Funny / Impact Wrestling

• The absolute look of horror on Kurt Angle's face as he, stripped to his skivvies and sprawled on his behind on the entrance ramp, watched his (ex-)wife Karen and AJ Styles be pronounced man and wife was priceless.
• The Paparazzi Championship Series.
  • During the psychological exam portion, Senshi answers every inkblot as a "Warrior".
    Kevin Nash: Are you gonna tell me for one second that that doesn't, to some degree, look like Jim Hellwig??
  • This interesting bit of dialogue between Nash and Jay Lethal:
    Kevin Nash: So, Jay, have you ever, uh... actually administered... a lethal injection?
    Jay Lethal: ...have you ever been to Fire Island?
    Kevin Nash: I actually have a summer home there. Thanks for asking.
  • When Alex Shelley was shown an inkblot, he replied "My heart, after you broke it." and "PlayStation 3"
• At TNA Hard Justice 2006, the arena had to be evacuated mid-show due to a fire. Desperate to fill time until the Orlando Fire Department gave the all-clear and allowed the TNA wrestlers, staff, and fans back into the arena, Mike Tenay interviewed "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown. The result? The Best. Promo. Ever.
  Monty Brown: Hey~ Joe~^note Samoa Joe, that is? Why you runnin' 'round with that...cheeseburger in yo' hand?!
  • It wasn't just Monty's promo that made this night hilarious. The show's opening pyro display had literally set the ceiling on fire. The fans had all kinds of fun with this, chanting "You can't see us!" as a giant cloud of extinguisher enveloped the ring during the opening match (which Eric Young and Johnny Devine worked to a finish), and later "No more pyro!" when everyone was back inside and Abyss (who always had pyro back then) came out for his match.
    • The best part was when the Impact Zone started chanting "THE ROOF...THE ROOF...THE ROOF IS ON FIRE!"
    • Part of the chanting can be heard here.
• At the start of their classic Unbreakable 2005 match, Samoa Joe and AJ Styles gang up on Christopher Daniels. Joe nails a falling Daniels with a savage kick across the back that can be heard through the area. AJ pushes him back, yelling "that's not how you do it!" He then kicks Daniels himself and yells at Joe "that's how you do it!" Joe nodded as if thinking "okay, not bad" and then kicks Daniels again. AJ waves a finger at him before giving Daniels another kick. The payoff is Daniels leaping to his feet screaming "Stop...kicking me!"....and Joe kicks him across the chest while Styles kicks him in the legs.
• The 2007 Victory Road, where Voodoo Kin Mafia revealed their plan to finally rid themselves of Christy Hemme: voodoo queen Roxi Laveaux. The crowd reaction was priceless.
  "What is that!"
• Chet Lemon, Black Snow, and ring announcer Scott Steiner. This originated from an episode of Impact in January of '09, where the Main Event Mafia took over the show for around an hour. Kevin Nash (Lemon) and Booker T (Snow, doing what sounded like a hilariously awful Don West impression) proceeded to take the piss out of almost everything during an otherwise-mediocre show. Smarks were very displeased when Mike Tenay and Don West returned to the announce booth.
• Taylor Wilde vs. Velvet Sky - the quickest wrestling match in history.
• In 2009, The Beautiful People had ridden a crooked referee to the top of the knockouts division (both figuratively and literally). So, at the biggest show of the year, Bound For Glory, they tried to right this wrong by sending in Earl Hebner. Unfortunately, TNA did not book this with its audience in mind, which lead to chants of "You Screwed Bret!" and booing when Hebner tried to stop the Beautiful People from cheating. Note, Canadian (and best wrestler in the group) Angelina Love wasn't even involved, they were against Canadian and supremely talented Taylor Wilde and Sarita. The crowd sided with the Beautiful People simply because of Hebner!
• At the 2009 Slammiversy where the referee insists Chris Sabin is ineligible for him to count a pin fall for in a King Of The Mountain match, so he lays down and lets Alex Shelley pin him and then complains about his tights being pulled as he goes into the penalty box.
• The Impact episode where Angle emerges from a tanning bed, only to find his clothes gone.
  Angle: "Is it one of those freaks who want to sell my underwear, on eBay!?"
• After turning Jay Lethal into "Black Machismo", Kevin Nash tries to do the same thing with Sonjay Dutt by having him try on his old "Oz" and "Vinnie Vegas" costumes. When he shows up wearing the oversized "Diesel" outfit, Lethal comments (in his Macho Man voice): "Now you can step over the top rope!"
• Last Call with Scott Hall. REALLY not safe for work, what with the not entirely sober Hall and Waltman ripping on various people and harassing any woman in the vicinity.
  • Watching Larry Zbyszko in the latest vids just burying himself deeper and deeper (calling AJ Styles a "faggot", constantly ripping on Ric Flair) is like watching a trainwreck, but Scott's running commentary on Zbyszko ("I'm so sorry, he thinks he's funny", "that makes him a bastard - sorry kids, that's the word for it") makes up for it.
  • Kevin Nash in the Wolfpac dressing room, a week before he turned heel onscreen: "Uh, I'm still very angry at you guys."
  • And later, in a discussing spanning illegal drug use, wacky drug trips at the Canadian border and fake tanning:
    Scott: It was like, a week later. We couldn't get into Canada-
    Kevin: ... cause we all had gun charges.
    Kevin: And we had something like fourteen Somas, and no scrips.
    Scott: So what does any responsible person do, kids?
    Kevin: We ate 'em.
    Waltman: What, like, seven each?
    Scott: We can't throw them out the window! That would be littering!

