Live-Action TV / Not So Different Remark

Examples of "Not So Different" Remark in live-action TV.

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In the 7th season of 24, both Jonas Hodges and Tony Almeida try to tell Jack Bauer that their dastardly deeds are very similar to the things Jack has done in his career. That it's true makes it hit home harder. Jason Pillar says this to him as well in the penultimate episode of the show.
In the 30 Rock episode "Generalissimo", Jack Donaghy confronts a Mexican soap-opera actor whose onscreen evil is biasing Jack's Puerto Rican girlfriend's grandmother against him. The actor, Hector Moreda, looks exactly like him (and is played by none other than Alec Baldwin). As they discuss the fate of El Generalissimo, the swarthy, mustachio'd Hector points out to Jack that "We're not so different, you and I".
The 100 has this between Clarke and Anya (and, more broadly, between the 100 and the Grounders). Clarke complains about how the Grounders have been attacking them without provocation, but Anya points out that many of the 100's actions could be seen as unprovoked attacks as well. Their similarity is confirmed by the fact that they agreed to speak to each other without weapons or other fighters backing them up, but neither of them trusted the other, and they both had snipers hiding nearby to attack if necessary. Needless to say, this torpedoes their peace talks.
The 4400: "No Exit" shows several of the main characters locked up in the NTAC building, including Jordan Collier and Tom Baldwin. After it is revealed that the lockup is only the result of one of the NTAC agents having an ability due to a previous injection of promicin, and was created as a collective dream in order to promote cooperation between the Collier followers and NTAC, Collier and Baldwin are forced to work together and the ordeal convinces both of them that there is common ground between them. However, Baldwin still keeps his stance against Collier and vows to catch him.

Stanton Parish says this to Dr. Rosen in the Season 1 Season Finale of Alphas. Both of them manipulate others for their own ends, and both feel those ends are aided by The Masquerade. Rosen points out that he might manipulate people, but he's trying to help them, and subsequently blows the Masquerade open.
In American Gothic (1995), one hero (The Chosen One, of sorts) has to tell another (his Spirit Advisor) that she is not so different: in "The Plague Sower", having gone too far in her desire for vengeance and justice, Merlyn uses her angelic powers to curse Trinity with an almost Biblical plague, only relenting when she is made to see how her either-or mentality and harsh, murderous methods make her no better than Buck.
On Andromeda, whenever Dylan does something underhanded to accomplish his goals, a nearby Nietzschean will point out that he "would have made a good Nietzschean".
Wesley mentions this in regards to Lilah in Angel:
We were fighting on opposite sides, but it was the same war.
- In "Peace Out":
  Angel: Oh yeah, you eat people!
  Jasmine: Like you never have?
The A-Team, "The Battle of Bel Air". Mr. Carson tries to pull this on Hannibal, saying that they both provide what a person needs in return for money, and offers to give the team employment in the future and more money than Tawnia is paying right now. Hannibal collars him, growling that they're really Not So Similar.

Band of Brothers: In the last episode, a surrendering Nazi officer pulls this trope on Major Winters, mentioning that they are both reluctant warriors who love peace even though they are very good at war. Winters silently acknowledges the man's point before accepting the man's surrender.
A great example of the "That's why I can beat you" outcome is a scene in Blood Ties (2007) where the cornered freaked-out vampire (abandoned by its sire) tells Henry that he too is a monster and Henry answers "But I am the monster who is coming out of this alive.".
Cold Sniper Jacob Broadsky keeps trying to use this on Friendly Sniper Booth in Bones. Booth was an Army Ranger sniper who killed to keep his country safe but wasn’t happy with it. Broadsky repeatedly insists they’re the same because he’s killing people he feels escaped justice. Unfortunately he’s killing innocent people in the process. At least one character in the lab brings it up too and it quickly becomes clear it’s pushing Booth’s Berserk Button.
Invoked in The Bridge (2011) when Saga runs through the psychological profile of the Serial Killer for her superior, Hans. This comes into play when he takes a minute to realize she's not talking about herself. She doesn't seem to mind (or notice, really) - though to be fair, they were discussing her when she suddenly brought it up.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer:
- This comes up often between Buffy and Faith (and Buffy and Angelus, and Buffy and Dracula for that matter)...for one Buffy has such a huge thing for Daniel Craig that she creeps the Bond fan and Camp Gay Andrew out, while Faith demands Angel drag him to her.
Buffy: You told me I was just like you. That I was holding it in.
Faith: Ready to cut loose?
Buffy: Try me.
Faith: Okay then. Give us a kiss. (Buffy punches her in the jaw)
- Spike is constantly telling Buffy this in Season 6, and while Buffy always angrily denies the idea it's clear she also secretly believes him, fueling her decision to have a torrid affair with Spike. There's also something to be said about their rebellion against typical norms with Spike constantly proving himself to be an outlier in the vampire world (souled or soulless) just as Buffy is when it comes to being a Slayer.

In Cobra Kai, Ali Mills sums up the similaries between the enemies Johnny Lawrence and Danny LaRusso in the Season 3 finale:
Ali: This is exactly the problem. You say one thing, you say the opposite. You both think there's only one side to the story.
Johnny: I know. There's two.
Ali: No, there's three. There's your side, and your side, and then there's the truth. And the truth is, you guys are more alike than you want to admit. Maybe you recognize parts of yourselves in each other, and maybe you don't always like what you see.
Community: In "Basic Genealogy", Pierce gives a speech to Jeff about them both trying to avoid loneliness.
The Company You Keep:
- Daphne claims after Emma tries to sway her from her criminal pursuits that cops and spies (Emma's CIA) are criminals as well who break laws whenever it's useful for them.
- Birdie points out to Emma how con artistry and CIA tactics for undercover deception are very much alike.
Comes up from time to time in Criminal Minds between unsubs and protagonists, reasonably - typically, any of the B.A.U. troubled any time it does are pointed to the fact that they couldn't very well do their job if they couldn't understand or let themselves think like the people they chase.
In Criminologist Himura and Mystery Writer Arisugawa, both Arisugawa and Tokie comment on how the serial killer Apollo reminds them of Himura when they first met him, with Himura and Apollo sharing the same desire to commit a "beautiful" crime. Arisugawa goes on to wonder what would happen if the two of them were to meet. This happens in the next episode, and Himura chews out Apollo for giving in to his murderious urges where Himura did not.

