Fight Scenes for the Inexperienced

So, I have recently realized that unless I want to cut out all the action in my current story, I'm going to have to learn how to write a decent fight scene. However, that poses a bit of a problem — I have never read a fight scene that I've actually liked, and have no idea what I like in fight scenes in general. Which means a whole shitload of exploratory writing for me.

With that in mind, what do you think is the best sort of exercises to learn how to write a fight scene? Should I just take two random characters, put them in a bar or something and have them fight, or is there something that has the hope of being more productive? What sort of writing/"staging" skills should I try out? Is there anything I should take note of before starting?

edited 8th Apr '11 5:47:59 AM by Dec

There's a few different ways to go about it.

One of my favourites is to imply the events of the fight as you set it up, ending that section of the text with a declaration of action, such as "and then she pulled the trigger". Since you've already described the situation in detail, the reader will have an idea of what could happen while benefiting from the tension of your existing setup. You can describe the conclusion later, which pieces it all together to create a "true" version of events. That way, you get the best of your own imagination and the audience's imagination.

Overall, I think the trick is not to get too detailed, perhaps unless you're writing from a first-person perspective or implying a temporary shift to that perspective. You want to first have an idea of the general sequence of events and their significance within the fight. Try to make the conflict a miniature narrative in itself, like a choreographer in a film. There needs to be a setup, middle, climax and conclusion — three acts plus an aftermath. You can express it as briefly or at as much length as you like, but keep the objective of the sequence in mind. You want to produce something narratively satisfying for the audience without fatiguing them.

You could look on Youtube for real-life fights of a similar nature. Eg, if you want to show the Old Master easily defeating someone, there are hordes of 'stupid criminal meets martial artist' videos. Or if you want to show two inexperienced fighters going at each other, or two highly-trained fighters, or swordfighting, etc.

But the action won't translate nearly as well on paper as it does in video. I think the main problem here, and what Dec id asking, is how to write a good fight scene on paper. Which incidentally is advice that I too am looking for.

One of my best friends (who's a reader, not a writer, but she knows what she likes) gave me some great advice regarding fight scenes that I think's really useful: No matter how flowery you like your prose (and I like it pretty darn flowery), fight scenes are a place for short, crisp sentences, equally short paragraphs, and not a lot of dialogue. Which is not to say you can't get creative with your word choice, but fight scenes should generally be clear, and long, drawn-out sentences (like this one) slow the pace most of the time. Be quick and snappy with the way you write.

She wasn't talking about me, but actually ranting about the Bartimaeus books, but there you go. I found it good advice, and am trying to follow it.

And hey; just practicing writing fight scenes sounds like a fine idea to me. Just write some blurbs. Should be good.

Read movie scripts — look at how the actiony fight scenes are written: nice, succulent and crisp. Try writing like this, and make sure every one of your words carries weight. If you want to intersperse character thoughts, make it brief as to not interrupt the fast pace flow.

^^ That's actually fairly accurate to what I've read and written before in literary fight scenes. Quick sentences denoting actions. Nothing super detailed like "He posed up for the second strike in the Eagle Crane style, rose his left fist high into the air and came crashing down with the fury of a thousand suns into his foe's skull." That's just overly dramatic, too long and way too purple-y.

Good action sentences amount to things like "She lined him up in the sights of her sniper rifle and pulled the trigger dropping him with a hit to his head." Can be longer in word count but otherwise conveys the action simplistically and accurately.

Beware of Beige Prose however when writing actions unless they need to be observing the Law of Conservation of Detail. Like say you have a sniper who almost never misses. Don't cloud his actions with lovingly detailed actions of him sighting in and killing foes one by one in a big scene. Just outright say things like "One by one he dropped his foes with a single shot" and move on to other more important details of the scene.

edited 8th Apr '11 12:11:51 PM by MajorTom

What is your media? What are the emotions going on at the time?

