SHE CURSES! SHE SMOKES! SHE BLOWS!note
An adult, satirical prestige format one-shot comic, written by Garth Ennis
, with pencils and lettering by Amanda Conner and inks by Jimmy Palmiotti.
A bored young prostitute (and single mom) is given galactic superpowers by a Great Gazoo
. She's immediately noticed by the local Expy
superheroes, but doesn't feel like going along with their self-aggrandizing hero bullshit. Instead, she exacts revenge on a Jerk Ass
customer, and she teaches the local Superman equivalent about sex. Unfortunately, his semen is also superpowered and knocks a plane out of the sky, and while he manages to save the passengers, he's forced to do so pantsless. The ensuing scandal damages the entire league's reputation irrevocably.
She's about to be kicked out, but the meeting is interrupted by a terrorist attack, and the Pro is forced to make a life-or-death decision.
- The Adjectival Man: Parodied with the villain team The Grammatical Team of Grimness, which consists of villains such as The Noun, The Verb or The Adjective. Evidently all other names of this type have been taken.
- Animated Adaptation: There was one that was created by Titmouse.
- Author Tract: As usual, this comic is just another long-winded ramble from Garth Ennis about why he doesn't like superheroes.
- Broken Aesop: In the foreword for the book, Garth Ennis says the point of the book was to point out how super heroes aren't needed. Except the titular character was only able to save the day by flying a bomb into space. Also, the pro says the heroes are never in any real danger, only for the Green lantern expy to be killed a few pages later.
- Captain Ersatz: The League of Honor are all obvious parodies of the Justice League. There's also The Viewer, the alien that granted The Pro her powers and a parody of The Watcher of Marvel comics. The Pro herself is basically Power Girl if she was a surly hooker.
- Cleavage Window: The Pro's costume comes with one. Unsurprising considering who she's a parody of.
- Combat Pragmatist: the protagonist, much to the horror of other heroes, considering what her level of strength can do to people.
- Flying Brick: The protagonist, as well as Superman parody The Saint.
- Informed Flaw: We are told the heroes are all useless but they are repeatedly shown saving people from real dangers.
- Informed Wrongness: The heroes are attacked for not stopping 9/11 and for not being willing to destroy whole schools to take out one bad guy. But they point out they were busy with another crisis and the pro does not counteract the Wonder Woman expy pointing out as vigilantes they have no right to decide to take a life.
- No Name Given: The main character's name is never given.
- Punch Clock Hero: The Pro only agreed to become a superhero after she's told that she'll be paid.
- Single Mom Stripper: Well, a hooker, but the same thing. She also has a day job as a waitress.
- Student Teacher Romance: The Pro was knocked up by her guidance councilor at the age of 17 and kicked out of her house by her parents shortly afterwards.
- Touched by Vorlons: The Pro was given superpowers by the voyeuristic alien The Viewer.
- Ungrateful Bitch: The prostitute goes on a 3-4 page rant about why superheroes suck, despite the fact that if it wasn't for the Superman-expy, her son would be dead.