Funny / The Heat

• Mullins persistently looking for the captain's balls.
  • The captain's tragicomic, resigned tone when admitting the fact.
• "Special Agent?" Yes?" "This way." It happens three times in less than twenty seconds.
• "I smell bacon! I smell bacon!"
• Ashburn holding up the pictures to Mullins, and the woman walks up behind and tells Ashburn off. "I got a kid here!" "Oh, so sorry. Wait a minute, this is a bar!"
• The hilarious spiritual paintings portraying Jesus playing sports such as baseball, basketball, and hockey for the various Boston sports teams.
• Ashburn's inability to curse, which means she says things like "bull feces" and "bull poo-poo".
  • Then when she finally does start cursing later on, she uses words like "shit-jerk" and "dick fucker".
    • Noteworthy, when she curses in a Malaproper combined with her character here overall, it is as though Bullock is playing Lenina Huxley all over again, except comically up to eleven.
• "Ahh you...oah...ah you nawt...a nahc?"
  • Hell, the entire dinner scene with Mullins' family was a riot.
    • Practically every scene with Mullins' family.
• Mullins trying to climb out of her car in a tight parking space while swearing up a storm.
  • She then proceeds to slam the police car door shut over and over again in frustration after climbing through it.
• Mullins busting a guy for prostitution, but she doesn't just arrest him, she calls his wife and tells her exactly what he's been up to while breaking his hand.
  • Then afterwards, she chases after Rojas with him in the backseat screaming like crazy, and she catches Rojas by throwing a watermelon at him, causing him to accuse her of being racist.
  • And while she's arresting him, the guy in her car slips out of the door window with his hands still cuffed behind his back and runs off.
• Rojas has his moments: "Oh, girl. You better run. Run like you're on fire!"
• Mullins and Ashburn's drunken montage.
  • Before they get really drunk, Mullins meets up with a former flame (who so happens to be the actress's real life husband) and gives him a quick, long kiss before he leaves.
• Ashburn and her "spanx."
  Ashburn: They help hold everything together.
  Mullins: Why? What's going to fucking pop out?!
• Mullins reading Ashburn's high school year book signatures, which only had two signatures by teachers and nobody else. She also shows a picture of Ashburn in her high school days as a nerd. "Have a great summer!"
  • Mullins breaking and entering into Ashburn's house in the first place.
  • At the end of the film, Mullins has written "Fucking nerd" in the yearbook...then she adds the very touching one at the end.
• Ashburn is pretty experienced at finding hidden drugs and guns - even when they're hidden under table tops and behind walls. Much to the annoyance of crooks and the force.
  • Berating the dog was great. "Really? Nothing in here? How about this: RIGHT! THERE!" (Dog whines and looks embarrassed).
• Ashburn defeating a group of mooks with a duffel bag full of grenades.
  Mullins: Guess you two are engaged now, huh?
  Mook: What?
  Ashburn: Well, 'cause... (reveals that she had pulled the grenade pin) you just gave me a ring, muthafucka! (Mullins hastily pulls Ashburn out of the way)
  Mook: Oh, shit. (kaboom)
• Mullins showing off her gun collection to Ashburn. Especially the old grenade.
  • The collection's location? Her fridge. Causing Ashburn to wonder just what state the leftover sandwich she was offered is in.
• "OK, on the count of three. 1- 2- (All the men start walking in) unbelievable!"
• All of Mullins jokes about the albino agent.
  Mullins: Are you okay? You look pale.
  Craig: IT'S A MEDICAL CONDITION!
• Mullins and Ashburn interrogating Rojas by hanging him over the edge and then accidentally dropping him.
• Mullins telling Ashburn that her brother's resume has "keeping it real" as a special skill.
• Any part having to do with the cat.
• This:
  Beth: She's wearing her classy sweatpants, the ones that don't say "Insert here" on the ass.
• Ashburn's Bloody Hilarious subversion of Instant Drama, Just Add Tracheotomy.
• Mullins' very bored recital of the "it's not you, it's me" speech.
• "Don't touch that, it's a condom."
• The man in the club who insistently tries to hit on Ashburn and her makeover, much to the chagrin of Mullins.
  • Though this can also come off as pretty creepy to everyone who has ever been harassed in a club.