Web Video / Nigga Turtles

Nigga Turtles is a series of videos spoofing the first two Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles films, the original film and Secret of the Ooze, by it'sreal85.

The series is a dub of scenes from the films put in a new order to form its own plot that slowly grows to follow the main plot of Secret of the Ooze (Shredder's plot to fight the Turtles with Tokka and Rahzar). The characters, all voiced by itsreal85, are vastly different from their incarnations seen in the film. For example, Master Splinter is now an old drunk, and Casey Jones is a weed dealer. The city is also aware of the Turtles' existence, as they often travel to the liquor store among other venues.

The story begins In Medias Res, as the Turtles and Splinter already know April, but they attract the attention of the Foot Clan when Raphael sleeps with April, who is Shredder's niece. What follows is the Turtles' adventures as they contend with the Foot as well as their own abrasive personalities and egos.

The series is certainly NSFW, as a heads up. The original episode can be found here, and other episodes can be found on YouTube. itsreal85 now uploads the series to Worldstar Hip Hop Videos, but other YouTube users will upload the series to YouTube for him.

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This series contains examples of:

• Aborted Arc: In Episode 4, Shredder realizes the Turtles have not bothered to come looking for Splinter, and lets him go with the intent of following him straight to them. After Splinter is released, this plot point isn't followed up on, and the Turtles eventually encounter Shredder without him having to attack their hideout.
• Abusive Parents: Averted with Splinter for the most part. He is just as verbally abrasive to his sons as they are to him, and received them in the mail by mistake, but makes it very clear that he loves his sons very much.
• Adaptational Context Change: Due to the series being a parody, scenes and events are rearranged and dubbed over to have completely different meanings than they did in the films they're taken from.
  • In the first two episodes, Splinter and the Turtles are already shown hanging out in April's apartment as they were at the beginning of Secret Of The Ooze. This was well after they defeated Shredder in the first film, but in this series they haven't met or even heard of him yet at this point.
  • In the original film, April went to the police to report on the activity of the Foot Clan, before being ambushed by them in the subway in an attempt to silence her. In Episode 2 of this series, she instead tries to tell the police about the talking turtles and rat that are refusing to leave her house, and the Foot soldiers confront her in the subway to pass on a message from Shredder telling her to keep her legs closed.
  • When the Turtles return to the sewer after dropping off April, the scene in the original film was a devastating moment where they found their home ransacked and Splinter missing. In this version, they are not concerned at all by the mess that was left, and it takes them a moment to realize Splinter is even gone.
    Raphael: (seeing the lair completely trashed) Everything looks the same.
  • After Splinter is captured by the Foot, the scene from the original film is included where Shredder strikes him and puts his blade to his throat. In the original, Shredder was torturing Splinter for information about the Turtles, while here, he's simply trying to shut him up to stop him from singing.
  • The beginning of Episode 4 shows the scene from the first film where Shredder finds a picture that Danny drew of Donatello, allowing him realize that one of his students was betraying him. In this context, Danny is another Foot Soldier who was sent to spy on the Turtles, and Shredder gets angry because this drawing is the only intel he could get on them.
    Shredder: (unfolding the drawing) Okay, so this is a map where I can find the — man, what the fuck? All you did was draw a picture of the Turtles? It's been a whole month, and this is all the information we got?!
  • Episode 4 includes the scene from the beginning of the first film where Splinter lectures the Turtles after their first mission. Here, Splinter is instead scolding his sons for not coming to rescue him when he was captured by the Foot, which didn't occur until well after this scene in the film.
  • In the original film, Raph goes out looking for his missing sai, and encounters Casey Jones by chance when the latter is stopping a mugging. In this version, Raph actively seeks out Casey to buy weed from him, and they get into their fight over that instead.
  • When Raph returns home after his scuffle with Casey, Splinter lights a candle in the pitch black room when lecturing him. While this dark setting was done for atmospheric reasons in the original film, this version implies that the power was cut off because Splinter bought Air Jordans instead of paying the electric bill.
    Raphael: (flicking the switch on and off) The fuck wrong with the light switch, man?!
• Adaptational Heroism: The Shredder. See Even Evil Has Standards and Even Evil Has Loved Ones.
• Adaptational Jerkass: Pretty much every other character besides Shredder, Tatsu, and Tokka and Rahzar. Everyone is far more crass and rude than in the actual franchise.
• Adaptational Species Change: Rahzar is referred to as a mutated Siberian husky/pit-bull, while in the actual Secret Of The Ooze film referred to him as a mutated wolf.
