(Where we last left off, Rika and Tranza have watched the Scouts become the monsters. Now...)
(with Rika...)
Rika: ...oh, God...why did he?
Tranza: This is sick. Even for me...
(Radiguet sneers)
Radiguet: So. You'll now watch as the Scouts will fight against the All-Stars. No matter who wins, everyone will lose.
Rika: ...no.
Radiguet: No?
Rika: Yeah...no. And here's why. I've got a story to tell, still.
Radiguet: ...so you truly don't care about your friends.
Rika: No. Not damn true. Because I know that the All-Stars will find a way to free them!
Radiguet: ...
(he smiles)
If you knew how much wrong you are...but no matter.
(he turns to the Scouts)
Destroy the All-Stars!
Scouts: Yes, master!
(the Scouts teleport...and then the screen turns off.)
Rika: ...so. (she sports a serious look) If Radiguet thinks he can break me, he's wrong, too. For there's a chapter of bullshit beyond the typical filler shit.
(she flips through her tablet)
Previously, we finished the Turboranger "tribute", Ban and Sosuke get into detention, and other lovey-dovey shit happened. That's about it.
So we'll go forward with...
Chapter 31: Hoji's Double Dilemma
We get a very lengthy Author's Note, where it states that it's to flesh Chiharu out. Yes, this annoying, Sueish woman who just exists to be Akizuki's mouthpiece. I'm sorry, but...
(Rika exhales)
I have a...very low tolerance for Sues. Especially those who are just there for author appeal. Especially even those who don't get much of a character. I mean...if the person has a good personality (or an enjoyable one), go over-the-top in a good way, and still be a Sue...then I'm all for it, you know? I'm more of characterizations than...yeah.
But holy shit.
Oh. And it gets even better. Not only will it focus on Chiharu, but also, this chapter? Inspired (and as we all know, it means "ripped off") by the chapter "Blues of the Broken Heart". From the story Super Sentai vs. Super Sentai Another. You should be familiar from it by now...
(flashback!)
- Past!Rika: Admittedly, I haven't read Super Sentai Vs. Super Sentai, but I heard that it's really good. A lot better than...this.
(end flashback!)
Rika: And it still holds true today.
But anyway...it turns out that it's not the only plot to rip off. What else is ripped off? The "Aya has a missing daughter" storyline, which is taken from Gatchaman F. Granted, Jetman is a tribute to Gatchaman itself, but...really?
Also, something about Chiharu originally becoming the next Maria or some shit. NEXT—
(the screen turns on, and Rika and Tranza glance at it. It shows...)
(...a nearly-empty dungeon of sorts, with a sliver of moonlight piercing through a glass dome roof. The All-Stars enter, with Ryota leading the pack)
Ryota: We're getting closer. All we need to do now is to defeat Radiguet, find the other Scouts, and save Rika.
Jason: ...
Brittany: What's wrong, Jason?
Jason: I know the past few mazes were hard...but to go through everything else, it seemed ridiculously easy!
Alex: What do you mean?
Jason: I mean, there hasn't been any dangers ever since! You think Radiguet's going—
Ryota: We don't know.
(and because yours truly just loves theatrics, cue a musical spoiler, signaling that the All-Stars are in trouble)
...what the?
Tori (in a Voice of the Legion): If it isn't our old friends!
Saya: Old...friends? What?
Natsuki: I don't know, but I'm not liking this!
Dan (in a raspy voice): Not liking what? The idea of seeing us again?
(then thunder crashes, and lightning strikes the ground)
Rin: ...oh, my God...(she prepares her katana, the poor girl just completely shaking) Just who are you guys?
Ryota: Yeah! Show yourselves!
Sean: Wish...granted.
(And then, all six of the Fallen Scouts leap onto the ground, shocking the All-Stars. Sean is sporting a very unhinged Slasher Smile, Mao is just grinning darkly, Dan charges up a Shadow Ball, Xander calmly walks forward with vines following him, Mako just looks psychotic with a maddeningly giggle fit to boot, and Tori charges up a water attack.)
