Quotes / Bread, Eggs, Breaded Eggs

Gumshoe: Any real detective would look at his bandana!
Judge: Mmm, banana.
Edgeworth: That's bandana, Your Honor.
Judge: Right, his banana-scented bandana.

"Bill-Dipper! ...Bipper!"
Mabel Pines, Gravity Falls

Matt: I hope it's a dinosaur.
Pat: I hope it's a volcano.
Matt: I hope it's a volcanic dinosaur.
Two Best Friends Play, Man vs. Wild playthrough when the ground starts to shake

Mr. Burns: I suggest you leave immediately.
Homer: Or what? You'll release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths, and when they bark they shoot bees at you? Well go ahead, do your worst!

House: Lungs, skin, lungs, skin...sklungs?
House M.D.

"It's troubling that the symbol for "poison" and the symbol for "pirate" are the same. Sure, it saves printing costs if you're a poison pirate, but what about the rest of us?"
Brunching Shuttlecocks, "Danger Symbols, Part 1"

C.C.: "Do you know what would be great right now?"
Zoro: "Eating liquorice?"
Luffy: "Punching a swing set?"
Suzaku: "Eating liquorice?"
Lelouch: "Riding a hoverboard?"
Suzaku: Eating liquorice while on a hoverboard?"
Zoro: "No, punch the hoverboard, eat the swing set!"
Some time later.
Lelouch: "Okay. So we're all clear on this. The hoverboard is made of liquorice. We can punch it if we want to, but only if it's near a swing set. Is that good? Are we good?"
Luffy: "I like it."
Suzaku: "Sounds good."
Zoro: "Can the swing set hover?"
Lelouch: "AHHHHHH!"
None Piece/Code Ment "Fanfic Mode"

Hazmat Guy 1: Lunch? [] Mexican [] Chinese [] Pizza [] Hooker
Hazmat Guy 2: [] Chinese hooker.
King City (quoting these two is a bit difficult as they speak in check-off forms)

"What is this crap?!? What are you, a dentist? Or a hippie? Or some kind of hippie dentist?"
Strong Bad (when given an apple on Halloween), Homestar Runner

Squidward: "I could be a football player, or a king, or a spaceman."
SpongeBob: "Or a football playing king in space...with a mustache."

"I get the feeling this game was made for people who like Star Wars and LEGOs, and especially Star Wars LEGOs..."
— Codiekitty, The Twenty Most Overrated Games I've Played, on LEGO Star Wars

"The rest of the bosses [...] are boxy/spherical robots, ugly cartoon humans, or boxy/spherical robots being piloted by ugly cartoon humans I could barely tell apart from each other. And the final boss (a boxy ugly cartoon human robot) not only looks stupid, he's only remotely difficult until you figure out where to shoot..."
— the same person, during a review of Gunstar Heroes

Professor Genius: I am a professor. I am a genius. You may call me "Professor Genius."
Nostalgia Critic: Well, I find that name obnoxious. And uncreative. I'm going to call you "Obnoxiously Uncreative."

Jhonen Vasquez: I needed to find an evil way to spend it so that Nickelodeon would be contributing to something unholy in the world.
Interviewer: What'd you spend it on?
Jhonen Vasquez: Just whores. Whores over on Sunset Boulevard and Santa Monica. Whores and robots. Some of the whores were robots.

"Why isn't prostitution legal? Selling is legal; fucking is legal. So why isn't selling fucking legal?"

"If there's two things I hate in this world, it's cockroaches and crying babies! [beat] Well, a crying baby cockroach would be truly terrible..."
Bayonetta, Bayonetta

I have a pen,
I have a apple
Apple pen!
Pikotaro, "PPAP (Pen Pineapple Apple Pen)"

Drover: She had pretty brown eyes.
Hank: Were they pretty and brown or pretty brown? This could be important!
Drover: Both. They were pretty and brown. And pretty brown.

"knock knock. it's the united states. with huge boats, with guns. gunboats."

The Boss: Snake, remember the basics of CQC.
Naked Snake: OKAY! Knife. Gun. Knifegun!

"Please note that Radio Ko L is uncensored, unscripted, and is not intended for children or the easily offended. Or easily offended children."
—Nightly Maintenance note regarding RadioKol