Self Demonstrating / General Grievous

NOTE: The following incorporates elements from both the Disney Canon, the current Expanded Universe, and the Legends continuity.

Bask in the glory of a truly honorable warrior. This will be your last time to do so.

(Best read in the voice of Matthew Wood, John DiMaggio, or Richard McGonagle.)

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OOM-19: "Um, General, we've picked up a new transmission."
Grievous: "What did those Republic dogs send this time?"
OOM-19: "It's not Republic, and it's not one of ours either. Apparently, this HoloNet website wants you to write a self-demonstrating page. It's like a thing where you talk about yourself and the things you've done, using these odd categories of data. It's advertised as the #1 way to waste your time!"
Grievous: "WHAT? I can deal with it on my own." *punches OOM-19*

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Hello there.

I am known as Grievous, though I was born Qymaen jai Sheelal.^note Some of abruption Doctrine refer to me as simply space general I am a proud Warrior of the Kaleesh, apprentice of Count Dooku and Supreme Commander of the Separatist Droid Army. I am feared by the Republic's generals for my strength and agility, for Dooku has trained me in their Jedi arts. My lightsaber collection is always growing... although there is one I particularly *cough* have my eyes on.

So many tropes to add to my collection!

• Adaptational Villainy: The legends version of me had a tragic backstory. I was cruelly betrayed by the Republic and the Jedi as I sought to free my people from slavery. Then, I was subjected to painful cybernetic surgery against my will after a shuttle crash. Disney's version of me doesn't have this tragic backstory, and I chose my improvements!
• Adaptational Wimp: Despite the glorious victories I have achieved, Dooku often mocks me for never living up to my peak performance during the Battle of Hypori. It is most a grievance when I am reminded of being unable to kill Skywalker's Padawan (though admittedly, I was simply toying with the little one), and being captured by those Gungans.
• Arch-Enemy: While I will always be the enemy of any Jedi, I have clashed the most specifically with General Kenobi.
• Attack Animal: Ah, my beloved Gor. He was quite a useful guard animal. That is until that Jedi scum Fisto killed him! He will die for such an act! HAHAHAHA *cough*, *cough*, *cough*!
• Ax-Crazy: Crazy? Is it crazy that I desired the destruction of the Jedi filth? It is all I think about. The entire Jedi Order will die by my hand, and I will take their precious lightsabers as trophies!
• Badass Cape: When not in combat, I usually adorn myself with a grey and crimson cloak to store my collection. It is decorated on the back with a symbol of the Kaleesh.
• Badass Normal: There's nothing "normal" about me. But my lack of Force powers is no obstacle to destroying Jedi!
• Bad Boss: I have little patience for those flimsy B1 battle droids, nor for the Separatist leadership for that matter. Dooku also tried to pull this on me by offering me up to Kit Fisto and Nahdar Vebb when he was concerned about my performance. But I proved my worthiness!
• Batman Can Breathe in Space: Hah! Let's see that clown's arch foe survive in the vacuum of space without enhanced cybernetics!
• Berserk Button:
  • KENOBI!
  • Do NOT call me a droid. I am a Cyborg, nothing more! And I chose this form! I was not forced to submit to this against my will!
• Blood Knight: So long as there are Jedi to kill, I will more than happily oblige to lead the charge into battle.
• Bond One-Liner: Gah-Nachkt was one of the more ... annoying aids I was forced to deal with, especially when he dared to ask for more credits for finding Skywalker's R2 unit. Once he found that droid had all of the Republic's secrets within, he demanded a bonus. I gave him one.
• The Brute: Kenobi once dared to accuse me of being this. Let me make myself clear: I am not Dooku's errand boy; I am the leader of the most powerful droid army the galaxy has ever seen!
• The Collector: The lightsaber of a fallen Jedi will always make a fine addition to my collection. I am also no stranger to Kyber Bricks.
• Cyborg: This new form allows for me to easily best the Jedi in combat.
• Expecting Someone Taller: After I kidnapped the Supreme Chancellor, I told Anakin Skywalker that someone with his fame would normally be older than he is. Skywalker then informed me that my height did not live up to his expectations. Jedi scum!
