"The Criminal Kind" is the thirteenth episode of Cougar Town's fourth season.
After watching The Breakfast Club, Jules learns that each of her friends have done bad things in their past, and becomes intent on proving she's not the only "goody two-shoes" in the group. She, Laurie, and Bobby go to the store so Jules can steal something. After backing out of stealing some lip balm, she and Laurie leave the store, but the manager stops them and takes a hairdryer from her back, which Laurie stole. After locking them in grocery store jail, they're joined by Bobby, who had been eating food off the shelves.
Ellie messes with Grayson by writing anonymous mean reviews about his bar, leading him to realize he's a dick to his customers, so she and Tom try to teach him how to fake being nice without a judgmental look on his face. After failing, he decides to embrace his judgmental attitude, but it gets him and Ellie thrown in the same grocery store jail that Jules, Laurie, and Bobby are in for eating a grape off the shelves.
Meanwhile, Travis, who's been playing the field to dull his feelings for Laurie, is starting to suffer from a case of impotence, and due to Andy's abilities to sympathize with whatever another person is feeling, he gets it too, and tries to help Travis solve his issue to solve his own.
This episode contains examples of:
- Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: A very toned-down example, but the Cul De Sac crew is accused of stealing a hairdryer, eating food off the shelves, failing to steal lip balm, and eating one grape off the shelf.
- Breakfast Club: Parodied with Jules, Ellie, Laurie, Grayson, and Bobby.
- The Breakfast Plot: Done with Jules, Ellie, Laurie, Bobby, and Grayson in a grocery store, where they're all accused of stealing.
- Couch Gag: "John Hughes is a God."
- Disproportionate Retribution: Invoked. The police aren't gonna come arrest some people for a stolen hairdryer, food eaten off the shelves, attempting and backing out of stealing lip balm, and eating one grape. But before the manager lets them go, he forces them to write a Breakfast club-style letter about "just who they think they are".
- Freudian Excuse: Jules claims that growing up on a farm and having a kid at a young age prevented her from being a "badass" like the others.
- I Resemble That Remark!: Jules, in attempting to prove that she's not a "goody two-shoes".
- Grayson, when attempting to prove he's not a dick.
- Leaning on the Fourth Wall: Done by Bobby, Travis, and Andy, who talk about how "nothing ever happens" in "The Sea Story", which happens to be the name of Bobby's boat.
- Not So Above It All: The main plot focuses on Jules' attempt to prove this, as does Grayson's plot.
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: In-universe; Ellie agrees with Laurie about childhood problems, and with Tom about Grayson's dickishness.
- Shout-Out: The whole episode is one to The Breakfast Club.
- Third Line, Some Waiting: Referenced by Bobby, Travis, and Andy. Their storyline doesn't play into the main plot at all, unlike the other two.