"If it's not too much of a cliché, take me to your leader. If it
is too much of a cliché, take me anyway."
An alien spaceship lands on Earth. The extra-terrestrial walks out and finds a human. They make the following statement:
"Take me to your leader".
Now a Dead Horse Trope
, and never
said seriously, or at least not without others complaining about what a terrible line it is
. Even then, it's very rarely used unless I Always Wanted to Say That
. See also How to Invade an Alien Planet
open/close all folders
Anime and Manga
- Not directly used, but invoked in Rinne no Lagrange, when Lan tells Madoka that she's an alien; Madoka asks if she really means a "Take Me to Your Leader" type alien. The answer is a non-surprised (she's apparently also familiar with the trope) yes.
- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
- Star Wars Expanded Universe
- In Protector, by Larry Niven, the alien whom Nick Sohl and Luke Garner meet on Mars says this to them. The twist: the alien is a human asteroid miner, Jack Brennan, who has accidentally been transformed into a human version of a Pak Protector.
- In Calculating God, the trope is played with: the aliens arrive and say "Take me to your geologists." They are looking for evidence of behavior of the god they believe in, and could care less about who's in charge locally, except as it concerns the geological evidence they are looking for.
- Red Dwarf, "Rimmerworld":
Lister: This is going to sound like a bit of a corny line, but... I can hardly bring myself to say it.
Rimmer-Clone: Say what?
Lister: "Take us to your leader."
Kryten: Oh, sir, how could you?!
- In the Doctor Who story "Voyage of the Damned", The Doctor says this phrase, then says "I Always Wanted to Say That".
- In fact, he has done it before in "Aliens of London" as he greets UNIT soldiers gathered around the TARDIS waiting for him. Of course, everyone involved in the former scene is an alien, and that was the Ninth Doctor anyway.
- Used by the Fourth Doctor back in the classic series, after threatening someone with a "deadly jelly-baby" didn't work out - not because they didn't buy it, but because they told him to kill the man he was threatening. The Doctor eats the jelly-baby and tells them he doesn't take orders from anyone.
- Glitz prefaces this with an "I can't believe I'm saying this" in "Trial of a Time Lord".
- The Eleventh Doctor in "Dinosaurs on a Spaceship", to Rory's disgust. "Too good to resist."
- Brother Cavil in Battlestar Galactica (Reimagined) does that when he is outed as a Cylon Spy. They take him to the brig instead.
(After having several guns pointed at him.) Well, this is an awkward moment. (Beat
) Yes, uh, he's right, I am a Cylon. And I have a message, so.... take me to your leader.
- Spoofed in an episode of Legend of the Seeker. Kahlan has approached a D'Haran prison disguised as a Mord-Sith who has captured the Seeker:
Kahlan: Take me to your warden.
- Played straight in an episode of Andromeda, where a representative of the Consensus of Parts says this to Hunt and the crew. The kicker is, the only reason he said that was because he thought that's what aliens are supposed to say to humans upon meeting them first.
- Also subverted in that the Consensus is not actually looking for the ship's captain. They're looking for the ship's AI, as they consider organics to be inferior beings.
- Jack O'Neill of Stargate SG-1 uses this sometimes. Inverted in that he's a human speaking to aliens on their own planet. There's also an element of I Always Wanted to Say That to it.
- LOST: In Recon Sawyer delivers this line to Widmore's people as a deliberate mock-up.
- Lampshaded in an episode of The Tomorrow People when a species called the Sorsons arrive on Earth and make this request, TIM mentions that the Sorsons have been monitoring Earth broadcasts for a long time and are aware of the cliché:
TIM: The Sorsons are not without a sense of humour.
- Spoofed by Tom Lehrer in "Whatever Became of Hubert?":
"We must protest this treatment, Hubert!"
Says each newspaper reader;
As someone once remarked to Schubert,
"Take us to your Lieder!"
... (Sorry about that!)
