Rate the song on the Moh's scale of LYRICAL hardness

I'm gonna give it an 8, because there's either a suicide or a murder in there somewhere. I'm not sure which, but there's one in there.

Sammy J - Delete

Okay, so I couldn't find the lyrics online for this...so I'm just gonna post them here I guess. Sorry for length.

When Grandma died, my father drove us to her house to clean it up

and sort possessions into piles; things to keep and things to chuck away

and Saturday became a whole weekend

as we would stop to read her letters, look at photos like we were getting to know her

and I can't help but feel that my grandkids won't treat me with such respect

when I go; there'll be no box or photo albums to collect.

Just a hard drive full of folders and in the folder there'll be files.

And if they double click those files they'll see me.

But there'll be no heavy lifting, so there'll be no nostalgic sifting through my life as I can see.

Now...

When my life is completed, I'll be deleted.

Click one button, there goes Granddad, now it's time for brunch.

Every email sent, every iCal event.

But future grandkids, give me a chance.

Just treat that hard drive like my house and walk in through the door.

Watch your step; the desktop's messy and my shit's all on the floor.

But keep on going to the study, than in the bottom drawer,

you'll find pictures that tell my story.

Like the one of me and Heath in France, with a Croissant in my pants that looks like a penis.

Good times.

And the one of me and Hannah in Mildura, sitting inside a fibreglass orange and trying not to laugh,

cause the guy who built the fibreglass orange was taking the photo for us,

and he seemed so proud and we felt so bad

because up until the moment he approached us, we'd been standing there taking the piss

cause it looked nothing like an orange. We thought it was an armadillo!

Ok, I confess; you had to be there and to you it might seem boring

But I guess, I thought twenty gig of 'Jpegs' were worth storing

Cause someone, someday, might care that their Granddad stood there

on the Champs De Lise with a Croissant in his pants.

But because they're not collated in an album - laminated, to protect the tears that fall - will there be any tears at all?

Then open up my Inbox and try to understand that's a lifetime's correspondence that you're holding in your hand;

every Youtube link I sent, every eBay bid recorded,

every email that's meant to be for someone, but got forwarded accidentally, cause some fuckwit pressed 'reply all'

so that twenty people now know that I think that I'm being overcharged by my graphic designer,

and one of those twenty people is my graphic designer.

And you might like to read your Granddad's grovelling reply,

in which he tries to walk a fine line between apologizing and blaming someone else.

And that's just one of many thousands of conversations you'll find there;

but you won't bother, you won't care, I know.

You'll just press delete.

A lifetime on Earth, delete.

So that's what I'm worth?

Just hold on 'Alt', 'Delete', 'Control' and format my heart and soul.

And grandkids, I know you can hear me now cause I'm giving this song to my lawyer to play to you when you ask about my will.

Cause you won't get anything until you open every file, and that could take a while because my iTunes library will bear witness to my flagrant disregard for copyright.

And the tool bar at the bottom indicates that it'll take you 16 days to get through all my random songs

like 'Do The Bartman" and the instrumental album that's inspired by the music from the Lion King;

it's not actually the music from the Lion King, just inspired by it.

Don't know why I bought it. Never listened to it but I hope that you enjoy it.

And that song "Tubthumping" by the band 'Chumba Wumba'.

Yeah, that's the sorta shit your Granddad liked when he was younger.

He synced it to his iPhone, like all he generation long before they started dying off from iPhone radiation…

Oh I just remembered, if you come across a folder called 'Home Movies' best avoid that, your Grandma and I were young.

And that led to you, so show some respect!

Don't eject me, no and please don't press delete.

Edited by Murataku on Aug 27th 2018 at 9:59:29 PM

5.5 - Surprisingly poignant and unexpectedly thought provoking though too self-aware in its humour to really feel it has as much weight as it could. Though the subject matter does have a kind of earnestness to it I can't really deny.

Vulvagun - Confessions of a Flesh Eater

Lyrics

Has a theme of atonement on the surface, but the almost fetishistic way of describing the sins give the lyrics blasphemous vibes, turning the prayer into a celebration, 8.

Howlin' Wolf - Evil

Edited by Millership on Sep 17th 2018 at 9:34:01 PM

Invalid Litter Dept. - At the Drive-In

I would rate this a 8.7 given the disturbing subject matter.