(Ryota is in fear of his former friends, Brittany and Alex are in shock over what's going on, Jason is trying to figure out a way to snap them back out of it, Rin and Natsuki are still scared themselves, and Saya just stares in silence. As for Christopher? A mixture of concern...as well as just getting pissed off for what's happening to his friends)
Christopher: Guys. What the fuck happened to you?
Mao (in a deeper voice): The Scouts you knew...will no longer exist. We are reborn.
Ryota: R-reborn?
Xander (in an icy tone): Yeah. As monsters, we challenged the Scouts. But now...we're more powerful than you ever imagined!
Mao: And if you want to face Radiguet, you'll need to face us first!
(she strikes with lightning, stunning Rin and Brittany)
Alex: That's quite enough! (he has his katana wreathed in flame) We'll take you down—
Jason: What?!
Rin: You mean, they're too far gone?
Alex: I think so. I mean, you heard them!
Jason: Not necessarily...I think we'll need to defend ourselves. Just because they're being controlled, doesn't mean that we can't have them break free.
(to Alex and Ryota) Do you remember?
Ryota: Yeah...but that was because of you and Sean!
Jason: The point is, the spell can be broken once. It can be done again. This time, we'll have to figure out a way!
Sean: Enough talk! (he fires a stream of flame at Jason and Ryota, striking at them) LET'S GO, COWARDS!
(he strikes again with a flamethrower, until Christopher blocks it)
Christopher: Sean. Dude, this isn't like you! You remember all the good times we had?
Sean: Good times?! (he laughs insanely) Like I remember.
Matoi: I think it's time to know what it truly means to be honorable! (stares coldly at Sean)
Ryota: ...! (he looks at Mao) Mao, please snap out of it.
Mao: The Mao you know will be dead. By your hands.
Saya: Xander, Tori, Dan...
Natsuki: I don't want for you guys to fall to evil again! Please stop...
Tori: Who cares, you traitors?
Dan: You'll die for defying our master.
Brittany: Mako...
Rin: This is too weird!
Mako: Time to catch my prey! (giggles)
Ryota: ...everyone...
Christopher: It's time to make a show of courage! (pauses) I can't believe I fuckin' said that.
Sean: Your silly words are meaningless. Time to die!
(and so, the All-Stars fight against the Fallen Scouts. Christopher, Matoi, and Jason team up to fight against Sean; Ryota against Mao, Rin, Brittany, and Alex against Mako; and Natsuki and Saya against Xander, Dan, and Tori. The battle so far? Rather lopsided, with the Fallen Scouts using their elemental powers to strike at the heroes)
(Rika is forced to watch the fight, but she still holds out hope, as she always does)
Rika: This can't end this way. I mean...it simply can't.
(she looks at her tablet)
...I gotta focus on my work...I gotta hold out hope for the others! Gotta stay strong!
So the story begins at the U.A.O.E, where Abrella finds out that the weakness to the USSPRA is, of all things...Hoji's broken heart. I am not kidding. And since we have to have a Villain of the Arc, it's their turn to do the "hating the fact that they have an intruder, and they strike a deal" thing. Because...
(Rika shrugs)
Enter our Villain of the Arc, a Mikean. His name is Nick, but he now calls himself "Revenger". Like a certain other word with "revenge" in it, it's either stupidly awesome or awesomely stupid. You see, he denounced his name ever since Clord, his friend, died.
And what's his powers? To have the victims seek revenge, of course! He demonstrates it to Kiros and Trakeena, making them see...yeah. Also, the first mention of the Lightspeed Rangers, though not directly.
...
I really, really hope to God that they will not get butchered in the story, if it ever happens. If they are, I will flip my shit. Horribly.
