History Funny / Pathfinder

* Oprak actually hands out instructions to it's troops going on on diplomatic missions that are basically rudimentary lessons on being AffablyEvil. ''Very'' rudimentary.

* Early in the "Reign of Winter" Adventure path, the party gets the opportunity to skin a Winter Wolf and turn its pelt into an item that can temporarily disguise you as a Winter Wolf. After passing though a city gate guarded by Winter Wolves in human form, a PC wearing that pelt will get pulled over by one of them. No, she didn't recognize the wolf you made it out of, she [[GoneHorriblyRight really thinks the player is a fellow Winter Wolf, and wants to ask them out]]! Crosses over into Heartwarming if the PC lets it, see that page for details.

** Liches [[VillainTeamUp working with others of their kind]] is a fairly rare occurrence, but according to the book, it does happen, usually for reasons of increasing their knowledge. However, it calls attention to the fact that lichens ally not only with their old friends, but their old ''enemies'', and the book's reasoning is "for who knows you better than someone who's tried to kill you for a hundred years?'

* Ultimate Intrigue has an amusing picture of Imrijka and Balazar wearing each others [[NiceHat Nice Hats]].

** Then 'We Be Goblins Too!' takes place after ''that''. And Paizo has continued to produce sequels (and one prequel) to 'We Be Goblins' for Free RPG Day, continuing the wacky misadventures of the goblin heroes.

