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Fanfic: The Phrase That Pais

What My Immortal is to Harry Potter, The Phrase That Pais is to Total Drama Island. It's a fic that follows the adventures of Jasmine Alice Canary Ramirez Tansho.

Jasmine gets a call from ~~Chris~~ Kris asking her if she wants to be on Total Drama. She accepts happily and immediately attracts the attention of all the boys. And Bridgette.

Duncan dumps Gwen and Courtney for Jasmine, then they go to the pool and make out. You can guess what happens from here.

The fic has ended, but a sequel

is in the works.

You could read the fic here.

, but it's been taken down.

This fanfic contains examples of:

Anatomically Impossible Sex: And the fic is rated K.
Anything That Moves: Jasmine
Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: Noah breaks up with Cody because "he wuss bein a douche n had a bad hairctu."
Audio Erotica: Duncan, evidently.
Author Avatar: Jasmine.
Author Appeal: The author really likes Duncan. Really.
Break the Cutie: Gwen.
Cloud Cuckoolander: Erin from the sequel, who has a random obsession with guinea pigs.
Erin: Sorree I was lookin' for da magical guinea pig of wander!
Dear Negative Reader: This happens often.
Department of Redundancy Department: ""lets nME HIM Ldydude kawai tansho-mcclean" Kris sagt so we narmd him ladydude kawaii tansho-mcclean."
Dramatic Ellipsis: In Chapter 7.
Dual Wielding: The psycho killer with a chainsaw has two (?) hooks.
Even the Girls Want Her: Bridgette.
Fandom Specific Plot: The sequel is a submit-your-own-OC fic.
Freudian Slip: She wears a black shi(r)t.
Follow the Leader: Or more, bash the leader.
Gratuitous German: "Ja" being used in Chapter 1.
- Chapter 14 uses the word "sagte" twice and the phrase "Ich liebe sie."
- "Das" is often used to replace "the."
Gratuitous Japanese: Jasmine's love of the word "kawaii."
Freud Was Right: The volcano.
Insult Backfire: The reviewers take being called "Gwen" as a compliment.
Killed Off for Real: Possibly Gwen, who has not appeared since she died in chapter 10.
May-December Romance: Jasmine does it with Chef, then gets pregnant and Chris marries her.
My God, What Have I Done?: Averted when Ezakill kills her girlfrond Brig, and then starts to make out with Jasmine.
One-Scene Wonder: Gwen shows up in Chapters 2, 4, and 10 and is never seen again.
- Justin is in chapter 6 for some reason, dies, and is never seen again.
Overly-Long Name: Guess who.
- The sequel has two more examples: Mary Natalie Samantha Isabella Stacy Candy Mindy Mandy Jessica Solange Loreley Sue Perfect (dubbed "Bitchwipe") and Alan Fisherman Muzic Aladdin Raven Way.
Paper-Thin Disguise: It couldn't be more obvious that the author is reviewing her own fic.
The Quiet One: Anna from the sequel.
Random Events Plot: And how.
Running Gag: Bitchwipe constantly dying.
Rouge Angles of Satin: But of course!
Saying Sound Effects Out Loud: "Gasp" I gaspdd.
- "Everyone gasped and yelled! "GASO!" TEHY GASPYELLED"
Shout Out: At one point while trying to apologize to Jasmine, Duncan calls her "Jasmine Alice Starkit Ramirez Tansho".
Small Name, Big Ego: The author. Oh so much.
Suddenly Sexuality: Noah becomes "strait" and Bridgette suddenly decides she's a lesbian because of Jasmine.
- Possibly Jasmine herself, who originally thinks "kissin gurlz is gros" and kisses Bridgette the very next chapter.
This Loser Is You: If Alternate Character Interpretation works as the same way as in My Immortal, Jasmine is a parody of Duncan fangirls.
- Also, the reviewers who try to argue with the author.
- The entire fic seems to be a parody of OC fics, self-insert or otherwise.
Troll Fic
- Confirmed.
Unexplained Recovery: Bitchwipe dies once a chapter. She's always alive again at the beginning of the next one.
Unfortunate Names: One character in the sequel is named Anna Van Dyke.
Unusual Euphemism: Anyone who doesn't like the fic is called a "Gwen."
Who Names Their Kid "Dude"?: Jasmine's baby is named Ladydude Kawaii Tansho-Mclean.
Yaoi Fangirl: Jasmine.
Artistic License - Biology: Jasmine is pregnant for two days.
You Gotta Have Blue Hair: Jasmine's hair has purple and blue streaks. And it lookz wai cooler than Gwen's hair.