Trakeena and Kiros are amazed by the power, which causes Abrella to show Revenger to RINO. Abrella says that he doesn't think Hoji really loves Chiharu, but RINO is impatient, for there's the Fiveman world to fuck up—er, I mean do some evil plots with. That's where Abrella tells RINO what we already know—wait.
- Revenger: "I used to be called Nick but not anymore. I worked with Clord and he was deleted. I would like to take my part. I can trigger the feelings of vengeance in anybody."
...first "revenge", and now "vengeance". Fuck it, I've waited long enough, I'll call this guy "Revengeancer"!
RINO flips out, wondering what it all has to do with Chiharu, but Abrella tells him all the bullshit about how she looks like Teresa. Oh, and he pretty much spoiled the "secret", even though it wasn't a fucking secret to begin with.
After talking about the plan, and how different Teresa and Chiharu are (spoilers: the former's sickly, the latter's not), RINO...blasts cardboard cutouts of the Dekarangers? Huh? Abrella confirms that the plan will go well, and he'll have Kiros help out.
...oy.
Cut to the courts, where Commander Asshole is given his sentence. For his mutiple crimes, he'll spend the rest of his life in hard labor. And by that, I mean "he gets to pound out rocks". With a...small hammer?
...
Why am I imagining one of those dinky ones?
As Commander Asshole screams out some "no"s, Hoji muses over what would have happened had they not intervened. And some stupid bullshit about how the Samurai Rangers are, yes, "not exactly Samurai". WE GET IT, POWER RANGERS SAMURAI SUCKS.
After Jayden gushes over S!Takeru, we get a scene with Hoji carrying the birth certificate of his current girlfriend, again beaten over the heads that Chiharu is Aya's daughter.
You know what that means, kids.
- Take a shot of every single mention about how Chiharu is Aya's daughter.
Hoji has since moved on with his life, but little does he know that the old flame is about to ignite once more. In ways he can't ever imagine.
(Rika drinks)
(during the fight, Saya and Natsuki combine their powers to try to form a protective wall around them. The ground manages to knock Tori's team off their feet)
Natsuki: What are we going to do?
Saya: Try to survive the best we can!
(Ryota and Mao slash at each other with their Gokai Swords. They're evenly matched when the former catches up, but then...)
Mao: Let's make this fun. (her sword then is wreathed in lightning)
Ryota: M-Mao!
(with a scream, Mao frantically slashes at Ryota)
(meanwhile, Sean and Christopher battle it out with the former's fire attacks and the latter's psychic attacks. Matoi and Jason assist the Red Space Ranger actor...)
Christopher: Y-you asked for it...LET'S ROCKET!
(by pressing 3-3-5, Christopher morphs into the Red Space Ranger itself)
Matoi: CHAKUSOU!
(Matoi then becomes Go Red)
Jason: GOKAI CHANGE!
Mobirates: GOOOOOOOOOOOO~KAIGER!
(Jason morphs into Gokai Green, still having the same morpher he had before)
Sean: Heh...(his voice then takes on an even more demonic tone, and his eyes grow dark red) Your silly costumes won't be enough to stop me! Over time, your friend will perish! His soul will be gone...forever!
Christopher/Matoi/Jason: Huh?!
Sean: And so will the rest of the Scouts!
Christopher: ...
(he is starting to break)
You motherfucker. You are so dead.
(with a yell, Christopher charges at Sean, only for him to be attacked viciously by a deadly Fire Blast)
Rika: We see Teresa in the nunnery, and we find out that she didn't go near Hoji when he visited the cemetery once. She goes about her daily routine until Abrella and Revengeancer spy on her, and they disguise as humans so they can see her. They talk until the two villains reveal themselves.
...also, Teresa goes on to say about how her brother pretty much deserved to be deleted. Uh...
TIME FOR BACKSTORY!
I'll stop the plot so I can say what the hell's going on. You see, Teresa, like Revengeancer, is a Mikean who once fell in love with Hoji. She also happened to be some sort of an idol singer. But she had a terminal illness, one that Clord wanted to cure. And how would he accomplish such a goal?
