Describe The Modestly Interesting Adventures Of Hammond Cheese
Oh, what a delightful idea!
Once upon a time, there was a young man by the name of Hammond Cheese
who worked as a kindergarten teacher. Normally, he wouldn't be very remarkable, except for the fact that he could see through the illusions put up by the supernatural
, a power called the Sight. When he's not teaching small children to read and write, Ham
is investigating the activities of the supernatural underworld with his friend/sometimes-roommate
David (a Gold Digger
and witch), his constant companion Nona
, and his Good Friend Mel
This work-in-progress by Turtleducks
and Big Blue
will become a series — eventually.
Full of nasty Fae
, gods aplenty
, and most any other supernatural creature you can think of.
Tropes that apply:
- Affably Evil: Valley. He's always a gentleman and appears to have everyone's best interest in mind... at least, until he rips out your throat and rapes your children. On occasion, he will help out Ham, much to the latter's dismay.
- All Myths Are True (as long as someone believes in them)
- Alter Kocker: Yahweh and Asmodeus.
- Author Appeal: A lot of it, but most prominently Jewish characters, big beautiful women, and what turned into a bad case of Everyone Is Bi.
- Badass Normal: Mel might not have any actual powers, but you do not want to mess with her.
- Bad Boss: Beelz wishes she could be this, but alas, the Agency has her on too tight a leash for her to be allowed to do any real damage.
- Betty and Veronica: Starring sweet, innocent Nona as Betty, and snarky, free-spirited Mel as Veronica.
- Big Beautiful Woman: Beelz. Enforced by the fact that she can look however she wants, and chooses to be large and in charge. (It turns out that this is also the case for many goddesses.)
- Bi the Way: David
- Bondage Is Bad: Uh, averted.
- Black and Nerdy: David might be a musclebound bed-hopper, but he's also a tremendous Star Wars fan.
- Black Best Friend: David.
- The Casanova: Also David
- City of Adventure: Forrester, the magic capital of Canada.
- Cute Ghost Girl: Nona
- Complete Monster: The Sophisticates, including Valley.
- Deadly Decadent Court: The Sophisticates (vampires who drink human blood from the source and have retained their humanity) and some of the Fae.
- Eldritch Abomination: Mother, (From Whence Came All Evil in the World!) to Ham. To everyone else, she just looks like a little old lady.
- Expy: Sophisticates John and Karen are expies of Edward and Bella. It gets much worse.
- The Fair Folk: The few Fae that Ham comes in contact with are, in a word, batshit. His mind can't even process them.
- Fantasy Kitchen Sink
- Femme Fatale: Beelzebub herself.
- Foe Yay: Valley fancies himself in love with Ham, which in no way stops him from trying to murder him.
- Gods Need Prayer Badly
- Grandpa God: Yahweh (and Asmodeus is a Grandpa Devil.)
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: Ham and David, but Yahweh and Asmodeus even more so— they've been living together for two-thousand years.
- Hot Librarian: Ham's on-again off-again love intrest, Mel Duguet.
- I See Dead People: Ham especially, but anyone Enlightened (read: supernatural) can, too.
- Magnificent Bastard: Valley, one of the few not-insane human-hunting vampires in Forrester.
- The Masquerade
- Mistaken for Gay: Ham, a lot.
- Our Monsters Are Different
- Pals with Jesus: He wears Crocs.
- Punny Name: Ham, oh Ham. He lampshades it when talking about his family: He's an only child because his parents couldn't think of any more punny names to give their children.
- Satan: Used weirdly. There are six Devils, all adopted children of Mother, all responsible for tempting people on Earth.
- Spin-Offspring: Or, at least, a Sequel Hook with Ham's daughter, Nancy.
- Unfazed Everyman: Ham
- Urban Fantasy: The entire story, minus some backstory elements, takes place in the city of Forrester.
- Victorian Britain: Nona originally lived in this time period. It shows.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: Yahweh and Asmodeus (who actually refer to each other as "Enemy"). Sometimes Ham and David.