• Freudian Excuse: I only hunt the Jedi because they took the side of the Huk and allowed them to enslave my people. At least, that's how I think this started.
• Hated by All: The Jedi fear me because of my vendetta against them. The Republic sees me as a symbol of Separatist atrocities — they wouldn't pursue peace as long as I was alive. Even the Separatists themselves are usually fearful and suspicious of me. But no matter — none of them can challenge my might.
• The Heavy: Dooku and Sidious have not ventured into as many battles as I have.
• Hero Killer: My ideal galaxy is one cleaned of those Jedi filth. I am well-known for trying to make this dream a reality with my own four hands.
• Insistent Terminology: I may be a Cyborg, but let me make one thing clear: I! Am! NOT! A DROID!
• I Take Offense to That Last One: Eeth Koth once referred to me as a coward and a murderer. It is not murder to rid the galaxy of Jedi filth! *Cough*, *cough*.
• Just You and Me and My GUARDS!: My legion of MagnaGuards is much more elegant in battle than a regular droid could ever hope for. They may perform the dirty work for when I need not.
• Large Ham: I was taught by Dooku to be dramatic in hopes of striking fear into the heart of the Republic.
• Laser Sword: An entire collection, in fact.
• Missed Him by That Much: During most of the Clone Wars, I never encountered Anakin, even though we were involved with the same battles. When I finally met him on Coruscant, I was shocked that he was just a boy!
• Multi-Armed and Dangerous: My cybernetic body has two arms which can split into four. This is always a great advantage to employ against the Jedi! *laughing into coughing*
• Not in This for Your Revolution: I care not for Dooku or the Jedi's politics! All I seek is to wipe the Jedi Order from the face of the galaxy, especially Kenobi!
• The Rival: When we both served Dooku, Asajj Ventress was this to me. We competed for the position of Dooku's second-in-command, and often traded barbs in the line of duty. But Dooku realized she was pathetic and weak and left her to die. I then got the sweet satisfaction of murdering her disgusting Nightsister family, including her mother! Ventress herself got away, but I will find her soon!
• SkeleBot 9000: The cybernetic upgrades I have received make me resemble a Jedi I have put to rest. I am most glad you find it intimidating.
• Unwitting Pawn: I have heard rumors that Sidious only treats me as this in order to further his plans to take over the galaxy, and that he is prepared to sacrifice me when I'm not needed. No matter, as long as I can destroy the Jedi filth.
• Vader Breath: While I have never met this Lord Vader, I gained *cough* an unpleasant coughing problem when upgrading into my cybernetic body. This was only amplified when Master Windu crushed my remaining organs, lungs included.
• Vocal Evolution: When I first appeared, I had a much more...Russian accent, according to your Earthlings. It was toned down for much later, and I have since settled on it.
• White Mask of Doom: The faceplate on my armor is meant to resemble the skulls worn by Kaleesh warriors.
• Would Hit a Girl: *laughs* Yes, a true warrior welcomes all challengers! My mission to the world of Dathomir may have posed difficult had this not been the case. Ventress and her Nightsisters were nothing compared to my power. *laughs* And Skywalker's apprentice was nothing but an insolent brat.
• You Have Failed Me: When my subordinates fail me, I do not hesitate to punish them severely. Dooku once attempted to do this to me by sending Kit Fisto and Nahdar Vebb to my home, but I defeated them handily. I must admit I'm concerned Sidious could still do this to me...But only if I don't kill him first!

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Run, tropers, run. You have only prolonged the inevitable.

Obi-Wan jumps to the ground

Obi-Wan Kenobi: Hello there.

General Grievous: General Kenobi. You are a bold one. (Directs his troops) KILL HIM!

Obi-Wan takes out some of the droids.

Obi-Wan Kenobi: Your move.

General Grievous: You fool! I have been trained in your Jedi arts by Count Dooku. (Activates his arms). Attack, Kenobi!

A few minutes later, Grievous gets shot in the chest multiple times by a blaster, lighting him ablaze before he conks to the ground.

Obi-Wan Kenobi: So uncivilized.