Funny / Scott The Woz Season 1

"Hopefully those games didn't affect my sanity too much!"

Scott The Woz (General) | Season 1 (2017) | Scott The Woz Season 2 (2018) | Scott The Woz Season 3 (2019) | Scott The Woz Season 4 (2020) | Scott The Woz Season 5 (2021) | Scott The Woz Season 6 (2022-Early 2023) | Scott The Woz Season 7 (2023-2024)

001- Nintendo Switch Wish List

• The very first shot of the very first episode has Scott tossing his Wii U out the window.

004- Why the Wii U Failed

• Scott finishes on the topic of Nintendo's inconsistent censorship issues in... his own unique way.
  Scott: Riddle me this, Nintendo: why can't I name my character "Mr. Ass", but I can look up dead dogs on the Wii U's web browser?

005- Tinder

• The opening of the episode, which also contains the start of an iconic Running Gag:
  Scott: You know, I was recently adding a brand-new copy of Madden 08 to my ever-growing collection, when I contacted something…
  After putting the PS3 version in the collection, Scott suddenly gets dizzy, bends over and hacks up blood
  Scott: Depression!

006- What the Wii U Did Right

• How Scott opens the episode:
  Scott: Death! (Blows a party horn) It's pretty neat right?

008- Nintendo Switch: Three Days in

• Cross episode Brick Joke: Scott opened the previous video by tossing his Wii U out of a moving car onto tarmac. In the outro of his review of the Switch he finally gets his copy of The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild in the mail, only to find it's the Wii U version.

009- Console Wars

• Scott switches over to his man in the field reporting on the console war grounds, Reporty Jim. He's already been shot dead in the crossfire.

012- Breath of the Wild Isn't Perfect (Spoilers)

• Tired of having a reputation, Scott uploads a video of him eating cereal, fully clothed, to PornHub.
• While Scott manages to present some legitimate points against the game, ^note  Namely the hit-and-miss nature of the English voice dub, the samey architecture of the Shrines, the weapon durability (not so much the mechanic itself but the fact that weapons break far too often), the occasional frame rate dips, and the lack of any real postgame content what’s the biggest issue with the game to him? Zelda not hugging Link in the ending.

013- Microconsoles

• The Ouya's durability test. Read: Hitting it at chest height with a hammer. It doesn't survive.
• When Scott is about to order the Mad Catz Mojo, he looks up the price only to get a phone call as he does so.
  Scott: (picks up phone) Y'ello?
  Questiony Max: Hey, Scott! Your old pal Questiony Max here. (Scott sees the Mojo's price) Who is our lord and savior?
  Scott: JESUS CHRIST!
• Scott ends the episode with a surprisingly in-depth rant about how micro consoles are, and always have been, a bad idea. It's an impressive display of him ruthlessly tearing them down... Before he then abruptly rants about how he thinks he has scoliosis.

014- Star Fox Zero | Bad Game or Baddest Game?

• Scott downs alcohol to deal with having to play Star Fox Zero. He refuses to move his thumb off the word that comes before alcohol.
• "I don't feel like a Star Fox. I feel like a loser."
• Scott finally removes his thumb to reveal it was Rubbing Alcohol.
  Scott: That explains the death-y aftertaste. Really should work on my thumb placement.
  (collapses onto desk)

016- Mario Kart 9 Wish List

• Scott tells of how he went to a local church to talk about all the additions he wants Nintendo to make to Mario Kart 9.
  The Church suspended me indefinitely.