On May 9th, 2011's The Daily Show, Jon Stewart says that he and Osama bin Laden, of all people, are not so different less than three minutes into the show.
Jon Stewart: You know, Osama, we weren't so different, you and I. Except, of course, for you being the world's most evil man, and my unrequited love for the snack Bugles.
In The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance, Tavra points out that Brea has many similarities to her sister Seladon, which Brea balks at.
Played with on Dexter, when FBI Agent Lundy notes how his psychological profile of the Trinity Killer describes himself as well. Not only is this an example of a heroic character comparing himself to a villain, but Dexter (who himself relates to Trinity) is also impressed as well.
- Isaak Sirko tells Dexter they could have been friends under other circumstances. Dexter doesn't disagree.
In Dr. Phil, Phil invites the creator of the Bumfights movies who shows up dressed like Phil. Phil has him thrown out, but not before he starts ranting about how they both made money exploiting vulnerable people.
Doctor Who:
- In "Dalek":
  - The "Metaltron" initially points out that, being the last of their respective races, it and the Doctor are "the same". The Doctor's reaction starts out in the usual way, but then veers suddenly and shockingly into the Dark Side:
    The Doctor: We're not the same! I'm not– no. Wait. Maybe we are. You're right, yeah, okay. You've got a point. Because I know what to do. I know what should happen. I know what you deserve.
    [he moves toward the torture machine's control panel and gives the Dalek a big smile]
    The Doctor: Exterminate!
  - Near the end of the episode, it again notes that "You would make a good Dalek", which this time has the usual effect of making the Doctor realize how close he's come to crossing the line.
  - The Doctor also compares Henry van Statten, the man who had the Dalek in containment, to Davros, the creator of the Daleks, without mentioning Davros by name.
- "The Empty Child": In an example not involving villains, the Doctor meets Dr. Constantine, a doctor at the hospital with The Virus victims, who explains that before the war began, he was a father and a grandfather. Now he's neither, but he's still a doctor. The Doctor responds that he knows the feeling.
- In "Boom Town", the Doctor deconstructs Blon's Pet the Dog moment, explaining that it is nothing more than an emotional crutch to help her live with the multitude she has killed. She replies that she expects a killer like him would understand that.
- In "The Parting of the Ways", the Dalek Emperor repeatedly taunts the Doctor by describing him as "The Great Exterminator", after the Doctor threatens to use a machine to destroy the Daleks along with all life on Earth. And then later, once Rose has absorbed the heart of the TARDIS and uses it to, well, exterminate the Daleks, the Emperor says, "I will not die!" Fully five years later, none other than Rassilon himself, the Lord President and very architect of Time Lord society, now turned into a vengeful Omnicidal Maniac, says the exact same thing. Under similar duress, too!
- "Last of the Time Lords": It turns out that the Toclafane are the final form of humanity in the far future, and they have a lot in common with the Daleks, as withered living creatures encased in nigh-indestructible metal shells who seek to kill everything else. In their case, it's not because they find other lifeforms offensive like the Daleks, but because it's just so fun! It's debatable whether or not this makes them even worse than the Daleks.
- "Planet of the Ood": The Doctor compares the situation of the Ood's enslavement to contemporary Earth, asking Donna who she thinks made her clothes. She returns fire by asking if he only brings humans along so he can act superior at them, a point he concedes.
- "The Doctor's Daughter": Jenny spends half the episode trying to convince the Doctor he's being a hypocrite because he was a soldier in a war, just like she was created to be, and committed genocide to end it. On the flipside, she discovers that she's more of a Martial Pacifist like him.
- In "Journey's End", Davros notes how the Doctor turns his companions into weapons, and wonders how many have "died in his name" (cue flashback) before proclaiming he has shown the Doctor "himself".
  Davros: I made the Daleks, Doctor. You made this.
- "Planet of the Dead": When the Doctor learns that Lady Christina is a Classy Cat-Burglar who steals for fun, he acts disapproving for about ten seconds before admitting that he stole the TARDIS.
  Christina: I take it you disapprove?
  The Doctor: Absolutely. [pauses] Except... that little blue box... I stole it. From my own people.
  Christina: Good boy! You were right, we're quite a team.
- "The Beast Below": Amy saves the day by realizing the similarities between the Doctor and the Star Whale: they're both incredibly old, the Last of Their Kind and a Friend to All Children.
- "The God Complex":
  The Doctor: [The prison] drifts through space. Snatches people with belief systems. It converts the people's faith into food for the creature. According to the info-recorder, the program developed glitches, got stuck on the same setting.
  Amy: What is it saying?
  The Doctor: [translating the Minotaur] An ancient creature, drenched in the blood of the innocent. Drifting in space through an ever-shifting maze. For such a creature... death would be a gift. [to the Minotaur] Then accept it. And sleep well. [the Minotaur grunts its final words, stopping the Doctor cold] ...I wasn't talking about myself.
- "Into the Dalek": The short version is, a Dalek claims to have made a Heel–Face Turn after seeing the wonders of the universe and that life can never be exterminated. Turns out the Dalek is damaged, dying. The Doctor fixes "Rusty," but it turns out that he also fixed the tech that helps keep Daleks "pure." Cue rampage. So the Doctor tries to make Rusty as he was, by giving him some of his own memories. It's all well and good... until he gets to the Doctor's own memories of and feelings about the Daleks. This sends Rusty on a spree of blasting the other Daleks; it's unlike a normal Dalek rampage purely in terms of who he's targeting. Not a thing about the beauty of the universe or sanctity of life, it's "THE DALEKS ARE EVIL! THE DALEKS MUST BE EXTERMINATED!" In the end, the Doctor laments the outcome; he doesn't like the fact that there's that kind of hatred in him, and he'd also hoped Rusty could truly be good. Rusty tells him, "I am not a good Dalek. You are a good Dalek." It's of course, not the first time he's heard that.
- A more positive example occurs at the end of "Robot of Sherwood", when Robin Hood, having heard about the Doctor's history from Clara, suggests that they are not so different; both aristocrats (Earl of Locksley, Lord of Time) who turned outlaw rather than ignore injustice.
- Used in "Death in Heaven" by Missy, who tries to get the Doctor to use an army of Cybermen to do good in the universe, because "I need my friend back! I need you to know that we're not so different!"
- "The Witchfinders":
  - When the Doctor accuses King James of hiding behind his title, he points out that she's doing the same with her title of "Doctor". Judging by her ensuing Death Glare, this clearly hit a nerve.
  - During her trial, the Doctor appeals to James by pointing out the things they have in common. It almost works.
    The Doctor: We're all the same. We want certainty, security, to believe that people are evil or heroic, but that's not how people are. You wanna know the secrets of existence? Start with the mysteries of the heart.
Don't Look Deeper: Aisha tries to empathize with one of the people after her, a trans man, because both just want recognition of who they are-in his case male, for her as a person. He lets her have one last meeting with her little brother, but still shuts down Aisha after.

