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Live Blogs The Adventure of Failure Shepard or How Not to Play the Mass Effect Trilogy
lrrose2013-04-02 20:24:59

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Sorry for the delay. I've been feeling a bit under the weather.

Admiral Hackett informs Fail Shep that the quarians are seeking aid taking back their homeworld of Rannoch and are willing to help Earth in return.

Fail Shep meets with the Quarian Admiralty Board, who explain that they used some anti-synthetic tech Admiral Xen invented to kick the geth's asses. Everything was going according to plan until the Reapers suddenly took over the geth and made them incredibly powerful.

The Reapers are controlling the geth using a signal that is coming from a dreadnaught. The quarians have tried unsuccessfully to destroy the dreadnaught, but the thing is overpowered even by dreadnaught standards. With the Normandy's stealth drive, Fail Shep can sneak on board the ship and deactivate the signal from the inside. Assisting him are Admiral Xen and her magical NPC teleportation powers.

Sadly, Xen's not an interesting traveling companion, though she does make some geth who try to attack her dance and serve her food (sadly, this happens offscreen). Trying to deactivate the signal from the dreadnaught's control center fails, so our heroes have to go to the signal's source in the drive core. The geth figure out what Fail Shep is trying to do, so they lock most of the doors. Xen saves the day by hacking the doors blocking access to the dreadnaught's main battery. After dodging a million shockwaves from the main guns, Fail Shep reaches the drive core and finds the signal's source: Legion.

This isn't actually a save import error. Turns out you only get the Geth VI if you sell Legion to Cerberus. The geth that Fail Shep finds in the drive core is a backup of Legion that was created when it was shot searching for Fail Shep on Eden Prime. As such, it has no memory of traveling with Fail Shep, although it knows who he is.

Legion reveals that the geth voluntarily joined the Reapers, but only because they believed that it was the only way to avoid extinction at the hands of the quarians. Legion was against this move and so it was imprisoned in the drive core and used to transmit the Reaper signal. Fail Shep releases the AI shackles holding Legion and the geth returns the favor by dropping the dreadnaught's shields.

Admiral Gerrel repays Fail Shep by opening fire on the dreadnaught while he and Xen are still on board. Interestingly, with Tail dead, Raan opposes Gerrel's decision to assault the dreadnaught only because the latter is being such a Leeroy Jenkins about it. She is perfectly willing to sacrifice Fail Shep and Xen for victory.

Fail Shep, the squad and Legion manage to reach a geth shuttle in the nick of time and Xen joins them via her magical NPC teleportation powers. Back on the Normandy, Fail Shep forgives Gerrel, as he respects Gerrel for sharing his distaste for competence.

The quarian-geth war is not over yet. Legion informs the Admiralty that the Reapers have a second signal generator on Rannoch. Legion can locate this Reaper base, but it needs time.

Fail Shep takes the time to get to know Legion again and learns that this Legion is a huge dick who hates all organics and is only helping Fail Shep because siding with the Reapers is stupid.

EMS: 997

Death List:

  • Countless Mooks and civilians
  • Jenkins (Squadmate, Plot)
  • Nihlus (Plot)
  • Fist
  • Stirling
  • Anoleis
  • Gianna
  • Ventralis
  • Benezia (Plot)
  • Rachni Queen
  • Peak 15 Scientists
  • Talitha
  • Conrad
  • Jeong
  • Zhu's Hope Colonists
  • Fai Dan (Plot)
  • The Thorian (Plot)
  • Shiala
  • Tonn Actus (Mission)
  • Wayne
  • Toombs
  • Kirrahe
  • Menos Avot (Plot)
  • Droyas (Plot)
  • Ganto Imness
  • Ashley (Squadmate, Love Interest)
  • Saren (Plot)
  • Sovereign (Plot)
  • Pressly (Plot)
  • Fail Shep (Plot, Resurrected)
  • 20 Normandy Crewmen (Plot)
  • Wilson (Squadmate, Plot)
  • Prazza (Plot)
  • Whitson
  • Jaroth (Plot)
  • Garm (Plot)
  • Jentha (Plot)
  • Tarak (Plot)
  • Kuril (Plot)
  • Jedore (Plot)
  • Okeer (Plot)
  • Daniel
  • Abducted Horizon Colonists (Plot)
  • Kal'Reeger
  • Kureck (Mission)
  • Aresh
  • Niftu Cal
  • Wasea (Mission)
  • Nassana (Mission)
  • Niket (Mission)
  • Enyala (Mission)
  • Weyrloc Guld (Mission)
  • Maelon
  • Rael'Zorah (Plot)
  • Talid
  • Legion (Squadmate, Sort of Resurrected)
  • Thane (Squadmate)
  • Garrus (Squadmate)
  • The Original Crew of the Normandy SR-2, including:
    • Kelly (Quasi-Love Interest)
    • Gardner
    • Ken and Gabby
  • Jacob (Squadmate)
  • Mordin (Squadmate)
  • Grunt (Squadmate)
  • Miranda (Squadmate)
  • Tali (Squadmate)
  • Collector General (Plot)
  • Zaeed (Squadmate)
  • Feron
  • The Shadow Broker (Plot)
  • The Boy (Plot)
  • Primarch Fedorian (Plot)
  • Dr. Eva (Plot)
  • Aeian T'Goni
  • Rana (Plot)
  • Charr (Plot)
  • Dagg (Mission)
  • Wreav
  • Eve
  • Padok
  • Valern
  • Udina (Plot)
  • Kaidan (Squadmate)
  • Kahlee
  • Tashya Porae (Plot)
  • Rila (Mission)
  • Samara (Squadmate)
  • Falere

Comments

EndarkCuli Since: Dec, 1969
Apr 2nd 2013 at 10:26:03 PM
Oh, don't worry about delays; my own update schedule is absolutely bonkers, and this blog is certainly good enough to wait for. Plus, April 1st is one of those dates that's probably best viewed from a secure bunker.

Also, it's a bit sad to hear that this version of Legion is far less sympathetic than one that would have had the honour of working alongside its hero for a few years, or however long the time gap between the end of the last game and Shep's reinstatement would have been. Then again, would that Legion's survival mean that this Legion would be considered obsolete and spend its days unable to fulfill its purpose? Oh, how the VIs and AIs of this series confound me sometimes...
Peteman Since: Dec, 1969
Apr 3rd 2013 at 11:03:56 AM
Given the capacity for screwing things up, I wonder if you could maximize the failure by keeping a few more squadmates alive in the suicide mission. In a maximized screwed playthrough, you could probably afford to keep Grunt, Tali, Jack, Samara, and Zaeed alive, though admittedly, Tali and Jack would be hard to keep in a maximized screwed playthrough. That way, you can let Chakwas die unguarded on her way back.

A no-loyalty mission Grunt can die keeping Shepard alive in ME 3, saving the Reaper abomination rachni breeder, and you can keep him alive by not releasing him until after the Suicide Mission if need be. Tali dies if you side with the Geth, though keeping the heretics alive and helping the quarians might be better for worse. If you don't save Grissom Academy, Jack is turned into a Phantom. Samara can pointlessly kill herself to save her daughter, whom you'll kill anyway. And Zaeed can have his loyalty mission done after the fight, where you'll leave him to burn to death. With the added muscle, you might be able to let Cerberus take Legion.
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