Kidnap girls, of course. (Rika just gives a "the fuck?" look)
While his goals were...really, can I really justify saying that they're noble when the ways to do it are very much not? Regardless, Clord got deleted, and this makes Teresa swear an oath of celibacy. And that's exactly what happened.
Anyway...back to our story. Revengeancer uses his powers to fill Teresa with, you guessed it, vengeance. Also, another nun appears until Abrella blasts her into ashes.
(Rika is sickened)
Fucking seriously?! I just...
As Teresa is now under control, we get a scene where Kimberly is listening to one of the songs until Hoji...for whatever reason...turns the CD off. Why? No answer! This makes Kimberly angry, and she decides to listen to the music with the iPod instead.
(Rika clears her throat)
PRODUCT PLACEMENT KITAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
(she drinks)
Tranza: I'm surprised you didn't lose your voice this time!
Rika: Practice.
Oh, wait. Turns out that the song is just bringing back memories of his first girlfriend. Dude, didn't you move on? I mean, what the hell? I suppose this is just a Conflict Ball...
Chiharu thanks Hoji, but he just remains silent. And the whole comparisons thing just gets repeated over and over to the point of insanity. So after that, we get some scenes of Chiharu becoming a helper in the Dekaranger labs, with Swan, remaining out of the picture until all that with Teresa happened. So the girl decides not to accept Hoji's proposal, and the guy's still perplexed.
...you know, I wonder why the hell Akizuki chose the girl to be Hoji's lover, aside from the obvious.
After a scene where Hoji, Kimberly, S!Takeru, Masumi, and Jasmine patrol, and Kimberly still fuming over Hoji's rudeness, Teresa shows up. This causes Deka Blue to nearly break, and as he speaks to her, she gets angry over her former lover killing her brother. Also, she's firing at Hoji, now with the powers of a Vyram.
...uh...
Then Kiros shows up, and he and S!Takeru go on and on about confusions and Mako, and all that other bullshit. I'm sorry, but...I just want to get this damn story over with.
Kiros then tells S!Takeru about how Hoji's a murderer, how the obvious facts are stated, blah blah blah, JUST FUCKING FIGHT ALREADY!!
(Rika rubs her temples)
Kimberly and Jasmine, transformed into their Ranger/Sentai Warrior forms (and ignoring the typo of the latter becoming the Yellow Space Ranger), beat the Mooks. Teresa turns ghastly as the control still continues on, and Hoji tries to snap her out of it. However, the situation grows dire, causing S!Takeru to have everyone retreat.
Oh, and where was Revengeancer all this time? He was invisible. And he's happy that the plan's working. However, Kiros is still thinking about Mako, and he tells the ally that Kimberly should be brought to RINO unharmed. And they go on and on about them...and I'm really realizing just how unhealthy their obsessions are.
:/
(back to the fight...)
Mako: Come out, come out, wherever you are! (giggles manically as she uses Razor Wind at some conveniently-placed pillars...the ones where Alex, Brittany, and Rin are hiding behind)
Alex: On the count of 3, we strike. Ready? One...
Rin: ...two...
(then before Brittany counts to "three", the Razor Wind attack slashes the pillars down, knocking the three to the ground)
Brittany: What now?!
Alex: ...hm. (he looks at Rin) You think you can handle it?
Rin: I-I'll try to strike back...(she stands up, and she concentrates)
Brittany: We'll be right beside you!
(Rin then feels the Shodo Phone materializing in her hand, awakening her Hidden Power)
Rin: IPPITSU SOUJOU!
(Rin then becomes Shinken Pink, complete with her own Shinkenmaru, and the two ladies clash)
(with Natsuki and Saya...)
Natsuki: ...I think it's time to wear them down, do you think?
Saya: Yeah...we must.
(Natsuki prepares herself, and she stomps on the ground, creating a bit of magnitude. This shakes Tori's team, and Saya uses her Petal Dance to confuse them)
It's working!