In the sitcom Everybody Loves Raymond it was indicated that the relationship between Marie and her mother-in-law was very similar to the one between Marie and Debra, and Marie often mentioned that she and Debra were similar, but this was something Debra refused to accept.

The Facts of Life. After Blair's friend escorts Jo to a fancy dance, only to try to rape her, wealthy Blair and lower class Jo are shocked to realize that boys assume they're promiscuous based on their backgrounds, despite them being complete opposites:
Blair: "Why do guys act that way? One minute, they're jumping to conclusions, the next they're jumping on you."
Jo: "Well, I guess when you come from the Wrong Side of the Tracks, guys think you're easy."
Blair: "Listen, they think that when you come from the right side too. Heck, I own the tracks and some of them think that about me."
Jo: "Boy, who would have thought? You and me with the same problem."
Farscape has a few examples:
- John and Crais have a moment together in the episode "Family Ties" where they acknowledge that they have come more or less full circle, with Crais in a cell and realizing how much damage he has done to the protagonists and finally admitting his true motivations for hunting them for so long. It doesn't hurt that they also look like the same species.
- In the final episode, "Bad Timing", Scorpius forces John to acknowledge that they both use, manipulate, and betray each other, making John admit that he has become much more like Scorpius than he would like to admit. Scorpius has a bad habit of claiming that they both want the same thing and trying to play on John's sympathies to get his help throughout the last two seasons but John is (quite understandably) reticent to accept Scorpius's claims of similarity.
- In a non-villainous example in the Season 3 episode "Wait For The Wheel". Zhaan (priestess and healer) says to Aeryn (former stormtrooper)
  Don't be afraid to understand yourself. We're not so different as you assume. Violent past, no faith in the future, and then a transformative experience aboard this very ship.
First Day: Olivia states she can somewhat relate to Hannah's struggles as a trans girl because she's had some similar things for being Asian (prejudice, stereotypes, etc).
In Flashpoint, SRU negotiators will often share a relevant experience from their own past to help the subject relate to them and recognize that the negotiator understands them. For example, in "First In Line", Parker tells a desperate father that he's a father too and understands how much a child means to their parent, and in "Behind the Blue Line", Sam Braddock tells a former soldier suffering from Survivor Guilt that he struggled with the same feelings due to losing his best friend in Afghanistan in a Friendly Fire incident.
Forever: The Older Immortal Adam believes Henry will eventually become a sociopath, like him. He repeatedly claims he was once "a good and decent man" like Henry and that he, too, died for the first time trying to save someone's life.
Predictably occurs whenever Frasier and Niles have a dispute. In one memorable example, Frasier calls Niles out for deceiving Daphne in order to get affection from her, while doing something very similar to his current love interest.
Frasier: She was also trusting you to tell the truth!
Niles: Oh, and the difference would be?
Frasier: Your woman is English!
Niles: [beat] Frasier, you've lost this one.
Frasier: I know, I know. It's just going to take a little while to climb down off of this particular high horse.
A French Village:
- Philippe accuses Marcel of not being so different from him while they're talking in prison, and the pair do realize their many shared traits.
- Rita, while in Palestine following the war, learns Jewish partisans massacred an entire Arab village, including women and children (which Arab fighters are now retaliating for). She notes that "we're just like everybody else", obviously thinking about similar atrocities against Jews in the recent Holocaust (she's a survivor, like many Jewish immigrants there).
Friends:
- Janice is grating on all of the friends and they all dread seeing her and even hearing her voice. In short, she annoys them. However, in the short time that Ross dated Janice, Ross' constant whining and complaining managed to get the annoying Janice to be annoyed with Ross' negativity. This completely shocks Ross and he lampshades it:
  Ross: I annoy YOU? Janice?
- Chandler realizes this about him and Mr. Heckles in The One Where Heckles Dies.
- In "The One With the Morning After", in an effort to cover up his trail from Chloe (with whom he'd had an affair) to Rachel, Ross speaks with Chloe's co-worker, Issac, who is more than eager to help Ross.
  Ross: Listen, can you keep this information to yourself?
  Issac: Aw, no problem dude. Y'know we got to look out for each other. We’re the same, you and me.
  Ross: Actually, no, we're not.
  Issac: Yeah, we are.
  Ross: No, we're not.
  Issac: Yeah, we are.
  Ross: No, we're not!!
  Issac: Okay, we're not.
  Ross: Right.
  Issac: But, we are.
  Ross: Fine.
- In one episode Rachel catches herself talking to Joey the way her father used to talk to her when she was a child.
  Rachel: I've become my father. I spent so long trying not to become my mother I didn't see this coming.

