History Main / LovingAShadow

* The ComicBook/GrimmsFairyTales version of Sleeping Beauty features this. The princess' curse is naturally meant to be cured with TrueLovesKiss, with the catch that anyone who kisses her with impure intentions gets destroyed. After several princes try and fail, a peasant succeeds in kissing her with true love. The problem is, his love is only pure ''because'' he's in love from a distance and doesn't know the princess' true nature...and as soon as he realizes how spoiled and selfish she really is, the peasant renounces his love, and the curse reactivates to destroy him and permanently imprison the princess.

[[caption-width-right:300:"Play me Chopin. He died before I could know him, and so he remains beautiful."]]

* A track from {{Music/Rush}}'s ''Music/ClockworkAngels'' involves the narrator falling in love, only to realize when he is rebuffed that he had created an idealized woman in his mind and then attempted to graft his delusions onto a real person; he admits this was not the first time he has done this. The song is even called ''[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo_effect Halo Effect]]''.

A sub-trope of BrokenPedestal, which is often what awaits anyone on the path of this trope.

* Zigzagged with Peter Parker's infatuation with Mary Jane Watson in Sam Raimi's ''Film/SpiderManTrilogy'', where he has put her on something of a pedestal since childhood while she barely seems to know he even exists. However, Peter's also aware that MJ isn't the perfect glamor girl she presents herself as and tries to respect her relationship choices while still offering her his friendship. MJ, for her part, was implied to be fond of Peter to an extent, and ultimately reciprocates his feelings because he genuinely cares about and wants to get to know her. Though the third film shows how their respective [[FreudianExcuse issues]] complicate their relationship.

* ''WesternAnimation/{{Arcane}}'': [[spoiler:What ultimately causes Jinx to embrace being Jinx is that Vi loves who she used to be as [[TagAlongKid Powder]] and not who she [[MadBomber currently is]], making her decide that compared to Vi unconditionally loving her when they were children, the Vi of the present can't love her unless Jinx goes back to the way she used to be, which she cannot.]]

* Nanase is introduced in ''Webcomic/ElGoonishShive'' as [[http://www.egscomics.com/?date=2002-04-23 Elliot's Girlfriend]]... just in time to [[http://www.egscomics.com/?date=2002-05-03 dump him]] so he can hook up with Sarah. Elliot's social life was never explored beforehand, and it's [[http://www.egscomics.com/?date=2002-05-04 pretty obvious Elliot and Nanase's relationship doesn't have much to it.]] Nanase doesn't know why she doesn't love Elliot, [[spoiler:but soon finds out when she falls hard for [[OppositeSexClone Elliot's clone Ellen]], who of course is a girl]].

In the character's mind, [[MutuallyUnequalRelationship one type of relationship was simply confused with another]]. This has some basis in reality, where some potentially romantic relationships are actually people seeking "figures". (Hell, who ''hasn't'' [[TruthInTelevision done this at some point]]?) They spend time with a person because he or she [[YouRemindMeOfX reminds]] them of someone ''[[ReplacementGoldfish else]]''. For example, some characters attracted to older characters often have an absent parent or older sibling. This situation is often the inherent role of an UnwantedHarem's UnluckyEverydude.

* A story from ''Giant-Size ComicBook/{{Hulk}}'' implies the hulk had a little of this with Caiera in Planet Hulk, as she reminded him of Jarella, [[RecycledScript another woman from an alien world who loved the Hulk]]... but Bruce is quick to remind the Hulk that Jarella loved ''him'', not the Hulk.
* ComicBook/LoisLane often came across as this towards Franchise/{{Superman}} back during her StalkerWithACrush days.

** This is one of the reasons that [[Franchise/{{Batman}} Nightwing and Oracle]] fell apart. She was in love with Robin and he was in love with Batgirl — Nightwing and Oracle's ''former'' secret identities.

* ''Franchise/SpiderMan'': A good number of Spider-Man's romances with anyone other than ComicBook/MaryJaneWatson are this. Either his love interests like Peter Parker or hate Spider-Man, or like Spider-Man but don't care for the Peter Parker side of him, leading few of them to really get to know the real him and be completely honest with each other:

* ''Franchise/XMen'':

** [[Franchise/XMen Colossus]] refused to see his sister Illyana as anything but his beloved little "snowflake" even after it was clear to everyone else that her time in Limbo and her transformation into a demon sorceress had changed her for the worse (it was even a factor in ruining his renewed romance with Kitty Pryde). Illyana got fed up with this and manipulated Colossus into temporarily becoming the new Juggernaut to teach him a lesson. In her own words, "there are no snowflakes in Hell." When Colossus realizes that she tricked him into becoming the servant of a GodOfEvil and let him suffer when she could have freed him at any time, he acknowledges that she's become a monster and vows to kill her the next time they meet.

