Mark and the late, great Henry the Dog
Mark Prindle is a music reviewer from New York, focusing on all types of rock music. Being active since 1996, his homepage
, is one of the oldest and most influential record reviewing sites on the web, having inspired many others to write about music, such as George Starostin
Unlike most rock journalists, he doesn't limit himself to talk solely about the album in question - Prindle adds curious anecdotes, random jokes, and lots of profanity (this is mostly done for the sake of humour). It should also be noted that he's not afraid of saying what he thinks about any artists, which often results in negative reviews given to universally praised musicians (like Velvet Underground
His favourite artists include The Ramones
, the Cows, The Fall
, Pink Floyd
, The Pixies
, and many others.
On December 27, 2011 he announced that he has retired from reviewing, as he feels that he has completely moved on with his life. Godspeed you, Mr. Prindle.
Mark Prindle provides examples of:
- Accidental Misnaming: Type B (veering into A, depending on the album/artist). Often when reviewing one album, he'll refer to another (and sometimes to the artist/band itself) with a similar-sounding humorous name (for example, when reviewing an AC/DC bootleg, he refers to Let There Be Rock as "Let Me Suck Cock" and "Let There Be Socks" - and he gave that album a 9/10, mind you).
- Actually Pretty Funny: His negative reviews, whether you agree with them or not.
- In his review of an early Beatles live recording.
- "Does he think he's funny when he changes the 'Mr. Moonlight' lyric to 'Here I am on my NOSE'? Okay, he sorta is."
- Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: On the outrageous behaviour of GG Allin: "he would smash himself in the head with the microphone, beat his fans up, poop on stage, eat it, throw it at the crowd, work diligently to rise to the top ranks of a Fortune 500 company..." Not quite a straight example though, because that's just the start of a long list.
- Berserk Button: Dynamic overcompression apparently. "If there's ONE THING I hate in this world, it's dynamic overcompression! You can steal my car, wreck my face, toss my penis all over the place, do anything to aid yourself in this recession, but don't you gimme no overcompression!"
- Although it seems to be a parody of an anti-dynamic over-compression rant from a reader comment on a different review.
- Real misogyny is another thing that Prindle cant stand, which he made clear in his reviews for Frank Zappas "Tinseltown Rebellion" and The Descendants "Milo Goes To College".
- Breathless Non Sequitur: Many of his reviews rapidly alternate between discussing the album in question and discussing anything else.
- Broke the Rating Scale: Madonna's American Life, the only album he's reviewed that's gotten a zero out of ten.
- Captain Obvious: He begins his video review of Yes solo and side projects with "Yes is a band with albums and people in it."
- In his video review for God Fodder by Ned's Atomic Dustbin, he begins lip syncing and then immediately clarifies, "That's not really me singing, it's the guy on the CD!"
- Catch Phrase: When he reviews bad albums, he usually starts with "More like [insert witty pun on the album's name] if you ask me!"
- Caustic Critic
- Cloud Cuckoolander
- Cluster F-Bomb: It has happened (the following is an excerpt of his review of P!nk's I'm Not Dead).
- "(...)an awful, awful, brutal, miserable, godFUCKINGAWFUL bowl of manure pressed into CD form. This is her attempt to show that she's grown into a mature female singer-songwriter, and it is oh sweet Christ SO FUCKING FUCKBAD."
- Dog Existence Failure: Unfortunately. In Henry's honor, both the weekly Photo of Henry The Dog feature and the video reviews (which nearly always involved Henry in some way) have been discontinued.
- Humor Dissonance: Invoked in his review of Frank Zappa's Zoot Allures in which he sarcastically acts as though the Pun-Based Title is the funniest play on words ever.
- Long List: The Flaming Lips put the name of anyone who donated one hundred dollars to a charity in the lyrics to their six hour song "I Found A Star On The Ground". So, Mark put the name of anyone who donated one dollar to his paypal account in his review of Strobo Trip, the album it was on. Thus, the review includes video of him reciting names of readers for six minutes.
- Long Title: Some of his own songs are examples of this. Most notably, "My Songs Would Be Significantly Less Sucky If I Bothered To Save Up For More Powerful Recording Equipment" and "Honey Child, You Ain't Lived Until You've Drafted A Press Release Announcing That GameSpy Industries Has Received An Equity Investment From Michael Ovitz And The Yucaipa Companies"
- Mondegreen: His review of The Exploited's Punk's Not Dead discusses how he first heard the title track on a college radio program without hearing the title, and thus thought the chorus was "Force your dinner down!" instead of "Punk's not dead, oh no!". A fan responded by writing a Song Parody based on the mondegreen, effectively making it a more violent version of "Eat It". Similarly, while praising The Hollies' song "Pay You Back With Interest":
...and best of all, the way it sounds like they're singing "I'll pay you back with entrails!" as if The Hollies were the founders of grindcore
- MST: In his review of Tori Amos' "Scarlet's Walk", he cuts and pastes All-Music's take on that same album, and gives his counter-point to every statement.
- My Friends... and Zoidberg: "Rest in peace, Mr. Ron Asheton. You gave us three great Stooges albums and The Weirdness".
- "Not Making This Up" Disclaimer: He dedicated a portion of his Strobo Trip review to mentioning that "I Found a Star on the Ground" actually is six hours long and is not just him exaggerating the length like he does when he describes many long, tedious songs.
- One of Us: At the end of his review of Red Barked Tree by Wire, he links this page.
- Pungeon Master: Other than the frequent "More like [pun on the album title] if you ask me," gag, he makes a lot of puns throughout his reviews. Just one of many examples: in his review of Opiate by Tool, he says, "Like the pole of a lobotomised fisherman, this album has 'NO HOOKS!'"
- Running Gag: On his The Rolling Stones review page, every studio album released after Some Girls is called some variation of "The best Stones album since Some Girls!", with varying degrees of sarcasm. This includes Emotional Rescue, which was also the first Rolling Stones album since Some Girls.
- Rhymes on a Dime: The reviews of Incesticide by Nirvana and Taller Than All by The Black Crowes are done entirely in this style.
- Self-Deprecation: On his review of Dinosaur Jr.'s "Beyond", he examines his old writing style as featured in that artist's page, and is embarrassed of what he finds.
- He reviewed a Greatest Hits album by The Jam from the point of view of a seven year old, and the last line was "I just read some of Mark Prindle's CD reviews. Is he seven too?"
- There's a best of compilation of his music that was released by a small independent label, which is titled My Wife Left Me Because These Songs Are Terrible. The "these songs are terrible" part needs no explanation, but it was released not long after his divorce.
- He claims that an April 2011 Facebook status update announcing his intent to review Anal Cunt is what caused Seth Putnam's fatal heart attack less than two months later.
- Shaped Like Itself: In his God Bullies reviews, he states that their album Kill The King "actually sounds more like Mike Hard's post-God Bullies band Thrall than his during-God Bullies band The God Bullies".
- Shown Their Work: He covers the entire discography of every artist he reviews (including bootlegs and rare releases), including those he hates with a passion (e.g. The Smashing Pumpkins). What more do you want?
- Too Good to Last