Game of Thrones:
- In "Battle of the Bastards", Daenerys wants to crucify the Masters of Slavers Bay and burn their cities to the ground in retaliation for their attacking Meereen. Hoping to avoid seeing Dany play out this trope and become more like her father the Mad King Aerys, Tyrion tells her how King Aerys planned to destroy King's Landing with wildfire to put down a rebellion, thus killing those loyal to him as well as the traitors.
  Daenerys: This is entirely different!
  Tyrion: You're talking about destroying cities. It's not entirely different. I'd like to suggest an alternate approach.
- Tyrion muses that the difference between the people of the Seven Kingdoms and the wildlings is that when the Wall was built, their ancestors just happened to be on the right side.
- Ned insists in "The Wolf and the Lion" that Robert's plan to assassinate Daenerys will make them no better than the Mad King they overthrew. When arguing to assassinate Daenerys, Robert asserts that what keeps the peace is "fear and blood," which sounds a lot like the Targaryen house words of "Fire and Blood".
- Maester Luwin asks Theon if he should really be mocking Osha for her situation in Winterfell, because "a prisoner and a guest" describes his situation almost exactly.
- Maester Aemon reveals to Jon Snow that he knows all about the pain and devastation Jon is feeling of being torn between duty and love for family as Jon is deeply worried over his father and sisters after hearing of his father's arrest in King's Landing and wants to help them by joining his brother Robb to get them back. Master Aemon, even as a blind old man, was chafed at remaining on the Wall while his entire family, even the little children, were overthrown and slaughtered. Bonus points for identifying with Jon despite Jon being the bastard son of Ned Stark, who helped overthrow the dynasty (but was adamantly against the killing of the children.)
- Tywin telling a disguised Arya how much she reminds him of his daughter. Surely Arya was thrilled. However, he meant this because both are driven, intelligent and clearly underestimated, and he meant that as a compliment and refers to the young Cersei.
- The Hound claims that Bronn is a Blood Knight much like himself. The jury's still out on how much either of them actually qualifies.
- Tyrion remarks that Robb Stark has a "certain belligerence" and thinks his father would like him. As a young man, Tywin himself raised an army and successfully led it against the enemies of his house.
- Tyrion's final words to the father he has just fatally wounded: "I am your son. I have always been your son."
- Osha to Meera Reed, as Bran reminds her — Meera pulled a knife on Osha the first time they met, Osha did the same to Bran.
- House Bolton to the other Great Houses, according to Roose in the Season 3 Blu-ray history and lore...
  Roose: The Lannisters swindled their enemies, the Storm Kings hammered them and the Starks cut off their heads. In such company, are the Boltons really so... indelicate?
- A few characters, particularly Tyrion, compare Joffrey to Aerys II aka the Mad King, for how bloodthirsty and insane Joffrey can be when he really gets riled up. It's also not unnoticed that Joffrey is a product of incest, and the Targaryens practiced incest to keep their bloodline pure but which made several of them prone to madness.
- A rare positive example, which is even rarer given the series: Ser Davos bonds with Gendry: "Two boys from Flea Bottom in the castle of a king."
Used in The George Lopez Show, when George forbids Carmen from dating Zach, she tries to change his mind by telling him that their lives are similar, but he still doesn't budge.
Carmen: His dad's never there for him and his mom's a bitter, old drunk.
[George slowly turns to Benny]
George: You ready?
Gilmore Girls: On a road trip with Lorelai, Rory, and Emily, Rory watches her mum and grandma in two adjoining rooms getting ready for bed; they're both in front of a mirror and both make the exact same movements patting night cream under their eyes, then stepping back to view the result. Rory, slightly creeped out, says "Behold my future!" to Lorelai. When Lorelai realizes she's just totally carbon-copied her mum, she freaks!
Parodied in Get Smart. In one episode after Maxwell Smart blew up the bad guy, 99 ponders whether or not Control's methods are any better than those of KAOS. Max's response?
"What are you talking about, 99? We have to shoot and kill and destroy. We represent everything that's wholesome and good in the world."
Guerrilla: Cullen, a policeman of Irish descent, somewhat sympathizes with the blacks' grievances about them being discriminated against because he remembers when shops openly barred both them and Irish people. Pence, however, will have none of it, calling them simply ungrateful.

A heroic version in the Haven episode "Friend or Faux". Audrey tells the Cornell clone that they're both people who have someone else's memories, but they don't have to let the memories define them. The clone eventually takes this to heart and turns on the original, saving Audrey's life.
Double Subverted and Played for Drama in the Helix episode "274". When head of security Daniel Aerov shoots a Vector approaching his employer/adoptive father Dr. Hatake, while the Vector is surrendering herself, CDC team leader Alan Farragut is outraged and works to remove the bullet. He accuses Daniel of panicking, and lectures him on the perils of dehumanizing infectees, while Daniel counters that he made a judgment call and notes, "the only reason you didn't fire that shot is that the gun wasn't in your hand." Alan does eventually fatally shoot a Vector in the head, ironically the same one who he earlier saved, using Daniel's dropped gun, when she, now homicidal due to The Virus, lunges at Alan's Old Flame Julia. Though Daniel used a false equivalence, Alan struggles with how easily he made the decision to kill, particularly since it's his job to treat and cure.
Heroes
- Sylar tries to prove his similaries to Claire...using a score-card. His reasoning has some holes in shall we say.
- Sylar compared Matt to himself multiple times.
- Peter and Sylar had this remark made a few times as well. It usually ends with them punching each other's lights out.
- Sylar and Angela Petrelli: he said that he now had a new level of evil to aspire to.
Home Improvement: In one episode, Randy begins to worry he's The Unfavorite son compared to Brad, since Tim and Brad share interests in things like sports and power tools. Tim assures him that while their interests may be different, Randy has a similar personality; in that both are prone to joking and making snarky remarks, especially to break tension in awkward moments.
House: Dr. Foreman and Dr. House — Foreman eventually quits House's team to save himself from becoming like House, unaware that he already is like him and always has been. In season 4, he proves once and for all that it is irrevocable:
Cuddy: You're House Lite now. The only administrator that will touch you is the one who hired House Classic. [indicates self]

