Funny / Moonraker

The Film

  • The Gondola chase scene, which has James piloting a hovercraft down the streets of Venice, to various Reaction Shots, including a dog (with a "you gotta be kidding" expression), a pigeon (which double-takes), and a waiter who pours his patron's drink down his back in shock. It also has two No More for Me gags, with a smoker and a wino tourist.
    • Bond in disguise as a gondolier and using a paddle to pull up to land on his canoe, after driving his previous canoe on land. Then he calmly tosses his hat on the head of the canoe as he does when he enters Moneypenny's office.
  • Bond returning to Earth:
    Q: "I think he's attempting re-entry, sir."
  • Let's not forget this bit where Q gives Bond the wrist dart gun.
    Q: "It's activated by nerve impulses from the wrist muscles."
    Bond: "Like this?" (the dart lands in a painting of King William III on a horse. Specifically, the horse's bottom, so that it looks like the dart caused the horse to jump up)
    Q: "Be careful, will you?"
    Bond: "Yes, Q."
    Q: "Ten darts. Five blue-tipped with armor-piercing heads. Five red-tipped, cyanide coated, causing death in thirty seconds.
    Bond: "Very novel, Q. You must get them in the stores for Christmas."
  • "So, how do you kill five hours in Rio if you don't know how to samba?" Oh James...
  • Jaws preparing to bite Manuela, only to find a bunch of Carnival celebrators coming down the alley at them. He immediately picks her up and begins smiling and swinging her around in a fake drunken dance as the rest of the mob joins in. In some of the long shots it looks like the actress playing Manuela is Corpsing while trying to look scared. When Bond shows up and Jaws closes in to fight, a line of dancers shows up and drags him off. He struggles for a bit, then sort of shrugs and starts dancing along as he gets carried away by the crowd.
    • And Jaws had shown up dressed as one of the giant clown performers, so he sort of stumbled onto the scene and had to take a massive clown head off. During the rest of the not-fight, he's left in a sort of purple gown, polka-dot pants, and white gloves.
    • And when Bond and Jaws first catch sight of each other; Jaws grins and Bond tries to smile back, but it's more like an Oh, Crap! grimace.
  • Jaws flapping his arms trying to fly after tearing the ripcord off his parachutenote .
  • In Venice, Bond discovers a lab where Drax is developing nerve gas. The next morning, he brings M and the Minister of Defence to investigate. They enter the building wearing gas masks, only to find no lab, only Drax sitting comfortably at a desk.
    Drax: You must excuse me, gentlemen. Not being English, I sometimes find your sense of humor rather difficult to follow.
  • Jaws' "You have got to be kidding me!" look on his face when Bond gets away on a hang glider.
  • This quip from Drax, when he and Bond bump into each other again:
    Drax: James Bond. You appear with the tedious inevitability of an unloved season.
    • Also this, when he clues in on Bond's true intentions upon his visit to Drax's personal chateau.
    Drax: (To Chang) Look after Mr. Bond. See that some harm comes to him.
  • "Bollinger. If It's '69, you were expecting me." BA-DUM-CRASH!
  • During his fight with Chang in the glass museum, Bond picks up a priceless glass vase that was prominently displayed earlier...and carefully puts it back when the motion sensor alarm goes off. And then it gets smashed by Chang anyway.
  • Bond attempting to knee Jaws in the crotch aboard the station; the bewildered look on his face when he hears a metal clang is priceless.
  • The doubletaking pigeon in Venice; either for its hilariously bad editing or for the sheer silliness of it.
  • After escaping from Jaws on the cable cars, Holly suddenly gives Bond a kiss.
    Bond: What was that for?
    Holly: For saving my life.
    Bond: Well, remind me to do that more often.
  • Bond's very straightforward introduction of Jaws to Dr. Goodhead while atop the cable car.
    Holly: You know him?
    Bond: Not socially. His name is Jaws, he kills people.
    Smeghead: I wonder if that's what it says on his business cards: "Jaws, kills people, will travel".
  • Upon arriving at the Drax residence, which is a French chateau brought to California brick by brick, Bond muses that he should have bought the Eiffel Tower as well.
    Corinne: He did, but the French government refused him an export permit.

The Novel