- The band Hanzel und Gretyl released a song called "Take Me To Your Leader". The music video uses a lot of scenes from old 1950's sci-fi flicks.
- Made fun of in this joke:
Two aliens land in a godforsaken part of Earth, walk around a bit and find a small gas station. It's night, and no human is around. The aliens mistake the gas pump for a kind of robot, and of them commands: "Take Me to Your Leader
!" The pump, of course, says nothing. The alien again threatens: "I said, take me to your leader!" The pump still isn't impressed. Now the alien gets angry: "If you don't take me to your leader right now, I'll shoot you with my laser!" But the other alien is getting nervous: "I wouldn't mess with that guy... better be nice." The first alien isn't impressed and points his laser at the pump: "Now take me to your leader, or I'll shoot you!" The other alien panics and runs away. Since the pump does nothing, the first alien shoots, and the gas station goes BOOM
. By a sheer miracle, the alien survives. He asks his companion "How did you know that would happen?" - "I didn't", the other one replies. "But if I see a guy who can stick his dick in his ear, I surely don't mess with him!"
- And of course the inevitable Fun T-Shirt spoofs. One shows a Grey alien smoking a joint with the words: TAKE ME TO YOUR DEALER.
- Played straight in Lunar 2. Although she looks perfectly human and is not from very far away, Lucia arrives in the beginning of the game as an alien on a mission to meet with the local divinity, the Goddess Althena. Hiro is the first person she meets, and she calmly but immediately demands he take her to see the goddess.
- In a Halloween episode of The Simpsons, during the 1996 elections, the aliens ask this and are informed that America may be switching leaders soon. This gives the aliens an idea, and they abduct and replace both Clinton and Dole.
- Lampshaded in an episode of Garfield and Friends. When Little Green Men land in Garfield's backyard, they say this, and Garfield replies "I didn't know aliens really said that!"
- In the Mater's Tall Tales episode "Unidentified Flying Mater", Mater meets a Flying Saucer who asks "Take me to your leaders". Mater then takes him to his liters of motor oil.
- In one episode of Futurama, the cast, along with Zapp Brannigan, meets with a tribe of Martians. When one of them introduces himself as tribe chief, Zapp's reply is this line.
- Rocky and Bullwinkle; during the Moon Mice arc, Gibney and Cloyd tell Rocky about how Mr. Big conquered the Moon and forced the Moon-men to build giant metal-munching mice. When a Moon-man said, "Let me guess, you want us to take you to our leader?" Mr. Big answered, "Don't be silly. I am your leader!"
- Actually played straight in Transformers Prime by Silas to Knock Out.
- An Al Brodax Popeye cartoon had Popeye, Olive and Wimpy accidentally sent to the moon on an experimental rocket. They find the moon is made of cheese and are approached by a little cheese sentry:
Popeye: What's your name, little fella?
Sentry: Krantz, captain of the guards.
- Yes, people have really said it. Any explorer in an area he doesn't know will want to consider making friends of whomever is the local boss. And in time gone by, a visitor from another culture could be so strange that he might as well be from another planet.
- A sort-of example: in general, if you're arrested in a foreign country, you'll want to tell your captors that you demand to speak with the local consul of your home country, so it's more like, "take me to the representative of my leader in your area".
- Although the odds that you will actually be taken to see them are slim-to-none. The consulate might make an appointment for one of their staff to come see you, but consular assistance for an arrest, in most countries, will usually consist of recommending a lawyer who speaks your language.
- According to The Laws and Customs of War, officers that are P.O.W.s can demand to speak to an enemy commanding officer (usually of equal rank), such as to bargain with their captors about their treatment.
- Supposedly, John Glenn was given a phonetic rendering of "I am a stranger. I come in peace. Take me to your leader, and there will be a massive reward for you in eternity." in Australian aboriginal language because of the possibility that his space capsule might land in undeveloped parts of Australia and the only people whom he might encounter after landing would be Australian aborigines who might not speak English.