026- Fitness Games

• Upon seeing the talking Wii Balance Board in Wii Fit:
  Scott: Well, I have a sudden urge to make a DeviantArt account.
• Scott notes that it's been quite a while since he last played Wii Fit ("It's been 2,209 days since I saw you last!"), so he does a body test.
  Balance Board: (calculates Scott's BMI as 30.96—obese) That's obese!
  Scott: (looks down at his slender figure) Well, guilty as charged!
• Scott taping his Wii remote to a fan, so it can play the running minigame itself.
• Upon starting Jillian Michaels' Fitness Ultimatum 2009:
  Jillian: (on startup screen) You do know whose game you're playing, right? This is a Jillian Michaels game.
  Scott: I'm sorry!
  • Due to the game's forest/camping theme, Scott refers to it as Cabella's Fitness Ultimatum.^note Cabella's is an outdoor recreation retailer currently owned by Bass Pro Shops.
  • He also says the game's cheap-looking hub world "looks more concentration than fitness".
  • While the game is fairly low-quality overall, Scott cites the log-balancing minigame as being especially egregious as one can step off the Wii Balance Board and do nothing (illustrated by him patiently waiting on his bed) and the game will effectively play itself.
  Scott: But hey...get this:
  Jillian: Excellent. Guess what's coming your way? A new tip!
  Scott: Incentives!
• Scott is unable to play EA Sports Active 2 due to it requiring a body tracker (which, due to buying the game used, he doesn't have), so he buries it in the yard.
• Scott doesn't have a basketball in order to play NBA Baller Beats (a Kinect rhythm game where the player uses a basketball), so he improvises by using a watermelon...and it works.

027- Most Wanted Smash Bros. Stages

• Scott's closing statement gets oddly intense.
  Scott: I can go all day on this. Seriously, people know me as the guy who can come up with Smash Brothers stages. Others are like "No way" and I'm like, "Art Academy Stage" and they're like "Whoa, wait a second man!" and I'm like "Elite Beat Agents Stage!" and they're like "Good God, man! Slow down!" and I'm like "The Sanderson's House from Chibi-Robo!" and they're like "THIS MAN IS A F*CKING ANIMAL, HE MUST BE STOPPED!"

031- The Art of Speedruns

• Scott's no-touch speedrun of Breath of the Wild. After 48 minutes, he still hasn't left the Shrine of Resurrection.
  Scott: It's a work in progress.

032- Gravity Rush | Tales from the Backlog

• After finding out how valuable his copy of Gravity Rush Remastered is, Scott takes to the street with a placard that reads "I OWN Gravity Rush -Remastered- -HONK- if you AGREE" and waves it at passing cars. He's then happily surprised when someone actually honks.

033- Game Consoles That Refused to Die

• We open on Scott smashing a PlayStation 2 with a hammer to the point it's half exposed.
  Scott: Hey all, Scott here! And before you ask, honestly, what does it look like I'm doing?

034- Sonic the Hedgehog (1991) | Birth of a Laughing Stock

• Scott tosses away the Greatest Hits Sonic the Hedgehog box away in disgust and after several jump cuts, it lands right in the toilet bowl.
  Lucky shot.
• Scott tosses the cartridge of Sonic one in the same manner... only for it to perfectly land in an Genesis that was inexplicably set up in the bathroom.
  Son of a bitch, I'm so lucky!

036- The Best Games of All Time

• Scott's intro is interrupted by Scott reacting to Paper Mario: Color Splash on his desk with a loud "EW!" and smacking it with a frying pan.
  Scott: Always keep a frying pan handy. You never know when a 7 out of 10 game is gonna strike because obviously, all those games are hot trash.
• At the end, Scott decides to use his new thesaurus to look up what the antonym of "Good" is just for fun.
  Scott: Man, what a waterfall of quality. Who knew video games could be so good? Yeah, I'm so happy right now, I think I'm going to take my new thesaurus on a test drive and see what the antonym of "good" is just for funsies- I have look at the worst games of all time next, I'm f*cked.

037- The Worst Games of All Time

• Scott's theory on how the worst games of all time were made leads him to one figure, Mr. Scoliosis.
  Voice offscreen: Ah, my f*cking back!
  Scott: That must be him!
  (2 hours later)
  Scott: Yeah, turns out those games were bad due to mismanagement and not because a guy with a curved spine.
• Number 9 is 101-in-1 Explosive Megamix:
  This is one of the worst experiences I've had in quite a while. Which is actually quite nice, this game made me realise I have a pretty solid life if I'm getting angry at a seven dollar WiiWare game from 2011.
• When he reaches number 8:
  Scott: NRA Varmint Hunter is a hunting game released for Microsoft Windows.
  (the EarthBound victory fanfare plays as we pan out to reveal he's using a Platform/Macintosh)
  Scott: I can't play it.
  • Later becomes a Brick Joke when he reaches the number 1 spot (Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing) and the same pan-out with music occurs ("Bit more exciting a reveal the first time around"), though this time he turns to an unofficial Mac port of the game to play it.
• The ending.
  Scott: Wow, oh wow! Who knew video games could be so bad? Hopefully those games didn't affect my sanity too much.
  (cut to Scott driving) AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
  (cut to Scott standing in the game room) AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
  (cut to Scott in the shower fully clothed) AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
  (cut to Scott in a cornfield) AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
  (cut to Scott signing a timeshare agreement in silence)
  (cut to Scott taking medication) AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
  (cut to Scott pouring milk) AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
  (cut back to Scott at his desk)
  Scott: (nonchalantly) Yeah, those games were pretty bad.