Personally I'd recommend this by Writing Excuses, because they know more about fight scenes than me. >.>

edited 8th Apr '11 2:34:51 PM by EldritchBlueRose

Fascinating: I'm working on a story and I really need/want to write good fight scenes, seeing how many of my characters, especially The Hero and his mentor, is more or less a professional assasin.

This is one of the scenes I wrote, involving an inexperienced hitman and Herman, The Hero's father:

''Larson was incredulous; a bookish man in his forties who were at least two feet shorter than him and half his weight was telling him to back off. The corner of his lips twitched, ready to form a smirk, while cracking his knuckles.

What he didn't see coming was a firm grab on his right arm and a quick swipe below his legs. With a loud thud, he fell on his back, his smug expression long gone. Just as he tried to figure out what happen, his thoughts are disturbed by a brutal heel to his ribcage, instantly breaking few ribs.''

And so it goes. What do you think of it? Can anyone tell me what's the correct term for the ribs and ribcage and all?

yay this will help me. (my work has alot of action)

How would you make an alot out of action? "Action" is an abstract ides.

Basically, it's an alot made up of many action movies. The bottom part has graey-tinted Chuck Norris pictures.

On topic: actually, I was wondering about this too. Only three of the five characters fight, but they all have varied fighting styles. The one I'm having troubles with is the White Mage (later Red Mage) Fawn. I need a way to use magic abilities in the story and yet refrain from lapsing into Shaped Like Itself descriptions.

Only priests and priests-in-training can use magic, which limits it to three characters, but since one gets a lot of page time it's important that I get this down. And then there's enemy action. It's not like an RPG where they take turns attacking- it all happens at one time. Unfortunately, I can't do that with books.

Thanks so much

Well, I have a technique for that: Write some of the moves, then go to describe the reactions or sudden thoughts of the character you have the focus on. It's kinda hard to describe how does that work, but it's something like this:

"Alice rushed against Bob, clashing her sword with all her strenght against his'. Her eyes lit in fire as she slashed furiously. She would avenge her sister's death, even if it meant dying along with Bob"

(Note that I'm not a native english speaker, so if you find any grammar mistake, feel free to correct me)

1) I have a Master of Illusion planned out, how can I say one of his attacks or even his whole appearance at one area was in fact an illusion? Just say that?

2) How to describe the clashing of swords in a fight in an interesting way?

edited 9th Apr '11 11:51:45 PM by NickTheSwing

When swords do cool things, they whistle in the air (according to Tropeland), so make a note of the sound and visual effect.

A lot of the better sword martial arts are amazing to watch because of the efficiency of the swordsmen; sometimes they're so efficient that you don't understand how one blade bypassed another or came to rest in a certain place.

Ignoring the hilarious link in response to my minor grammar fail... actually I'm not sure what I was going to say so I'll think of something.

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I've also heard from published authors that the short, clean and crisp sentences work the best, but I have always wondered about much longer sustained combat scenes.

It is much easier when you write how the unnamed narrator from The Time Machine by H.G. Wells smashed in some white Gorilla thing with a crowbar, it's another thing completely to write a full on battle sequence of a strike team moving on foot into a base to sabotage the defenses undetected, but then losing their cover under stealth in an orgy of close combat and shotgun blasts.

Or at least for me it is that way. Some of my sequences have lasted as much as 20 exhausting minutes in Universe, and it can be hard to translate the fatigue and desperation of the good guys at times.

Then again, maybe I am trying too hard to epic when I run into those. Regardless, it's damn fun.

Hrm. Well, to toss my two cents into the ring (and mix a metaphor to the point of mangling), I've found that there are three elements that are extremely helpful to keep strongly in mind when writing a fight scene. They are (in no particular order) Pacing, flow, and blocking (and no, not blocking attacks- more on that in a sec). Bear in mind that, as in any other aspect of writing, there is no silver bullet; no magic three-step way of doing everything perfectly. But these are quite useful.

