PREVIOUSLY ON WHEN WORLDS COLLIDE: VS. THE BOSKEYVERSE!
FUCK THIS FANFIC!
Wataru: You wonder why I keep his anger levels down?
{clips of Psyga destroying the fanfic show}
Wataru: This is why. The best we can do now is to feed Psyga’s blood thirst. When this song ends, we will give him the next chapter. And I will make sure he doesn’t rage like he did a few minutes ago.
AND NOW THE CONTINUATION!
{the song ends, and Psyga wakes up}
Ugh... Wow... That was bad. {is offered a glass of water and a pill} Huh? What’s this?
Kazuma: I see that you need some form of sedative in order to function to my liking.
Thanks, but I’m calm now. Next chapter.
Kazuma: Uh, why?
Look, we’re so far into this that there’s no backing out.
Kazuma: Uh... Okay then...
{the fanfic is projected on screen}
Wait, I thought I would read this on a paper.
Kazuma: Yeah, after your little incident a few minutes ago, Wataru and I took some measures to avoid a repeat of that.
Wait, you and Wataru are working together now?
Kazuma: Look, just read the chapter, I’ll explain later.
... Okay then...
So we start off with...
Spike remembering that he had a friend he knew for so long. Wow, now I am seeing actual Spike instead of Charlie in Spike’s clothing. Just for the record, every time Spike acts like Spike, I will read him in... well... Spike’s voice.
Oh, and it just so happens that the Rugrats are visiting San Francisco.
And-
... Flat "What". Did I just read that right? Anyways, this guy is ripping off Red’s plan, but instead of dragging all the dogs to hell, he’s dragging... Oh God...
... I’m not making this up... This is so meta that it’s becoming funny... So this villain, Joka, is a dragon... For all merits, I will imagine him as Adult!Dragon!Spike. But orange.
Ah, cool, Mega Crossover time-
{suddenly, Narutaki runs into the room}
Narutaki: It’s happening! The metaness! Random portals popping up! It’s all Decade’s fault! ONORE DIKEIDO!!!!
... Did you invite him Kazzy?
Kazuma: ... No. And never call me that again.
Okay then. {turns to Narutaki} Well, you’d be glad to know that Decade didn’t cause this. This was made way before his time. So, if you would excuse yourself...
Narutaki: Very well... but one day, Decade will destroy this world and-
Yeah, that’s nice. Byeeeeeeee. {shoves Narutaki out of the room} Now, where were we? Ah yes, the fact that this fanfic has suddenly gone meta. And the Nicktoons are jerks to the Rugrats for some reason. Okay, it’s because the Rugrats are more popular, but some of these guys are pretty nice guys, like Doug and Dog, and them suddenly acting like jerks means either Discord got to them or the author just derailed them. And since Friendship Is Magic didn’t come out for another decade or so, the latter seems to be true.
Anyways, Tommy notices that Spike isn’t dead anymore.
“Gasp! Someone I don’t know is back from the dead! I should be surprised even though I hate these toddlers’ guts and don’t even know who this guy is!”
I like how there’s no mention of Eliza while this is happening. I mean, she does have that Dolittle power and all. In fact, she’s the reason why Spike could speak in Rugrats Go Wild.
He’s got BALLS OF STEEL!
... Okay, that was funny. But the narrator brags on and on about how Joka is going to capture them and how he has every kind of weapon to use when they’re captured. Hey, here’s something: Have him do something instead of bragging about it. Stop with this Informed Attribute bull. Oh, and then the narrator just brings up that Red and Carface are helping Joka.
Okay, we get it! It’s getting annoying that you’re reminding us this. We’re not goldfish! And you don’t need to remind us that this is just a rip-off of All Dogs 2, which ironically enough was ripped-off just last chapter! Also, I gotta ask, if he has these Nickballs, which work like Pokeballs, why does he need to use this horn? He could just capture them with the balls. So after the Nicktoons harass the Rugrats for a bit (Yes, even Catdog, even though they met before and are buddy buds) Joka invades. And he tells them his plans...
...
...
...
You are a complete... You know what, let’s let Yuuto say it for us
. Seriously, if you tell these guys your evil plan, they will find a way to thwart it. Ever wonder why the best villains are the ones who are subtle with their plans? It’s because they don’t spill the beans until they think they’ve won. Oh, and this crystal ball pops up out of nowhere and only serves to show Joka that the Rugrats will be the ones to thwart his plan. So, then he sees the Rugrats, and then tells everyone that the only people that can save them are the Rugrats. Who are hearing this. Alright, can someone confiscate the Villain Ball from Joka’s hands? He’s been playing with it for too long. At least he has the smarts to actually make sure the Rugrats won’t be an obstacle.
We get it. You pointed that out before. Stop bashing it in our heads. So all the Rugrats save for Tommy are trapped in the Nickballs, and he and Spike run off.