* In ''Franchise/StarWars'', this is what eventually happens to Anakin with Padme. While at first he really does seem to see her as her own person with thoughts, wants, and ideas despite calling her an "angel" upon [[PuppyLove their first meeting]], by the time of ''Revenge of the Sith'', he starts to put her on a pedestal and doesn't see her as a person who has flaws any longer. He treats her like a combination of a goddess on high and a possession he doesn't want anyone else to own. The last part of the film deconstructs this idea to its logical conclusion when he lashes out upon realizing she's still got her own opinions and feelings upon his fall to the Dark Side. She isn't about to just get on board with the massacre of children and the formation of the Galactic Empire in his quest to "save her". Upon realizing she isn't just an ideal figure passively willing to go along with whatever he wants to do, Anakin Force Chokes the woman he supposedly loves above all else.

* "Slow, Love, Slow" by Music/{{Nightwish}} has these lines:

** Technically, this applies to ''all'' of the girls who've shown interest in Adrien, as he considers [[PungeonMaster Chat]] [[LargeHam Noir]] to be his true self ([[LockedOutOfTheLoop not that any of them know that]]), and his PurityPersonified image is largely cultivated to please his ControlFreak [[AbusiveParents father]]. Lila's just more extreme than the other cases.
** Kagami becomes a more obvious case in "Lies" - she gets irritated with Adrien's apparent ActingUnnatural for his portrait, not realizing that to him, "acting more like his real self" translates to "acting like Chat Noir". Needless to say, Adrien figures out that she prefers the mask to the real him, and their relationship collapses.
** The episode “Kuro Neko” heavily implies that even Marinette herself isn’t immune to this, at least not entirely. [[spoiler:Adrien has to use a new persona for his superhero identity and replaces the carefree jokey Chat Noir for a more serious, professional Catwalker. Ladybug is so smitten with this version of him that she [[DistractedByTheSexy can’t even focus on the job]] with him around. The problem is that “Catwalker” is more of an exaggerated version of the PurityPersonified mask that he wears in public than an actual person, so essentially, Ladybug is more in love with an ideal version of her partner (which is basically Adrien to the max) than she is with Adrien’s real self.]]

* "A Forest" by Music/TheCure, from ''Music/SeventeenSecondsAlbum'', if interpreted metaphorically, has the protagonist looking for a girl who is supposedly lost, only to find out she "was never there". He then realizes, lost himself, he just ran "towards nothing", which we assume is not the first time in his life.

** MJ's initial [[BastardBoyfriend boyfriends]] are a straighter example, as she breaks up with them when it turns out they're more interested in the image of her than her true self.

* "A Forest" by Music/TheCure, from ''Music/SeventeenSeconds'', if interpreted metaphorically, has the protagonist looking for a girl who is supposedly lost, only to find out she "was never there". He then realizes, lost himself, he just ran "towards nothing", which we assume is not the first time in his life.

* In one of the few non-cheating examples of this, Nanase is introduced in ''Webcomic/ElGoonishShive'' as [[http://www.egscomics.com/?date=2002-04-23 Elliot's Girlfriend]]... just in time to [[http://www.egscomics.com/?date=2002-05-03 dump him]] so he can hook up with Sarah. Elliot's social life was never explored beforehand, and it's [[http://www.egscomics.com/?date=2002-05-04 pretty obvious Elliot and Nanase's relationship doesn't have much to it.]] Nanase doesn't know why she doesn't love Elliot, [[spoiler:but soon finds out when she falls hard for [[OppositeSexClone Elliot's clone Ellen]], who of course is a girl]].

* In J.B. Priestley's ''Dangerous Corner'', pretty much ''all'' the characters' unrequited affections for each other turn out to be this. The entire play is based on how none of them really knew or understood each other for who they were.

* Zigzagged regarding Peter Parker's infatuation with Mary Jane Watson in Sam Raimi's ''Film/SpiderManTrilogy'', where Peter has put MJ on something of a pedestal since childhood while she barely seems to know he even exists. However, he's also aware that she isn't the perfect glamor girl she presents herself as and tries to respect her relationship choices while still offering her his friendship. MJ, for her part, was implied to be fond of Peter to an extent, and ultimately reciprocates his feelings because he genuinely cares about and wants to get to know her. Though the third film shows how their respective [[FreudianExcuse issues]] complicate their relationship.