Random aside- as an unabashed lover of superhuman abilities and superheroics, my fight scenes have a strong tendency to be on the scale where the property damage is measured in wrecked buildings, or even wrecked cities, rather than the wrecked furniture of more prosaically-scaled battles, but the principles tend to scale well enough.

ONE: Pacing. Put simply, a battle should have a certain intensity. Even the most one-sided of CurbStompBattles will have it; it's just that it will all be on one side in those cases . Keep your verbs snappy and your sentences crisp, and you'll be a good deal of the way towards this- Purple Prose is not your friend here (generally speaking). Drive, energy, call it what you will, but a fight scene that is enjoyable to read will have it in abundance. That being said, don't be afraid of a bit of descriptiveness- a sharp metaphor can save you a lot of verbiage- "blow after blow slammed out, crosscuts, jabs and body-blows crashing into his reeling opponent" works, but "a howling hurricane of hits hammered his staggering enemy" gets pretty much the same message across without slowing the action as much- also illustrating another minor trick that can be handy if not overused- alliteration can speed a sentence up somewhat, keeping the pacing brisk.

Please note that it is possible to have a superb slow-paced fight scene; however, the intensity still needs to be there for it to work as a 'fight'. The conflict has to be maintained.

TWO: Flow. While this may sound similar to 'pacing' above, the two are fairly distinct- a scene may flow beautifully while having terrible pacing, and vice versa. Flow is, in essence, how smoothly the action runs. For example, you want to be very careful of scene shifts during fights- unless they parallel the fight in some clear way, they will often foul both pacing and flow. I suppose, in a way, flow is how pacing (above) and blocking (below) interact. If both pacing and blocking are good, the flow will typically be good. As I type, I'm realizing that I've kind of lost the thread of my thought with this one, so I'll let it lie for now.

THREE: Blocking. I'm using this in the theatrical sense- know where your players and scenery are in relation to one another. Unless both combatants are teleporters, they're not going to be popping randomly around the landscape; they'll have to move between point A and point B to get at/away from one another. A lot of fictional fights will involve the combatants moving a great deal- one character that I've been writing a lot lately is a Fragile Speedster with superhuman agility, so it can make the blocking interesting. Not a lot more to be said about this one- if you don't have the scene laid out clearly in your mind, it will be hard to write a good fight.

To sum up: keep the intensity up- make sure your readers know that there is a strong conflict happening. Be aware of the speed of events- try to keep the narrative matching that pace (if your description of a one-tenth-of-a-second punch takes a minute and a half to read, you're likely doing it wrong, unless you're trying for the literary equivalent of Bullet Time). And make sure that where your characters are and the way they get from place to place matches what they're supposed to be able to do, what they're supposed to be trying to do, and where they're supposed to be.

Good fight scenes are dynamic. In visual media this can be emphasised by changing the camera angle and zoom level, but similar techniques can be used in writing. The third person omnicient viewpoint works best for this. Picture the fight in your head, and describe it as though you were that dynamic camera. Then accompany the zoomed in sections, seen through one characters eyes with the thoughts of that character, this can be the same character every time or it can change as well. Remember, the ability to show thoughts is a major advantage of writen works over visual media, as long as it is used correctly. How do you use it correctly then? Well just keep the fight focused on the character each characters actions, observations and reactions, using their thoughts to better showcase their observations and transition them into either an action or reaction. Observations also accompany each action and reaction, as well as the lulls in which the combatants size each other up and reasses one anothers strengths. Shifts in the amount of detail described also help keep things dynamic. How much detail is needed? Well how much is each blow going to affect their respective abilies to fight, or how much does it show about the power and skill of the warrior. Any blow that changes a significant aspect of the fight should include in its description its angle of attack, point of impact and its effect, be it damage to armour or clothing, the inflicion of injury, how far its target moved and in what direction if necissary, or even just how painful it was and how far through their body the person on the receiving end felt it. Less important strikes, where their cumulative effect rather than their individual placement and number should be handled in much less detail such as a simple "they excanged blows again" followed by an assessment of their conditions before the next event occures. Involving the terrain and events from earlier in the fight can also keep it dynamic and draw the whole thing together. As you have probaly noticed reading this, I tend to end up writing blocks of text in most cases, but I find this formate has made it easy to put my fight scenes at least into a good sentance/paragraph structure. Here is an example from a thread post of mine using this format of fight scene:

