"You can show your neighbors you love them
Or just beat the dogshit out of them"
Brian: What are you playing?
Tim: Tomb Raider 3.
Brian: She's drowning.
Brian: Is that the point of the game?
Tim: It depends what mood you're in really.
Brian: What sort of mood are you in then?
Tim: Well, I got a letter from my girlfriend this morning three months too late explaining why she dumped me. It was full of "You'll always be special" and "I'll always love you" platitudes designed to make me feel better while simultaneously appeasing her deep-seated sense of guilt for running off with a slimy little city boy named Duane and destroying my faith in everything in the world that is good and pure.
Brian: So it didn't really work then.
Tim: No, it made me want to drown things!
Ken: Everyone seems to agree Grand Theft Auto V is pretty damn awesome, though there are some questions about general misogyny and depictions of torture.
Arnold: Those are some pretty high-minded concerns for a guy who's currently driving a taco truck in circles in a stadium parking lot, purposefully running over pedestrians.
Ken: Because that's my decision, not the game's.
— Team Fortress 2 Player Tip
"Switch up your protagonist as much as you like, they're still controlled by a player; an entity as ethically restrained as Joseph Stalin playing with his bath toys."
"I got scared when I tied a pleading woman to the train tracks, watched her turn into a cloud of chili and then realized that was a secret achievement. It felt like the game was saying, 'Ha! I knew there was as much wrong with you as there is with me!'"
"GoldenEye didn't just spawn the modern shooter, it pre-empted holodecks by giving lonely dicks something to do with their time. The game loaded levels with civilian scientists, told us not to shoot them, then gave the scientists guns and grenades because it knew exactly how much was wrong with us. It was like telling someone not to think of a pink elephant after giving them a pink elephant gun. It was a psychology test the entire generation failed. It's why every modern game is now a dirt brown gun in a ruined world."
You are in a verdant forest. All around you are the sounds of small animals rustling in the bushes, creating an orchestra of ambient, peaceful sounds. The gentle morning sun turns the dew into a soft steam rising from the blades of grass. A young doe eyes you warily in the distance but, sensing your kindness, slowly approaches. All is as it should be.
>murder the shit out of deer
You slaughter the deer in the most horrible fashion you can think of, for absolutely no reason. The gentle silence is broken by painful screams and the misty grass is tinged red with blood. You are soaked in its entrails.
Wow. There is something really wrong with you.
"The most useful part of sneaking is undoubtedly the 'stealth throw'. While firing a missile weapon or attacking in melee will get you noticed immediately, throwing things at people will not. Stock up on dead enemies' weapons, clothing and severed body parts and you can pretend you're some gruesome comedy version of Sam Fisher. You know you want to."
"I know I'm supposed to be all 'the one', but I have too much fun killing everyone."
"The reason anyone goes for master rank Dark Magic in Might and Magic 6 or 7? One word: Armageddon. Hell, that's the only reason I use dark magic in those games anymore."
These types of items can be used to destroy objects or even other summoned items (e.g., a club can be used to hit an animal; steak can be attached to a baby to attract lions; rockets can be lobbed at a man)
Think about it! How many times have we enslaved and killed our own people just because we couldn't wait few more turns for something to finish building on it's own? How many times do we declare war, kill, conquer and vassalize(lol) in the name of some arbitrary victory ? How often do we run a communist economy !!!!!
Montezuma and Shaka are angels compared to us!
I got a feeling civ games sometimes bring out the worst in us.
— Shirastro of Civilization Fanatics
"During winter, it pleads you not to cut off its fur with big, watery eyes. You do it anyway... because that's how you roll. You Monster!."
— in-game description of Woolies in Rune Factory 4
Dupre: Well, twenty seconds in this place and I already hate it.
Steve the Avatar: You guys just have to have the right perspective on this. We're in a new world! A new place! A world where nobody knows us. A world whose problems we aren't indirectly responsible for. A world not full of the vengeful ghosts of our dead relatives and lovers. A world we probably won't destroy. Do you understand what this means?
Iolo: You'll finally stop—
"Did I do something nice? That's not what you're supposed to do in video games! Quick, how do I bring the car in here to run you over?"
— Marik, Marik Plays Bloodlines