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[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6434785/1/Crystal_and_the_Diamonds Crystal and the Diamonds]] is a notoriously bad [[SelfInsertFic Self Insert Fic]] written by [[http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2447825/Hrvatska Hrvatska]] who claims that the aim of her stories is to show just how great Croatia is to the rest of the world. And she's failing. Badly.

The main character, 'Crystal Turquoise' is an awful [[MarySue Mary Sue]] while the rest of the characters just follow her around as she goes from country to country doing nothing in particular.

There is a plot floating around in there somewhere, mostly about how she gets put into a band to compete in ''Series/TheXFactor''. There's also a time machine that has been built and they are trying to go back in time and fix something (but just end up ruining it by shooting Churchill). Most of the time however, the plot is held up so the story can go into an insanely racist [[AuthorTract Author Tract]] about why Serbians are bad or some other inane thing.
It's also unfinished as of yet, even though it currently has 31 chapters, so expect more of this.

to:

[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6434785/1/Crystal_and_the_Diamonds Crystal and the Diamonds]] is a notoriously bad [[SelfInsertFic Self Insert Fic]] written by [[http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2447825/Hrvatska Hrvatska]] who claims that the aim of her stories is to show just how great Croatia is to the rest of the world. And she's failing. Badly.

The main character, 'Crystal Turquoise' is an awful [[MarySue Mary Sue]] while the rest of the characters just follow her around as she goes from country to country doing nothing in particular.

world.

There is a plot floating around in there somewhere, mostly about how she gets put into a band to compete in ''Series/TheXFactor''. There's also a time machine that has been built and they are trying to go back in time and fix something (but just end up ruining it by shooting Churchill). Most of the time however, the plot is held up so the story can go into an insanely racist [[AuthorTract Author Tract]] about why Serbians are bad or some other inane thing.
It's also unfinished as of yet, even though it currently has 31 chapters, so expect more of this.
personal tracts]].



* AuthorAvatar: Crystal
* AuthorFilibuster: The author does not like Serbians, so every once in a while she writes into the story something about Serbians being evil or some other garbage.

to:

* %%* AuthorAvatar: Crystal
* AuthorFilibuster: The author does not like Serbians, so every once in a while she writes into the story something about Serbians being evil or some other garbage.such diatribe.



* GratuitousGerman

to:

* %%* GratuitousGerman



* LoadsAndLoadsOfCharacters
* MultinationalTeam

to:

* %%* LoadsAndLoadsOfCharacters
* %%* MultinationalTeam



* SelfInsertFic

to:

* %%* SelfInsertFic



* Time Travel

to:

* %%* Time Travel


* YeOldeButcheredeEnglishe - Everything Matt says comes out like this.

to:

* YeOldeButcheredeEnglishe - YeOldeButcheredeEnglishe: Everything Matt says comes out like this.


->"wtf Michael stop acting like a Serb and bein' so god damn racist" I said.
->"Eh? I'm not being tracist, Canadians can't be racist because all Canadians are half-French and half-British".
->"Yeah but French and British are the most racist of them all," I said, "So being both would make you like, a double racist."
-->Crystal talking to Michael Bublé

to:

->"wtf ->''"wtf Michael stop acting like a Serb and bein' so god damn racist" I said.
->"Eh?
said.''
->''"Eh?
I'm not being tracist, Canadians can't be racist because all Canadians are half-French and half-British".
->"Yeah
half-British".''
->''"Yeah
but French and British are the most racist of them all," I said, "So being both would make you like, a double racist."
-->Crystal
"''
-->-- '''Crystal
talking to Michael Bublé
Bublé'''


There is a plot floating around in there somewhere, mostly about how she gets put into a band to compete in [[TheXFactor the X-Factor]]. There's also a time machine that has been built and they are trying to go back in time and fix something (but just end up ruining it by shooting Churchill). Most of the time however, the plot is held up so the story can go into an insanely racist [[AuthorTract Author Tract]] about why Serbians are bad or some other inane thing.

to:

There is a plot floating around in there somewhere, mostly about how she gets put into a band to compete in [[TheXFactor the X-Factor]].''Series/TheXFactor''. There's also a time machine that has been built and they are trying to go back in time and fix something (but just end up ruining it by shooting Churchill). Most of the time however, the plot is held up so the story can go into an insanely racist [[AuthorTract Author Tract]] about why Serbians are bad or some other inane thing.


* AuthorAppeal: [[TheXFactor The X-Factor]] and [[WorldWarTwo World War Two]]? Why not?

to:

* AuthorAppeal: [[TheXFactor [[Series/TheXFactor The X-Factor]] and [[WorldWarTwo [[UsefulNotes/WorldWarTwo World War Two]]? Why not?


* WinstonChurchill: He gets shot by Marko. Multiple times. His only place in this story is to die over and over.

to:

* WinstonChurchill: UsefulNotes/WinstonChurchill: He gets shot by Marko. Multiple times. His only place in this story is to die over and over.


[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6434785/1/Crystal_and_the_Diamonds Crystal and the Diamonds]] is a notoriously bad [[SelfInsertFic Self Insert Fic]] written by Hrvatska, who claims that the aim of her stories is to show just how great Croatia is to the rest of the world. And she's failing. Badly.

to:

[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6434785/1/Crystal_and_the_Diamonds Crystal and the Diamonds]] is a notoriously bad [[SelfInsertFic Self Insert Fic]] written by Hrvatska, [[http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2447825/Hrvatska Hrvatska]] who claims that the aim of her stories is to show just how great Croatia is to the rest of the world. And she's failing. Badly.



It's also unfinished as of yet, even though it currently has 23 (!) chapters, so expect more of this.

to:

It's also unfinished as of yet, even though it currently has 23 (!) 31 chapters, so expect more of this.


* AuthorAppeal: [[TheXFactor The X-Factor]] and [[WorldWarTwo World War Two]]? Why not?



* FanficChopSuey: [[TheXFactor The X-Factor]] and [[WorldWarTwo World War Two]]? Why not?


* WallBanger: Too many to count.

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