Dorien: Did the doctors say exactly what was causing your irritation?
Sharon: What, you mean apart from you, Dor?
— Dorien Green asking Sharon Theodopolopodous how her trip to the doctors went.
- Date First Aired: 16//11/1991
Sharon's cleaning job has led her to gain an allergy. Returning from the doctors, she finds a letter from Chris informing her that his Uncle Costas has died and left him his café and drinking club. She later comes to visit the cafe and asks Tracey to help her out, but Sharon just lets Tracey do all the work.
Tropes in this Episode:
- Acquired Situational Narcissism: Sharon becomes all high and mighty after taking over the café.
- All Girls Want Bad Boys: Tracey calls out Sharon for only dating bastards, but Dorien backs her up claiming dependable men are boring.
- Ass Shove: Sharon threatens to shove Chris' cigar where Ronnie has piles.
- Bad Boss: After taking over the café, Sharon overworks Tracey and looks down on all others.Sharon: We musta made more than that. He's had at least free coffees.Tracey: Well I let 'im 'ave the last one for nuffink. I felt sorry for 'im, 'e was cold.Sharon: Good! Turn the 'eatin' off, keep him cold! The colder he is, the more coffees he'll drink.
- Bestiality Is Depraved: Sharon lies that Chris was arrested for having sex with farm animals.
- Book Dumb: Tracey has trouble counting hours.Tracey: I have been slavin' in there since eight o'clock this mornin'. That makes... a bloody long stretch!
- Brick Joke: When Sharon visits Chris, she tells him that people might start calling him Old MacDonald after she lied that he had sex with farm animals. Later in the episode, Andy tells her to tell Old MacDonald that he said hello.
- Brutal Honesty: Sharon asks Chris if he only wants her to run the café because he needs some idiot to keep things together. His responce? A chirpy "yeah".
- Deadpan Snarker:
- Sharon after seeing Chris has written her a letter.Sharon: Ohh, unusual for him to put crayon to paper.
- After seeing the state of the café, Dorien asks if it has toilets or if she'll have to look for a bucket.
- Sharon after seeing Chris has written her a letter.
- The Dreaded Toilet Duty:
- Chris is disgusted at the though of having a wife who cleans bogs.
- Tracey complains about having to clean the gents' toilet at midnight.
- Drunk Driver: Tracey refuses to drink to avoid becoming one.
- Drunk with Power: Sharon after gaining the café and starting to boss around Tracey.
- Embarrassing Nickname: Sharon's lies earn Chris "Old MacDonald".
- Footsie Under the Table: Sharon only asks Chris to scratch her leg, but he tries to go further.
- Gretzky Has the Ball: Tracey claims she doesn't know the difference between a tennis bat and a cricket racquet.
- Hilarious Outtakes: The first time trying to film Dorien entering the kitchen in her skimpy blue dress, Linda Robson (Tracey) immediately cracked up laughing.
- Idle Rich: It's briefly mentioned that Dorien's idea of work is licking a post stamp, suggesting that she's this. She does try to avert this during the episode though.
- It's All About Me: Tracey calls Dorien out for this in the first scene.Dorien: I look after number one, life isn't a charity.
- Jar Potty: Dorien makes a sarcastic comment about one after seeing the state of the café.Dorien: Does it have a ladies' room or do I look for a bucket marked "Hers"?
- Jerkass: The café customers who perv on Tracey and start fights with the neighbours.
- Lady Drunk: Sharon mixes her antihistamines with Greek brandy and gets wasted to the point of tears.
- Lazy Bum: Dorien gets a job delivering sandwiches and gives up almost instantly.
- Meaningful Echo: At the start of the episode Dorien selfishly mentions life isn't a charity. Sharon says the same thing in the climax and Tracey calls her out on how running the café's gone to her head.
- Noodle Incident:
- Chris' relatives all poked Sharon with pins during her wedding and pretended it was an accident.
- The last thing that Chris gave to Sharon apparently took six months and some penicillin to get rid of.
- Sharon once ate ten Mars Bars in fifteen minutes.
- Chris scored three own goals when subbed onto a football cup game.
- The Oldest Profession:
- After seeing Dorien's skimpy dress, Tracey remarks she's supposed to be selling sandwiches, not herself.
- Sharon tries to get Tracey to calm down by telling her she was only done for drunk and disorderly, not soliciting.
- One-Shot Character: Andy.
- One-Word Title: The title of the episode is "Business".
- Pink Elephants: An absolutely sloshed Sharon refuses to get in the car, claiming it's full of lobsters.
- Plot Allergy: Sharon gains an allergy as a result of her cleaning job.
- Plot-Triggering Death: The main plot of the episode starts when Chris' uncle dies, which gives them a café.
- Scatterbrained Senior: Tracey and Sharon's cousin's great-granddad thought he was a flamingo.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: Tracey leaves the café at three in the morning once she realises there's no sign of closing any time soon.
- Sentimental Drunk: Greek brandy mixed with pills makes Sharon cry and tell Tracey she loves her.
- Shipper on Deck: Costas leaves Chris his café, hoping it would get him and Sharon back together.
- Shout-Out:
- Chris gains the nickname Old MacDonald after Sharon tells people he was arrested for sleeping with farm animals.
- Sharon makes a reference to the Trojan Horse.
- Sharon calls a sleepy customer "Rip Van Winkle".
- Tracey briefly calls Sharon "Lady Di".
- Sharon mentions she'll be so sober she'll make Mother Theresa look like Edna the Inebriate Woman.
- Spiteful Spit: Sharon mentions the other inmates spit in Chris' tea.
- Story Arc: This episode begins the plotline of the girls inheriting and running a café, which will play a major role in the next few series.
- Take That!:
- Dorien hoped any recession would remain north of Watford.
- Dorien disdainfully mentions that cheese and chutney sandwiches are for people who take British Rail.
- Dorien mentions Hester Gordon must have arms like Fatima Whitbread.
- Title Drop: By Sharon when trying to justify her behaviour.Sharon: Look, this is business Trace, you've gotta remember that.
- Token Good Teammate: Chris' uncle Costas was the only one of Chris' relatives who didn't hate Sharon.
- Unusual Euphemism: Tracey calls Dorien's boobs "thrupp'nnies".
- Vomit Discretion Shot: Sharon vomits in a police constable's helmet.
- What the Hell, Hero?: Tracey calls out Sharon for becoming selfish and demanding after taking over the café.
- You Need to Get Laid: Sharon's response to seeing Tracey getting the meat to stick on the kebab machine (which looks remarkably suggestive) is to comment that she's gone too long without a man.
