Funny / Pinocchio

  • Pinocchio has a few, probably unintentional examples, perhaps slipping into Black Comedy.
    • There's the scene where Stromboli finds and bites a piece of metal among his gold coins, goes into a rant of gibberish...then suddenly calms down: "For you, Pinocchio."
    • Also, during Lampwick's not-funny transformation sequence, the way he says "What the...?" is at least snicker-worthy
      • At the first step of the transformation, Pinocchio takes one look at him, and casts off his drink. And then tosses away his cigar too.
      • When his transformation kicked into over-drive, and his first reaction was "I've been double-crossed! I've been framed!" As if he'd correctly deduced that someone else was turning him into a donkey. Like you'd really think that way in that situation.
    • "What's he think I look like? A jackass?"
      • "You sure do!"
    • Even the coachman's infamous " BOYS!" line is pretty funny to watch when one is older.
  • What was the Tear Jerker moment of the movie, reverses itself when the now-real Pinocchio asks Geppetto why he's crying, who answers with "because you're dead, Pinocchio. Now lie down."
    • However, there's a bit of Fridge Horror in that moment; Geppetto doesn't seem surprised to hear Pinocchio's voice, which could imply that he's been hallucinating in his grief, and doesn't realize that the voice is real this time.
  • "Why do I have to go to school?" "To... y'know, learn things. Get smart."
  • Pinocchio's finger on fire.
    Pinnochio: Look, pretty!
    Geppetto: OH! HELP!
    • Jiminy attempting to rush to the rescue with his tiny thimble-sized hat of water... And then falling face-first into it when he trips over a pencil.
  • "A little wooden boy. Now -- a wooden boy?!"
  • What's an actor want with a conscience anyway?
  • "Who's there?" "It's me." "Oh, it's me...wh-HUH?!?"
  • When Honest John and Gideon are performing a fake diagnosis on Pinocchio to get him to go to Pleasure Island.
    Honest John: Oh my, this is serious. (cut to Gideon's notepad, which is nothing but scribbles)
  • The first time Monstro sneezed, and Jiminy gave a rather understated "Gesundheit." Made even funnier considering it occurred during an otherwise very dramatic moment. The staff admitted during the premiere, that line got the biggest laugh of the movie.
  • In "I've Got No Strings":
    Pinocchio: I've got no strings to hold me do—(falls down the steps)
    • Followed by Stromboli making this indescribably hilarious squeal of fury.
    • And followed further by a string of incomprehensible babbling.
    • Meanwhile, an irate Jiminy says, "Go ahead, make a fool of yourself — then maybe you'll listen to your conscience!"
  • After the clocks scene, in which dozens of clocks strike 9, Geppetto still has to check his pocket watch for the time.
  • During the fishing scene, Figaro slaps one of the tuna in the face after it lands in the trough.
    • And when he puts another one in, the fish's tail smacks Figaro in the face.
  • After the annoying clock scene (a CMOF in itself), Jiminy sees a bright light coming through the window.
    Jiminy: Now what's up?
  • Admit it, Stromboli is one of Disney's most hilarious villains ever, even during the scene where's locking Pinocchio up in a cage. You can tell that Bill Tytla was having a blast animating this guy.
    • "QUIET! SHUT UP! Before I knock-a you silly!"
    • Also of note is when Stromboli shakes that big, fat ass of his when he goes "Constantinopalee!"
  • "As I live and breathe! A fairy! Mm-mm!"
    • All of Jiminy's lines during the Blue Fairy's introduction, including the scene where she asks him to be Pinocchio's conscience.
  • Gideon the cat attempting to hit Pinoke with a mallet, only to be stopped by Honest John
    Honest John: No no, stupid! (snatches mallet) DON'T be crude! (whacks Giddy on the head with mallet)
  • When Jiminy tries to get Pinocchio away from Honest John and Gideon:
    Jiminy: Remember what I said about temptation?
    Pinocchio: Uh-huh?
    Jiminy: (gesturing with his umbrella) Well, that's him.
    Pinocchio: Oh, no, Jiminy, that's Mr. Honest John.
    Jiminy: (surprised) Honest John??
  • When Jiminy finds Pinocchio at Pleasure Island, he starts chiding him. Then, Jiminy kicks a pool ball in frustration, lets out a yelp of pain and goes right back to scolding Pinocchio.
  • The nose scene, especially the Blue Fairy playing along with Pinocchio's increasingly improbable story.
    Pinocchio: "What happened?!"
    Blue Fairy: "Perhaps you haven't been telling the truth, Pinocchio."
    Jiminy: (sitting in the bird's nest that's appeared at the end of Pinocchio's nose) "'Perhaps'?!"
  • When Gepetto and Figaro go out to inspect what the loud crashing noise was, Figaro, walking right underneath Gepetto in his nightgown, sees that Pinocchio has come to life and, in fright, jumps right into Gepetto's nightgown. That had to hurt.