"The game is fully aware that most gamers are dickheads and if you give them any kind of freedom, their first instinct will be to abuse it. If you give them guns, they will shoot old ladies. If you give them cars, they will run over old ladies. If you give them aircraft, they will ascend to the highest possible heights and hurl themselves out onto an old lady. And if you give them customizable outfits, their first instinct will be to take off their clothes and run around the streets hip thrusting in the faces of old ladies.
Mr. Burns: I suggest you leave immediately.
Homer: Or what? You'll release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths, and when they bark they shoot bees at you? Well go ahead, do your worst!
House: Lungs, skin, lungs, skin...sklungs?
"It's troubling that the symbol for "poison" and the symbol for "pirate" are the same. Sure, it saves printing costs if you're a poison pirate, but what about the rest of us?"
—Brunching Shuttlecocks, "Danger Symbols, Part 1"
C.C.: "Do you know what would be great right now?"
Zoro: "Eating liquorice?"
Luffy: "Punching a swing set?"
Suzaku: "Eating liquorice?"
Lelouch: "Riding a hoverboard?"
Suzaku: Eating liquorice while on a hoverboard?"
Zoro: "No, punch the hoverboard, eat the swing set!"
Some time later.
Lelouch: "Okay. So we're all clear on this. The hoverboard is made of liquorice. We can punch it if we want to, but only if it's near a swing set. Is that good? Are we good?"
Luffy: "I like it."
Suzaku: "Sounds good."
Zoro: "Can the swing set hover?"
Hazmat Guy 1: Lunch?  Mexican  Chinese  Pizza  Hooker
Hazmat Guy 2:  Chinese hooker.
"What is this crap?!? What are you, a dentist? Or a hippie? Or some kind of hippie dentist?"
— Strong Bad (when given an apple on Halloween), Homestar Runner
Squidward: "I could be a football player, or a king, or a spaceman."
SpongeBob: "Or a football playing king in space...with a mustache."