Are you lonely? In need of companionship?
The world just feels so hot and crowded, yet so cold and lonely.
Don't have a cow, man! Have a Gay Best Friend™!
A Gay Best Friend™?
A Gay Best Friend™! With a Gay Best Friend™, you won't have to feel that your masculinity is being threatened. We have Camp Gay for cheap laughs and fashion advice, and Straight Gay for bros, burgers and beer. They'll leave your apartment cleaner than when they came in, cook like a Supreme Chef, make for the perfect Romantic Wingman without cock-blocking you and keep your girlfriend's many girlfriends occupied so that you can ignore them without getting in trouble, guaranteeing that you'll get lucky later that night.
Are all the Gay Best Friends™ male? What if I want a lesbian friend?
Oh we're sorry, the Gay Best Friend™ only comes in male.
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...but if you order within the next five seconds, we will throw in a 50%-off coupon for your next purchase of our upcoming line of Token Lesbians™!
50% 50% That's almost half!
You bet it is! So call the number below and get yourself a new Gay Best Friend™!
Call 1-555-TROPECO if there are any problems with the Trope Co.® Gay Best Friend™. If you are in any way dissatisfied with your order, please call and return your Gay Best Friend™ with full money-back guarantee. We cannot guarantee in-tact warranty should the Trope Co.® Gay Best Friend™ make you challenge your own sexual orientation and inevitably have sex with you.