[[/folder]]
[[folder: Pathfinder: ''Kingmaker Main Campaign'']]
* At the climax of the Bloom crisis, you have to kill a {{Kaiju}}-sized Owlbear attacking your capital. If you visit the capital's Tavern in the following chapter, you'll see they made a carpet out of him, and one big enough to cover half of the main hall at that!
* An ambassador from Pitax visits early on, pretty much belittling and foulmouthing your barony all the while. You can answer him with a string of absolutely ''scathing'' insults, so much he remains speechless and storms out in humiliation.
* Shaynih'a, one of the merchants who crafts special items for you, is also a SpoonyBard with a case of AttentionDeficitOohShiny. The related quest is even called "[[Literature/ArabianNights One Thousand and One]] [[UnreliableNarrator Questionable Stories]]"
* Anytime Jaethal and Tristian interact with each other, it invariably degenerates into them slinging backhanded compliments and straight insults at each other, still while maintaining their usual calm demeanors. You can interpret this in [[TranquilFury multiple]] [[VitriolicBestBuds ways]].
* One encounter in the third chapter lets you join a tribe of Goblins for a feast. At the end, you're able to compose a war song for them by finishing their lines. They go along with whatever you suggest as long as you don't straight insult them. They also offer up a GargleBlaster - failing the Constitution check there ends the event.
* There's also the Goblin Village, which features quite a few {{Ineffectual Sympathetic Villain}}s:
** A "questes" giver who wants you to [[SchmuckBait feed its pet hydra]], who you can either claim is NotWorthKilling or kill him for the deception afterward.
** A goblin who continually taunts you into a bunch of traps - catching up to him prompts him to [[ImplausibleDeniability pass it off as]] a SecretTestOfCharacter, and you can again decide whether to spare him or kill him.
** And finally, [[TheLastOfTheseIsNotLikeTheOthers a Goblin Merchant]], who offers [[AdamSmithHatesYourGuts vastly overpriced items]] including a Masterwork Club that costs 123457 gold.
** If you bring Jaethal to the Goblin Village, you get to watch [[TheStoic her]] grow increasingly more frustrated with their antics, to the point that at the end she's ready to just be ''done''.
--->'''Jaethal:''' ''(if you agree to the "questes" giver)'' [[YouHaveGOTToBeKiddingMe You can't be serious]].\\
'''Jaethal:''' ''(when discussing what to do with the survivors)'' What are you waiting for? Kill these miscreants, and let's move on. I'm fed up with this garbage heap.
* The Inconsequential Debates, from start to finish:
** The signs for the rules are cursed, resulting in [[BalefulPolymorph Jubilost being turned into a frog]], a paladin of Iomedae being stuck [[InherentlyFunnyWords replacing random words with "tentacles"]], and a kobold only escaping being [[NoIndoorVoice forced to scream randomly]] because he can't read and so asked someone else to read the rules for him.
** The kobold competitor is utterly obsessed with becoming a dragon, to the point where he just answers "dragon" to pretty much everything - including [[RockPaperScissors Knight, Dragon, Snare]].
** Also, since the rules require coming in packs of three, the kobold was forced to convince a couple of random non-sentient animals to tag along [[CrossesTheLineTwice because he doesn't have any friends]].
** During a conversation with the paladin, [[GotMeDoingIt Jubilost will find he can't help but join in the tentacling]] despite not actually having that curse.
** Finally, if you decide to use your prize question on asking the Host why they hold the debate, they'll say it's because they're bored and ''you'' [[LivingForeverIsNoBigDeal try finding new things to do when you live forever]].
* When confronting Munguk the hill giant, if Amiri's with you, you can jokingly suggest he marries her. She takes it for a laugh...until the giant [[AbhorrentAdmirer shows actual interest in her]], to which she replies with a verbatim NoJustNoReaction and makes him back off on threatening to chop off his legs. This makes the giant ''sulk'' for a moment. If you talk Nok-Nok into dealing with the situation non-violently, he first sends the giant to your capital to find a mate, and ''then'' the drunk goblins there to find a home. Valerie is less than pleased with this result, as are (likely) you.
* In an example of [[TakeAThirdOption taking a third option]] not always being a good thing, you can resolve a feud between two cyclops by disenchanting the item they were contending for (which was magically charming them into coveting itself). Doing so makes them stand around for a moment wondering what they were doing again, then one of them proposes the other they go grab a snack. And conveniently enough, there are a few juicy humanoids nearby. As in, [[OhCrap you]].
* During the Rushlight Tournament, one of the bards recounts a tale of battling monsters...mousing over the word "Fearsome monster" opens a tooltip that simply says "[[Memes/DungeonsAndDragons Gazebo]]".
* From one of Linzi's random quips:
--> "Linzi the Illustrious? Linzi the...Magnificent? Something more simple like...Linzi the Great? Heh...perhaps [[LampshadeHanging Linzi the Indecisive]]"
