Quotes / Video Game Cruelty Potential

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    Live-Action TV 

Brian: What are you playing?
Tim: Tomb Raider 3.
Brian: She's drowning.
Tim: Yeah.
Brian: Is that the point of the game?
Tim: It depends what mood you're in, really.
Brian: What sort of mood are you in, then?
Tim: Well, I got a letter from my girlfriend this morning three months too late explaining why she dumped me. It was full of "You'll always be special" and "I'll always love you" platitudes designed to make me feel better while simultaneously appeasing her deep-seated sense of guilt for running off with a slimy little city boy named Duane and destroying my faith in everything in the world that is good and pure.
Brian: So it didn't really work, then.
Tim: No, it made me want to drown things!


"You can show your neighbors you love them
Or just beat the dogshit out of them"

    Video Games 

As a Pyro, you can often set enemies on fire and retreat, leaving them to die from the burning.
Team Fortress 2 Player Tip

Ouch! Mario, you did that on purpose, didn't you?! THAT'S! JUST! MEAN!
Kooper, Paper Mario 64

Make poor Luigi lose a life...
NES Remix, Mario Bros. stage objective

"I thought I was a moral person. I was wrong."

That was uncalled for! But a lot of fun to watch!
The announcer, NFL Blitz

You're a disgrace to your mother!
Ninten if bullhorn is used on Giegue, EarthBound Beginnings

    Web Animation 

Switch up your protagonist as much as you like, they're still controlled by a player; an entity as ethically restrained as Joseph Stalin playing with his bath toys.
Zero Punctuation on [PROTOTYPE 2]'s attempts to give a tragic backstory to a controllable monster.

Saints Row 2 ... is fully aware that most gamers are dickheads, and if you give them any kind of freedom their first instinct will be to abuse it. If you give them guns, they will shoot old ladies. If you give them cars, they will run over old ladies. If you give them aircraft, they will ascend to the highest possible height and hurl themselves out onto an old lady. And if you give them customisable outfits their first instinct will be to take off all their clothes and run around the streets hip-thrusting in the faces of old ladies. If you try to stop them doing all this, they'll hate you for it. Not only does Saints Row 2 not stop you, but it keeps score! Every single one of my examples has a little mini-game attached.


Ken: Everyone seems to agree Grand Theft Auto V is pretty damn awesome, though there are some questions about general misogyny and depictions of torture.
Arnold: Those are some pretty high-minded concerns for a guy who's currently driving a taco truck in circles in a stadium parking lot, purposefully running over pedestrians.
Ken: Because that's my decision, not the game's.

I don't know why you'd include a riot gun and a zebra in the same game if you don't expect me to interact with both of them at the same time.

    Web Original 

Play a Sim game for a couple of years and you'll really reconsider the concept of a kind and loving god.

Itís not just that he appears to be the direct visual model for at least one prominent right-wing blowhard...Rather, itís that the vicious sadist who traps people in homicidal amusement games is literally named Arcade. The name, dating as it does to the late 70s, is not directly tied to video games, but rather the larger tradition of the penny arcade.

And yet there is something damningly on point in the link between sadistic depravity and playing games...at the end of the day, when it comes to Arcade, youíve got to admit: heís the very image of a gamer.

God, look at me. This was supposed to be my quest for peace, and I've becomes addicted to destroying suns.

I got scared when I tied a pleading woman to the train tracks, watched her turn into a cloud of chilli and then realized that was a secret achievement. It felt like the game was saying, 'Ha! I knew there was as much wrong with you as there is with me!'

You can even simulate 9/11 if you want, which a disturbingly large number of people have done. Everyone grieves in their own way.

The game loaded levels with civilian scientists, told us not to shoot them, then gave the scientists guns and grenades because it knew exactly how much was wrong with us. It was like telling someone not to think of a pink elephant after giving them a pink elephant gun. It was a psychology test the entire generation failed.

