Film: The Giant Spider Invasion
A 1975 film from director Bill Rebane that dares to show that yes, there are rednecks
living well north of the Mason-Dixon line, and no, covering a Volkswagen with fake fur and sticking legs on it does not make a convincing giant spider.
A meteorite crashes in Merrill, Wisconsin, leaving behind an ominous "wormhole" in the impact crater and a bunch of geodes scattered across a really unappealing farmer's property. Between belittling his alcoholic wife Ev, visiting the local prostitute, and threatening to spank his wife's teenage sister
, Dan Kester attempts to sell the extra-dimensional rocks to his equally unappealing cousin Billy, but is miffed when the jeweler informs him that they don't have much value. The farmer is distracted from his monetary woes when it turns out the"geodes" are actually eggs, which hatch to release first a swarm of tarantulas, then badly-made dog-sized spider puppets, and finally the Volkswagenspinne
While the assorted arachnids do their best to clean up northern Wisconsin's gene pool, a pair of scientists wander around ineffectually before airdropping a device that manages to close the wormhole and melt the spider-car. There are a couple of B-plots, including a fire-and-brimstone preacher's revival, a missing motorcyclist, and a young couple's quest to find a place to make out, but that's about it.
The cast is populated by famous has-beens including Alan Hale Jr.
as a dumpy sheriff, Barbara Hale
as a lady scientist in a pantsuit (sadly not a Hot Scientist
), and Steve Brodie
as a morbidly obese NASA scientist.
Bill Rebane has decided to turn The Giant Spider Invasion
into a stage musical, and why not? He hopes it'll have legs.
For the Mystery Science Theater 3000
version, please go to the episode recap page