Funny / One Piece: Grand Line 3.5

• Their very first play-through of One Piece:
  GM: A pirate ship! Enemy Attack! Enemy Attack!
  Sailor 1: I roll for initiative! 16!
  GM: They haven't boarded the ship yet!
  Sailor 2: I use my grappling hook!
  GM: Why-No! Just go look for the Captain.
  Sailor 1: Good Idea. We can kill the Captain and take the ship.
  GM: I meant your Captain.
  Sailor 1: That's who I meant.
• When Natalie first appears in the story:
  Nat: I poke my head out the door and look around. Do I see anything?
  GM: You see nothing.
  Nat: I step outside.
  GM: As soon as you step outside, you notice Alvida's ship pulling alongside the ship.
  Nat: This is the same ship you told me about?
  GM: Yes.
  Nat: I run back inside.
  • Shortly afterward:
  Nat: With my trusty zip-line, I make my way across the crystal blue ocean below. As I do this, I ponder about my predicament. I worry about the people back home. [...] With cat-like reflexes, I land gracefully onto Alvida's ship. [...] I stealthily and gracefully sneak about.
  GM: Suddenly, someone steps out the door next to you! It's one of Alvida's men!
  Nat: I kick 'em in the balls! ... Gracefully.
• When Luke first appears in the story by popping out of a wine barrel:
  Nat: Wait hold on. You were inside that barrel the whole time?
  Luke: Yep.
  Nat: The barrel made for holding wine.
  Luke: Uh huh...
  Nat: The completely sealed barrel that had to be broken open?
  Luke: That's the one! Anyway, I was probably sleeping in there and didn't notice someone was sealing it up.
  Nat: I get it now.
  GM: You do?
  Nat: Luke's playing an idiot.
• When Cory's character was about to be killed:
  Alvida: Are you prepared to 'DIE', Coby?
  Luffy: Dun Dun Duuuun... wait I thought Cory wanted to die to get a new character?
  Alvida: ...Are you prepared to be KNOCKED OUT?
  Luffy: Dun Dun Duuuun!
• On the very next page, Luke deliberately Epic Fails a Diplomacy check:
  Luffy: Hey Coby...who's this fat hag?
  Coby: (Jaw Drop) You didn't even... roll the die... you just... placed it... on the table... with the 1... on top...
  (Alvida screams)
  GM: Er... yeah, I think you made her mad.
• When entering the tavern:
  Cory: I immediately search for traps.
  GM: Not this again...
  Cory: Damn, got a 4.
  GM: We're in a tavern.
  Cory: Taverns can have traps.
  Luke: One way to spot a trap is to look for an adam's apple.
  Cory: ...I stop searching.
  • The expressions in the screencaps (such as Luffy's deadpan one above) top off these exchanges.
  Cory: Oh c'mon! You let Luke play his character and he's just as if not more overpowered than mine!
  GM: Luke actually came up with a name and a backstory for his character.
  Luke: (as Luffy, blithely smiling) I was raised by owls!
• The GM uses skittles to represent Mooks. Cue this during the second arc:
  Cory: Hooooly Crap. The GM just opened up three bags of skittles.
• Luffy Vs. Mohgi
  GM: Look, you got cover bonus for the bars, okay? But he's likely to either hit you or miss the cage. Unless I roll an 11 or 12.
  * Rolls*
  Gm: Sonuva-
  Luke: FREEDOM!
  GM: Who cursed my dice?
• Under the inexperienced Phil's control, Usopp's introductory lies become him misreading the GM's horrible handwriting. Doesn't help that he's also screwing with him:
  Luke: Hahaha! Did that really just happen? Can we say that's what happened?
  Phil: Look, I'm a pirate, right? So that means I at least have a gun, right?
  GM: Eh... not really. You do have a slingshot, though.
  Phil: ...the fuck?!
  GM: And no, I'm not screwin' with you. About that.
• This exchange, after learning that Luffy and Zoro ate a month's worth of food in a day:
  Phil: Don'tcha think the amount of food Luffy and Zoro are eating is kinda unrealistic?
  Cory: Hey. Back. Picked up three buckets of KFC, tacos, some burgers, hot pockets, Doritos, and half-off sushi. Oh, and those ten bags of Skittles you asked for, GM.
  Phil: Holy shit.
• After Kurahadol shows up and insults Usopp's father, the others try to help Phil by putting words in his mouth.
  DM: You guys are a bunch of idiots. On a separate note, can anyone here do a good Tyson impression?
• Luke fits Luffy REALLY well.
• Any time Luke needs to make an important diplomacy check he pulls out his special dice. Cue the newest player going "WHY IS IT ALL ONES??!??"
  • Prior to getting that die, he took the simple expedient of putting a d20 on the table with the 1 facing up.
  • Luke hitting Buggy's (and the GM's) Berserk Button with a sledgehammer thusly:
  Luke: (as Luffy) HEY CLOWN!!! WHY YOU SUCH A CLOWN?!
• Cory failed on his navigation rolls so bad that he ended up on a whole other island.
  Cory: I have a swim speed, so that's actually kinda plausible.
• "... And then Sanji starved to death and became an undead skeleton!"
• The entire warship island arc qualifies, on account of everyone being so sleep-deprived from their finals that they can’t even think straight.
  • Expect Cory, who ends up being the voice of reason throughout the arc and less munchkin-y to boot