• Adaptational Wimp: Shredder is terrified of Tokka and Rahzar when in Secret of the Ooze he calmly offered to fight them to show them who's boss.
• Adapted Out: Splinter's backstory as the pet of Hamato Yoshi is not mentioned at all, and he has no prior connection to The Shredder.
• Advanced Tech 2000: Shredder's Stick-It-Up-Your-Ass 2000.
• Affably Evil: The Shredder is not a terrible guy as long as you don't have sex with his niece or mutate his pets.
• The Alcoholic: The Turtles and Splinter.
• All Your Base Are Belong to Us: The Foot raid the Turtles' lair and kidnap Splinter, and thoroughly ransack the place.
  Raph: Everything looks the same!
• Ambiguously Gay: Leo is repeatedly called gay, but it so far hasn't been confirmed if he is or not. He has some stereotypical gay traits but has never expressed interest in the same sex.
• Bad Boss: Despite his good traits, Shredder apparently never pays his employees and can be pretty verbally abusive towards them.
• Big Bad: The Shredder.
• Big Eater: Mikey, a trait carried over from the canon franchise. He even suggests putting the TCRI ooze on some pizza to get more of it.
• Boyfriend-Blocking Dad: Well, uncle. The entire conflict of the story is because Shredder is pissed off that Raph slept with April.
• Breakout Character: Splinter is the most popular character and often gets to take the spotlight in announcement videos, and even got to narrate an episode of Itsreal 85's "Crackhead Carl" series.
• Curbstomp Battle: Tokka and Rahzar easily defeat the Turtles and force them to make a hasty retreat.
• Demoted to Extra: So far, Casey Jones' role has been reduced to a brief role as a weed dealer that Raph tangles with.
• Dirty Old Man: Splinter has no shame about trying to have sex with April (and later Perry when he believes he's a woman).
• Disproportionate Retribution: Shredder captures Splinter for an entire month and forces his to eat his own shit to survive, because of his son having sex with April. Later, he's apparently bent on eating the Turtles from the moment he learns Raph slept with April.
• The Don: Splinter has a few traits of this. Best shown when he puts a hit out on Shredder.
• The Dragon: Tatsu to Shredder, as in the films. Doesn't stop Shredder from giving him countless Mexican names.
• Dude Looks Like a Lady: In Episode 10, Splinter mistakes Perry at a distance for a 'fine white bitch' and starts hitting on him.
• Elite Army: Subverted. When Keno tries to join the Foot clan (a.k.a. the fake Bloods), he joins a group of other prospective Bloods who are meeting with a Foot clan representative. The representative tells the group that it won't be easy to join them, and asks them if they can say "Soo-whoop". After everyone mutters the phrase, the representative declares them Bloods.
• Epic Fail: Shredder's first plan to lure out the Turtles with a captured Splinter completely fails because the Turtles completely forget about Splinter and go mooch off of April. On top of that, the Foot goes an entire month without finding any leads on the Turtles.
• Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Shredder legitimately loves his niece April and his pets, and appears to genuinely like his henchman Tatsu.
  • Even Bad Men Love Their Mamas: Shredder also promises to kill Perry if he mutated a poodle he received from his mother.
• Even Evil Has Standards: Shredder is appalled when the Turtles don't look for their kidnapped father. Later, he's enraged when Perry uses his watchdogs to make Rahzar.
• Final Solution: When Shredder challenges the Turtles to another fight.
  Splinter: April, I didn't want it to have to come down to this, okay? …But, fuck it! We gon' kill your little punk-ass uncle!
• Genre Throwback: Is essentially this to Pre- Abridged Series fan-made Gag Dubs such as "The Juggernaut Bitch!"
• Group Hug: Tokka and Rahzar give Shredder a hug like they did in the original. Shredder is notably more terrified about this in this dub.
• Happily Adopted: Raph apparently doesn't learn that he's adopted by Splinter until he's told during the fourth episode, but he still loves his father.
• House Squatting: At the start of the series, the Turtles and Splinter are shown staying in April's apartment, making a complete mess, demanding she bring them food and drinks, and only ever helping around the house when they want something from her. Unlike the film, they are not staying here to hide from Shredder and the Foot Clan (since they haven't even encountered them yet), and it is heavily implied that April herself had no say in the matter, as she is unable to make them leave and even tries to report them to the police, though unsurprisingly, she's dismissed and laughed out of the office.
• Insult Backfire:
  (referring to April)
  Leo: You know what? You're a dog! She deserves better than you!
  Raph: No she don't!
• Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Surprisingly, Splinter and Raph.
  • Splinter may be highly verbally abusive (and occasionally physically as well) to his sons, but he genuinely loves them and is always there for them.
  • Much like his canon counterpart, Raph has a lot of bark, but is actually the most good-hearted of the Turtles way deep down. He saved April from the Foot, is hysterical both when his father is kidnapped and when he tells him that he loves him after he returns, and does try to protect Keno.