A lone Thracian warrior was sitting on a sandy beach with his back to a limestone plateau. He had been washed ashore as the sun was getting low in the sky the previous day when his ship went down. He did not know what happened to the other Thracians who he had been sailing with. He had only had time to find a nice safe place to rest before nightfall. Fortunately he still had his weapons with him and was regaining his strength.

Just then he heard a sound. It was coming from atop the plateau. He listened closer. It was footsteps, and they were getting closer! He got to his feet and moved away from the lower edge of the plateau so that he could see who it was. He hoped it was one of his fellow Thracians, and that he had found something to eat! It wasn’t, in fact it wasn’t even a Celt, or any other tribe he recognized. He was obviously a warrior himself, clad in armour, and carrying weapons of his own. The strange man saw him too. In fact he drew a bow and aimed the arrow at the Thracian, and asking him something in a language just as strange and unknown to the Thracian.

Not knowing how to respond, the Thracian decided it would be best to get his shield ready. Taking this as an intent to fight, the strange warrior fired his arrow, which struck the Thracian’s shield. The Thracian then began to make his way back to the base of the plateau since it would be more difficult for this stranger to hit him there, even as the other man loaded his second shot, and his next, and his next. He felt one of these arrows graze both the edge of his shield and his armour also, a second arrow striking the shield full on, and the last one bounce off his helmet. He had reached the plateau now and the arrows had stopped. The Thracian readied his javelin and just in time too, for the warrior had leaped from the plateau to reach him. It was the perfect opportunity. He threw his javelin at the man as he leaped. It struck him on the side with great force, but did not pierce the armour this strange man wore. Although, the Thracian did note that it had seemed to graze the man’s upper leg as well.

The stranger turned to face him now. He had in his hand a weapon not unlike his own Rhomphaia, only designed for one hand and a shield of his own in the other. The Thracian grabbed his own Rhomphaia and, dodged. The stranger had struck the side of the plateau. The Thracian returned the blow with his own, which the strange native ducked. As this man rose from his duck, he struck upwards at the Thracian’s midsection. The armour absorbed the impact, but it still hurt. The Thracian gathered all his strength for the next blow, raising his Rhomphaia overhead and striking downwards. He cleaved the strangers shield and felt the blade strike bone. Yet even as this strange native cried out in pain, he struck with his smaller weapon and separated the Thracian’s blade from its handle.

The Thracian drew back and Retrieved his own shield and unsheathed his Sica. The native let his injured arm rest and guarded it behind himself. Both warriors exchanged blows. The Thracian found the strangers armour blocked many of his blows, and those that found a weak spot were prevented from going too deep as they drew the fabric with them pinning the blade between two plates. The stranger on the other hand put three notches in his shield, two on one side and one on the other. Changing tactics the Thracian struck at the weapon, pinning it flat against his own shield and pulled disarming the man and sending the weapon off behind him and to the side with a spin.

Completing the spin that had disarmed his opponent the Thracian used its momentum to strike at the man. To his surprise the blow was deflect by some kind of sword the man seemed to have managed to draw while his back had been turned. Again the two exchanged blows, but this time the strangers weapon found purchase in one of the notches left in his shield by the weapon he had just relieved him of. Using this purchase, the man threw the Thracian off to the side and away from his shield.