** And in the final page of the game's epilogue, [[BrickJoke she calls herself "Linzi-who-never-chose-a-pretty-nickname"]].
* At a certain point, your royal throne will go missing. Until you resolve that problem, your king/queen will awkwardly receive their guests on a ''stool''. And the one responsible? ''[[ChekhovsGag The aforementioned Goblin merchant]]''! Even better, you can make him ''cry'' in order to get an achievement - just act as though you don't want the throne back, and he'll become more and more desperate to offload the thing because no one will so much as approach him while he's lugging it around!
* Linzi pretty much becomes the BearerOfBadNews whenever one of the main crises strikes your kingdom. One way of responding to her is by growing progressively more frustrated and exhasperated with every problem, to the point you can tell her to just get it over with as soon as she enters the throne room. The line where you blow up in her face is a gem in itself. Even better, this leads to Linzi and the Ruler briefly ''[[CasualDangerDialog bickering in the middle of a crisis]], in the throne room''.
--> '''[=King/Queen=]''': "Ha. 'Fire, your Highness!', 'Plague, your Highness'...I know I can always count on your for good news, Linzi!"
* The book event as you enter the final dungeon. Made even funnier by the accompanying illustration: Octavia is trying to grab on to Regongar. [[UndyingLoyalty Linzi is trying to grab your hand]]. Amiri meanwhile is just trying to keep hold of her sword.
--> Each of us reached for the one they most feared to lose or the one they most wanted to hold on to...[[MoodWhiplash Except Harrim]]. He just folded his hands over his chest, [[TheStoic calmly plummeting along with an air of mindful detachment]].
* One of Tristian's random quips is him saying "Once a girl told me my eyes light up her world. I said that the blessing of Sarenrae will light up her soul. She seemed... disappointed." It's the [[CluelessChickMagnet genuinely confused and puzzled tone]] of the delivery that really sells it.
* Prior to the 1.1 update, it was perfectly possible to make [[NayTheist Valerie]] a [[GameplayAndStorySegregation Paladin of Shelyn]].
* If you have Octavia in your party when confronting Tsanna, after Tsanna talks about the wild mating rituals Lamashtu cultists undergo to make lots of babies, Octavia will pipe up that followers of Calistria get to have just as much fun but with fewer tentacles involved. This results in Tsanna getting defensive and talking up how they have ''primordial wisdom'' wild sex versus Calistria followers having ''frivolous'' sex... which if Valerie is also in your party, then leads Val to awkwardly protest:
-->'''Valerie:''' "[[TooMuchInformation Could we please skip the theological debate over which cult has better orgies?"]]
* Amiri is pretty funny herself, if only due to her sheer directness. She approaches almost ''LightNovel/GoblinSlayer'' levels of focus on 'killing monsters.' Also, there's this bit at the PC's coronation:
-->'''Linzi:''' My fellow citizens! I hereby introduce HelloInsertNameHere, your King/Queen and your undisputed leader! Now s/he stands before you, ready to accept your will! Everyone who has gathered here--are you ready to swear fealty to your new ruler?\\
'''Ekundayo:''' I swear.\\
'''Citizen:''' Erastil save the King/Queen!\\
'''Citizen:''' Hail to the King/Queen!\\
'''Citizen:''' We pledge our loyalty!\\
'''Amiri:''' [[MoodWhiplash Yeah, yeah, sure!]] [[BlahBlahBlah How much longer are you going to wag your tongues?]] [[BigEater It's time we start feasting in the chieftain's name!]]
* Speaking of the coronation, some of the evil options for the PC's speech are pure BlackComedy compared to the other ones:
-->'''Linzi:''' Will you honor the old ways and traditions, which spread throughout these lands long before your time, and will you abide its laws, which all accept?\\
'''ChaoticEvil PC:''' Laws? I don't give a fig about laws. [[IAmTheTrope I am the power and I am the law]]: [[ForTheEvulz if during breakfast I wish to hear innocents screaming on the rack--then I will hear it!]]
* Harrim makes a magnificent straight man, especially if you decide to mock him. He genuinely doesn't get it, and just sits there smiling. Heck, his introduction is hilarious. He thinks a wound that doesn't even require a potion unless he's being especially finicky, is a death wound. If he's told he's not dying? He just gets up and grumbles.
** One of his campsite conversations has him talk about being laughed at for his beliefs while positing a WhosLaughingNow scenario... only to realize that, [[TheEeyore given his personality]], he still wouldn't be.
* One of the bits of gossip you can get from Elina is finding out that some of the young ladies in the kingdom have been faking being sick so they can spend time in the clinic Tristian is helping run because they think he's handsome.
* The goblins in Nok-Nok's village start out seeming like comically pathetic {{Ineffectual Sympathetic Villain}}s, since you basically see them over and over again trying to [[FluffyTamer tame the giant monsters they find]], only for the monsters to invariably decide to eat them instead to absolutely nobody's surprise that isn't a goblin. (Though granted this perception might change when you find out [[PlayingWithSyringes what else they've been doing]]...)