    Kevin: (demonstrating how his hands were shaking) And I'm all - 'Scott? Do I look fucked up?'
    Scott: And I'm like YES!
    • Pretty much any time you get Nash, Hall, and Waltman together, it's comedy gold.
• During Kurt Angle and Sting's feud, there was a part where Sting's music plays and he's lowered from the ceiling. In a moment of cunning, Kurt spears the figure in midair and puts it in the Ankle Lock, before he realizes that it's just a dummy.
• This incredible limited-time offer from the Motor City Machine Guns! Dammit, if only I had known about it in 2009, then I wouldn't have wasted that extra $2000 I had on boring shit like food and bills.
  • Don't forget their PSA on Beer Money.
• The Pope is a very funny dude, but this moment comes more from his reaction. D'Angelo Dinero has an opening that consists of him pausing, looking at the sky, and having money rain down from above onto him, but ever since Immortal took over TNA and the Pope opposed them, they stopped paying for the (fake) money rain and the Pope's continued hopeful wait for the rain and his exasperated head shake as it never happens is hilarious.
• The look on Jeff Hardy's face when he saw AJ and Fortune do their hand sign in front of him and then proceed to take out all of his allies, leading him alone. His dumbstruck expression can only be described by two words: Oh, Crap!.
• Mr. Anderson (Anderson)'s thoughts on the new TNA championship belt, designed by and for Jeff Hardy (it looks like his face, with similar strangely colored makeup patterns, and comes on a purple strap):
  Mr. Anderson: I could probably stick a crayon up my ass, squat over a piece of paper, and draw a better title belt than this.
  • Anderson is a walking Crowning Moment Of Funny, one of the reasons he's cheered so strongly is he's able to make nearly anything absolutely hilarious.
• Taz on Feb 17th 2011 calling himself a Segway machine.
• The crowd at the Impact Zone gets a lot of crap for dumb chants, chanting for anything and seemingly trying to get themselves over. Whether fair or not it's subjective but what's not is their chant towards Chris Harris, ex-tag team partner of Beer Money member James Storm, being incredibly funny. "Knock knock? Who's there? Braden Walker!" ^note Braden Walker was the name Chris Harris used during is very, VERY, short stint in the revived ECW.
  • Heard here. Gotta give James Storm credit for keeping a straight face.
• May 19, 2011: Velvet Sky shoves Karen Jarrett in a wheelchair down the entrance ramp, where Jeff tries and fails to catch her.
• June 2, 2011: A.J. Styles cuts off Bully Ray's rant by saying Ray has a tiny penis. Ray has a Villainous Breakdown ordering the audience to stop laughing at him and making fun of his penis.
• June 16, 2011: Eric Young assaults a backstage interviewer and pins him to "defend" his TV Title, with the interviewer waking up and asking what just happened. And Scott Steiner's Hot-Blooded mockery of Bully Ray.
• Christopher Daniels hams it up while giving an art tour.
• The stipulation for the Mickie James vs. Gail Kim match at Genesis 2012? Madison Rayne has to be suspended above the ring in a shark cage.
• Sarita has a habit of salsa dancing during her matches. During one Xplosion match against Angelina Love she kept doing it so much that Taz started singing along to her moves. Oh and the whole "Mui Caliente" thing gets honorable mention as well.
• Christopher Daniels and Kazarian's heel promo about wanting a rematch for the World Tag Team Championships after losing them to Chavo and Hernandez. Exhibit A of why current heel Daniels is the most entertaining wrestler alive.
• Oppa WTTCOTW Style!
  • And on the Impact before that, Oppa Daniels Style!
• Robbie T does a Bro Off and owns Robbie E, Jesse, and Tara leaving them speechless and wondering what just happened.
  • It happened again the week afterward, with Miss Tessmacher getting in on it.
• Bad Influence (AKA Daniels and Kazarian) opening the January 31st episode of Impact from Manchester England dressed as Highlanders. Complete with kilts and facepaint.
  • Bad Influence proceeded to top this on the March 14th episode of Impact from Chicago by dressing up as the Road Warriors.
• Austin Aries and Bobby Roode having a match at the London Impact and both agreeing to be professionals and doing the Finger Poke of Doom and telling the other to lie down for him so he could win. When that doesn't work they start fighting and when the ref got distracted Roode tosses a chair to Aries and falls down acting like he's been hit only for Aries to fall down as well leaving a confused Ref wondering what's going on as both claim the other hit him.