(...then...with a grin, Dan vanishes, only to reappear again behind Natsuki. He uses Shadow Sneak to strike her, making her fall as well)
Dan: It's no use against us!
(the heroes are just getting beaten up, and Ryota coughs as Mao stabs him in the arm)
Ryota: They're too strong...
Alex: I think, if the worst does come...we have to kill them. So that way, they can rest in peace...
Rin: But there has to be another way!
(Christopher groans, and then...)
???: HELP US! PLEASE!
(a familiar voice enters his mind, and Christopher is just holding his head, screaming in pain)
Jason: Chris, did you get something?!
Matoi: What's wrong?
Christopher: ...what the fuck was...
???: WE'RE HERE! PLEASE...HELP!
(Christopher continues to be in pain, the telepathy part of his powers being too much for him)
Matoi: ...
When you're ready, please...let us know. (he watches Christopher, completely concerned)
Rika: ...hoo boy.
In the New Skybase, we get a scene with Hoji continuing to break, until Chiharu snaps him out of it. Aya tells the team that they must take the time to fix the issue, and guess what? Chiharu decides to join in, too!
...meh.
After Aya becomes proud of her daughter, Hoji gathers the group. He actually speaks some lines in English, before he reverts back to Japanese.
...
So why didn't they have him become a translator for the Rangers, again? And, in fact, this brings a hell of a lot of Fridge Logic towards the "Rangers speaking Japanese" thing!
Hoji tells the story, the one I already told you guys, and he apologizes to Kimberly. She forgives him. And yes, she, too, says it in English!
I just...I give up. Really, I do.
Also, about Hoji, he gave up some sort of status because he couldn't stop thinking about Teresa. Yeah, remember the bits in Kickboxing Academy where the whole "forgetting the past" thing was shoved down our throats a bit, then completely broken by a couple of the characters' actions? Even one that's all sudden? This falls into the exact same brand of bad storytelling.
And to end this scene, Jasmine is able to use a camera trick. How the hell she brought a camera to the fight, I don't even know. Still, Hoji sees something that's like strings, and he's really happy to find it out. Chiharu has a plan, too.
...
Also, do you know who else has a plan? The U.A.O.E. Abrella thinks that Hoji will have to end Teresa's life, to the point where Chiharu rejects him. The villains celebrate, but RINO ruins it by telling them that it's too early for that. Dude...what?
As if things can't get any weirder, RINO tells them to work on their goal a biiiiiit harder. And...Kiros is sneezing? Uh...what? Also, RINO is thinking about intervening with missions soon...
(Rika looks at the audience with a confused look on her face)
Was all that supposed to be hilarious? Because it's just making everyone look fucking stupid!
So, in the city, Revengeancer continues to wreak havoc and shit. As for Hoji, his teammates wish him luck, and they would be able to beat the monster once he gets everything under control. They head over, and Hoji tries to talk some sense into his ex-girlfriend, but she calls him a liar.
...eventually...Teresa snaps out of it for a little while, asking her ex-boyfriend to help her. Turns out that they didn't reverse her, but rather, the strings became a bit...loose.
...at this point, it's not worth questioning, kids.
Just as soon as that's done, Hoji senses someone. He shoots, and in the process, he reveals Revengeancer.
- Revengeancer: "What the? I'm revealed."
...you know, I really don't want to repeat how stupid it is when...gah. My brain hurts.
Revengeancer then tries to control Teresa again, but Hoji transforms into Deka Blue, activates SWAT Mode, and shoots the shit out of the monster. This officially frees his ex-girlfriend, and she's told to run away, which she does. By also using his badge to judge Revengeancer, the monster's also confirmed guilty, which you know what this means.
...what? Trapping him inside a containment card? Ha, no. It simply means that, with the help of S!Takeru and the others, they combine their powers into the Mougyu Bazooka, which finishes off Revengeancer.
