Exactly What It Says on the Tin. William Shakespeare's Hamlet rewritten as a comedy, the second in a series of genre-flipped William Shakespeare plays by Shrikecatcher.
Can be read here.
Tropes
- Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking:Since we were cops, we already knew all the most horrible things that went down in Miami, like drug deals, murders, and the elderly moving in from up north.
- The Beautiful Elite: Everyone in Miami is sexy.
- Captain Obvious: Horatio puts it best in his narration:We all called [Polonius] Captain Obvious, because that was his last name and it's only polite to address him in such a manner.
- Cool Car: Horatio drives a mother-effin' Humvee.
- Epic Fail: Invoked by Polonius when his servant Reynaldo fails a pop quiz:Polonius: "I will take a snapshot of this moment, upload it to the Internet and label it epic!"
Reynaldo: "No, my lord, anything but that!"
- Food as Bribe: Horatio mentions in his narration that doughnuts are just as popular as illegal drugs by smugglers for their use in making many a Dirty Cop.
- Glasses Pull: Come on, this is Horatio Caine we're talking about. It only happens every other line of dialogue when he's around.
- Hot for Teacher: Beginning of Act I, Scene iii:"But Horatio," you might be saying to yourself because I'm fictional you idiot, "this is Hamlet, the Magnum Opus of English literature, and Mr. Jacobs wouldn't like you talking about the Bard's greatest work in such a manner. Mmm...Mr. Jacobs..."
- Modern AU Fic: To present-day Miami.
- Ms. Fanservice: Ophelia....since she's the only attractive young female in the cast, I think it's safe to say all we really care about is the skin she was showing.
- Overly Long Gag: As mentioned above, Horatio's Glasses Pull.
- Pool Scene: Ophelia's introduction in Act I, Scene iii.
- Reference Overdosed: Oh yes.
- Running Gag:
- Everyone in Miami is sexy.
- "Okay, I'll marry him."
- Rosencrantz bears a striking resemblance to Gary Oldman, and is a much better actor than Guildenstern.
- Shout-Out: When the Ghost says he's the spirit of Hamlet's father, Hamlet responds by quoting Luke Skywalker's reaction to discovering the truth about his father.Hamlet: NOOOOOOOOOO!!! That's not true! That's IMPOSSIBLE!
- Sibling Rivalry: Laertes and Ophelia have a particularly violent one.
- Straight Edge Evil: Claudius. He may be a genocidal maniac, but he won't abide by smoking.
- Take That!: Fifty Shades of Grey gets an extended one in Act II, Scene ii, when Hamlet reveals that he's reading it. This simple fact alone causes Claudius to pull the fire alarm and Polonius to declare him insane. The firemen fail to destroy the book with their axe, prompting someone to quip that they're going to need to call in a HAZMAT squad. When the book is torn to shreds, Polonius comments that Hamlet doesn't seem terribly distraught about this turn of events; Hamlet reveals he has a copy of Fifty Shades on his Kindle, prompting one of the firemen to call him a monster.
- Unfortunate Names: Claudius's subject, Voltemand, who is always being mistaken for Voldemort and thus can never get season tickets for the Heat.
- You Monster!: A firefighter who was called in to destroy Hamlet's copy of Fifty Shades of Grey calls him a monster because Hamlet has a backup copy on his e-reader.