You're supposed to rate the song of the above poster (or whoever posted a song last), not the one you posted yourself.

Edited by Millership on Sep 18th 2018 at 10:13:47 PM

Oh, I apologise.

So, since Keiron Coran seemingly won't continue the game, I'll start over.

BrentalFloss - Limbo with lyrics

Lyrics are in the description.

Hard 5 - While lyrics imply pessimism and being in an awful place, it's written in an almost happy-go-lucky sort of way. It's very strange.

Green Day - Platypus (I Hate You)

2 - It's angry, really angry, and quite spiteful too but it's so openly blunt and straightforward about it that it sounds less hateful and more like a really off-the-rails temper tantrum set to a simple, catchy rhyme scheme. It's really hard not to giggle reading this.

Fates Warning - The Apparition

An adventurer travels through a hostile land, having visions that his quest (and his life) is pointless. Though the song's somewhat open-ended it's still depressing, 8.

Emilie Autumn - Shalott

The lyrics

The song

Melodramatic angst suggests a 6: there is death and depression, but it all plays out like a dark, yet pretty storybook.

Beck - Tropicalia (lyrics in the description)

I'd give this an 8.5 out of ten. There's no profanity or crude language, but it still packs a very heavy punch and paints a very dark atmosphere.

And now...the six merry murderesses of the Cook County Jail...in their rendition of...The Cell Block Tango.

Lyrics here

Edited by Spottedleaf on Oct 18th 2018 at 8:55:39 AM

6/10. The lyrics are very dark, but due the dark cabaret style of the instrumentation and their vocals. They seem pretty cartoonish.

Contract by Lil' Jon

It's about a guy that's a pimp. It seems to glorify prostitution so I suppose it's a 9.

Death-Living Monstrosity

6 - I know the unpleasant subject matter is supposed to be s h o c k i n g and invoke some sense of RIGHTEOUS ANGER but Chuck's clumsy phrasing and occasionally laughably stupid lines give this the unintentionally humorous effect of reading the equivalent of greasy old boomer rants on facebook news page comment sections.

Cauldron Born - Imprisoned with the Pharaohs

Lyrics make vague promises of (justified) And I Must Scream punishment, 8.

Nina Simone - Sinnerman

6-The person in the song seems to be trying to repent to no avail, and begs God to grant forgiveness. Sounds pretty hopeless if you ask me.

Slipknot-Frail Limb Nursery/Purity

9/10; I can't get a 100% indication of what's going on but what I do see is dark and eerie.

Epiphany from Sweeney Todd

Edited by Spottedleaf on Oct 29th 2018 at 8:26:37 AM

7. I'm getting nihilistic vibes and homicidal urges from the singer, though it sounds a bit too cheery for it to be rated higher.

Pantera-Drag the Waters

EDIT: Spell check

Edited by SprayPay on Oct 31st 2018 at 9:40:46 AM

It's an 8. It deals with rape, murder, deceptive women and trying to see people for what they really are.

King's X - In The New Age

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whJzbh_Ri0E

Here's the Lyrics

http://www.metrolyrics.com/in-the-new-age-lyrics-kings-x.html

6-7. Deals with generations blindly following ignorant people, and also being unaware of the dangers and deception in front of them, disguised as altruism.

Megadeth-Last Rites/Loved to Deth

6.5 - Potentially compelling subject matter but the "my first grade school poetry assignment" level phrasing makes ideas that should be poignant come off as hamfisted and clumsy.

Charon - Sulphur Seraph (The Archon Principle)

Edited by StillbornMachine on Nov 1st 2018 at 7:25:52 AM

Explicitly apocalyptic imagery, delivered in a rather over-the-top way, which feels somehow fitting, 10.

Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - The Mercy Seat

5-6. The narrator keeps proclaiming his innocence up until he gets to the electric chair, but claims he was lying about being innocent. The fact that we aren't given much info about his crime, and the fact that it only dwells on his impending execution with biblical references prevent this from going higher.

Throbbing Gristle-Hamburger Lady

Edited by SprayPay on Nov 4th 2018 at 7:49:23 AM

Graphic descriptions of a mutilated woman, 9.

Depeche Mode - Wrong