038- NES and SNES Classic Alternatives

• The sheer Mood Whiplash of the opening:
  Scott: (usual cheerful tone) Hey all, Scott here! And you know what I could go for right now? A working kidney, I have three days to live.

041- Nintendo World Championships

• COMPETITIVE EDGE

042- The Wii: Underpowered Yet Underrated

• Scott has to get the Obligatory Joke of a Wiimote crashing into a TV out of the way so does so. But because he's throwing it at a CRT, the Wiimote is the one to break.

043- Polybius

• The ending. All of it:
  • Scott trying to hunt the Polybius cabinet only for it to appear behind him and start chasing him.
  • The image of the cabinet running towards Scott (read: the guy inside the cardboard prop awkwardly waddling towards Scott).
  • The cabinet "mauling" Scott while he just repeatedly tells it to stop with an annoyed tone like he's talking to a misbehaving pet.
  • Scott destroying the cabinet by throwing a baseball bat at it like a javelin.
  Scott: Luckily, I was diagnosed with a little thing I like to call street smarts!
  • The fate of his "Halloween Watermelon".
    (camera ominously zooms in on the watermelon on the shelf of a store)
    Offscreen Person: F*ck, man, why'd we buy a rotten watermelon offa that guy, get that thing outta here!
    (cut to watermelon being thrown against a dumpster)
• From the Bloopers:
  • The “street smarts” scene immediately falls apart when Scott can’t find where he hid his bat.
  • "(sits down) Let's talk about a game- (gets back up)"

044- The Legend of Zelda (NES) | Tales from the Backlog

• The only thing that makes less sense than the game’s Guide Dang It! moments is Scott’s copy of FlingSmash being soaked whenever he takes it off the shelf.

045- Super Mario Galaxy | Ten Years of Bliss

• Scott reflects on how things can change in ten years, at which point we jump to 2027 where Scott's wearing a chef's hat
  Future Scott: Hey all, Future Scott here and welcome to 2027 where I wear a chef's hat now and Robo Ebola reigns supreme.

046- Black Friday

• "I bought f*cking soap!"

047- Call of Duty on Wii

• "The Call of Duty series, otherwise known as 'Hey guys, my crotch is huge, I swear!'-"
• When discussing Call of Duty: World at War, Scott claims that Wii games can be categorized as either "pro-Nazi" and "anti-Nazi" categories, and then shows an assortment of Wii games labeled as "anti-Nazi" while the only "pro-Nazi" game is Wii Music.
• Scott clapping his hands and stomping his feet to enemy soldiers being burnt alive.

048- Lost in Localization

• "Gay Conversion Therapy!"

050- A Very Madden 08 Christmas

• Scott invents his own month of Bluth consisting of the first 23 days of December to have more holidays. Highlights include:
  2nd Bluth- CafePress.com Day
  5th Bluth- Did I leave that Thing on the Counter? Day
  8th Bluth- CafePress.com Day II
  11th Bluth- Oops! I Almost Died Day
  12th Bluth- Haggle a Small Business Day
  13th Bluth- Heckle a Small Business Day
  15th Bluth- Everyone Brings Potato Salad to the Family Get Together But Nobody Eats it Day
• Scott accepts an invitation to V.A.G., with his awkward thumb covering up the name, Vegan's Anonymous Gathering.
• "Diet God is still God."
• The prelude to Scott's dream sequence:
  911 Responder: Based on past experiences, it doesn't sound like you're brushing with toothpaste, it sounds like you're brushing with Raid. ^note A bug killing spray for those unaware.
  Scott: (holding can of Raid) Not again!
  (Scott collapses)

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