* At one point during Tristian's romance quest, you'll find out that he asked Linzi of all people for advice, and she gave him a book which he is reading intently with extreme confusion. If you ask him if you can read it, you'll find out she lent him what is essentially the fantasy equivalent of ''Literature/FiftyShadesOfGrey''. No wonder the poor boy was confused!
* Talking to Nok-Nok includes a whole section devoted to him almost obsessively talking about everything about Linzi with him expressing comical fear and disgust that [[FelonyMisdemeanor she bathes herself, keeps her hair shiny, sings, and writes too much]]. You can then jokingly ask, "So no wedding, then?" to which he reacts in horror and almost vomits in response. Well, he ''does'' vomit - he just [[CrossesTheLineTwice swallows it back down with a smile]].
* If you have Jubilost as an advisor (and thus in your Throne Room), when Willas Gunderson shows up to give you the Curse of Candlemere quest, Jubilost will spend the entire conversation cheerfully roasting Willas on everything from his sanity to his academic credentials to his appearance and delights in poking holes in his story and making fun of his ideas if you give him an opening. May turn into a FunnyAneurysmMoment in-universe when the Baron/ess finds out Jubilost was ''not'' exaggerating Willas's questionable sanity and arrogant overestimation of his own intelligence, as Willas's poorly-considered actions [[UnwittingInstigatorOfDoom are inadvertently responsible for Varnhold's destruction]].
* A series of encounter areas around Pitax chronicle the misadventures of an Academy of Arts student impersonating a cultist of Charon and trying to bind a daemon, but he always screws up the summoning and runs away leaving the real cultists to die. Why is he doing all this? Daemons stole the soul of his favorite writer [[MundaneWish and he wants to know how the series ends]].
* The wizard, [[HeroOfAnotherStory Blakemoore]], and his [[Blog/ThingsMrWelchIsNoLongerAllowedToDoInAnRPG furious squirrels]], which are functionally identical to the spider and mandragora swarms, but [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin made of angry squirrels]] that he sics on devils.
* One of Linzi random battle cry is: "And our mighty leader charges forwards-- H-Hey! Wait for me!"
* [[StormingTheCastle When invading Pitax's palace]], you find out that not every guards are willing to take on a high level party of adventurers.
--> '''Pitax Guard #1:''' [[ImplausibleDeniability Don't hit me! I'm not a soldier, I just mop the floors!]]
--> '''Pitax Guard #2:''' [[BlatantLies And I'm... I'm a cook! This isn't a sword, it's just a kitchen knife!]]
--> '''Pitax Guard #3:''' [[ScrewThisIMOuttaHere Don't touch us! See? We are leaving!]]
* During "Kingdom of the Cleansed", you and Tristian go out into the capital streets to gain information about some cultists. You're supposed to be doing so incognito, but upon hearing your name get slandered by one of the cultists, Amalia, [[TooDumbToLive you can blow your cover out of indignation]]:
-->'''Baron/ess:''' [[ActuallyIAmHim Are you aware that I am the very same baron/ess who you are condemning?]]\\
''([[WhatTheHellHero Tristian looks at you fiercely]], trying very hard to maintain his polite smile)''
** Luckily, Amalia brushes your words off. Why? Because she has an obvious crush on [[CluelessChickMagnet Tristian]] and [[LoveMakesYouDumb doesn't want to believe he'd associate with the Baron/ess]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:''Varnhold's Lot'']]
* The way that Maegar and Cephal argue constantly over literally everything like an old married couple is hilariously endearing. Especially since in a conversation where you potentially roleplay which one you often side with, you can instead say you often feel like whacking them both upside the head a bit.
** [[SelfParody The game then parodies them]] when you find an illusory version of the two of them in the main dungeon.
--->'''Fake Cephal:''' You understand nothing of town planning! [[CrossesTheLineTwice A hospital must be built on a cursed cemetery!]]\\
'''Fake Maegar:''' Cephal, you're out of your mind! A cursed cemetery is a better place for a mill. The hospital goes in the plague wasteland!\\
'''Fake Cephal:''' All right, but then the castle should go in a feverish swamp!\\
'''Fake Maegar:''' But we don't have a feverish swamp!\\
'''Fake Cephal:''' What?! Then we shall have to take one from our neighbors! We must live somewhere!
* While investigating Willas Gunderson, you can seduce him such that after the FadeToBlack, [[DestructoNookie the bed is destroyed and the innkeeper is complaining about holes in the ceiling]]. Just ''what'' did you get up to?
* The BreatherEpisode after dealing with the City of Hollow Eyes sets the General against a Galtan ''agent provocateur'' stirring up trouble in the town. With the right skill checks, the peasants he's riled up will knock him on the head and apologize for bothering you.
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous]]