• At the Jokers Wild show, Matt Morgan and Joey Ryan get tagged in together and Joey realizes he's got no chance. After a few ineffectual shots by Joey, Morgan just shrugs and kicks his head off with the Carbon Footprint and pins him.
  • Also from it, Samoa Joe's reaction to finding out Christopher Daniels is his selected partner. You can hear him mouth the word Fuck.
• One time, during Angelina Love and Velvet Sky's classic Fanservice-heavy entrance, a camera man tried to cop a feel of Velvet's butt. Velvet angrily kicks the guy in the face.
• May 9, 2013: Christy Hemme accidentally announces Christopher Daniels and Kaz when Bobby Rhode and Austin Aries were doing their entrance. They get mad. Later, Aries and Kaz blind each other, then tag each other and go to the wrong corners while trying to find their tag partners.
  • Abyss' return has one. As he's charging the ring to help Sting and Kurt Angle against Aces & Eights, Anderson charges straight at him. Abyss doesn't even bother stopping as he punches Anderson in the head and keeps right on going. While it is awesome, there's something inherently funny about the fact Abyss barely even seemed to care about Anderson enough to stop or even look at him and just plowed right through him.
• June 6, 2013: After Jeff Hardy dropkicks a ladder into Bully Ray's groin, Bully screams, "My balls!" and spends the rest of the episode holding his groin and barely able to walk.
• June 27, 2013: Robbie E, Jesse Godderz, and Tara interrupt James Storm and Gunner's promo. Robbie says "This train has sailed down the road", which makes everybody laugh. Them, Robbie calls his team the "Bro Mans". Storm mocks this lame name by asking if Robbie just called his team "Bromance".
• Daniels and Kazarian coming out during the July 4th show at Las Vegas dressed as Siegfried and Roy.
• During the Hardcore Justice 2 One Night Only event, a weapons gauntlet battle royal is held with everyone bringing a type of weapon to the ring. What does Shark Boy bring? A Giant Fish.
• In order to build rapport with her audience, Dixie Carter started an AMA on Twitter. It was IMMEDIATELY hijacked.
• August 22, 2013: ODB hits Gail Kim with a Groin Attack. Gail screams and clutches her groin, and Tazz asks why that hurt her.
• Christopher Daniels gives the official name for Bad Influence's alliance with Bobby Roode: the Extraordinary Gentlemen's Organization.
  • Their induction of Roode into their own Hall of Fame after he was snubbed by TNA's official Hall of Fame for Kurt Angle is Start My Own taken to absurd heights.
• Robbie E loses back to back to Eric Young and Joseph Park, total time of the matches? About twenty seconds combined.
• The 24/7 concept has resulted in yet more hilarity from Christopher Daniels. Here he is on the phone with Kazarian and before taking his kids to a Halloween party.
• The Funeral for Aces and Eights and the Food Fight from the Thanksgiving Episode.
• Feb. 13, 2014: Velvet Sky hits Chris Sabin with a low blow, but he says he came prepared and was wearing a cup. He pulls it out and shows it off to the crowd... and then she hits him with a low blow.
• There was a lot to like about Spud's tribute to Dixie on the March 13th 2014 episode in terms of comedy. Two highlights were: Spud yelling "SHUT UP!" in response to the nonstop crowd chants, and the look on EC3's face when Spud describes him as "young, supple Ethan".
  • Following that, when MVP was motivating Spud to wrestle, he says "Size does matter." EC3 looks right at the camera and nods his head.
• MVP flubbing his lines on the June 19, 2014 episode. "Tag of the - WAAAAAH!"
• Ric Flair vs. Jay Lethal's Ric Flair impression.
• The Final Deletion, wherein TNA takes every modicum of 'lolTNA' it ever possessed and channeled it into making something absolutely beautiful.
• The Obsolete Song, as sung by Matt, Reby, Nero, Señor Benjamin, and... Vanguard 1.
• Matt Hardy makes fun of WWE while burying Trevor Lee and Andrew Everett with the Hurricane.

  Matt Hardy: Even the man with three H's would be proud of the way we buried this young, promising talent!

• The Wrestle House segments rife with funny moments between the wrestlers living there, but the best part is where Tommy Dreamer shows up to start matches everytime.

  Tommy Dreamer: Match Time!

• Every segment involving Johnny Swinger is guaranteed as comedy gold!

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