You are in a verdant forest. All around you are the sounds of small animals rustling in the bushes, creating an orchestra of ambient, peaceful sounds. The gentle morning sun turns the dew into a soft steam rising from the blades of grass. A young doe eyes you warily in the distance but, sensing your kindness, slowly approaches. All is as it should be.
>kill deer
>murder the shit out of deer
You slaughter the deer in the most horrible fashion you can think of, for absolutely no reason. The gentle silence is broken by painful screams and the misty grass is tinged red with blood. You are soaked in its entrails.
Wow. There is something really wrong with you.

The most useful part of sneaking is undoubtedly the 'stealth throw'. While firing a missile weapon or attacking in melee will get you noticed immediately, throwing things at people will not. Stock up on dead enemies' weapons, clothing and severed body parts and you can pretend you're some gruesome comedy version of Sam Fisher. You know you want to.
— The Dwarf Fortress wiki, on Adventure Mode.

Dwarf Fortress: where the Geneva Convention screams out in pain.
Bay 12 forums poster Oliolli

"The reason anyone goes for master rank Dark Magic in Might and Magic 6 or 7? One word: Armageddon. Hell, that's the only reason I use dark magic in those games anymore."

These types of items can be used to destroy objects or even other summoned items (e.g., a club can be used to hit an animal; steak can be attached to a baby to attract lions; rockets can be lobbed at a man).

Think about it! How many times have we enslaved and killed our own people just because we couldn't wait few more turns for something to finish building on it's own? How many times do we declare war, kill, conquer and vassalize(lol) in the name of some arbitrary victory ? How often do we run a communist economy !!!!!

Montezuma and Shaka are angels compared to us!

I got a feeling civ games sometimes bring out the worst in us.
Shirastro of Civilization Fanatics

"During winter, it pleads with you not to cut off its fur with big, watery eyes. You do it anyway... because that's how you roll. You Monster!."
— In-game description of Woolies in Rune Factory 4

    Web Video 

"It's more fun to break the windows anyway, so fuck it. 'EXTRA! EXTRA! Paperboy goes MAD! Here's some ASS-ifieds! Here you go, Daily Douchebag! 10% off your next purchase of FUCK YOU! Cloudy with a chance of ASS-KICKING! Dear Abby: Make 'em eat shit! Crosswords: can you spell C-U-N-T? Horoscopes: You will achieve greatness — in HELL!!!"

Darla: Ashamed you got beat up by a girl? I'm just gonna back run home to daddy!
Dunkey: Oh really? *fires bazooka at her knee* How're gonna do dat?
Dunkey, "How to Play 'Fallout 4''

Invade peoples' privacy 10 times and you get a new car!
George Weidman on Watch_Dogs

Jack: Don't do it man! He's your buddy! He takes you places! He goes — he goes, "Hey, Friend! Why're standin' way over there, Friend? That seems really weird, hm. Imma just gonna eat some hay and think about my wife and *horse gets hit by falling box* -GOH!"
Rich: *maniacal laughter*
Jack: You horrible dickhead.

Being a merchant was surprisingly fun and exciting — especially when you found out that you could land on pirate starbases and become an illegal drug dealer. Hell, you could traffic in human slavery if you wanted. You could even tractor beam in ejected pilots that you shot down into your cargo hold and then later sell them as human slaves! JESUS! Talk about adding insult to injury. It's that kind of freedom, that little personal touch of pointless cruelty that makes you feel like a real, authentic space bastard.

Did I do something nice? That's not what you're supposed to do in video games! Quick, how do I bring the car in here to run you over?

You're an Aspirant, are you? That is oh so very close to a certain drug you would take for a pain of the head. Allow me to remedy that situation where you don't have one already. *Proceeds to bludgeon him with a chain-covered bat*

Dupre: Well, twenty seconds in this place and I already hate it.
Steve the Avatar: You guys just have to have the right perspective on this. We're in a new world! A new place! A world where nobody knows us. A world whose problems we aren't indirectly responsible for. A world not full of the vengeful ghosts of our dead relatives and lovers. A world we probably won't destroy. Do you understand what this means?
Iolo: You'll finally stop—
Steve: Nobody's gonna see it coming.