OR IS IT?
Nope, because Abrella installed a Dimensional Bug, which causes the defeated monster to grow. The problem this time? There isn't really a combination for all of those Rangers. That is, until Ban shows up with the Dekawingers and the other Dekarangers. Hoji and Jasmine rejoin the leader, and they form the Dekawing Robo. And how is Revengeancer defeated, you ask? Rather anticlimatically.
Namely, after forming the robot, the Dekawing Robo sends the monster into space, and it executes a finishing move. What finishing move? I don't know, either, since no specifics are given, but I'd presume it may be a Groin Attack. Regardless, this destroys Revengeancer once and for all.
After a scene with RINO throwing a bitchfit over the loss yet again, we go back to the hospital. From there, Teresa is trying to recover from the mental stress, until Ban and Hoji visit her. The latter decides to patch things up with his ex-girlfriend, and she tells him that the reason why she was at the monastery in the first place is to help him ease the pain.
...uh...yeah, that clearly did not make things better.
Teresa decides that once she's recovered, she'll go back to her home planet and try to forget more of the pain. And worse yet? She'll still succumb to her disease. Chiharu tells her that she can start to reach out to more people before that time comes, and she promises to do so.
And then the doctor arrives, and he tells them that they need to leave so he can check up on her further. By the way, I did skip one part of the Author's Note where it says that her final fate is left up to the viewer to decide. And from the way things are going, all signs point to..."fuck it, she's not going to be mentioned again, BYYYYYYYYYE!"
...too inappropriate? If so, sorry.
And so, our chapter ends with Hoji thinking about the past...when he was taught to forget about it. Yeah, I think this needs another round of my favorite game.
(Rika slams her head into a wall for several minutes)
(...later...)
There, now I'm done.
Chiharu snaps Hoji out of it, and she invites him to dinner, which causes S!Takeru to remember that he needs to help out. This chapter closes with the two lovebirds in an embrace.
(Rika sighs)
Fleshing out Chiharu nothing. She's still one-note, and really? Aside from pointing out the damn obvious and being a love interest, she didn't do anything else of note. This focused more on Hoji and Teresa, and dear God, did it show. Did it ever show.
...at least it can't get any worse, right?
(Rika then sees that in the next chapter...a certain Red Conqueror makes his appearance for the first time in God knows how long...and Houka does something stupid)
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
(in the battle, Christopher is trying to ease his headache)
Brittany: Chris? What's up?
Christopher: ...I hear them.
Brittany: "Them"?
Christopher: Yeah. I still hear our friends. They...
(with a grunt, Christopher continues to hear the Scouts' screams)
They're there somewhere! We just gotta figure out where!
(Sean then laughs)
...what's so fuckin' funny? You imposter?
(Sean then stares at Christopher)
Sean: Oh, Chris...how could you say that to yer best friend?
Ryota: ...did he just...?
Rin: He's not the only one. When we faced Mako...
Sean: That's right.
(and then, right in front of the All-Stars, the transformation from human to monster slowly begins, first with Sean's hair taking on a red-orange color and glow. For Dan, he's surrounded in shadow; Mao's hair starts to spike up in ridiculous ways, Mako's outfit turns into a hot pink and her hair into Princess Curls, Tori starts to have her entire body into a watery form, and Xander is starting to get covered in vines. And then, on their foreheads, the Fallen Scouts have the stones with the elements...)
Ryota: Oh, my—
Matoi: Please say that our friends aren't too far gone yet...
Seakire: Oh, soon they will! And ya will fall, too!
(the All-Stars prepare for their toughest fight so far...not just because of the enemies, but also because of the obvious, the possibility that they'll never see their Scouts again)
Will the All-Stars manage to defeat the Fallen Scouts and restore them? Will Rika get over the stupidity? And what will happen in the Fiveman "tribute"?
Emergency Signal; Now, Forward! To the next liveblogging of Super Sentai vs. Power Rangers!!
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