Calling Your Orgasms
Elliot: J.D., I knew you were faking it because at the end you didn't say "bombs away."Calling Your Orgasms is the tendency of any character in a sex scene to announce the moment at which they orgasm. This announcement, while usually addressed to the person's partner, may also sometimes be addressed to Jesus, God, the deity of one's choice, or that other person they desperately wish was there instead. This is frequently done in works in lieu of actually showing the sex act itself as the sounds alone are less explicit than the visuals. But it's also ubiquitous in pornography. Frequently this trope is parodied or Played For Comedy especially in the less graphic versions of it. May or may not invoke a sexual version of Say My Name. See also Calling Your Attacks, The Immodest Orgasm, The Grunting Orgasm and IKEA Erotica. For many people this can be Truth in Television (perhaps as a result of its frequent use in media) but, as with all sexual tropes, it does not apply to everyone.
J.D.: How could I forget my sexiest move?
J.D.: How could I forget my sexiest move?
— Scrubs, "Her Story II"
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- A condom commercial has a kid ask permission for crazy actions, just a few seconds before the mother starts shouting "Yes, Yes, YES!".
- Played for big laughs in the superhero parody The Pro, when the title character blows the Superman Captain Ersatz character. He frantically warns her to move her head just as he's about to come, and his super-powered sperm blows a hole through the room, shoots high up in the air, and clips a wing off of a passing airplane.
- Done in a lot of gags in Red Ears.
- IFIX TCEN TCEN! (Also "Ifis Cen Cen". From the photonovela "Supersex". Almost a meme in Italia. Hey, even a beer was named after that.)
- In one notable issue of Love and Rockets, a male character having sex with a woman invokes the name of "SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA!" at the applicable moment. Don't try this at home.
- A Pleasant Surprise features this. Played for d'aaawwwwww.
- My Immortal: "I was beginning to get an orgasim." This trope also happens unintentionally sometimes, e.g. "Draco and I came."
- Used also in Relax. It fits really nicely, given the emphasis on eroticism and intimacy versus being outright pornographic.
- This priceless line from Quote's Bad Hair Day: Rated R for Retelling of Cave Story:
- American Pie: During an oral sex session, Vicky and Kevin both fail to hear her father calling her down for dinner. The father is about to come upstairs but fortunately she orgasms at just the right point to shout "I'm coming". So he thinks she's heard him and goes back to sit down. The reason behind this particular example is the girl had never had an orgasm before, so her exclamation was more surprise than anything.
- Parodied in When Harry Met Sally: the movie's most famous scene involves Sally faking an orgasm in the middle of a restaurant to prove a point.
- In the original cut of Hancock, the title character gives a fair warning even before the act, then invokes this trope during the act for a very good reason. His partner doesn't really listen and ends up hitting her head in the wall at the opposite end of the room. Considering the three holes that were blown in the roof a second later, she got lucky. This is a nod to Larry Niven's deconstruction, Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex, (here.)
- Variation in The Rocky Horror Picture Show, after Riff Raff lets Frank know that Rocky has run off:
Audience: *in the same cadence* So's Brad!
- Played for laughs in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, with one of the women Peter sleeps with:
Woman: [Dead monotone] Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. I just came. Oh. Oh. Oh.
- In I Love You Phillip Morris, Jim Carrey's character helpfully announces that he's "gonna come" to the guy he's screwing.
- In Middle Age Crazy, Bruce Dern's wife yells out "Bingo!" each time she comes while they're having sex.
- There are a number of jokes based off of little kids mishearing this trope:
"The legs go to Heaven first. 'Cause last night, I peeked in my parent's bedroom and my momma had her legs up in the air and she was shouting 'Lord, I'm coming! I'm coming!'""Mommy, why can't I say short prayers like Daddy and his friend do?"
- In American Psycho, Patrick orders the women he has sex with to "let me know when they had orgasms and to be very vocal about it".
- In Educating Sarah, one of the male characters does this in an encounter with the main character, Sarah, despite her probably having a good idea he was getting ready anyway.
Live Action TV
- The BBC3 series Horne & Corden had an Overly Long Gag sketch around this.
