Quick note before we get started: This list is copied from my live-tweet session (@Aw Sam Weston), sorted in chronological order with minor edits for spelling, formatting, and clarity.
- Thinking a little about film history. I should probably rewatch Snow White, since it's important and I haven't seen it since I was like 7.
- Wow. I forgot how incredibly 30s this feels.
- These musical numbers, though. Much less annoying than Broadway Jazz Chords or the modern Disney fare.
- And of course when she gets to the Dwarves' house, Snow White acts like the Typical 30s Female Protagonist. Stereotypes!
- Also: Monologuing at the Little Woodland Friends. I don't care when it was made, it's always corny.
- And I can definitely see the influence from the earlier Disney shorts. Wow.
- Housewife stereotypes! (And yes, I should be paying attention to the movie. Stop distracting me, brain!)
- Oh! Here are the Dwarves!
- This reminds me how The Hobbit had just been published that same year. Guess which story had a more lasting impact? (Hint: Tolkien's) [It here that I replayed the Heigh Ho number. Best part.]
- Snow White and the Eleven Dwarves: Happy, Dopey, Sleepy, Bashful, Sneezy, Grumpy, Doc, Sleazy, Scuzzy, Wheezy, and Schmo.
- And yes, I'm aware the movie is "Dwarfs." I still follow the Tolkien conventions.
- Gawd, those mistakes/corrections are getting old fast.
- Also, little quirks do not characterization make.
- And I legitimately wonder if those "names" aren't just nicknames, like what you'd have in the military. Or among friends.
- Seriously? Monsters have low, growly voices. A little girl yawning is not enough to call it a monster.
- This is the perfect opportunity for them to pull off her clothes and have their way with her.
- Okay, that was dirty.
- How can you guess their names just from seeing their beds and faces?
- "What are you and who are you doing?" A girl, and Dwarves.
- I'm sorry [not really], these opportunities are too good to pass up.
- If the queen's Black Magic is so well-known, why hasn't she been usurped yet? Y'know, by an army to the castle?
- And again: such a 30s [or pre-60s] thing! "I can keep house for you!"
- They're dragging this hand-washing subplot way too much.
- And this is where they would kill her, if they weren't gonna rape her later.
- Wait, hand-washing is dangerous now?
- How does Grumpy know about women? I thought Dwarf Women didn't exist! They just spring out of the ground!
- This is the longest hand-washing subplot I've ever seen. Or, the only one. And why are they treating it like a bath? She just said "hands!"
- And a forced bath, at that. It's just dinner. This is unrealistic, even by 1937 standards.
- Oh! Random side-comment: Apparently Hitler did Snow White fan-art
, and he owned his own copy of the film. [Yes, I read the TV Tropes page before I started this live-tweet.]
- Oh yeah! The queen is still a threat.
- You didn't even bother to check if the heart belonged to the same species?
- Obviously Evil Books of Black Magic.
- So you're gonna prove you're the fairest of them all by making yourself uglier? Where's the logic in that?
- "A perfect disguise!" Yes, now you look even more evil!
- Yodeling Dwarves. Scarier than it sounds.
- Or at least more disturbing.
- There's clearly a heavy influence from the Silly Symphony shorts. Makes sense in the historical context, but it's still jarring.
- "That was fun!" Didn't you just show us they had fun?
- Inexplicable Rhyming up the wazoo!
- Also, implicit premarital sex [referencing] the opening scenes.
- Or maybe I'm just imagining dirty things. It's so easy [with this Hays Code stuff]!
- Their speech patterns sound so archaic. And it's only 80 years ago!
- Oh, of course she's praying. Probably in pre-Christian Germany.
- Drawn-Out Snoring Sequence!
- It's times like these when I wonder what Sleazy, Scuzzy, Wheezy, and Schmo are doing.
- How do you expect Snow White to eat an apple if it's got a giant skull over it?
- If it's for Snow White, why are you offering it to the crow?
- So you disregard the Love's First Kiss clause because... You had a bad experience [with love]?
- Also: Obviously Evil!
- She looks a lot like the ferryman from Greek mythology.
- Y'know, the one [on] the River Styx?
- "'I'll see you later' when she clearly won't" cliché!
- Do they really have to show every dwarf's quirk every frickin' time?
- Grumpy is the Only Sane Man of the bunch. He knows what's up.
- 1930s Warbling!
- Don't let those birds step on your pie! They could be disease-ridden! [Was thinking Bird Flu but, y'know, general stuff too.]
- Wait, so the old hag is Obviously Evil, and the Little Woodland Creatures are anxious, but you still trust her?! Stupid!
- And Grumpy just said not to let anyone in!
- Is Snow White an idiot? Even if she's like 12, she should still tell something's wrong when the hag's words sound too good to be true.
- There's only 10 minutes left. How do they expect to drag out the story if Snow White still hasn't eaten the apple?
- "There must be someone you love!" "Yes." You should've asked "who is it?"
- Y'know, so you can kill him.
- And of course you don't show her actually "fall asleep."
- Convenient [dramatic] rain!
- None of the dwarves stop to see if they can help Snow White? How inconsiderate!
- Gee, now would be a great time to not look like [and have the body of] an old hag.
- Disney Villain Death!
- So now that the queen's dead, who would be Fairest of Them All if Snow White didn't get her Deus ex Machina?
- You wouldn't bury her? That's gonna suck once she starts rotting.
- Also, she should be a rotten corpse by now.
- Why are the dwarves still putting flowers there if it's been fall, winter, and spring?
- And now comes Snow White the Zombie Queen!
- 1930s Pop Choir!
- Is this the first instance of the Dance Party Ending?
- "Walk Into the Sunset as the Movie Fades To Black" cliché!
- And an implied marriage, thanks to wedding bells.
- Okay, that should be it for my Snow White Live-Tweet. Maybe some other thoughts later, but... Whatever. Historical significance!
- [The movie had ended, but I gave a few final thoughts...]
- I think I spent most of that movie looking at my phone as I tweeted. Not sure what's worse: that or the movie's lack of attention-grabbing.
- I guess the movie was hard to pay attention to because I was live-tweeting.
- I didn't mention it, but that "One Song" song has some serious hints of the Doo-Wop style, which wasn't even a thing for another 10 years.
And that's it! Not sure if that's how liveblogs are done here, but that's how I'm doing it. Lemme know if I did something wrong, or if you wanna comment on my absolutely hilarious commentary (it probably wasn't).