Picking himself up from the sand, the Thracian saw the stranger prying free the shield from his blade. Knowing the blade was too long to face with just his sica, took the opportunity to sheath that in favour of his Labrys. The two faced each other again. The Thracian’s mighty two bitted axe dealt hefty blows to his armoured opponents body with the force of both hands behinds them. Although the native islander’s own sword found flesh enough to draw blood on several occasions as well. So the Thracian bound this sword between the upper beards of his two bits, and with a twisting motion yanked it forth from the islander’s grip. He followed this with a horizontal blow to the islander’s chest, knocking him to the ground.

Grinning the Thracian thought, I’ve got him now, and raised his axe to deal the final blow. Then he… staggered as he suddenly felt pain in his ankle. The islander was quick to roll to his feet, drawing a large dagger as he did so. He also struck at the Thracian’s shoulder with a weapon held in his injured hand which it seemed had recovered enough to be useful again while he had rested it. It was then that the Thracian learned where the pain in his ankle had come from, for he felt the same pain in his shoulder now.

So it is not over yet the Thracian thought as they came at one another again. Unfortunately for him, his Labrys proved too slow to keep up with these new weapons that struck at his vulnerable areas and left him bleeding and sore. So he circled around, drawing his sling instead and began to pelt him with stones from a distance. The islander pursued him and he treated. Soon he found himself where there fight had first begun. He knew this for he saw a stone that had been knocked loose with the stranger’s first strike with the weapon that had so reminded him of his own people’s Rhomphaia.

He scooped up this stone and hurled it with is sling. The shape was irregular and affected the path of the stone. It flew much lower than he had intended, and in tumbled through the air. Still it found a good mark, striking the islander where he had first been grazed by the Thracian’s javelin. This spot was recognizable now by the red stain that had spread from it as their battle had been fought. It was also near the man’s knee and thus created an opening when it stuck and that leg gave way. The Thracian made good use of this opening too. He lunged forward, drawing his sica, and silenced his opponent’s cry of pain by slitting open the man’s throat. Standing over the body he thought to himself, this will make a great tale to tell when I find my clansmen.

Honestly I thought that scene should've been at least four times shorter, but that could just be personal preference.

In contrast to Jinn, I think that, except for extremely brief mentions, emotions and thoughts are out of place in fight scenes. They should be kept as concise as possible so the pacing doesn't flag.

Which is just as valid an opinion as any. Again, it comes down to personal preference.

OP, what I would suggest you do (and everyone else as well) is read some action type stories, decide if you like the fight scenes or not, figure out why, and then apply what you learn to your own writing (i.e. if you think Bob's fight scenes are too fast paced, but Alice's are paced correctly, but she spends too much time describing emotions for your taste, then you can write slower, but less emotional scenes and see how that works out.)

edited 13th Aug '11 11:10:08 AM by TheEarthSheep

I have three suggestions.

First is to read the original Ian Flemming James Nind novels. If I recall, he had a no nonsense style to writing fight scenes.

Second is to use generalities about stances, movement, style, attacks amd defences. If you are choreographing for film or stage then you have to be specific, but for a written medium you can't describe it blow for blow. Give the reader the gist and let them imagine the specifics. However, write to your audience: not everyone knows terms like slip, feint, draw or even jab.

Last suggestion is to go to the UFC website or amy sports news site that reports on fights. See how they cover them, change the verbs into the present tense and play with the result.

Something to consider is what the point-of-view for your fight scene will be. If you're doing it from a first person or third person limited POV, then you need to factor in how your POV character will perceive the fight and what they consider to be the most important parts of it.

For example, a character who's had little experience with violence might have a hard time following what's going on during the fight; the order of events may be a jumble for them, and some stuff may happen too quickly for them to keep track of. On the other hand, if they're an experienced Blood Knight, they're probably gonna put a lot of detail into each blow and frequently mention the feelings of exhilaration flowing through them.

What about making it a subjective (does the term "stream of consciousness" apply?): a fighting scene that starts with the narrator as eloquent as he normally would be, but as the fight progresses he will grow less coherent and more "kill kill kill" like?