• Kick the Dog: Literally, when Perry uses Shredder's pet pit bull and Siberian Husky to make Rahzar.
• Lighter and Softer: Than the original film. It's more on par with the tone of Secret of the Ooze thanks to its' heavy emphasis on comedy, despite being far raunchier than anything in the actual franchise.
• Lock-and-Load Montage: Averted. When Shredder challenges the gang to another fight, Splinter decides that they'll kill him and orders the Turtles to gear up in their gun collection, but Perry convinces them to just drug the Foot instead.
• Mad Scientist: Perry. He creates Rahzar ("Fido-Cheech") out of two of Shredder's dogs. Shredder is notably unhappy about this.
• The Masquerade: Averted, in that the Turtles don't seem to hide their existence, often frequenting the clubs and liquor stores, and having various relationships with women. Still, the police chief thinks April's story about them is a load of bull, and some scenes where the Turtles are trying to evade people are kept intact (which was really the only option).
• Medium Awareness: When itsreal85 moved the show from YouTube to Worldstar, he put up a video where Raph was explaining the move to the audience. Shredder even makes an appearance, angrily demanding to know what happened to the show he was fighting the turtles in. Subverted for Splinter, who seemed confused when the turtles tried to explain it to him.
• Mythology Gag:
  • Shredder is voiced with a deep voice that is quite reminiscent of Kevin Michael Richardson's take from the 2012 series (especially in his very first line).
  • When he bags up the Turtles, he declares, "Looks like we're having turtle soup tonight, boys!"
• N-Word Privileges: The turtles, Splinter, and Shredder notably freely use the term "nigga" and other stereotypically black colloquialisms, but when one of the clearly white Foot ninjas apprehends April, he tells her he has a message for "the N-word turtles".
• Police Are Useless:
  • The Chief of Police is crass and unhelpful when April tries to tell him that the turtles are mooching off of her and won't leave her house.
  • Later, he gets a lot of heat from a group of reporters when Tokka and Rahzar destroy a neighborhood.
  Reporter: Why did you let the neighborhood burn down?? Why didn't you call in the National Guard?!? Let's talk about your sex allegations!
• Promoted to Love Interest: April is in a relationship with Raphael.
• The Quiet One: Tatsu doesn't speak much.
• Red Baron: Raph claims that he's called "Big Blood".
  Mikey: Yeah, but the bitches don't know he's got a little dick!
• Running Gag: Several.
  • Leo being a daddy's boy and the wimpiest member of the team.
  • As punishment for singing with the jailed Splinter, Shredder gives Tatsu a new Mexican name every time he sees him, from Lopez to Ramirez.
  • Donnie trying to prove that his muscles came from hard exercise, not his mutation.
  • Shredder is always making fun of Splinter's awful smell.
  • Keno is referred to as Jackie Chan by the Turtles and Splinter.
• Related in the Adaptation: April is Shredder's niece, which kicks off Shredder's hatred of the turtles when Raphael has sex with her and Splinter attempts to do the same.
• Sophisticated as Hell: When Donnie questions if Perry is telling the truth about their mutation (namely whether he earned his muscles or not), Splinter goes into a monologue that starts out wise but quickly devolves.
  Donnie: What if that motherfucker is lying? What if he's not even a real fucking scientist?
  Splinter: There's a lot of "what if"s in this world, son. Like what if I punched you in your face and knocked your shit into the back of your skull? What if I (Beat) had your girl gobble my nuts? There's a lot of "what if"s but the facts still remain. You are a fucking mutant.
• Speaking Like Totally Teen: Perry starts using slang when talking to the Nigga Turtles in Episode 11, making them wonder if he's high.
• Take That!: The civilians questioning why Shredder is tearing up the neighborhood with Tokka and Rahzar could be a jab at the protestors of Ferguson.
• Token Good Teammate: Splinter is perhaps the most benevolent character of the protagonists. Raph comes close, but his Jerk tendencies tend to outweigh his Heart of Gold.:
• Took a Level in Dumbass: April is reduced to an idiot who doesn't know better than to let the Turtles mooch off of her.
• Trademark Favorite Food: Splinter loves cheese. The Turtles' love of pizza is downplayed.
• Truth in Television: Splinter tells the turtles he "ate [his] own shit to survive." While this is Played for Laughs and for Squick value, it is actually a behavior that several rodents have in real life.
• Ungrateful Bastard: All four of the Turtles. When Splinter is kidnapped, they completely forget about him for a month and go to live with and mooch off of April. Raph even expects Splinter to have paid the electricity bill the same day he's been released from the Foot.
  Shredder: Man, them Turtles ain't looking for his funky ass. Shit, we're gonna have to come up with a new plan, what kind of kids are these man?!?
• What the Hell, Hero?: Splinter rips into his sons for not looking for him.
• Who's on First?: Tatsu informs Shredder that April has slept with Raph, but refers to him as a "red turtle". Shredder responds by placing a hit on a man he believes is calling himself "Red Turtle". Tatsu has to explain it's a talking red turtle to a bewildered Shredder.