Kamen Rider Wizard: Gremlin/Sora claims this of Haruto and himself. Both were victims of the Sabbat who somehow retained their humanity. Turns out to not be the case. Haruto had the willpower to never give in to despair, which is required for a Phantom to appear. Sora on the other hand... never had humanity to give up.
Devin and Mirabelle of The Kicks slowly start to realize this about each other in Season 1. They even have identical "This Princess Wears Cleats" T-shirts.
Kung Fu (2021): Before she married Jin, Mei-Li left China and went to live in the US against her parents' wishes. Nicky mentions that holding a grudge must run in the family.

Used frighteningly well in the Law & Order: SVU episode "Rage". An increasingly frustrated and enraged Stabler has spent the past 24 hours interrogating suspected serial killer Gordon Rickett about a series of child murders. By the end, just before he's released, Rickett utilizes this trope, knowing that he's got Stabler right where he wants him:
Stabler: You hide [your rage] very well. It's impressive, really, but I know it's there. Gordon, you're kidding yourself if you think you're controlling it. It's controlling you. Every lie you tell to cover your inadequacies, every perceived insult you think you're getting... just feeds it.
Rickett: You're lecturing me about rage? Are you kidding?
Stabler: I'm not.
Rickett: What do you know about controlling anything?
Stabler: I don't murder people.
Rickett: Give it time. You say you see something in me. Well, I see something in you, too. You think you control? You can't. You're controlled by your boss, by your job, by your wife, your kids... What would you be if all those controls went away?
Stabler: ...I'd be you.
- In another episode, Stabler and Benson have a falling out that's been building for several episodes, and eventually Captain Cragen assigns him a new partner played by actor Anthony Anderson. He is quick tempered, fast to threaten violence against a suspect if they don't talk. Is stubborn and won't listen to criticism. Eventually, Stabler gets tired of working with him and complains to Cragen. Cragen responds by telling him the reason he assigned him the new partner, was because he wanted Stabler to see what Benson sees everyday, since he acts just like him. Sabler gets the message, and him and Benson eventually make up.
- A kinder version is done by Cragen to Rollins in "Home Invasions". After the secret about her gambling addiction comes out, he tells her about his own alcoholism so that she'll know he understands what it's like to be in her position. Then he tells her he's going to do for her what his own captain did for him and get her help instead of taking the hard line with her.
Let The Right One: Mark hallucinates the priest he spoke to saying he's not that different from the men who'd captured and tortured him, noting how he'd murdered Isaiah's father after he begged for release so Eleanor could feed on his blood. As it's Mark's hallucination, he's thinking this about his crime due to guilt.
The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power: After listening to Galadriel ranting about how she will massacre the Orcs to the last one and will force him to watch, Adar remarks that her search for Morgoth's successor should have ended in her own mirror.

Malcolm in the Middle: While trying to track down her son, Reese, after he lied about his age to join the army in the previous season finale, Lois meets with his former Drill Sergeant Nasty and actually hits it off pretty well with him after they realize what they try to do isn't that different: make a bunch of dumbass, knuckle headed boys, into men who can be of some use to society. She even gives him tips for how to discipline the recruits. This allows him to look the other way, while she swipes the information she needs to track down Reese.
The Man in the High Castle: Juliana accuses George Dixon of being just like the Nazis when he's about to use the fact of Thomas Smith being ill against John Smith, as this would not only result in John's career destruction but also Thomas's death by involuntary "euthanasia". George admits it and says they have to be even worse than the Nazis if the Resistance wants a chance at victory.
In The Mandalorian, Lang says this to The Mandalorian in The Jedi, claiming that the two of them are willing to lay their lives down for the right cause, and then appears to have a Heel Realization and claim "but this isn't one" before laying down his weapon and bailing. However he's really only trying to get Mando to drop his guard so he can draw his sidearm and, unfortunately for Lang, Mando sees it coming a mile away and is a much quicker draw.
Burns pulls this on M*A*S*H when Trapper and Hawkeye trick Burns into thinking Trapper is taking Burns' side in outing a homosexual patient. Burns says he and Trapper were a lot alike.
Morgana from Merlin (2008) has spent the last three seasons of the show fighting tooth and nail against the tyrannical King Uther. As of season four, would-be ally Queen Annis has told her: "I fear you're more like Uther than you realize."
Midnight Caller: In the episode "The Execution of John Saringo," the titular murderer accuses the crowds gathered outside the prison of being as bad as he is since they're celebrating the death of another human being.
Midnight Sun (2016): Kahina tells Kristoff that she knows what it's like for the Sami, because she's Berber, indigenous people in Algeria, and she's had much the same experience throughout her life of racism, being viewed as “other” etc. Previously too when told about the Sápmi (the Sami regions in Sweden), she then compares it with American Indian reservations. Thor says they probably wouldn't like the comparison, but says it's still pretty similar even so.
Mohawk Girls: Multiple characters note that many Mohawk people (though victims of racism for so long) are openly prejudiced against outsiders and those with mixed ancestry, calling them out for very similar attitudes (ones they even institutionalize in their laws).
In the TV movie adaptation of A Murder of Quality, George Smiley and Ailsa Brimley confront Terence Fielding with the two murders he's committed. He begs them not to turn him in to the police, comparing what he did to the ruthless actions they took during World War 2.
Fielding: There are two sides to our heads, Smiley. I mean you've done unspeakable things too—I know you have! Sabotage, silent killings! My brother told me: the garotte, the hand, the knife... It was to preserve, Smiley...to preserve what we believe in! Us, our kind, people like us! The best of England. (Ailsa gets up from the table and stands next to Smiley) Miss Brimley, you too; you worked with him. I mean you're as guilty as any assassin with a knife. Both of you guilty. You can't judge me! I'm one of you!
In the Murdoch Mysteries episode "Vengeance Makes The Man", multiple murderer Maurice Majors claims this about Inspector Brakenreid:
Majors: Don't fool yourself, Tommy. We're two sides of the same coin.
Brakenreid: Now I know you're losing your mind.
Majors: Am I? Lets be honest with each other. How many men have you killed between your time in the army and your job as a copper?
Brakenreid: That's not the same thing.
Majors: Don't tell me you didn't get a tiny thrill every time you pulled the trigger or sent a man to the noose.
Brakenreid: You're a monster!
Majors: If I'm a monster, then so are you. The only difference between us is that badge which gives you permission to kill.
My Country: The New Age: Seon-ho says this to Bang-won.
Seon-ho: You and I are alike. We both tried to harm our own fathers. You did what you could to give your father the throne and now you're trying to steal it. Actually, you put him on the throne to steal it away. It's what I plan to do as well.
The host segments from one episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000 (The Sinister Urge) feature TV's Frank being turned into a mad bomber by watching too many Nineties action movies. He uses this trope, among other action movie cliches, when taunting Mike over the phone.

