Things You are No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG

Azreal: I did use them to intimidate someone. That's how the tavern got flooded with rotting kobold heads.

edited 19th Jul '13 7:39:22 PM by Muramasan13

Smile for me!

COMPNOR members are not traditionally greeted with "Heil Palpatine" and a fascist salute.

Politics is the skilled use of blunt objects.

I am no longer allowed to use my laser guided rocket boosted anti-armor munitions fired from an Anti-Material rifle 3 miles away to kill key NPC's to the GM's plot.

Who watches the watchmen?

• I am no longer allowed to put barnyard animals into campaigns because of that one PC.
• Players are no longer allowed to attempt to impregnate goats while in ghost form to create chupacabra.
• Players are no longer allowed to attempt to use duct tape to create a fake pregnancy suit.

do I even want to know what you were up to

If you have to ask, then, no you don't.

Bigotry will NEVER be welcome on TV Tropes.

- When taking plot notes, I'm not allowed to look for symbolism. Even in cryptic prophecies.

1a. No longer allowed to present myself to kobolds as a "Dungeon Inspector", even if my Bluff is stellar.
1b. No longer allowed to actually play as a "Dungeon Inspector".
2a. No longer allowed to successfully disbelieve reality.
2b. Even if I can successfully disbelieve reality, not allowed to gain Matrix-style powers from this revelation.
3a. Killing an NPC on sight because he "looked evil" is not consistent with a Lawful Good orientation.
3b. Even if he's a royal vizier.

edited 31st Jul '13 4:11:27 PM by Muramasan13

Smile for me!

Try applying sense motive to read that the chancellor is actually an otherworldly monster that has taken human form. Try forcing it to work. Then try forcing said chancellor to actually be an otherworldly monster that has taken human form.

Glenn: No, no, you don't really. I didn't really want to know either, to be honest, but unfortunately, I'm the ST. I think I need to have a discussion with my group about a distinction between plans that are "appropriate" and plans that are "holy fuck what is wrong with you."

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• Players are not allowed to create a ghostly professional badminton player that died by "taking a shuttlecock to the knee."

• Just because my character wields a club does not mean I should make a club and carry it around with me.
• Not allowed to dress in-character outside of LARP anymore.
• Lesbarian*
  Lesbian Barbarian
  is not a class. Not even a prestige class. It's certainly not a licence to speak in a dead language.
• Even if the rules allow it, not allowed to sneak attack someone with a claymore.
  • DEFINITELY not allowed to call a sneak-attacking claymore the {{Munchkin Sneaky Bastard Sword.}}
• Even if she can do it in less than two seconds, not allowed to have my fiancee call out the sums of everyone's multi-dice rolls.
• Also not allowed to use her ability to convert things as an excuse to use percentile dice in every system.
• It's an advanced cybernetic prosthetic with inbuilt weaponry. It is NOT Nuada Airgetlam's silver arm, and its factory model is definitely not codenamed 'P 1 MPH 4 ND.'
• Even though fluff is important, a natural weapon used to give passive bonuses is not a 'Really Impressive Title,' an 'Aura of Sex Appeal,' or 'Swag.'
• Not allowed to use the term 'TM 87' to refer to loot, no matter how awesome the in-joke.

Mura: -flips the bird to veterinary science with one hand and Euclidean geometry with the other-

Do the world a favor and set the GM who keeps banning that stuff on fire for me, mkay?

• No longer allowed to set G Ms on fire.
  • This includes other groups' G Ms.

"Evii is right though" -Saturn "I didn't know you were a bitch Evii." -Lior Val

Deddy is awesome.

• No longer allowed to invent mecha in a Medieval Stasis setting, no matter how many twenties I roll in Engineering.
• My bard does not carry around a "bass amp".
• No longer allowed to discover radioactivity, refine uranium, or achieve critical mass by stuffing pitchblende into a Bag of Holding.

Smile for me!

Of course not, that's what henchmen are for!

That’s the epitome of privilege right there, not considering armed nazis a threat to your life. - Silasw

8. I am to immediately cease challenging NPCs to battle for their hats.

9. And challenging major antagonists to children's card games.

edited 8th Aug '13 12:50:37 AM by Ezekiel

The comics equivalent of PTSD.

• I'm not allowed to use several different forms of teleportation magic to turn a planet inside out.
  • Nor am I allowed to survive the resulting explosion.

edited 16th Aug '13 6:46:57 PM by gbrngfol

I think there's no point in signatures.

Despite the ambush feat Throat Punch gives an opponent a -5 to speech-based checks, it does not give you an advantage in a mayoral race.

However Beguiling Dance and forging ballots does.

Cannot play a lumberjack, even if the group agrees he's okay.

• Still allowed to sleep all night and work all day, though.

My Blog | My Steam profile

Can't remember if something like this is in the thread already but here we go!

• "Pull my finger" is not an acceptable verbal component for Stinking Cloud.
  • Or Cloudkill.

"Magic Missile" may not be my most powerful spell in an Epic-level campaign. Even if it looks like something out of Macross.

Smile for me!

• I am not allowed to put a cloak, a sword and some fake blood mixture in the bathroom in anticipation of the "I teleport behind the GM and kill him" scenario.
  • Nor am i allowed to add a monster mask to the combination and start talking in a foreign language.
    • I'm especially not allowed to do this when my friends are all playing as demons.

I think there's no point in signatures.

gbrngfol F'Tagan!

Warhammer 40K RP Gs excluding Deathwatch: No longer allowed to take so many Sound Constitutions that I can magically survive a Demolition Charge to the face, as well as a max-damage Boltgun round (in theory) from a non-Astartes unarmored. Hell, even FROM an Astartes I can survive a max-damage Boltgun round.

Still need More Dakka, and it's about time to start a real WAAAAAGH.

In Dungeons And Dragons, I'm no longer allowed to combine Combat Reflexes, Monkey Grip, Great Cleave, and oversized polearms to have a 20-foot "mook blender" radius. Especially if I combine that with Short Haft to allow me to use it as an immediate melee weapon with 5-foot reach to still have a "mook blender" radius.

Relatedly, I am not allowed to play a cross-dresser in a fantasy campaign. Even if my alignment is some flavor of Chaotic.

edited 11th Sep '13 8:28:02 AM by 32_Footsteps

Reminder: Offscreen Villainy does not count towards Complete Monster.