- Attention Deficit... Ooh, Shiny! - an ze drugz, ze do nothing
- American Accents - I lack the southern accent that all my New England friends say my family has
- Bishōnen - in high school, not so much now
- Bookworm - despite the ADHD, more in the past than the now
- Cannot Convey Sarcasm
- Driven to Suicide - I got better
- Everybody Smokes - they called me cancerlad for a damn good reason, once upon a time
- Informed Judaism - realized I was technically jewish around Mom's second marriage
- Love Makes You Crazy - or paranoid. That's why I don't date
- Myers Briggs - INTP. "Seek to develop logical explanations for everything that interests them. Theoretical and abstract, interested more in ideas than in social interaction. Quiet, contained, flexible, and adaptable. Have unusual ability to focus in depth to solve problems in their area of interest. Skeptical, sometimes critical, always analytical."
- Oblivious to Hints - and much else
- Prematurely Bald - and pissed
- Psycho Lesbian - I find them oddly alluring
- Raised by Wolves - or the four dogs mother had when I was an infant. There are literally no pictures of me sans schnauzer until I was in highschool.
- Redemption Quest - my raison d'etre maintenant
- Red-Headed Stepchild
- Shorter Means Smarter - I'm actually average sized, but stopped growing in 8th grade.
- Stroke the Beard - guilty. May be a nervous carry over from my smoking days.
- The Cynic - oh, boy.
- Why Did It Have to Be Snakes? - responds to most insects with extreme predjudice
Tropers / Cancerlad