Despite their different paths in life, Don and Charlie of NUMB3RS get occasional moments throughout the show that demonstrate that they're more alike than they initially appear.
- In the Pilot episode, Alan mentions that one of the things they have in common is that they are very thorough.
- In "Counterfeit Reality", one of Don's ex-girlfriends comments that Charlie's "one part exuberance, two parts obsession" approach to their problem is reminiscent of Don.
- In "Backscatter", David comments to Alan that, "I've never seen two brothers so completely different and so much alike."
- In "The Janus List", Don gets a "Eureka!" Moment of the type that the show usually gives to Charlie, and he works through it pretty much the same exact way Charlie does (only with less math). Charlie even lampshades it.
  Charlie: Is that the face I make when I...?

The Office (US): As the Only Sane Man Jim Halpert starts escalating the professional ladder, it's shown that he's not much different than his own Pointy-Haired Boss Michael Scott. When he is put in positions of power, he is prone to making silly mistakes just like Michael. Michael comments that Jim made the same mistake he did when he was just promoted.
Once Upon a Time:
- "We Are Both" was basically an episode detailing why Regina is not so different from her mother. Gold points it out to her, and the realization that it's true leads her to allow Henry to be taken from her by Charming.
- Peter Pan tries to invoke this with his son Rumpelstiltskin in order to manipulate him to his side in "Think Lovely Thoughts". Rumpel points out one key difference: Rumpel gave up his son for power and immediately regretted it, and spent the rest of his life trying to find him and make up for it, while Pan never regretted giving up Rumpel for youth.

Person of Interest:
- The show has the variation where the good guy points out how he is not so much different from a bad guy. If he needed to murder a family, he would have made it look like murder-suicide the same way the hitman did.
- It happens again when Finch admits to genius hacker Root that they share the same arrogant belief that they're better than everyone else. Unlike Root, however, Finch is not a misanthrope and therefore submits to With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility.
- Government assassin Hersh interrogates John Reese as to the identity of his mysterious employer. John claims that I Work Alone but Hersh doesn't buy it. "You're like me. We don't give orders, we execute them."
- The identity-stealing Serial Killer in "Proteus" also tries this with Finch, only to be told by Harold that he is "only an amateur" when it comes to changing identity, and is given a Shut Up, Hannibal! speech when he attempts to justify his actions. As with Root, Finch does not appreciate being compared to self-serving sadistic killers.
Subverted in Prison Break. Brad Wyatt tells Alexander Mahone this before the latter kills the former. He doesn't get to finish the next sentence.
In Psych, Alice Bundy, who attempted to murder all the members of a sorority after a hazing gone wrong resulted in her best friend Doreen's death invokes this to Shawn twice in one episode. In the first, Shawn is trying to sympathize with her and is unable to even imagine what he would do if Gus ever died. At the end of the episode, she throws this back in Shawn's face, asking him to finish his earlier words and daring him to say that he would've done anything differently had it been Gus instead of Doreen. He determinedly avoids the subject.

Parodied in the Red Dwarf episode "Angels and Demons" in which Cat and Rimmer refuse to believe they are like their sandal-wearing-hippie-mystic Good Twins while Lister insists that his Evil Twin is no part of him.
High Rimmer: philosophy, poetry, music, and study. That is how we spend our time. Trying to expand our minds and unlock our full potential in the service of humankind.
Rimmer: What a pair of losers!
- The episode "Epideme" has the Epideme virus point out that, in killing Lister to prolong his life, he's not so different from how Lister is willing to have a chicken killed to provide the food which will prolong his life. Lister's rebuttal is along the lines that as a human, he likes to think he has certain qualities that elevate him above poultry.
- "Balance of Power" from Series 1 has Lister starting to act like Rimmer because Lister is trying to pass an exam to elevate him above Rimmer in the ranking system on board ship.
  Rimmer: You always become the thing you hate the most. Look at you, Lister! Obnoxious, ruthless, single-minded, insensitive... you're more like me than I am.
- Parodied in the Red Dwarf XII episode "Twentica". Lister has spent much of the episode complaining about how hackneyed and cliché everything about the Exponoids are. When their leader tells him "We are not so different, you and I", he decides they're just taking the smeg.

