History Main / SuckinessIsPainful

-->Ow! Ow! This plothole is so bad it's actually physically hurting me. OW!\\
-- '''NostalgiaCritic''', reviewing ''{{Biodome}}''

-->Ouch, that was painful. So very, very lame.\\
-- '''Momoko''', ''WeddingPeachAbridged''

* [[HitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy Vogon Poetry]]
** Vogon poetry is, of course, only the third worst in the universe. The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a recitation by their poet master [[NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast Grunthos the Flatulent]] of his poem [[{{Squick}} "Ode To A Small Lump Of Green Putty I Found In My Armpit One Midsummer Morning"]], four of his audience died of internal hemorrhaging and the president of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived only by gnawing one of his own legs off. Grunthos was reported to have been [[{{Understatement}} "disappointed"]] by the poem's reception, and was about to [[DisproportionateRetribution embark on a reading of his]] [[FateWorseThanDeath 12-book epic entitled "My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles"]] when his own major intestine--in a desperate attempt to save life kind itself--[[HeroicSacrifice leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain]]. [[TakeThat The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator, Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings]] of [[SelfDeprecation Sussex, England, in the destruction of the planet Earth. Vogon poetry is mild by comparison.]]

Can overlap with AnythingButThat, FauxHorrific, DreadfulMusician.

* Pictured above: in ''{{Asterix}}'', Cacofonix' music is so bad, it's the only thing that can teach the meaning of fear to the Normans. In fact short exposure to it mentally scars them. It also summons thunderstorms and, drives the wildlife away.

[[caption-width-right:242:So painful it will teach you what fear is.]]

* Pictured above: in ''{{Asterix}}'' Cacofonix' music is so bad, it's the only thing that can teach the meaning of fear to the Normans. In fact short exposure to it mentally scars them.

Can overlap with AnythingButThat, FauxHorrific.

[[caption-width-right:330:So painful it will teach you fear.]]

[[quoteright:330:[[OrderOfTheStick http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/nale_has_standards_3894.jpg]]]]
[[caption-width-right:330:So painful that EvenEvilHasStandards.]]

-->"Should we break out the LeRoy Neiman paintings?"

* When TheNostalgiaCritic reviewed ''{{Junior}}'', he saw the baby dream with the greenscreen face of Arnold on the baby, and it made him scream like a girl, and then vomit all over the place.
** Really, this is kind of the Nostalgia Critic's whole schtick, except when he's reviewing something that's actually good or doing a top-eleven countdown.
** A lot of the reviewers on his site, actually. For example: "[[AtopTheFourthWall ANTI-LIFE JUSTIFIES MY HATE! Anti-life justifies my haaaaaattteee... *breaks down sobbing*]]"
* The special edition of ''RaidersOfTheLostArk'' in ''SouthPark'' was so horrible it had the same effect as the ark in the actual movie, killing GeorgeLucas, StevenSpielberg, and FrancisFordCoppola. [[NegativeContinuity Spielberg and Lucas came back in a later episode, though]].

* On ''TheCritic,'' Roger Ebert was interviewing a potential new partner and showed him the kind of bad movies he'd have to watch. A version of ''[[MrsDoubtfire Mrs. Doubtfire]]'' with Arnold Schwarzenegger in the title role fully skeletonized him.
** And when Roger starts up his next review, Sylvester Stallone in "Yo! Godot! I'm Waitin' Here!", the corpse's skull falls off.

* In ''YuGiOhTheAbridgedSeries'' Marik being forced to watched ''BeverlyHillsChihuahua'' was so horrible it drove him to evil.
* An episode of ''SpongebobSquarepants'' revolves around Patrick's self-composed song, which is so awful that it [[BrownNote actually]] ''[[BrownNote kills]]'' the band that records it.
* [[HitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy Vogon Poetry]]

* Blink and you'll miss it, but in ''SayonaraZetsubouSensei'', Itoshki-sensei's suicide kit, filled with poisons, pills and all manner of lethalities, also contains an Enya CD.
** I think that was supposed to be suicide-mood-music (like they might put on when you get a massage, only for killing yourself).
*
-->[[TopSecret "Should]] [[CommieNazis we]] [[ColdBloodedTorture break out the LeRoy Neiman paintings?"]]
-->[[EvenEvilHasStandards "No, we don't want to violate the Geneva convention."]]

* -->[[TopSecret "Should]] [[CommieNazis we]] [[ColdBloodedTorture break out the LeRoy Neiman paintings?"]]

** A lot of the reviewers on his site, actually. For example: "[[AtopTheFourthWall ANTI-LIFE JUSTIFIES MY HATE! Anti-life justifies my haaaaaattteee... * breaks down sobbing* ]]"

* On ''TheCritic,'' Roger Ebert was interviewing a potential new partner and showed him the kind of bad movies he'd have to watch. A version of ''[[MrsDoubtfire Mrs. Doubtfire]]'' with Arnold Schwartzenegger in the title role fully skeletonized him.

* And then there's the aftereffects of an IncrediblyLamePun. We've all seen or heard one that makes us wince.

-->Ow... ow... this plot hole is so bad it's physically hurting me.\\
-- '''TheNostalgiaCritic''', on ''Biodome''

-->During a recitation by their Poet Master Grunthos the Flatulent of his poem ''"Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found In My Armpit One Midsummer Morning"'', four of his audience died of internal hemorrhaging and the President of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one of his own legs off.\\
-- '''The Guide''', ''The HitchHikersGuideToTheGalaxy''

-->I feel raped! I feel honest-to-God ''raped'' by this movie, it is ''that bad''!\\
-- '''TheNostalgiaCritic''', on ''TheGarbagePailKidsMovie''