Quotes / Religious Russian Roulette

Calvin: In order to determine if there is any universal moral law beyond human convention, I have devised the following test.
Calvin: I will throw this water balloon at Susie Derkins unless I receive some sign within the next 30 seconds that this is wrong.
Calvin: It is in the universe's power to stop me. I'll accept any remarkable physical happenstance as the sign that I shouldn't do this. Ready?... GO!
Calvin: Tum te tum doo doo ...
Calvin: Nothing's happeniinngg... five seconds to go!
Calvin: TIME'S UP! That proves it! There's no moral law! WHEEE! Ha ha!
Calvin: HEY SUSIE!! *SPLOOSH*
Calvin: HELP! HELP! HELP!
[...]
Calvin: Why does the universe always give you the sign AFTER you do it??

— Calvin tests the universe, Calvin and Hobbes

Calvin: On 'THREE,' ready? One... two... three!
Calvin: SNOW!
[...]
Calvin: I SAID SNOW! C'MON! SNOW!
Calvin: SNOW!
Calvin: OK, then, don't snow! See what I care! I LIKE this weather! Let's have it forever!
Calvin: PLEEAASE snow! Please?? Just a foot! Ok, eight inches! That's all! C'mon! Six inches, even! How about just six??
Calvin: I'M WAAIITING...
Calvin: RRRRGGHHH
Calvin: DO YOU WANT ME TO BECOME AN ATHEIST?

Calvin demands snow, Calvin and Hobbes

Do not put the Lord your God to the test as you did at Massah.

— Deuteronomy 6:16