On Salem, when asked what the witches want, Cotton Mather replies "The same thing we want. A country of their own."
Scandal: Becky makes it clear to her boyfriend Huck that she is responsible for shooting the President. When Huck expresses his shock and disgust over this, she retorts that he assassinated 3 world leaders and made it look like heart attacks. She points that she shoots one president and he's suddenly better than her? He's forced to concede that she may have a point there.
Played up to the extreme in the series two finale of Sherlock. During Moriarty and Sherlock's final confrontation at the top of St. Bart's, Sherlock points out that he's more like Moriarty than anyone else in the world, though he admits to being on the good side rather than the bad. Unusually for this trope, Moriarty agrees with him.
Sherlock: I may be on the side of the angels, but don't think for one second that I am one of them.
Moriarty: You're right. You're not ordinary... You're me... You're me. Thank you! Bless you.
Squid Game: In episode 9, Gi-hun finally meets the Host of the Deadly Game, who turns out to be a cynical billionaire who believes the lives of the ultra-poor (who struggle every day just to survive) and the ultra-rich (who find no satisfaction because they never have to struggle for anything) to be equally miserable.
Stargate-verse:
- Stargate SG-1:
  - When O'Neill confronts Kinsey in his home, he finds proof that Kinsey has been working with the NID, a corrupt paramilitary group seeking to obtain alien technology by any means necessary. When Jack is disgusted by Kinsey claiming to be righteous and then "jumping in bed with NID", Kinsey cuts him off with "judge not lest ye be judged". Considering Jack is at that moment working with Maybourne, who is ex-NID... It's also not the last time SG-1 had to work with enemies to defeat an even bigger threat. Also, Maybourne proves that he can become a better man. Kinsey stays a Jerkass.
  - Ma'chello, a man who has spent his life opposing the Goa'uld, attempts to prolong his life by using a device that he has created to transfer himself into Daniel Jackson's body, essentially condemning Daniel to die of old age because Ma'chello believes that he has a greater right to live than Daniel. He is eventually convinced to help Stargate Command return Daniel to his body when Daniel points out that, by deciding that he has more right to Daniel's body than Daniel himself, Ma'chello has become as bad as the Goa'uld he hates, dismissing other lives as worthless in favour of his own existence.
- In the Stargate Atlantis episode "Common Ground", the newly-introduced Todd comments that Sheppard is more like a Wraith than he thinks, but it's strongly implied that this was meant to be a compliment.
- The Wraith Michael also says this to Teyla and Ronon. Similarly, he doesn't seem to be insulting them, just telling them the facts. Teyla insists they are nothing alike, but is unable to prove why. Ronon, on the other hand, seems to be aware of it and hates Michael anyway.
Star Trek
- Star Trek: The Original Series:
  - The episode "Balance of Terror", the defeated Romulan Commander says that he and Kirk "are of a kind", just before blowing himself up.
  - Kor from "Errand of Mercy" holds the same view to Kirk. Heck, Kor even says the same thing about Starfleet, saying that underneath the ideological differences, they're not that much different from the Klingon Empire. Ironically, Ayelborne, the Organian Elder, later turns this on its head by saying that these same attributes could lead Starfleet and the Klingon Empire into being allies.
- Star Trek: Deep Space Nine:
  - In a continuation of a look at the Federation, in "For the Cause", Eddington begins to compare the Federation with the Borg as they (at least according to him) are both assimilating other cultures so they can grow and learn.
  - In "Starship Down", Quark points out that he and the respectable Karemma trader Hanok aren't too different in their business practices when a torpedo that was sold by Hanok's group to the Jem'Hadar fails to explode (and, thus, fails to kill them both). Unlike most examples, the two of them end up laughing their asses off about it (not the least of it because Hanok's business practices saved their lives) and about the joke Hanok cracked right afterwards, all the while needing to disarm the torpedo. They become Fire-Forged Friends by the end of the episode.
  - Quark in "The Siege of AR-558" notes that when put to it humans are as savage as Klingons. Nog replies that under the circumstances that is not necessarily a bad thing. And as Quark realizes later on in the episode (after he shoots a Jem'Hadar to save Nog), after all his bluster... so are Ferengi.
  - Kira pulls this on the Cardassian Legate Damar in "Tacking into the Wind", comparing the Founders' sacking of Cardassia to the Cardassian occupation of Bajor.^note
    Damar: [regarding the murder of his wife and child] The casual brutality of it. A waste of life. What kind of state tolerates the murder of innocent women and children? What kind of people give those orders?
    Kira: Yeah, Damar, what kind of people give those orders?
- Star Trek: Voyager:
  - In "Scientific Method", one of the alien scientists using the ship's crew as guinea pigs tells Janeway that they are very similar in their need to protect their people. Needless to say, Janeway disagrees.
  - In "Nothing Human", The Doctor creates a holographic program of famous Cardassian Doctor Crell Moset (with all of his memories and skills) to save B'Elanna's life. It turns out this doctor was a horrific war criminal. Regardless, The Doctor still uses him and his knowledge to save B'Elanna' life. Later he decided to erase the program, unable to justify keeping it. Leading to this exchange:
    Crell Moset: You can erase my program Doctor, but you can never change the fact that you've already used some of my research. Where was your conscience when B'Elanna was dying on that table? Ethics, Morality, conscience; funny how they all go out the airlock when we need something. Are you and I really so different?
    The Doctor: Computer, delete medical consultant program and all related files.
  - Played for Laughs in "Life Line", when the Doctor meets the scientist who designed him. Both are played by Robert Picardo and have similar personalities, leading to this:
    Troi: I came here thinking that you were opposite sides of the same coin—identical but different. Now I see you're both exactly the same. (Beat) You're both jerks! (storms off)
- Star Trek: Picard:
  - In "The Impossible Box", Hugh doesn't see much of a distinction between the Borg Queen and the Romulans in terms of how the (ex-)drones are treated.
    Hugh: Still, we remain the most hated people in the galaxy. Just as helpless and enslaved as before. Only now, our Queen is a Romulan.
  - In "Et in Arcadia Ego, Part 1", Sutra equates the Federation's ban on synthetic lifeforms with the Romulan policy to hunt them down to extinction.
    Sutra: Are you and your Federation any different from the Romulans? Banning synthetics was just a way of exterminating us in advance.
Succession: Marcia backhandedly compliments her stepson's new Gold Digger wife Willa with "Look how far you've come." Willa turns it around on her by subtly pointing out that both of them only got where they were because of marrying into the Roys:
Willa: Well, look at us both, right?
Supernatural:
- Michael and Lucifer lecture Dean and Sam about this, who are their respective vessels. Michael tells Dean that he is dutifully obedient to his father (God), that he cast Lucifer down because he defied him, and that he practically raised his younger brother, taking care of him "in a way most people could never understand". Lucifer tells Sam that he loved and idolized his older brother and begged him to stand alongside him in refusing to bow down to humanity, but that Michael instead called him a "freak" and a "monster", casting him down because he was different and had a mind of his own.
- Dean receives this speech from a demon he has trapped in the season 3 episode "Sin City". She notices him invoking God, and explains that many demons have the same faith in Lucifer that many humans have in their god(s). When Dean calls her kind evil, she points out that in the twentieth-century humans killed so many of each other that even demons were surprised. Appealing to Dean more personally, she tells him that hell sucks for everybody, and why does he think demons want to come back to earth? Dean actually seems to feel some sympathy with this particular demon by the time Sam kills her, which definitely goes against the grain for him considering his "shoot first" mentality with most evil creatures.
- Eve gives this speech about herself and their mother in "Mommy Dearest".
- Dean eventually realizes that the reason he and Amara are so drawn to each other is that they have something in common: their unyielding love for their younger brothers; Sam for Dean, and God for Amara.

