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Quotes: Took the Bad Film Seriously
"You have not lived until you've seen Martin Landau disco. Well, perhaps you have. He is both miscast and misdirected, and seems to labor under the misapprehension that his role should be taken seriously."
Roger Ebert on B.A.P.S. (1997)

"(John) Candy, for the few precious scenes in which he legitimately appears (and isn't being dopplegangered by computers or a stunt double), is depressingly good, like a rare form of terminal cancer that gives you the power of flight and makes everything taste like cake. He is able to rise above material that, at its best, is the antithesis of laughter, and somehow manages to be completely watchable and occasionally funny in a movie that is the comedic equivalent of stabbing a weeping hobo to death in an abandoned boxcar."

Det. Magnotta (Christopher Walken): ...You don't have a clue, do you? You're not smart enough to be a suspect. This guy...is a genius. It took him years to perfect it. Now he's gonna savor it. It's not just the killing he's into; he's into power. The intimacy of goin' inside, where the heart still pumps; he's into feelin' the skin tighten like a canvas and the warm blood spraying, leaving masterpieces for us to marvel at. And he's gonna go on and on, creating masterpieces, unless I stop him. Because I know what drives him to it. So don't you dare think you understand a killer—or me.
Spoony: (applauding) Ohh, you gotta give it up for Walken, c'mon! Give it up! Chistopher Walken, everyone!

"Iíll give it to the actress Piper Perabo, she was acting the shit out of this movie. And for a movie like The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle, she didnít have to give much effort. Of all the real actors playing the cartoon characters, the only one I felt did a decent job was Rene Russo as Natasha. I say that and she is the only actor to get a Razzie nom... DeNiro is just kind of in this movie and doesnít contribute much besides embarrassment."
Miles Antwiler on Rocky and Bullwinkle (2000)

"Don't try to class this movie up, lady. It's not worth it."
The Nostalgia Critic on Kate Winslet in A Kid in King Arthur's Court

"And then there's Shaun Toub, who stands out for the opposite reason: He's an honest-to-shit actual actor, and he looks as out of place as a zebra that's wandered into an alpaca farm. You can actually watch the realization dawn over Toub's face that nobody else is doing any acting in this film, but he soldiers on, dedicated to his craft in spite of everything. Toub, who's playing the uncle of Dev Patel's tormented Prince Zuko, is the real tragic hero of this movie, as you watch him struggle to cling to his dignity as everyone around him drowns in narrative sewage."
Charlie Jane Anders, in the io9.com review of The Last Airbender

"Once we meet a bad guy whoís exactly how Nolanís Batman films would portray the Riddler, we glance down to find our cinema seats have morphed into coconut mats, whizzing on a rapid, spiraling descent into spectacular dumbness. Itís all so gloriously and unexpectedly stupid, like Zodiac penned by someone who fended off middle-act writerís block by hoovering a load of PCP into their lungs. The only way to watch is to revel in the bizarre combination of massive craziness and powerhouse acting, from two leads who were quite clearly cast by accident, instead of the materialís rightful players, Nic Cage and a sweaty John Cusack."

Chris: The destruction of the bar is almost impossible to care about because it was pretty janky to begin with, but the bright shining moment is Udo Kier, pawing at a chainlink fence and selling it like heís watching someone murder a child while this squealing In The Heat of the Night guitar riff plays underneath him.
Matt: Itís like heís making up for Pamela Andersonís non-acting with DOUBLE ACTING.
Chris: Heíd have to ratchet things up to quintuple acting if he wanted to balance her out.
Matt: Not even the Kier can shoulder that load.
Chris Sims and Matt Wilson on Barb Wire

"And in a twist of fate that I can only call miraculous, Matt Leblanc is not that bad of an actor. I used to think he was Godawful in this film. Really, when I first saw it I thought he was the worst thing in the movie. But as I've aged I've began to notice subtle nuances in filmmaking. And looking at it again with fresh eyes some 12 years later, I have come to the conclusion that it's not him — it's the script. Watch this guy and tell me he's not trying. He's trying hard. But the script makes him out to be a total horny asshat who can only spout one-liners. I mean, he hits on his boss's daughter RIGHT IN FUCKING FRONT OF HIM!!!"

"Kirk asks how theyíll get past the Great Barrier, and Sybok says that God gave him a vision, and is waiting for them on the other side. This merely convinces Kirk that Sybok is 'mad'...Laurence Luckinbill actually plays this really well: Doubt crosses his face, and while looking at Kirk he asks himself, almost genuinely, 'Am I?' Then, not with confidence but with visible faith, he answers himself with a smile: 'Weíll see.' Not a lot of actors would have played it that way, so well done."

"Q wants to have a baby with Janeway. Whose idea was that? ...(Kate) Mulgrew is trying so hard to give this material some meaning but sheís fighting a losing battle Ė watching her try so hard is like watching the crew trying to save the Titanic."
Doc Oho on Star Trek: Voyager, "The Q And the Grey"

"(Peter) Davison tries his best with the material, which is part of the problem. A Fifth Doctor who seems to be so constantly on the back-foot in a story as banal and generic as The Kingís Demons is going to seem weak and easily over-whelmed when he faces a more credible or severe threat...his attempts to wrangle drama from the set-up only serve to make the story more frustrating. This should be a walk in the park. Itís easy to imagine Tom Baker or Patrick Troughton having great fun. Instead, the Doctor seems quite clearly on edge."

"While on television, we go from the supposed best Doctor Who story ever to the supposed worst. Unlike The Caves of Androzani, The Twin Dilemma made it as the worst story for two polls running. On basic quality, this might not be quite fair...Itís not Nicola Bryantís fault — she plays the material as well as it can be played. Nor is it (Colin) Bakerís fault. They try to make the scenes watchable, but nobody could possibly make this work... Thatís how you kill Doctor Who in under a hundred minutes. You make it about a battered woman idolizing her abuser.

Yeah, OK. I take it back. This is the worst fucking story ever."
Phil Sandifer on Doctor Who, "The Twin Dilemma"

"Y'know, you don't have to try so hard. You could just half-ass this performance and get paid the same. Just sayin'."
Obscurus Lupa on a bit part actor from Baywatch

"Thereís also a really, really nice line delivery from (John) Glover right before this where Tess asks him if Lex is worth killing over, and he tells her 'Lex is worth anything,' as though heís trying to tell her why people drink water or breathe air. Itís a really amazing piece of acting, especially from a guy who just had to spout off a paragraph of exposition so sloppy that it actually started with the words 'As you know, Tess.'"
ComicsAlliance on Smallville ("Finale")

Q: Is there anything good about the Wonder Woman pilot?
A: Adrianne Palicki. People might not have liked the way WW was portrayed, but Palicki did the best job she could with it. She was tough, funny, charming, and appropriately badass, all when she needed to be. As a successor to Lynda Carter's Wonder Woman, I'd say she filled the corset admirably.
Q: That's it?
A: Oh! And they made Wonder Woman look tall.
Topless Robot, "Rob's Wonder Woman Woman TV Pilot FAQ!"

"[Al Pacino] is actually trying here, even with the awful material, injecting a lot of misplaced intensity into something that he just could've ho-hahed his way through in his sleep."
Film Brain on Pacino's performance in Jack and Jill

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