Funny / Look Who's Talking

• Mikey drops one of Albert's ceramic soldiers and stomps on it, saying "Yeah! Let's trash this place! Take that, Tonto."
  • Before that, Mikey needs a diaper change:
    Mikey: Ugh, too much fruit.
    [...]
    Albert: Is he taking a dump?
    Mollie: No, he's thinking real hard!
  • Mollie slamming Mikey's shitty diaper on Albert's expensive desk.
    Albert: For Christ's sake, Mollie, that's a $10,000 desk.
    *shlorp!*
    Mollie: Now it's junk!
• As Mikey sees his mom and James kiss at the end of the film:
  Mikey: Now should I tell them I need a new diaper? (beat) Nah, I'll wait.
• Mikey looking at a pair of huge breasts: "They come in different sizes? What are these, jumbos?"
  James: What are you looking at? I'll bet you're thinking the same thing.
  Mikey: Yeah, lunch!
• Mikey's first interaction with his grandma.
  Grandma: Who's got a wet tushy?
  Mikey: I give up.
  
  (Grandma baby talking Mikey)
  Mikey: Oh yeah. She's gone.
• Molly is informed that as far along as her pregnancy is, the baby's gender will now become apparent. Cut to inside the womb:
  Mikey: Hey, look at that. I've got another arm growing there. What's it doing way down there? Now how am I going to get that in my mouth?
  • Gets a callback in the second movie:
    Julie: Okay, let's see; two arms, two legs...two mouths??
• Mikey yanking on his umbilical cord, "Hey, let's get some apple juice down here!" Cut to Molly drinking a gallon jug of the stuff.
• At the end of an argument in the first movie, James and Molly are having in her apartment:
  James: That's it! I've had it! NOW GET OUT!
  Molly: I LIVE HERE!
  James: I KNOW IT! (storms out)
• Molly's demonic turn during her contractions in the second movie.
• The scene where Julie learns to walk is set to the TriStar Pictures logo theme of the time.
• After finding out Albert is cheating on her with another woman^note Albert promised to divorce his wife so he can be with Molly to raise their child, but then he falls in love with someone else, Mollie walks away heartbroken, while her friend Rona beats the crap out of him, still wearing the dress she hasn't paid for yet.
• Newborn Mikey suddenly figures out that crying will bring "that Mommy person" to help him.
  Mikey: Crying. I can definitely handle crying. (cue montage of baby crying to Janis Joplin's "Cry Baby")
  • Somewhere in the montage is an exhausted Molly prepping both a bottle and coffee in the middle of the night. She carefully pours coffee into the baby bottle and tests it on her wrist before realizing what she's done.

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