Taken: The aliens are similar to humans, both physically and biologically. In "Maintenance", Dr. Franklin Traub compares this to the similarities to a human and a fruit fly, to which Dr. Wakeman replies, "Maybe that's the point."
Hilariously invoked on an episode of Todd and the Book of Pure Evil, when one bully's wish to enlarge his manhood results in him growing a giant, talking penis that can turn people to stone. When the Jerkass main character, Todd, confronts the monster penis, it says that they are both connected to the book, though it is merely a servant while Todd could be its master.
Monster Penis: You and I, we are not so different.
Todd: Yeah? Well, I'm not a giant dick.
Monster Penis: Well, some might disagree with that, but that's beside the point.

Vagrant Queen: After learning about Elida's background Lazaro talks about how for them both their roles were defined by their parents and how they were ultimately pawns in a larger game. Elida doesn't seem to care.

Slightly played in Warehouse 13 between H.G. Wells and Myka, after H.G. has tried to destroy the world.
H.G. We became friends because we are alike in many ways.
Myka Except I didn't want to destroy the world and kill everyone in it.
The War of the Worlds (2019): George explicitly compares the Martians with the British spreading their empire across the world, though his brother (who earlier publicly supported imperialism) dismisses the idea.
War of the Worlds (2019): When talking to Catherine, Mustafa speculates on the aliens' motives. He soon concludes that, along with coming to take our planet, they simply might like killing, as many humans have.
The Wilds: Shelby, while comforting Rachel over losing Nora (so she thinks) empathizes with her guilt over this through relating how she lost her friend Becca to suicide, partly blaming herself over it.
On The Wire, Omar Little, professional drug-dealer-sticker-upper, is cross-examined in court by Amoral Attorney Maury Levy, who defends drug traffickers. When Levy accuses Omar of being a parasite on the illegal drug trade, Omar responds brilliantly:
Levy: You are amoral. Are you not? You are feeding off the violence and the despair of the drug trade. You are stealing from those who themselves are stealing from the lifeblood of this city. You are a parasite who leeches off...
Omar: Just like you.
Levy: Excuse me?
Omar: I got the shotgun. You got the briefcase. It's all in the game, right?
- In season 3 though, after a botched hit on a Barksdale stash, Omar gets this handed to him from Bunk, telling him that for all his affectations of being a man rebelling against a violent system (the drug lords) he's not very different than them (he mostly robs relatively unimportant teens and young men at gunpoint for money/drugs) and has made the area worse by stirring up a hornet's nest every-time he tries to raid a stash-house or get revenge on them.
In The Witcher (2019), Renfri mentions to Geralt during their duel that "They created me just as they created you. We're not so different." referencing their hardships and positions as outcasts in the world.

Yes, Minister: Sir Humphrey Appleby, senior civil servant and arch-conservative, and Agnes Moorhouse, revolutionary socialist, start out at explosive loggerheads. However, they soon realize that they are just as intelligent, manipulative and firmly convinced that the sheeple need to be governed by their betters for their own good, and that the only thing they really disagree on is who should do the governing. At the end of their scene, they both outright state that they think it's a crying shame that they are on opposing teams.
Y: The Last Man (2021): Nora finally calls Roxanne out for her BS in "Victoria" saying though she blames all women's problems on men, Roxanne's just like every male boss she's ever had, breaking down women to build them up again in a way she'd like.
Young Sheldon: In "Pongo Pygmaeus and a Culture that Encourages Spitting", George Sr. realizes that he has more in common with his mother-in-law than he does with his own wife.
Your Honor: Carmine tells off Jimmy over thinking he's better as a gangster than him, maintaining that ultimately both of them are just thugs.

Not So Different Remark / Live-Action TV

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