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  • "New Math", where Lehrer sets a basic arithmetic problem to music. Of particular note is when the audience winces at doing the problem in Base-8.
    "Don't panic. Base-8 is like Base-10 really...if you're missing two fingers."
    • Remember also that Lehrer was a mathematician outside of his music, so this was probably some genuine frustration he was expressing here.
    "Remember, the focus should be on what you're doing rather than getting the right answer."
  • "National Brotherhood Week" is, in some ways, a difficult song to listen to even today, but it's also difficult not to laugh at lines like:
    Oh the Protestants hate the Catholics
    And the Catholics hate the Protestants
    And the Hindus hate the Muslims
    And everybody hates the Jews!
  • Most of "Wernher von Braun", but especially:
    Don't say that he's hypocritical
    Say rather that he's apolitical
    "Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down?
    That's not my department," says Wernher von Braun.
  • "The Vatican Rag". For example:
    Get in line in that processional
    Step into that small confessional
    There the guy who's got religion'll
    Tell you if your sin's original
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    • Also, the intro — "I have a modest example here..." Tom Lehrer's never provided a "modest" example of anything in his life and his audience knows it.
    • Heck, the audience goes to pieces the very instant he announces the title!

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