Rules for the Eurovision Song Contest drinking game:
- Rules during the singing:
- Drink whenever there is a key or tempo change
- Drink whenever there is a use of pyrotechnics/wind machine
- Drink whenever there is someone on stage of questionable gender.
- Drink whenever the projections are incorporated into the performance. (Thank Sweden 2015 for making this popular in 2016).
- Rules during the scoring:
- When the scores start to come in, someone has to call out which country they think will get 12 points from the current one; if correct, everyone but the caller takes a shot.
- Drink for every nul points.
- Enjoy 2021's contest as you finish your drink.
- Down your drink if an automatic finalistnote wins.
- Take two sips if France’s spokesperson has a backdrop of the Eiffel Tower.
- Double if the French spokesperson speaks English at any point (Eiffel Tower or not).
- Drink when Greece and Cyprus give each other 12 points (assuming that it's possible; don't do it if one qualified and the other didn't). Down the entire bottle when they DON'T do that.
- Drink each time the spokesperson congratulates the hosts for a "fantastic" show.
- Rules for the Interval acts:
- Drink if a previous winner appears.
- Double if its Måns.
- Drink if a previous winner appears.
Alternate rules from Finnish magazine City:
- Whenever a song contains more than one language, take a sip.
- If one of those languages is pronounced badly by the singer, take another sip for every badly pronounced language.
- Whenever a song is about world peace or friendship that unites nations, take a sip. (e.g. Israel's There Must Be Another Way from 2009, Georgia's Peace Will Come from 2008, Moldova's "Trenuletul" from 2022)
- If the song panders to the gay audience, take a sip.
- If the song could end up in a drag queen's performance repertoire, take another sip. (Sweden's Invincible from 2006, Austria's "Halo" from 2022)
- If the song is performed by an actual drag queen, take a third sip.
- If the song could end up in a drag queen's performance repertoire, take another sip. (Sweden's Invincible from 2006, Austria's "Halo" from 2022)
- If the song is a joke or a "protest", take a sip.
- If you're not sure, take a sip anyway.
- If the song is a copy of last year's winning song, take a sip.
- If the song resembles ABBA, take an additional sip.
- If the song's title does not have actual words in it, take a sip. (Sweden's Diggi-loo, Diggi-ley from 1984, the Netherlands' Ding dinge dong from 1975, Germany's Wadde Hadde Dudde Da from 2000.)
- If the performer changes outfits during the performance, take a sip. (Things like tearing away part of a dress or growing wings like Lordi in 2006 count.)
- If the last chorus goes up a key, take a sip.
- If the performer has a mustache or manly stubble, take a sip.
- Take an additional sip if said performer is a woman.
- If the dancers are in national costume, take a sip.
- If the performance resembles a tourism ad, take an additional sip. (Moldova's "Hora Din Moldova from 2009.)
- If the song contains an "ethnic" instrument, take a sip. Accordion and pan flute count as ethnic instruments.
- If the performance contains excessive amounts of wind machine use, take a sip. (Sweden's Invincible and Albania's Zemren E Lame Peng from 2006, Azerbaijan's Always and Croatia's Lijepa Tena from 2009.)
- If the female singer's eyebrows are noticeably darker than her hair, take a sip.
- If the singer has whitened teeth, take a sip.
- Whenever the hosts have changed outfits between performances, take a sip.
- If Ireland performs a ballad, take a sip.
- If Malta performs a power ballad, take a sip. (The One That I Love from 1998, Angel from 2005, What If We from 2009.)
- If a song from a country that was formerly part of Yugoslavia is melancholy, take a sip.
- If a song from a country in the Balkans contains the word "Balkan", take a sip. (Macedonia's Mojot Svet from 2007, Romania's The Balkan Girls from 2009, Serbia's Ovo Je Balkan from 2010.)
- If a Greek male performer or dancer shows off large amounts of pectoral muscle, take a sip. (Shake It from 2004, My Number One from 2005, This Is Our Night from 2009, Opa! from 2010...)
- If said Greek performer or dancer has massive chest hair, take another sip.
- If a country gives another country 12 points for geographical or political reasons, take a sip.
Additional Rules by the British:
- If you're fairly confident the song is in English but can't understand a thing, drink until you can.
- If you're not sure, do it anyway.
- If a country's "postcard" is cringeworthy and/or your national commentator says yours is so much better, take a sip.
- If you've been to the place in the postcard, take two sips.
- Drink every time you see your country's flag.
- Take a sip for every point the United Kingdom get.
- Pass out as 2022's votes are announced.
- Or Azerbaijan, if you actually want a drink.
- Or for how many places you are above UK or below Azerbaijan.
- How many places the UK are above Germany (and France).
- A sip for every terrible joke and/or allusion to host country's failure/success.
- Drink whenever The War is strategically avoided being mentioned (you will notice when this happens).
- If you can guess who Spain and Moldova will give points to, everyone else drinks.
- Sip whenever you notice the British really aren't taking this whole thing seriously.
- Down the thing if the hosts notice the British aren't taking it seriously.
- Sip when Russia, Ukraine, Georgia, and Belarus give each other top points.
- Or when they don't, if you plan to re-watch 2014's.
- When Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Iceland, and Holland give each other top points.
- Drink when someone (including in the room with you) boos at who gets points.
- Sip for each song more reliant on performance than song.
- And each song that sounds weirdly familiar.
- And each that puts a kid in the room to sleep.
- Finish your drink if you hate the song that's favourite to win.
- And again if it wins.
- Or if you hate the song which wins.
- Celebratory drinks if your country wins.
- Congratulatory drinks if the UK wins!
- If watching the 2022 contest live, down your drink with every Big "WHAT?!" and Big "OMG!".
- Congratulatory drinks if the UK wins!
- A country ends with nul points.
- Twice if it's not France/Germany/Spain/UK.
- Sip each time you think a country's giving top points to UK, but they're saying 'Ukraine'.
- Drink twice if you think they're giving 12 points Ukraine and they're actually giving them to the UK.
- Prepare to be extremely drunk if you are watching the 2022 show, or do neither if you actually value your liver.
- Drink twice if you think they're giving 12 points Ukraine and they're actually giving them to the UK.
- Drink every time your country sends in an act suspiciously similar to a previous winning song from your country.
- Drink a sip if the song is in English and contains the words Fire, Higher or Desire. Take a big gulp if it's two. Down the drink if all three.