[[folder: Pathfinder: Kingmaker]]
[[folder:Main Campaign]]

[[/folder]]

[[folder: '''Main Campaign''']]

[[folder: ''Varnhold's Lot'']]

*** Then 'We Be Goblins Too!' takes place after ''that''.

* There is some BlackComedy to be had in the otherwise-scary _Undead Revisited._

-->"'''''Kobolds Taste Terrible.''' [[TakeOurWordForIt This is best taken on faith.]]''"

---> --''typical adventurer reaction to a rust monster.''

* ''Pathfinder Unchained'' uses an illustration right out of WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes to illustrate moral dilemmas; Seelah the paladin is practically tearing her hair out at the sight of a tree with two signs on it pointing opposite directions: "Antipaladin's Castle" and "''Burning Orphanage''". And the antipaladin is [[DickDastardlyStopsToCheat hiding right behind the tree]].

** Another picture has Alain kissing a pig. In a conical princess hat.

* ''Dungeons Denizens Revisited'' has this gem in the section for the [[MooksAteMyEquipment Rust]] [[TheDreaded Monster]].

* ''Dungeons Denizens Revisited'' has this gem in the section for the [[TheDreaded Rust Monster]].

* ''Dungeons Denizens Revisited'' has this gem.

* Early in the "Reign of Winter" Adventure path, the party gets the opportunity to skin a Winter Wolf and turn its pelt into an item that can temporarily disguise you as a Winter Wolf. After passing though a city gate guarded by Winter Wolves in human form, a PC wearing that pelt will get pulled over by one of them. No, she didn't recognize the wolf you made it out of, she [[GoneHorriblyRight really thinks the player is a fellow Winter Wolf, and wants to ask them out]]!

* Not a review per se, but on one Pathfinder forum, someone was criticising the look and attitude of the Anti-Paladin class (pictured [[http://www.google.ca/imgres?q=anti+paladin+pathfinder&um=1&hl=en&safe=off&sa=N&rls=com.microsoft:en-us:IE-SearchBox&rlz=1I7SUNC_en&tbm=isch&tbnid=rBreVTcl3QSZbM:&imgrefurl=http://paizo.com/paizo/blog/tags/classes/antiPaladins&docid=GlvHMpOpGeJWIM&w=964&h=1000&ei=sAZrTo28JcG1tweOzOTkBQ&zoom=1&biw=1024&bih=515&iact=rc&dur=0&page=1&tbnh=116&tbnw=112&start=0&ndsp=18&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:0&tx=65&ty=53 here]]) and wondering what sort of clown would dress and act like that while keeping a straight face. The following was posted in response. I nearly killed myself laughing when I read it:
** "That guy ''doesn't'' have a straight face, though. Look at him! He's stifling either a laugh or a fart. He's dressed like High King of Douchebags, ''and he knows it''. But he doesn't care because he ''also'' knows that if you say anything about it to him, he's going to rearrange your face, and possibly your sphincter. That man bought his armor at Villains 'R' Us, and he absolutely ''does not give a damn'' about what you think. His name is Brad or Chaz, because all genuine douchebags are named Brad or Chaz, or maybe Brad Chazington III, heir to a long line of both Brads and Chazes. He stomps puppies, slaps orphans, and occasionally sets fire to nuns. If you asked him for the time of day, he'd beat you to death with an hourglass.\\
\\
That is the face of a man who just ate a kitten. Raw.\\
\\
Jeremy Puckett\\
\\
PS: This post is a parody and is not meant to make any judgment about people actually named Brad or Chaz or Brad Chazington. Good day."