You’re a dragon. They’re a baby and a dog. The fact that they can out run a dragon is worthy of the Guinness Book of World Records. So Joka puts the four Rugrats into some cells.
Didn’t know you can express doom. How does one express doom? Anyways, Tommy and Spike rendezvous’ with Itchy, David, and Sasha and they tell them the story.
“Yeah, talking dogs and horns that can allow dogs into heaven I can believe, but dragons? No way!”
... Who? Wait... Peppermint Pattie? I don’t think she’s a Nicktoon.
{Wataru’s voice comes in via intercom}
Wataru: Actually, Psyga, the story’s referring to Patti Mayonnaise from Doug.
Ooooooh. That forgettable show that I always forget about. Right. So Patti reveals that the Rugrats are in... Guess where. Alcatraz Prison.
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?!? But... I thought... Spike was supposed to be... What the hell?!? This is just batshit crazy! You’re telling me that Charlie, the actual Charlie, is in this fanfic even though Spike all but took over his role in both All Dogs and All Dogs 2? I wanna see where they go with this!
So they go to find him, but Joka ambushes them and tries to capture Tommy.
Shouldn’t you be saying Tommy was lucky since he didn’t get captured? Or are you rooting for Joka? You must be because you love to gush about how he has a plan to take away all the Nicktoons.
Charlie arrives and kicks his ass! Awesome!
You already used that before. What? You ran out of bland metaphors to tell us that they’re angry instead of showing us? He asks Carface what to do and he tells him to use Red’s collars... For some reason... Don’t the collars just give you a physical form? Or are you talking about the collars that become chokers?
... No. That is the stupidest disguise. It’s like making Sonic The Hedgehog green, giving him orange shoes, and calling it original. It’s just a stupid paintjob. After a song, they decide to work on their plan. They ambush Tommy and the gang again and make Tommy Brainwashed and Crazy.
... WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU GIVING AWAY ALL YOUR PLANS? YOU’RE NOT A GOOD VILLAIN IF YOU TELL EVERYONE YOUR PLANS! THIS IS THE DUMBEST VILLAIN I HAVE EVER SEEN IN THESE LIVEBLOGS! SALF-TACHI WASN’T THIS DUMB!
So anyways, under the threat of his life, Tommy tries to get Nick’s Horn. And Spike follows him, trying to convince him not to get the horn.
Dramatic pauses are... dramatic. Seriously, what was the point of that ellipsis point?
Anyone else getting Déjà vu? Yeah. This is just a rehash of a rehash of a not so good sequel. It’s stupid because we’ve just read this shit like a few minutes ago! So anyways, Joka gets the horn and declares his victory. Oh, and he grows for some reason. Tommy tried to get the horn back, but Joka kicks his ass.
OBJECTION!
YOU SERIOUSLY THINK THAT RIDDING NICK OF ITS NICKTOONS WILL MAKE IT AN ADULT NETWORK? Little do you know of the other shows they have! All That? Legends Of The Hidden Temple? The Adventures Of Pete And Pete? Even without their toons, they can’t be considered an adult network for they still have their other shows! Not to mention the lovely concept of licensing, where they can just syndicate other kids shows onto their channel. {slams on a desk} Admit it! {points his finger at Joka} Your villainous plan was flawed from the start!
Kazuma: You’re getting into this a little too much...
Shut up! I am giving a "Reason You Suck" Speech to Joka here! Now, listen here you dragon, what kind of stupid plan is making Nickelodeon an adult network? The only good that will do is make its ratings plummet and nearly get it kicked off the air for not being for kids! Why not just opt for an adult block? No. You want to be stupid and make the entire network for adults, even though the lack of Nicktoons will not be enough. And it’s not like your plans will work, considering that you blabbed about them constantly to the ears of those who can and will prevent them from being accomplished. It’s like admitting into the detective’s face “I’m the killer”. You’re just signing your plan’s death warrant. No self-respecting villain would have a plan that stupid. That evil chick from Chuck Austin’s run of the X-Men, the one who wanted to take over the world through making Nightcrawler the Pope, had a better plan than yours. And that, Joka, is why you’re the dumbest villain I have ever livebloged. You will never be Zira!
Kazuma: ... Are you done?
{song ends} Yeah. I am. Moving on, Spike manages to defeat Joka by tooting his magic horn. That apparently beats him because playing the horn releases all the Nicktoons from Alcatraz. You know, for it being The Alcatraz and all, it doesn’t really amount to jack shit when you have an idiot like Joka running it. And we never see him again, so we don’t really know if he’s beaten or just rage quit.
And then we end on some meta bullcrap that I’m not bothering to point out and that Spike doesn’t give a crap for his best friend and decide to stay with the dog he made friends with for only a day.
And this story is still not over. There’s about one more chapter left. One more.
Kazuma: Do you want to stop here?
Hell no! There’s only a few stories left! I’ll manage!
TO BE CONTINUED
