunt him as the sequel film begins with him passing away from natural causes.
- Bumbling Dad: His job is never stated and he often just goes reading the house reading the paper.
- Butt-Monkey: His heater constantly breaks and needs to be fixed, his neighbor’s dogs harass him every time he leaves the house, and his wife breaks his beloved leg lamp he won.
- Character Death: He dies of old age in A Christmas Story Christmas.
- Comically Missing the Point: He reads “Fragile” as ‘’Fra-GEE-Lay’’ and thinking his crate is Italian and exotic.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: He has a temper and isn’t nice at times, but does really care about his children and wife.
- Large Ham: He's possibly the most exaggerated individual in his family, being prone to blow his top and scream his lungs out at a moment's inconvenience.
- No Full Name Given: His real first name is not revealed and he is simply named “The Old Man” NOT Mr. Parker. Simply this.
- Plot-Triggering Death: His death during the start of the sequel is what sets up the plot.
- Tranquil Fury: When Ralphie swears, his ultimate response is saying normally “That’s what I thought you said…..”
Mrs. Parker
Mrs. Parker
Played by: Melinda Dillon (A Christmas Story), Julie Hagerty (A Christmas Story Christmas)
- '50s Hair: Her hair looks somewhat this way despite it looking more 80s.
- Anachronism Stew: Her hair looks 80s-style naturally for a film made in the 80s.
- Age-Gap Romance: She looks to be much younger than her Husband, with her actor even being in her 40s at the time of filming in contrast to The Old Man's actor, who was in his 60s. Sadly this fact would prove ruinous as the sequel begins with her Husband passing away from natural causes.
- Deliberate Values Dissonance: During the 40s having a big leg for a lamp may have been considered obscene, but something like this is considered tame today since attitudes on sexuality are more lax and understood. She goes as far as destroying her husband’s gift for that reason. He calls her out on this, even.
- My God, What Have I Done?: While she wanted Schartz' mother to discipline him for (supposedly) teaching her son swear words, she's clearly appalled when she hears Schwartz being beaten and screaming in fear, confusion, and pain.
- Only Sane Woman: She is more level-headed, has better insight of the world, and understands her children more than her husband, The Old Man, who just simply resorts to obscenities and threats.
- Reasonable Authority Figure: She tends to use fun and normal ways to deal with her children if they misbehave, and often avoids punishments unless they're absolutely needed.
- Soap Punishment: She places a bar of Life Buoy soap into Ralphie’s mouth as punishment for swearing.
Ralphie's Friends
Flick
Flick
Played by: Scott Schwartz
- Butt-Monkey: First his tongue gets stuck to the freezing pole, then later he gets beaten by Farkus and Grover.
- Deadpan Snarker: He gets all sarcastic attitude at other’s notions.
- Large Ham: He tends to scream and yell a lot.
- Screams Like a Little Girl: He gets scared and starts whipping up some screaming when he struggles to get his tongue off the pole.
- Freak Out: He goes ballistic and hysterically shrieks for his life when he realizes his tongue is stuck.
- Single Tear: His cheek is noticeably wet when he comes back to class with gauze around his tongue.
Schwartz
Schwartz
Played by: B. D. Robb
- Abusive Parents: His mom beats him for being the one who made Ralphie swear.
- Deadpan Snarker: He has a sassy attitude and pushes others along with it.
- Disproportionate Retribution: He gets beaten by his mother just merely for being accused of teaching Ralphie the F-word.
- Goofy Buckteeth: He has buck teeth to go with his funny attitude.
- Large Ham: He always yells and never does he talk normally.
- Laser-Guided Karma: He gets tortured by Scutt Farkus the same day he and Ralphie forced Flick’s tongue to a pole.
- Screams Like a Little Girl: While justified since he’s a kid, he does scream when he plays mercy with Scut and Grover.
- Vocal Dissonance: For some reason, his voice is way deeper when he is screaming in pain while being beaten over the phone.
Other Characters
Scut Farkus
Scut Farkus
Played by: Zack Ward
- Didn't Think This Through: He did not see what he had coming for him when he threw the snowball at Ralphie and how he reacted afterward.
- Evil Laugh: He continuously laughs which fits his bully character.
- Even Evil Has Loved Ones: His henchman Grover is his best friend whom he deeply cares for. He's still not above slugging him too, though.
- Family-Unfriendly Violence: His nose bleeding and the way he gets beaten by Ralphie is pretty brutal here.
- Karma Houdini Warranty: Besides finally being beaten by Ralphie for everything he did to the kids, he also likely got in trouble by his parents afterward.
- Nasal Trauma: His nose bleeds from how badly he was beaten.
- Red Eyes, Take Warning: Downplayed, but he is described as having yellow eyes as a sign of his evilness.
- Reformed Bully: By the legacy sequel.
- Teens Are Monsters: It looks like he was around 15 years old when he was a merciless neighborhood bully who threatened younger children.
Grover Dill
Grover Dill
Played by: Yano Anaya
- Brooklyn Rage: He has a flat cap to go with his New Jersey accent complete with his usual henchmen personality.
- Kids Are Cruel: He is The Dragon to Scutt Farkus. His boss.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: He runs way when Scutt Farkus is beaten by Ralphie and he scares him off.
- The Dragon: He is this way to Scutt Farkus, his boss.
Miss Shields
Miss Shields
Played by: Tedde Moore
- '50s Hair: She has a short curly haircut in the usual 50s way.
- Mama Bear: She heavily cares for Flick, goes out to comfort him herself as he is rescued from the pole, and she later tells off the students for bullying him.
- Stern Teacher: At her worst. She has an entire drawer of confiscated novelty items but from the way the kids happily line up to hand over their gag teeth, this is just the accepted price of their antics. She doesn't even yell at them, just moves on with the school day.