- There's an episode of Sex and the City where Miranda's Guy of the Week asks her to talk dirty for him, and she explains to her girlfriends that the only talk she can do in bed is an 'orgasm alert' - "I'm gonna come, I'm gonna come - because, well, I'm gonna come. Anything else feels like play-acting."
- During the Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode "Once More with Feeling", Tara singing to Willow while they're in her bedroom and lying down and — oh, where'd Willow go out of shot? — "You make me complete... you make me com-plete... you make me— " Cue a Smash Cut to Xander guessing what they might be up to.
Spike: You want me, Slayer? Come and get me!Buffy: Oh I'm coming. I'm coming right NOW! (cut to Spike getting his 'sweet release')
- On The Tudors, when Henry VIII finally engages in coitus with Anne Boleyn, he announces his climax. Which may be justified, since they both know full well the consequences of her getting pregnant before he's legally married to her.
- Played for laughs in an episode of The IT Crowd with Richmond's weird girl in the server room: "Oh, look at me, having an orgasm!"
- In My Name Is Earl Joy claims Earl shouts "It's happening!" every time he's climaxing.
- Happens in the episode "Her Story II" from Scrubs. Along with the above quote, J.D. and Turk also have gongs that they ring whenever they successfully have sex.
- Happens several times in Eminem's "FACK".
Stand Up Comedy
- In one of Pablo Francisco's routines involving Don LaFontaine (the Movie Previews Guy), he speculates what it must be like for Mrs. LaFontaine to have sex with the man, in a gag that culminates with the iconic booming voice calling out "Coming soon". He does the same thing with Droopy Dog and video gamers, among others.
- Russell Peters does the same thing with British people, culminating with "Oh my God, I'm arriving!"
- Richard Jeni has a bit that referenced this trope. In the bit, God gets sick of sitting through a boring Mass and goes outside to get His messages from His secretary. Those messages include things like about a million people saying they really need to roll a seven, about seven million people calling from bathroom floors saying that if he makes it stop they'll never drink again, etc. At the end the secretary asks God "Oh, and are you having a party? Because about a billion people called up and said 'Yes God, I'm coming!'" The bit ends with God concluding that He needs to change His phone number.
- In The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, near the end of the opening song "20 Fans", a customer is heard to exclaim, "I'm coming! I'm coming! Thank you! Thank you, Jesus!"
- A horrendously squicky example from Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street. Judge Turpin, in "Mea Culpa", whips himself to the point of orgasm while fantasising about his teenaged ward, Johanna, and shouts "God!"
- "Help me, Premature Ejaculation Man!"◊
- Characters in Ménage à 3 are rarely quiet during sex — it's that sort of Sex Comedy — and occasionally get specific, notably here.
- In Something*Positive, Aubrey once yelled out "Pikachu! I choose you!" during orgasm. Apparently, it was a dare.
- Played with in Times Like This: As Cassie climaxes in a "virtual sex" session with Philip, she lets loose with a flurry of random letter typings.
- In The Nostalgia Chick's Halloween Episode reviewing The Worst Witch movie, The Nostalgia Critic guest stars to sing about Sexy Whatever Outfits. It's a parody of Tim Curry's ridiculously hammy song in the movie, and the ending:
"I JUUUUUST CAAAAAAAAAAME! But I'm wearing white, so it's okay."
- Dragon Ball Z Abridged:
"Gallick... gun... FIIIIRRREEEEEE!!!" [A Gallick Gun is shot through the window.]
- Not only does Vegeta call out his orgasm, he fires it.
Future Gohan: MASENKO... HAA!!! *laser beam pierces the roof*
- Cut lines from History of Trunks Abridged reveals it's probably a Saiyan trait.
- Family Guy:
- Apparantly par for the course for Peter:
Lois: "Peter wait, PETE-"
Lois: "Oh... good for you."
- In British porn:
Man:"Almost... Almost... Almost... There we are."Woman: "Well done."
- Jackie Gleason: "POW! Right in the kisser!"
- And again with Cleveland:
Cleveland: "And boom goes the dynamite."
- Apparantly par for the course for Peter:
- The Oblongs has Pickles with a slow crescendo of "Oh God" before culminating in "Jiminy Cricket!"